Are you happy you MTF transitioned, to whatever extent you have come along on your transition journey?
Happy with what I have, but disappointed that I am not as far as I expected to be by now.
I am disappointed with my results after almost 5 years. I am glad that I lost almost all of my body hair though. I am happy to have finally come out publicly and mostly I wear skirts. I am waiting on GRS Montreal to get back to me so that I can set up my appointment. After quite a bit of thought I think I will likely go zero depth.
Happy with what I have, specially for my age, but now stuck.
I want SRS, I want SRS, I will never get SRS.
I cannot afford private surgery. The toxic anti trans UK means the only option of the NHS that I have been waiting 4 years and not even on the starting blocks. Could be withdrawn with a complete ban.
We were brought up being told the NHS will support one's health care through out one's life, free at the point of delivery. So there was never a culture of health insurance. More and more now we are having to resolve to getting it, but gender reassignment is never covered.
Hence I think I have come to the end of my journey.
What is the cost of this private pay surgery where you are at, or a country you can go to for safe surgery and recovery follow-up?
Quote from: Jessica_K on April 20, 2024, 02:17:15 AMHappy with what I have, specially for my age, but now stuck.
I want SRS, I want SRS, I will never get SRS.
I cannot afford private surgery. The toxic anti trans UK means the only option of the NHS that I have been waiting 4 years and not even on the starting blocks. Could be withdrawn with a complete ban.
We were brought up being told the NHS will support one's health care through out one's life, free at the point of delivery. So there was never a culture of health insurance. More and more now we are having to resolve to getting it, but gender reassignment is never covered.
Hence I think I have come to the end of my journey.
This.
I am in the same boat with VA coverage. Lots of promises and none of them were kept. Even the cheapest option (going to Thailand) is out of my reach. But there are financing options that I am looking into.
Hugs, Jess!
Transition simply saved my life, and nearly killed me! I live comfortably in my identified gender and I am rebuilding my life. I am finished transitioning as my dysphoria is negligible.
Jessica, I feel for you. There is practically no gender surgery available on our public system in Australia as there are no gender surgeons who work in the public system. We either need to buy insurance to cover private hospital costs in Australia or go overseas (usually to Thailand), but the cost is nearly the same at AUD$30k to AUD$40k (US$20k to US$25k). So many simply can't get this essential care.
Hugs,
Allie
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on April 20, 2024, 06:51:08 AMWhat is the cost of this private pay surgery where you are at, or a country you can go to for safe surgery and recovery follow-up?
To be honest, I would be afraid to go anywhere other than in the UK or possibly US. UK is £20k-£30k. Do not know US costs. I do not want to go to Thailand.
Yes, I am very happy I transitioned, and happy with the results. The results would be better if I had started 40 years earlier, but for an almost-70-year-old dame, I can't complain. I am the same person I was before, just happier because I don't have to pretend all the time.
It was 7 years ago today that I stood up at the community kaffeeklatsch as <deadname> and announced that from then on I would be Kathy. I like the results, both physical and social.
I had some post-operative pain for a couple of years after my surgery, but that has passed, and the scar tissue is gradually loosening up.
So it is all good here.
The future, ... well, that might be another story.
Happy? Happiness if fleeting. I have joy. Yes it been less than 2 years since I've been out, but I love that I can sit the way I feel comfortable. Walk the way I want and feel great doing it. I was a grumpy old man! Pretending to be something I wasn't. Now I've been reborn as a happy, joy filled woman. Yes, there are days I feel down about things but my gender is not one of them. So looking forward to my bottom surgery in less than 2 months. Someone asked me if I was worried that I was making the right decision for surgery. No doubts, YES.
I am very happy I transitioned. I am treated female and just happy with my body and how I am treated.
i think this is a tricky question to answer. i am glad i transitioned in as much as i don't regret it, and i don't think i really had any choice but to transition.
at the same time for me, progress with transition has always come at a cost of something. i've lost contact with my family entirely, its caused me to lose a lot of security in my life elsewhere; its very much been destabilising, especially in the last few years. my 20's were very much a case of transition taking up all my time and energy, and gradually requiring me to cut away things from my life. and i found myself at nearly 30 having to basically start life all over again.
currently I'm feeling very unsafe too.
i think its hard to say i am 'happy'. but i also do not regret anything. and i have come further than i thought i would, which is cool. give me a few more years and maybe things will be more stable and i can say i'm happy with transition, too
To say "I'm happy I transitioned" would be like saying "I'm happy I received treatment for cancer". Yes, I am happy that I'm still alive, which wouldn't be the case if I hadn't transitioned when I did. My life got immeasurably better, but I came from a very low place. There are still things I'd like to have done but it's always a struggle financially. Being a pariah for having a medical condition doesn't make me happy, so as long as I can keep that a secret I guess I'm doing alright.
This is avery interesting question!
I would say that, overall, I am very happy with my transition so far.
As LoriDii said, I am also a tad disappointed that, in almost seven years of transition, I have not progressed more (in terms of my medical transition/surgeries I'd like to eventually get).
But, I would say that my life has 100% improved since I started living as a woman 24/7.
I mentioned briefly on my introduction post, but I'm 32, and I started my medical transition when I was 26, started living 24/7 as a woman at 27, and I have genuinely been happier in these past five years of my life as a woman, than I had ever been in the 26 years prior!
So, if I look at the bigger picture -without focusing so much on the things that I'd still like to change-, I would say, yes, I am very very happy with my transition so far!
And I genuinely can't wait to feel even more comfortable in my body!
Quote from: allylioness on April 22, 2024, 07:07:47 PMThis is avery interesting question!
I would say that, overall, I am very happy with my transition so far.
As LoriDii said, I am also a tad disappointed that, in almost seven years of transition, I have not progressed more (in terms of my medical transition/surgeries I'd like to eventually get).
But, I would say that my life has 100% improved since I started living as a woman 24/7.
I mentioned briefly on my introduction post, but I'm 32, and I started my medical transition when I was 26, started living 24/7 as a woman at 27, and I have genuinely been happier in these past five years of my life as a woman, than I had ever been in the 26 years prior!
So, if I look at the bigger picture -without focusing so much on the things that I'd still like to change-, I would say, yes, I am very very happy with my transition so far!
And I genuinely can't wait to feel even more comfortable in my body!
Good for you!
Chrissy
I have been happy for the most part, it can come and go.
The only source of true joy is from the Lord for me. Joy found this way does not come and go.
Chrissy
I transitioned 7 years ago, got my SRS a year ago. (Would you believe USA Medicare paid for it?)
Both have definitely improved my life a lot. Life isn't a bowl of cherries (or whatever), but whenever I ask myself if I would go back, every part of me says "no @#$% way!!!"
These days I notice the absence of the masculine "rules" that used to make my life miserable, no matter how much I tried to ignore them. It's also very nice that I can look in the mirror and see a woman, not a man. (At least when I have my wig on.) An ugly old woman, but I'm OK with that. And when I talk to women, I no longer see the guardedness that I always saw before. I don't know how much I really belong to womankind at this point, but I seem to be accepted more and I feel almost normal.
Before I had my SRS, I never realized how much having that thing on me bothered me -- it was like a sense of shame. And once the SRS was done, I think even before the dressing came off, I felt so much better about my body. I no longer have to see-but-not-see when I look at my body.
The only thing that still bugs me is the male pattern baldness. But just a few days ago, I discovered that a cis woman I know also has male-pattern baldness and wears wigs. And it's getting to bother me less -- I feel like I mostly just look a lot older without my wig, especially since what hair I do have is pretty wispy and thin, so it's more like old, old lady hair.
Now my efforts with my therapist (formerly my gender therapist) are directed at dealing with my Complex PTSD from childhood. (That's a very long road...)
Yes, I am very happy I transitioned and I am very happy with the results. I fully transitioned as I did get SRS. I cant imagine myself anymore as man. When I started out, I was told that hormones will change you physically and mentally. It really did.
The physical part, well i grew D cup breasts and I inherited my mothers body shape, slightly exaggerated hour glass shape. When my skin and face feminized i look even more like my mother now. Very Happy with my body. My breasts are natural, come from a family of bigger breasted women. I will properly follow my mothers example and get work done on my breasts when I am older, when gravity catches up with my girls, i dont want to go much bigger, maybe DD. It it will be to more firm things up again. I am very happy with my body. I love wearing dresses and tops that show off some cleavage. I also love showing off my legs and wearing heels as it makes my carves look better.
Mentally, this part surprised me. I am all female in mind, my style of thinking has changed and I do think like a woman. I found I got more emotional, this is the part that surprised. I cry far more easily in the front the tv and so some reason I get cold more easily. I am married to a man and I am very happy as his wife. When I wore my wedding dress, I felt like a princess and was extra special when my mother wanted me to wear my grandmothers pearls as my something borrowed. I wanted to cry when she put it around my neck, but could not as the makeup artist had just finished her work. All the women from my mother side for a few generations now have worn those pearls on their wedding day. Someday my daughters will as well. I assumed the traditional female role in the marriage, I look after the household, I cook for my man and please my man in the bedroom too. Since I cant have children, we have adopted 3 wonderful children (2 girls and a boy). We adopted them all as new borns, so yes all the feeding and diaper changes were done mostly by me. I love been a mother and the first time my oldest called me mommy.. my heart melted.
When I started out as cross dresser as a teen, I never in my wildest dreams would have imagined I would end up an outgoing woman, wife and mother when I grew up. I was a very closed off child, very shy and a bit of a recluse and I became an outgoing woman.. that saved me. I met a female friend after i finished school and she encourages me to explore my female side... she tutored me in the ways of a woman. She saved me,if I had not met her and she never found out my secret, I have no idea where I would be now, properly in a basement somewhere hiding from the world.
Even when I started transitioning, I never knew if I wanted SRS, but as time went on it was something i wanted and when the opportunity came up, i grabbed it with both hands.
Regrets well, I wish I had discovered this earlier.. I was 21 when I started on hormones, I would loved to have being a teenage girl. The female me is more outgoing, and then I could have taken part more in high school and enjoyed what the school had to offer. I had only really no friends at school and was very shy so I hid from everything. As woman I made a close circle of friends.
Something else, I only started being sad about this after I was married. I am very sad, I cant give my husband a baby. I would love to be pregnant and then give birth to his child. My friends have had kids already and they say, pregnancy is uncomfortable, but a magical time and giving birth is painful, but worth it when you meet your child. When we adopted our child at my baby shower they made my wear a 9 month pregnancy tummy, I loved it. My husband told me, I looked so beautiful pregnant. My friend told me, I am lucky I dont menstruate, I get all the good parts of womanhood without the messy parts. For me I would gladly "suffer" with monthly menstruation if it meant I could have a baby.
But I dont regret transitioning one bit.
Quote from: noleen111 on April 26, 2024, 08:24:18 AMYes, I am very happy I transitioned and I am very happy with the results. I fully transitioned as I did get SRS. I cant imagine myself anymore as man. When I started out, I was told that hormones will change you physically and mentally. It really did.
The physical part, well i grew D cup breasts and I inherited my mothers body shape, slightly exaggerated hour glass shape. When my skin and face feminized i look even more like my mother now. Very Happy with my body. My breasts are natural, come from a family of bigger breasted women. I will properly follow my mothers example and get work done on my breasts when I am older, when gravity catches up with my girls, i dont want to go much bigger, maybe DD. It it will be to more firm things up again. I am very happy with my body. I love wearing dresses and tops that show off some cleavage. I also love showing off my legs and wearing heels as it makes my carves look better.
Mentally, this part surprised me. I am all female in mind, my style of thinking has changed and I do think like a woman. I found I got more emotional, this is the part that surprised. I cry far more easily in the front the tv and so some reason I get cold more easily. I am married to a man and I am very happy as his wife. When I wore my wedding dress, I felt like a princess and was extra special when my mother wanted me to wear my grandmothers pearls as my something borrowed. I wanted to cry when she put it around my neck, but could not as the makeup artist had just finished her work. All the women from my mother side for a few generations now have worn those pearls on their wedding day. Someday my daughters will as well. I assumed the traditional female role in the marriage, I look after the household, I cook for my man and please my man in the bedroom too. Since I cant have children, we have adopted 3 wonderful children (2 girls and a boy). We adopted them all as new borns, so yes all the feeding and diaper changes were done mostly by me. I love been a mother and the first time my oldest called me mommy.. my heart melted.
When I started out as cross dresser as a teen, I never in my wildest dreams would have imagined I would end up an outgoing woman, wife and mother when I grew up. I was a very closed off child, very shy and a bit of a recluse and I became an outgoing woman.. that saved me. I met a female friend after i finished school and she encourages me to explore my female side... she tutored me in the ways of a woman. She saved me,if I had not met her and she never found out my secret, I have no idea where I would be now, properly in a basement somewhere hiding from the world.
Even when I started transitioning, I never knew if I wanted SRS, but as time went on it was something i wanted and when the opportunity came up, i grabbed it with both hands.
Regrets well, I wish I had discovered this earlier.. I was 21 when I started on hormones, I would loved to have being a teenage girl. The female me is more outgoing, and then I could have taken part more in high school and enjoyed what the school had to offer. I had only really no friends at school and was very shy so I hid from everything. As woman I made a close circle of friends.
Something else, I only started being sad about this after I was married. I am very sad, I cant give my husband a baby. I would love to be pregnant and then give birth to his child. My friends have had kids already and they say, pregnancy is uncomfortable, but a magical time and giving birth is painful, but worth it when you meet your child. When we adopted our child at my baby shower they made my wear a 9 month pregnancy tummy, I loved it. My husband told me, I looked so beautiful pregnant. My friend told me, I am lucky I dont menstruate, I get all the good parts of womanhood without the messy parts. For me I would gladly "suffer" with monthly menstruation if it meant I could have a baby.
But I dont regret transitioning one bit.
I relate to so much you said. The emotional side, the confidence and outgoing, the inside being a woman. The D cup lol,
When I look back at my long life I see how much I have missed out on because I was not born with the right body.
Your life sounds like the next best thing, xxx
Hugs
Jessica
Xxx
I'm happy that I tried, even though I waited too long. Estrogen just didn't change me enough to make me need to come out. I've told my therapist many times that if I was in my 20's now, it would be totally different. It just wasn't an option when I grew up.
I don't really think I'll ever live my life as my true self. Even if I get bottom surgery, I'll probably still hide myself to the world. I'm just too much of a chicken and I worry too much about what others think. Which probably means I'll never feel complete. Sad!
Quote from: Jessica_K on April 28, 2024, 01:10:25 AMWhen I look back at my long life I see how much I have missed out on because I was not born with the right body.
I read lots of posts by trans women who say they wish they'd been born female.
Not to say that they are wrong when it comes to themselves, but I don't feel that way about myself. There was all kinds of stuff I suffered because I was assigned male but didn't fit in the box society tried to make me fit into, but I don't believe it would have been a lot better if I'd been assigned female -- it would have been different, but probably not any less awful. The world I grew up in had rigid ideas of what boys and girls had to be and treated anyone who didn't fit in pretty harshly.
I have a younger sister, and while I don't think they were quite as brutal with her (though I may have missed some stuff since she was 9 years younger), people still treated her like something was wrong with her. And there still seems to be a conflict in her between how she believes she is supposed to be and who she really is inside, though I don't think she's ever faced up to it. Twenty years ago I realized that I had to deal my own version of this or I would soon be dead, and that ultimately lead to my transitioning.
Actually, I think if I'd been assigned female at birth, I would have been a very different person. The years of living as male were horrible, but dealing with that has given me a depth of understanding about myself and even (to some extent) other people that I don't think I would have had if I'd grown up in a role more compatible with my nature. There's stuff I see that my cis friends, even the more insightfull ones, don't see. (Of course, sometimes that reinforces my feeling that I'm not really human :( )
Quote from: Asche on May 06, 2024, 06:13:08 AMActually, I think if I'd been assigned female at birth, I would have been a very different person. The years of living as male were horrible, but dealing with that has given me a depth of understanding about myself and even (to some extent) other people that I don't think I would have had if I'd grown up in a role more compatible with my nature. There's stuff I see that my cis friends, even the more insightfull ones, don't see. (Of course, sometimes that reinforces my feeling that I'm not really human :( )
I agree with this so much. The world was a much different place when I was growing up. Being cast in a male role taught me things from experiences that were not available to women. I was a Tank Master Gunner in the Army. Combat jobs were not available to women until recently. I learned how to be strong mentally and physically.
Had I been female the abuse I went through would have been far more traumatizing. I still pine for things I did not get to experience like being a girl and learning about clothes, hairstyles, and makeup. But I can learn those now. I wish I had more time to spend enjoying it. I am not immortal yet.
I can't help but think there is a reason for my life unfolding as it has. I can accept that.
Yes.