Now is the time to gaze away at your navel, Allie, just as long as you don't become eternally fixated on it. No belly button is that interesting, unless, perhaps, you're Mark Twain or Abe Lincoln.

No cluster tonight (hooray!) but when that happens that also means my migraine doesn't break... so I need to hit it with one last blast of pain meds and wait until it dissipates to the point that I can sleep.

So while I'm walking that pain/impairment line, just figured I'd share some more thoughts from today.

And I do apologize for so much just raw "navel-gazing" as I called it when chatting with Sara earlier. I told her I feel like the last 10 days when I close my eyes the world literally stops spinning. She said this period is like that so to give myself a pass. And so I shall.

Anyway, as mentioned a few things that, upon reflection, stuck out.

My friend the doctor? Maybe it's just how well I know him. Maybe if I provided a transcript of what he said, you all would say it was universally lovely. But for me, I feel like, while he and his wife are clearly supportive, I have no doubt he looks down on all of this.

Why? Well, he kept saying how bad he felt for me. I mean, sure, that was somewhat based on how long I've dealt with this, but it was more than that. Because he'd always follow that up with a surprised "but you sound good now" as if to say "despite the horrible thing you're dealing with." THAT felt like the undercurrent.

He kept asking about my wife, and if she was ok. And could he call her separately? First of all, he has a relationship with her so of course he could... but did he think I had her hostage?

Now maybe it was the fourth of these chats in four hours... but I don't think so. I just think it was a bunch of little cues and/or tells. They were/are benign. And I'm fine with it all. It's just that his was the only expression of pity... which really I don't have any use for. Bedside manner and all.

Of the other five? I had two amazing chats with friends who, at the end of which, we fell back into our old routines... and this evening were texting about the stuff we normally text. Which is how I know all is well.

Another was a wonderful text exchange with a chat set for Thursday, but I can tell we're good.

Another was a very curt message saying just "I was obviously surprised, but if you're happy I'm 100% good with it. Let's talk later."

Context there -I felt awful sending to him, in fact I almost pulled him from the "bucket"... but I really wanted him to know first. The reason to pull him was he is literally trying to get his latest book to his publisher by today. And when he called the other day needing advice on something, I told him he had "book voice" -- which is how he gets when he's at the finish line. So I hated the idea of adding to his burden.

Gosh I'm really looking forward to hopping onto that electrolysis table tomorrow morning and just relaxing. I really need a break.

Ok.. pain meds very much kicking in.

'night

@NatalieRene   @Delsorou   @EndlessEden   
@Karii Cloud   @skakid   @Jay.Lewis.P

      6 Members Birthdays to recognize on May 01, 2024

    Wishing each of you a very Happy Birthday
                 

What are your plans for your Birthday? 
        Dinner out with friends and family?
            Cake?  Candles?  Special trip?

On your Birthday, check your profile for a special gift...

    Again, wishing you well and enjoy your special day.
Warm Regards,
Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
                 

That's how I found my favorite color nail polish!
I tried various colors and nothing excited me. My Bestie gave me two bottles of polish. She rarely wears it, but she knew I like pink and metallic. She gave me a bottle of pink chrome and clear hardener with glitter called Cocktail. She thought they were to be worn separately. But I put the hardener over the pink and WOWZA! I love it. I've received so many compliments on my nails, that I contacted LA Color and bought three bottles of each as my backup. 

Everyone's rights are under threat now.  But, we seem to be on the bleeding edge.

fun one from the other day. cheryl (the bestie whom i came out to) texts me i think friday. shes like, random, but i have this bag of makeup mostly new, don't need or want, free to a good home. like...heck yes! made me smile.

Cheeseburger deluxe with tater tots.

Cite sight