Good luck but mostly... have fun!

I consider myself female but most people would say I'm non binary since I'm non op and non HRT.
I socialize freely presenting as female, having a passable figure, voice, and mannerisms.
Which means that even if I identify as male on the phone or in person, the other person will often recognize me as female and identify me as female, forgetting what they knew or what they were told!

It took me a long time to realize that trying to present as a male was futile, that only put in the uncanny valley that made people uncomfortable.
Fortunately I live in New England, where folks are cool with people outside the binary!
I recall an openly transgender girl at a party back around 1987.  A long time ago in New England.
Now Connecticut has gender protection laws.

Hello Danielle

Thank you so much for your kind words and your wisdom, you say to yourself, "but I'm not wise", unfortunately whether you think of those words or not, you are and it simply shows in your writings to the members of Susan's:

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on Today at 11:43:57 AM@Sarah B
Dear Sarah B:
I so very much enjoyed reading about your sweet and caring thoughts
that you expressed for your mum.

As I have already said, "your kind words," do not go unnoticed by me and most of all by others here on Susan's. I'm happy that you enjoyed the post that I wrote.

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on Today at 11:43:57 AM
Many members here that are transitioning or have transitioned do not have,
or may have never had that kind of unconditional support from a parent
and other close family members.

This is what troubled me the most on whether, I posted on the relationship between my mother and her children, especially in regards to me.  It hurts me so deeply that others do not or have some support, bond or connection with their family.

Do I post or do I not post?, it did not matter in the end as I alluded to what I wrote in my above post.  So I posted, knowing it may hurt some and letting others know that family members will love them for who they are.  As time moves forwarded and hopefully acceptance will be come the norm of accepting people who are different from themselves.

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on Today at 11:43:57 AM
Count yourself very fortunate.

Thank you for sharing and for posting your update on your blog thread.

Quote from: Northern Star Girl on Today at 11:43:57 AMMany HUGS,
Danielle

I know I'm very fortunate, but even it hurts me to some extent knowing that, while other are not so fortunate.

You are most welcome, it was my pleasure in doing so.

Love and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter
@Northern Star Girl

Quote from: D'Amalie on Today at 10:13:18 AMOf course you know this means war?!
Music is almost always going, especially in the garage!  I don't run anymore.
I like the bath and asper creme.

Like last week, I drove up to Montana (10 hours round trip)  just for the spectacular Aurora Borealis.
Music all the way.
Back 30 years ago, I'd run for hours with Pink Floyd on the Walkman.  Kind of difficult on the obstacle course though.

When working from home.. yes, I have a soundtrack. Its so well known people on calls even talk at my speaker for me. "Hey Sonos! stop". Biking or walking not so much. I live urban enough I need the feedback to not get hit. I am not that good a cyclist I can ignore the world around me. yet.

~Jenn

Quote from: davina61 on Today at 10:06:40 AMHave a good time dear, I will run the hot bath for after !

Quote from: LoriDee on Today at 11:10:23 AMGood luck, Jenn.
The Susan's Place Cheerleading Squad is rooting for you.

Hugs!

Thanks! I drove in over the a few miles of the course.. and texted my friend "my legs don't like you anymore". HILLS! I am just going to grind it out.

~Jenn

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on Today at 09:39:41 AMDo you listen to music when you ride competitively or train?


Chrissy

When riding outside, no I don't use headphones for safety. Or music really.

When riding on the trainer, inside, yeah-- I have a wide variety of music. Everything from the Grateful Dead to hyperpop (especially 100 gecs).

~Jenn

Hello Chrissy

You said:

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on Today at 12:23:16 PMI think the card and its expressed thoughts are very nice.

and

Quote from: ChrissyRyan on Today at 12:23:50 PMCute cat also!

Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughts.  It is appreciated very much.

Love and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter
@ChrissyRyan

Very nice jewelry Lori!

Chrissy

Hello Leo

My name is Sarah B and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!

Quote from: Leo1997 on Today at 04:57:46 PMHi everyone, i wanted to really ask for some advice about identity and how you all came to realise what you really identify as?

I never questioned my identity and I still don't know why to this day.  I suppose I should have, may be I just accepted myself as I am.  Maybe it was the time, where this information was not around, so I was not constantly asking who I am.  In my case, I have always wanted or longed to be a female, more so between the years 1980 and 1988.  I changed my life around in 1989 and it was not until 2010 that I realised I had always been a female.  I only found this out from Susan's.  So in the long run I never worried about my identity and I still don't till this day.  I'm just me!

Quote from: Leo1997 on Today at 04:57:46 PMA few years ago i first came here under my original account which seems to have been lost asking for advice as to whether i was a transgender woman, but more recently I've began to wonder if i may closer identify with a non binary identity?

Danielle our Forum Administrator, if anyone might be able to find your lost account.  She will ask you for some information privately, so as to help you in this area.

To be able to answer your question, you will need to seek the services of a psychiatrist, psychologist or therapist that deals with 'gender' issues and only you will able to determine, who you really are.

Quote from: Leo1997 on Today at 04:57:46 PMI really appreciate it is hard to tell how another person feels internally, but what i really wanted to ask if anyone could share their story on how they became aware that they themselves were non binary, so i can begin to try to understand what i am feeling more clearly

Thanks as always! Leo

You are more than welcome as Susan's Place is a place where you can seek out the answers you seek, to find out who you are.

Yes, you are right and only a trained 'therapist' with many years experience, would be able to come close to being able to tell how a person feels internally after many sessions of course and even then still would be able to say definitely how you really feel about yourself and only you will be able to make that final decision on who you really are.

Unfortunately I'm unable to help you on the non binary issue, as I'm just a female.  In addition there are members of Susan's who will more than likely will be able to discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as there are members who have experienced these problems or issues that you are having as well.

Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the various forums and threads.  I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new and returning members.

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!
Sarah B
Offical Greeter
@LoriDee
@Northern Star Girl
@Leo1997

I've known since I was a child that I didn't fit the usual picture of "male."  I kept rejecting (in my mind) the whole bunch of ridiculous expectations put on people assigned male, and adjusted to them as little as I could get away with.  As I grew older, I saw more and more of what girls and women face, and thought most of it was garbage, too.  (I became a feminist pretty much as soon as I learned about it.)

Once I saw that I might be trans and that transition was possible for me, I started on that road.  I think of myself as a refugee from "Manistan" fleeing to "Femininia."   I now live as a woman, but only to the extent I feel like -- one thing feminism has done is widen the spectrum of what women are expected to be.

But I don't say that I have become a woman, any more than a refugee in the USA becomes a native-born (US) American.  As for "identifying" as a woman -- I don't even understand what that would mean.  I'm me, but being male or female (or non-binary) aren't essential parts of who I am.  They're just how I have to relate to a world ruled by the gender binary.  I fit myself into the female role because it fits better than the male role ever did, but it's not "who I am."

That's why I call myself non-binary.   I've also noticed that I feel a lot more at home among non-binary people than among the binary trans folks -- it seems like a lot of binary trans folks are obsessed with stuff I don't care about.