Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Went to a restaurant with my wife tonight and the waitress didn't know who to give the bill too. ;D
Was in tee and shorts too. No makeup.
It been happening allot recently.
Six months ago and before that I always got the bill.

Please share some of yours.
This should be fun.

Men often hold the door for me.

Quote from: Jillieann on August 05, 2011, 07:29:28 PM
Men often hold the door for me.

Yeah, I get that a lot, too.

I knew I was passing when I was at a restaurant with some friends and the waiter couldn't figure out why there were two male name credit cards and only one male that he could see.

Some of mine:

Taking five minutes to convince a store clerk that I was the person on my license so that I could buy alcohol (even after dropping into boy voice)

The nice girl at Victoria's Secret looking at me in amazement when I told her I'd never worn a bra, then asking me why

Yet another store clerk ask (while looking at my license) "Is that your boyfriend?"  Me: "No..."  Her: "Your husband?"  Me: "No..."  Her: (30 seconds later) "OOOOOOH!!!"

My friend and I talking about how inexplicable boys are in a restaurant, and having the waitress and manager come over to join the discussion

The Social Security clerk looking at my license and saying "But this is <boy name>'s license"

And of course, every time I go shopping with my friends and hearing "How are you ladies doing?"

I'll never get over these! ;D  But I'm SO glad my name change is legal and I have a new license!

Zoë,

QuoteBut I'm SO glad my name change is legal and I have a new license!

Yea! That's great.
When I use a credit card I'm sure they believe it is my husbands. ;)

I forgot to add one that I've mentioned on this site before. My upstairs neighbor asked me what happened to the boy that was living downstairs with my wife.

When guys whistle at you when your out for a run.

I'm not passing as well as you girls yet. If I say I'm a male, or give out my male ID, it is a give away. But I am full time nonetheless and have had my moments in this first week of full time.

Being sent towards the girls changing room.

Hearing "Lady! You forgot your bag!"

Receiving a kiss on the cheek from a guy when he says hi or goodbye

Maiara, you pass better than you think you do.

    I have more trouble passing in male mode then as a woman. When im dressed as male i don't get the guy "head nod" thing anymore from other guys, instead they just smile and say hi or a long heeey  ;) it makes me feel a little weird cuz im dressed as a guy and not a girl.  :laugh:


       
         

I like this topic. Some of mine are:

Passing teenage girls and boys and not getting a second glance or giggles from them.

Going to Motor Vehicles to get a new license with my old Texas boy one and being told pointedly "Well, this is HIS license."

Having the girl at the restaurant refer to me as "she" and "her" without makeup.

A guy at work asked me to "turn me on" (he meant the engine of the car he was riding in) and me saying in a saucy way "I don't think I could turn you on honey" and then his reply of "Oh, I'm pretty sure you could." LOL.

Asking another guy at work what the "good word" was and him saying "it is hot baby girl."

Telling a straight girl that I used to be a guy and her accusing me of pulling her leg and lying.

Seeing hundreds of guests a day and having them all say "mam."

Passing isn't new to me anymore, but it still feels great. I don't take it for granted and note when these things happen. I hope all of you get to feel that some day.

Passing is becoming normal for me too but I cherish it just the same.
And I'm loving it. ;D

QuoteI don't take it for granted and note when these things happen. I hope all of you get to feel that some day.

I so agree Melody.

Getting stuck by road construction while in my bikini then having the flagman smile and bend to get a better look at me. As I slowly passed him he smiled and tipped his hardhat and said "HEY THERE MA'AM!"  ;D

Jennifer

Oh Wow!
Jennifer that has got to be a high.
Hugs,
Jillieann

Quote from: Jillieann on August 05, 2011, 11:15:55 PM
Oh Wow!
Jennifer that has got to be a high.
Hugs,
Jillieann

Yes it was my first time ever and it gave me butterflies. What a great feeling. :)

Jennifer

You know you're passing when you don't even think about it anymore.  Whether or not I pass hasn't really crossed my mind for over a year now.  Incidentally I can't even remember the last time I was called sir.

Maddie,
not even over the phone?!

I get "mistered" over the phone all the time - and I do not have a very low voice.
Must sound like a "Queen" to most --- is my best guess.
That is my issue if I would want to call it that.

Otherwise I'm doing fine, bar the odd reminder when I step out in ~ boy-guise ~ , jeans, loose jersey, no boobs showing, trainers if you can picture it.

I do garner these: "What is it now Boy-or-Girl?" looks on my daily health walk.

So in fairness I may be passing only 50/50 by looks alone.

I think too wide/square-ish shoulders also do not help, etc. etc. etc. same old, same old.
But that's just too bad, and I have learned to live with it.

Axelle
PS: I easily lost 1 - 2 sizes in my shoulders already! My mom was pretty muscular...

Looking at a skirt and the sales woman asks what size are you after, I say I'm usually an 8 or a 10. She replies these are a tight cut, try the 10 and a 12.

Walking into my local hotel restaurant and Dave the manger sees me and says, Cindy you are on Table 4, and the people in the queue look at me with the 'Why is she getting special treatment, he must be in her pants :laugh:'

Hello Axélle

I hesitated to say it because it sounds a bit like looking down on others (so please don't take it that way! :)), but yes, like Maddie said, you know you pass when you don't think about whether you pass any more. I have been full time for 7 months and by now, I expect to pass so I don't really feel anything any more when people say something that are female-specific to me...

As for the voice, I am fortunate to have quite a passable girl voice from the start, so I actively used my voice to pass when my looks didn't quite pass yet. I seldom get ma'ams though because I sound a bit young (last time I called my country's health service to chase up on some payments, the operator started saying something like "well you don't want to trouble your mum and dad do you darling?"... hellooo I'm old enough to have my own finances already!)

But anyway! I think the thread was intended to mean more like "signs that people are treating you as female rather than male" so... here's one I like: little kids like to smile at me when I smile at them!

Not even over the phone.  My student loans are still in my old name so whenever I had to call them up the situation took a little explaining.  I had to address something with the account and they said, "...And you're his...?"
        "Doppleganger," I should have replied.  What I actually said was, "I had a name change among other things."
        "Oh," the operator said, "You can send in the certified copy of the court order and we can get that taken care of for you."

Cindy, you sure make ME laugh again :-) giggle

Apple, very good. Yes, I do have children smile at me too, 'cause I'm a nice gal (mostly :-)

If folks look at me, more guys like these days, I'm more inclined to think they scheme: "- some strangely hot number for her age" :-)
Then looking at their wives accompanying them, I do know WHY :-)
Gives me a buzz in my nether regions, heehee.

Yeah, even my voice when 1:1 is more likely a sexy more lowish growl --- like having had my share of bar customers and smokes (which I did). Thankfully I stopped even before HRT.

Thanks girls for making me feel good this morn,
Axelle
PS: Hey, if you feel hot, you hot (for most in any case... :-)

Quote from: Maddie Secutura on August 06, 2011, 06:00:16 AM
Not even over the phone.  My student loans are still in my old name so whenever I had to call them up the situation took a little explaining.  I had to address something with the account and they said, "...And you're his...?"

That's great!! ;D  I had something similar happen a few times.  Called the bank back in April to get the tax info that they didn't send me, and they wouldn't give it to me because "he [had] to call for that himself."  I've also called my cable company and my student loan company (a few times) and, even after going through the identity verification process, got nothing but "ma'am" and "miss <last name>" from the operators.  They never even asked me a question, but did it naturally. :laugh:

EDIT - those were all before I got my name change, so they were looking at a boy name on their computer screens...

Everyone at the places I had to change my name in person asked whether it was a marriage or divorce.  I just smiled and said "neither, actually" and gave them the form.  Everyone at the places I was able to do over the phone asks for the name on the account, which was <boy name>, then immediately asks "Ok, and who am I speaking to now?"

When guys flirt with me and bump into things or drop their stuff walking by me. :P

Not getting called anything resembling a male pronoun since FFS.

Little girls sometimes talking to me like just any other girl.

I wish I didn't worry about passing at all, but I've only been full time everywhere for a little over a month so I don't have that assurance just yet.  Soon though if things keep going at this rate.

Well, on the phone I totally pass, thank god!

I can't order pizza using my male name anymore. If I say <male name> they go "what?" then I say again and they change it to a similiar but female name :P

I suppose there is always at least one aspect of our lives where we do pass.

Quote from: Maddie Secutura on August 06, 2011, 06:00:16 AM
Not even over the phone.  My student loans are still in my old name so whenever I had to call them up the situation took a little explaining.  I had to address something with the account and they said, "...And you're his...?"

Hahaha this reminds me of a similar situation I frequently have.  My student loans people call me at least once a month and ask for Van.  I say this is Van, and then they hang up on me.  It's happened at least 20 times.  I guess they anticipate a guy to answer, but I think Van can go either way.

I remember when I first started hormones, I went to the pharmacy to also get antibiotics, and the pharmacist yelled at me as I was leaving to "remember, if you are on birth control, these antibiotics will negate the effects of them."  That was the highlight of my passing to me, and ever since then I've never had any trouble.  I remember during the spring I got asked out by something like 8 different guys in a month... I was so happy that month =P  I said no of course, I'm terrified of accepting dates from guys because of my parts.
Now, it's not being referred to as female that gets me excited anymore, it's getting referred to as a younger age.  At the mall the other day I got called young lady and I was so happy... the woman clearly thought I was 18 or 19 and the older man I was with was my dad =)  I got asked out by an 18 year old boy a couple months ago, and I turned around and all I said was "i'm 26."  His jaw dropped and he apologized, saying he thought I was his age.  Those are the kind of comments that make me happy now =)

Quote from: Maiara on August 06, 2011, 10:57:23 AM
Well, on the phone I totally pass, thank god!

I can't order pizza using my male name anymore. If I say <male name> they go "what?" then I say again and they change it to a similiar but female name :P

I suppose there is always at least one aspect of our lives where we do pass.

for lucky girls  :D :D not all of us sweetie

I remember once at a train station I wanted to shave in the bath room on my way and I decided it would make the least fuss if I did so in the men's room, but the janitor kindly told me I was heading in the wrong direction even wearing stubbles and no makeup. "I am transgender - technically I believe I can choose?", I said leaving him very confused.

This week I went on an island camp, which is a primitive way to spent a holiday in touch with nature. To my surprise the place had only communal showers, but although a lot of people saw me naked they continued to treat me faultlessly as a lady. They just couldn't believe their eyes, they told me later.

In Denmark we have bio-sexed SSNs which give some funny situations at times. In one such situation I was asked to repeat my SSN three times before the officers said "That cannot be right, because then you were a man!" and I replied "You're right, WERE."

I have also been in a situation where the nurse - even after asking about my male SSN - questioned me if I were sure I couldn't be pregnant.

At another time after telling a coworker I am anatomically infertile she asked me if I had considered to receive in vitro fertilization.

During practical training as a nurse I told my coworkers I am transgendered to avoid unnecessary gossip. A few month later one of the nurses told me in detail how to pull back the foreskin when cleaning a male as if I didn't know. Apparently she had forgotten everything about my prehistory.

I had some strange experiences too. When I'm in boy mode I try to make sure people see me as male, because I don't want any awkward situations, but I guess I'm just not too good at it :D

I was at work in the men's room washing my hands, and a guy came in. He looked at me, and then he said: "Sorry, I thought this is the men's room" and he left as quickly as he could.

I travel by train a lot and sometimes people think I'm a girl. I really don't understand it because I mostly wear very manly baggy clothing.
I was sitting in a compartment alone minding my own business, when I heard a part of a conversation:" ... ask the young lady(me) if she is waiting for somebody..." and then they asked me if they can sit down in that compartment.

I needed some antifreeze for my car in the winter, so I headed down to the gas station. The shop assistant greeted me, "Good morning miss, how can I help you?" and I just froze for a second because I didn't expect it at all because I didn't even shave that morning.

I was talking with a friend on the street when a little dog ran up to me and wanted to play. The dog's owner arrived a few seconds later he apologized and told the dog: "The lady doesn't want to play with you". My friend just smiled and couldn't imagine how could he mistake me for a girl.
I know, that would have been the perfect coming out oppurtunity, but I'm a coward.

Oh Wow!
Some many fun responces. I just love reading them all.

The other day at the grocery store my wife and I were at the self check-out.
(I hate them and would rather go to a line with a cashier. But the lines were real long and my wife needed to get home.)
Anyway she was paying with a credit card and I began placing the items in the cart.
The women who helps out with the self check-out came up to use saying "Lady, lady, lady" I though she was talking to my wife but she went on to say, "don't put the items in the cart until they are paid for because it will mess up the machine."
She was talking to me. OMG! You could have knocked me over with a feather.
And I wasn't wearing makeup or female style clothing.
But I am just loving it. ;D
Jillieann

Quote from: Anne Caitlyn on August 06, 2011, 11:43:24 AM
I was at work in the men's room washing my hands, and a guy came in. He looked at me, and then he said: "Sorry, I thought this is the men's room" and he left as quickly as he could.

I remember one of those moments in the early 90's back when Houston still had The Summit (later the Compaq Center and now a church of some sort)...on HRT but pre-transition albeit with most of the electro done.  That was also back in the days where I was all of about 120lbs and had a 25-26 inch waist...so it was clearly a sum of the parts sort of deal for the guy who made the apology.  But those were the sorts of moments that pretty much said 'umm, yeah, its time to give notice at work.'

But as others note, once you get X number of years post-op under the belt, you rarely give things a second thought...now the closest thing I get to confusion is when people presume I am straight (an event that been occurring with annoying frequency over the past several months). 

Quote from: Ann Onymous on August 06, 2011, 02:25:57 PM
now the closest thing I get to confusion is when people presume I am straight. 

Hmmm... I'm straight but I felt a bit annoyed last time someone asked if I had a husband (which was strange because I'd have asked "are you married" instead), since usually people say I look quite young (people seldom even call me "ma'am")... not happy suddenly with someone seemingly assuming I'm now older! But she was an older woman and maybe she thinks girls of my age should be marrying already... I'm not even in a hurry to find a boyfriend yet (nor are my friends of the same age as me). So... I suppose that's something that says I pass (or she thought I was a gay male—highly doubtful, same-sex marriages are not recognized in this country), but not quite what I want to hear nonetheless!

When I was at the transgender day of remembrance with a bunch of other trans-people I didn't know - and one of the other people there thought I was just a lesbian there to support people and not trans. Passing even among other trans-people, felt very empowering.

Quote from: Samantharz on August 06, 2011, 03:24:51 PM
When I was at the transgender day of remembrance with a bunch of other trans-people I didn't know - and one of the other people there thought I was just a lesbian there to support people and not trans. Passing even among other trans-people, felt very empowering.

I had something like that, we had a meeting with the local gaypride organizers and they thought I was a girl :D It made me very happy.

Quote from: Anne Caitlyn on August 06, 2011, 03:54:46 PM
I had something like that, we had a meeting with the local gaypride organizers and they thought I was a girl :D It made me very happy.

i have never had a moment like that much be fun  :) :)

Quote from: VannaSiamese on August 06, 2011, 11:04:50 AM
Now, it's not being referred to as female that gets me excited anymore, it's getting referred to as a younger age.  At the mall the other day I got called young lady and I was so happy... the woman clearly thought I was 18 or 19 and the older man I was with was my dad =)  I got asked out by an 18 year old boy a couple months ago, and I turned around and all I said was "i'm 26."  His jaw dropped and he apologized, saying he thought I was his age.  Those are the kind of comments that make me happy now =)

Erm, mid 20's is not old and not unusual to be referred to as young lady....

I got referred to as young girl a few weeks back by an old lady. :o ;D

Doorman at a bar looks at my ID, at me, at my ID, checks me out, back to my ID... "So you're a guy?" That was my first "passing" moment, but like everyone, I'm way more critical of each and every little detail. I get ma'ams plenty at Walmart, trying or not. Tonight I was at Chevys with my mom and our waiter refered to us as, "ladies". I wasn't even close to trying, so I think he was either being very nice or too embarrassed to chance a reversal on the pronoun and be wrong on the flip. I really really need to work on my voice, particularly face to face with someone. I'd probably have it passing for six months and still think it's awful.

To me most of you are young ladies. ;D

I was in male clothing the other day shopping in the women's lingerie area and no one paid any attention to me.
Even though I was checking out bras. :)

Quote from: Jillieann on August 06, 2011, 08:33:49 PM
To me most of you are young ladies. ;D

I was in male clothing the other day shopping in the women's lingerie area and no one paid any attention to me.
Even though I was checking out bras. :)

That's normal though... I don't really think anything either when I see men checking out bras :)

That is wonderful Valerie.

I posted this somewhere else... but I'm so happy about this I am posting it again.

A friend of a friend saw me with my male white overcoat look at work a few days ago. I saw her chatting with my friend and now and then looking towards me, and I thought she was reading me.

My friend later on told me the person was asking her if I was a dyke :D

I had a check out girl at the register first said ma'am, then apologized oops sorry sir, then handed my credit card back and said thank you ma'am !!!!   :D weeee!

Quote from: Whitney on August 06, 2011, 08:26:29 PM
Doorman at a bar looks at my ID, at me, at my ID, checks me out, back to my ID... "So you're a guy?" That was my first "passing" moment, but like everyone, I'm way more critical of each and every little detail. I get ma'ams plenty at Walmart, trying or not. Tonight I was at Chevys with my mom and our waiter refered to us as, "ladies". I wasn't even close to trying, so I think he was either being very nice or too embarrassed to chance a reversal on the pronoun and be wrong on the flip. I really really need to work on my voice, particularly face to face with someone. I'd probably have it passing for six months and still think it's awful.

One time I had a bartender flat-out refuse service because he wouldn't accept that the ID was mine.

Back when I still had the old name on my ID I had to drop into my low voice and tell the bouncer, "It was a dare." 

I got in my car to go to the store and as I was leaving my daughter and one her friends were standing at the end of the driveway. After I came back my daughter came into the house with me. She said her friend asked her if I was her mom then she smiled at me and said does that make you feel better. I smiled back at her and said yes, it does thanks for telling me.

All of your stories are so inspiring with a dash of cuteness!  Especially the ones that include guys hitting on you.  I'm still presenting as a male in public (as androgynous as possible) and really can not go anywhere without being thought of as a girl or being called ladies or something.  However, something a little bit extra funny happened last week.  My friend and I were at Border's books to see if we could find anything we liked.  I went into the men's room and noticed that someone had followed me in.  It was a really small Asian girl.  She was probably 15 or 16.  I went into the stall and was peeking through a little space between the door and stall to see if she would notice it was the wrong bathroom.  She was looking in the mirror and applying makeup, and then I think she noticed something and left.  Then when I came out, my friend said to me "I just saw a girl leave the men's room and enter the woman's room."  I told her what happened, and then we both laughed and slapped five! 

Brilliant topic!
I had the girl at the supermarket make a remark to me, about an obnoxious male child screaming his head off, as just another female customer. :)

Zelda, I can't see you as anything other than female. I see no male-ness in your avatar at all. Have you considered going full time, because YOU TOTALLY SHOULD, YOU STONE COLD FOX!!!!!

Quote from: Zoë Natasha on August 05, 2011, 07:36:21 PM
Yet another store clerk ask (while looking at my license) "Is that your boyfriend?"  Me: "No..."  Her: "Your husband?"  Me: "No..."  Her: (30 seconds later) "OOOOOOH!!!"

Reminds me of standing in line at the airport to go through security. The TSA guy asked for my ticket, looked at it, and said, "You have your husband's ticket." Then he looked at the guy standing behind me in line, "Is this your husband?"

This just happened today and was one of the more "cool" things that's happened in a while...

Walked into Nordstrom with a friend... I needed a sunglass case for a pair of pretty expensive sunglasses... ask the sales guy if he has any hardshell cases to fit these glasses... he says wait a sec, walks to the back counter, looks in some drawers, then hands me a brand-new case... I ask him how much, he says don't worry, it's on me?!? WTF! I'm like no, I really should pay for it, he says he'll take care of it? So, I go thanks... (my friend and I are more worried about being stopped by security at this point, but luckily she was able to close her gaping mouth fast enough at this point and walk out with me)... as I'm leaving the store I opened the case, and the sales guy stuck his business card inside, and wrote "Call me and his # on the back"... This was one of the better things that's happened.

The guy was about my age and cute too. :D

Quote from: Samantharz on August 08, 2011, 07:50:30 AM
Zelda, I can't see you as anything other than female. I see no male-ness in your avatar at all. Have you considered going full time, because YOU TOTALLY SHOULD, YOU STONE COLD FOX!!!!!

I second this. I would expect all the boys to be buying you the drinks.

Wow Jennx.
That is wonderful.

I had a "men's washroom" experience too lol, so it was a year and half ago, I had med-length hair (for a boy), I was wearing a hoodie and tight jeans and a pair of converse, I was still presenting myself as male so naturally I went In the men's room, While I was just done washing my hands, a guy came in, he looked at me and he said "wooow is this the women's room!?!?!" I just ran out the washroom, and I had mixed feelings, on one hand I'm happy that someone thinks I'm a tomboy, on the other I was super embarrased... And I tried to avoid public washroom since then, I'd go to the one for disabled people if possible

As Maddie said, I really don't think about passing anymore because I do everywhere, but it still feels awesome and I notice. I pass over the phone too. When I called my retirement fund to change my name, the lady on the phone remarked "mam, there seems to be a mistake on our records. When you put in your name change, make sure to change it from Mr. to Ms." that was before I told her my new name so she was looking at my boy name and advising me.

I pass among transwomen and people who work with transwomen too. At least those people who don't know me from here. First time I went to a trans support meeting at the local lgbt center the moderator and her girlfriend couldn't tell if I was MTF, FTM or just someone there for support. My electrologist asked me why I grew hair on my face and if it was a family or hormonal trait. She works with many, many trans clients. I told her I was trans and she was flabbergasted.

The latest thing is I have a locker in the ladies here at work. We have private showers and I sometimes use them after work if I need to be somewhere local after work. Nobody looks at me funny even when I have wet hair and no makeup and I am wearing jeans and a top. Ladies versions, but not frilly. The other ladies also don't think anything of undressing in front of me. That to me is a stamp of acceptance. 

I must say though I don't get hit on by guys very much and I don't exactly project dyke. The local lesbians seem to think I'm pretty cute and accept me even knowing my history. I wore a bikini top the other day and got looked at a bit, but I have very few stories of men approaching me. It may be because I don't hang out in many non-queer places save for work and when I am out and about running errands etc. I dont often catch men looking at me. Sometimes that gets me a bit down to be honest and as weird as it may sound since I am a lesbian. I guess because a guy hitting on me means I don't just pass, but I am attractive. Female self-esteem issue I guess.

I was with my daughter and ex at a local family restaurant many years ago. I had transitioned back, trying to play the role of a good father when I needed to use the rest room.

I walked in and a guy at the urinal, stopped peeing and slipped himself back in to his pants and said...
"Mam, your in the wrong rest room!" He seemed soooo shocked  :)

A few days later, transitioned again, and have not looked back......

I went to get a prescription filled and they asked me to initial this form that I had been warned about taking this med if I was or was planning to become preggers  :P Honestly I can't recall the last time I was sir'd in public and the only people who ever slip with the pronouns are people I have known for years before I went full time. And then is usually only after we have been chatting for quite a while and it's just a slip. I know I am still the same person inside and they always know me as a he so that's gonna happen. Can't take that personally.

So many exciting responces.

I sometimes answer the phones in the early morning hours before the office people arrive.
What is very intresting is that my boss and friends don't recognize my voice.
They always ask if I am (male name). I have been working there for around 7 years.
Work just got a new phone system and phones that work great. They still don't recognize me.  :)
And no one has ever calls me sir unless I tell them I'm (male name)
As I said in another posting my has changed now that I am on hormones. It is slightly higher and softer.
Now bates an eye at me when Jillieann is out and talking. ;D

I took my son to the doctor with my wife. They asked which one of us was the parent.

It's late and I just went into the bathroom to wash my face before going to bed.
I jump back real quick after seeing an image in the bathroom when I knew my wife was asleep in bed.
It was a women. :o
Oh it was only me,   :embarrassed: my own reflection in the mirror. ;D

Jillean, you know you're passin when you trick yourself :)

Cuz nobody is a worse critic to themselves as a transsexual and her looks!

oh  Jillieann

you made it.  I'm getting there to!  So happy for you.

QuoteCuz nobody is a worse critic to themselves as a transsexual and her looks!

Yes I am my worse critic Alainaluvsu.

Marie thanks and I'm so glad your continuing on the journey of transitioning.
It is life for us. :)

That's great Sunynight. So must have been fun telling the doctor that your son had 2 mothers.  ;)

QuoteHonestly I can't recall the last time I was sir'd in public and the only people who ever slip with the pronouns are people I have known for years

Stephe isn't that the way of it. People who have know you before still see you as you were. :(
Oh and let me know if you get pregnant. ;D

Quote from: Jillieann on August 10, 2011, 08:41:00 PM

Stephe isn't that the way of it. People who have know you before still see you as you were. :(

I've learned to just accept it. I gently remind them and they are like "whoops" but some knew me for years and I understand it's hard not to see -me- and they knew -me- as a guy for a long time.

I think that getting "sir"'ed today when I went to pick up my very first suit was a good sign.  :D

Same with getting ground on by a frisky guy at the gay club last night!   >:-)

And I'm pre-T!  :D

These last few days since I went full time have been amazing.

No one who meets me calls me a sir, it is always a lady. Very few people are reading me, and it is getting less and less common.

I work as a med student so I have those white overalls, mine are still male since im not FT at work. Well, even if my teachers call me a sir, and say he, the patients often refer to me as a she anyway, even after hearing my male name.

I'm like... totally freaking passing even if I try to be a male, heck, even if people refer to me as a male most folks just don't buy it :D It is like a whole new life is opening itself to me. Honestly, this is completely unexpected and I see it as a blessing which I don't take for granted, but I'm happy to have received it and I hope to make the best out of it.

I think i just had my first "My eyes are up here!" moment  ;D

Oh Sianna,
That has got to feel great.
Yea!

Great Maiara.
Occasionally I have noticed, when me wife calles me "he", at a resturant, the waistress doesn't seem to hear her
Or maybe thinks she is seniel. Anyway they still call me ma or are careful not to use a gender.

EliNewGuy,
That is great!

   This young stock boy keeps flirting with me  ??? I've been a regular at this grocery store for awhile now and despite the fact that i always go dressed as male this stock boy who cant be any older then 19 keeps trying to start up conversations with me. It's kinda funny cuz im not trying to pass as female and he still hits on me.  :laugh:  I kinda feel bad cuz i see how nervous he is talking to me but at the same time i think it's kinda cute and i enjoy the attention.   :)


    Is this a sign to go full time?  :-\

Quote from: Forever21Chic on August 11, 2011, 09:58:20 PM

    Is this a sign to go full time?  :-\

Yes, it is.  :D

When I first met my friends cousin and her boyfriend they were pre-warned that one of the girls they would meet was going through transition (Me ofc) and by the end of the evening they thought it was my girlfriend... made me very happy and it is one of the things I remember when I am feeling low.

Thanks for reminding me of it!  ;D

this brings me to something funny, well basicaly i went to do my driver theory test last week and the guy asked to see my passport that was fine, he then asked me to see another form of ID so i showed him my student card, he then asked to see a 3rd picture id so i showed him my gym membership and for 5 mins he kept saying are u sure this is you?
he didn't think that i was the same person in them photo's it shows howmuch iv'e changed and i was in boy mode at the time as i didn't have my deed poll at the time but it's just funny to think howmuch my apperence has changed since last year i'm more like a fem boy, only way you can tell i'm in a boys body is the beard shadow, it's kidna pushing towards i'm fem even when not trying to be, but nobody ever questions me, everyone has always asumed i'm a gurl when i am not in boy mode, and just dressed as myself, i have too much confidence atm, when you pass like i am atm you feel yourself being more confident in who you are and it's a great feeling just to be called she or her or miss, it still gives me the goosebums everytime and i love it :) xx

QuoteIs this a sign to go full time?

QuoteYes, it is. 

I so agree with Sianna, Forever21Chic.
If you can't pass as a male then you must be a female full time anyway.

Quoteby the end of the evening they thought it was my girlfriend...

Wallflower that great.

QuoteLucy Nolan,
when you pass like i am atm you feel yourself being more confident in who you are and it's a great feeling just to be called she or her or miss, it still gives me the goosebums everytime and i love it xx

Me to hon. I such a great felling to be accepted as your true gender/self. I love it.

I got one that always sticks with me because its soo funny. Anyway i had endo appt and its a womens health clinic at a unversity hospital. the nurse called me back to get vitals and basics after asking all the standard questions she then asks " and when was your last menstrual period?" I was smiling all day after that.

Quote from: Forever21Chic on August 11, 2011, 09:58:20 PM

   This young stock boy keeps flirting with me  ??? I've been a regular at this grocery store for awhile now and despite the fact that i always go dressed as male this stock boy who cant be any older then 19 keeps trying to start up conversations with me. It's kinda funny cuz im not trying to pass as female and he still hits on me.  :laugh:  I kinda feel bad cuz i see how nervous he is talking to me but at the same time i think it's kinda cute and i enjoy the attention.   :)


    Is this a sign to go full time?  :-\

Forever21, if you often look the way you do in your profile pic (and that isn't just the 1 of 10 photos that looks good to you, as in my case), then yes, go full-time - you're what I would consider a cute girl and I wouldn't even think twice about you being cisgendered!  :O

Quote from: EliNewGuy on August 13, 2011, 08:20:58 PM
Forever21, if you often look the way you do in your profile pic (and that isn't just the 1 of 10 photos that looks good to you, as in my case), then yes, go full-time - you're what I would consider a cute girl and I wouldn't even think twice about you being cisgendered!  :O

  Awe thx u Eli that was sweet. Yeah my roomate keeps telling me to go full time & said she would not leave my side while out in public till i feel comfy, she is so awesome haha.  ;D

This afternoon I went to the park for a walk.
While I was by the beach watching the big waves I began reminiscing about other summer days when my boys were still at home.
We would often come down to the beach and play and laugh in the big waves just like these.
Anyway.
A girl, I believe she was 12 or 13, started call to me "lady in pink, lady in pink", I had a pink sleeveless top on.
I had noticed a women with her only a few seconds before who had just went into the bathhouse.
She began talking to me about the waves and we talked and then I told her about the fun my sons and I had at the beach many years ago.
Then she ask if I was going swimming or if not why I was there.
I told her that I was just out for a walk in the park.
I wished her a good day and was off for the rest of my walk in the park feeling good about having met the girl who chatted with this old women.  :)

I'm never in girl mode, but many times I will test out my voice in drive thrus of fast food restauraunts. I have never been sir'd when using my voice, and most of the time I'm maam'd. When maam'd, the girls seem so embarassed when they see I'm "male" and the guys (sensing their feelings thru their eyes) are like "weirdo". I also test it by playing WoW and jumping in guild vent channels and chatting it up. Nobody has yet to suspect that I'm male! I've made a few girl friends and received quite a few guys hitting on me, or using that playful voice that guys use when talking to a girl by testing out my voice. Makes me feel really confident to know that at least my voice is passing! :)

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on August 15, 2011, 07:46:32 PM
I'm never in girl mode, but many times I will test out my voice in drive thrus of fast food restauraunts. I have never been sir'd when using my voice, and most of the time I'm maam'd. When maam'd, the girls seem so embarassed when they see I'm "male" and the guys (sensing their feelings thru their eyes) are like "weirdo". I also test it by playing WoW and jumping in guild vent channels and chatting it up. Nobody has yet to suspect that I'm male! I've made a few girl friends and received quite a few guys hitting on me, or using that playful voice that guys use when talking to a girl by testing out my voice. Makes me feel really confident to know that at least my voice is passing! :)

     Haha yeah i also like to mess with guys at the Mcdonalds drive-thru. I have never played WoW but i do on occasion play online games and it's so funny how when guys hear a girl voice on vent they all try and talk at the same time.  :laugh: 

A few months ago a (female) friend and I were looking at some 20 year old videos of the band we both used to belong to (I'm still there, she isn't). She knew me back then but we weren't friends or anything. But she is aware of my transition. This was a video of a wedding and at one point all the band members were filing past the bride and groom shaking their hands, you know how it is. And I was going like "oh, there is Tom, here you remember Dick. That's Mary, Joane, Harry. And that's me, and behind me is Bob, you remember Bob?" (not real names of course). And she says: "wait, back up... That's YOU!? Wow your face has changed!".

So I guess my face has changed. I really don't see it. But it was a fun moment   :)

Back about 10 years ago, we had some kind of team building sports event through my employer at the time. By then I was post-op, but very insecure. So here I was in the women's locker room thinking all hell is going to break loose when they see me in there. I was sure I would be clocked as trans or something. Not even a peep or a glance. Everyone was just taking their showers and what not else. That was one of those "Gee, I guess I pass" moments.

EDIT: As for voice though, I hate telephones. Diabolical things. People are invariably asking my name twice to make sure they heard me correctly, because the female name they here doesn't match the voice.

As I was walking alone the beach I seen a man about my age sitting in a beach chair watching his grandson in the water.
As I approached them the man stood up took his baseball cap off and began talking to me.
I was weather talk but I loved it just the same.  :)

QuoteAs I approached them the man stood up took his baseball cap off and began talking to me.

I'd say passing.  Yea!

Today at "Meet the Teachers" night at my daughter's elementary school I played the "single dad" because my wife is a teacher at the same school and had to be in her room for her students. All of the teachers and faculty know my 6 year old and 21month old son like they are celebrities because of my wife but I kept getting strange looks and wasn't getting the normal courtesy "how have you been". I don't think most of them recognized me as it had been a year since I had seen some of them.

Later on I was sitting in my Wife's chair behind her desk with my son on my lap texting and my wife had to step out. A mother and grandmother came in with their kid and I heard them say, "Oh here is Mrs. Jameson's room".... I kept on texting until I heard her say, "Oh and there is Mrs. Jameson" walking over to me. I then looked up and she stopped and said, ah, ah, ah I don't know why I thought you were Mrs. Jameson.... I looked at her and said, nope, not yet........ lol

The day before I went to make a deposit at the bank drive though and the teller asked me if I needed anything else, "Ms. Jameson".

Both times I was wearing a male fishing shirt and had a couple of days beard shadow. I even caught myself thinking a picture of me was of my mom for a second. Perhaps it is the HRT, or just the crummy camera they put in the new iPads..... lol

-M

when some random lady at a diner recognizes my mom from about 20 years ago, glances at me, and then turns away looking insulted. then says "I thought you had two sons!?" "Two boys, no girl right?"

I think that you are passing when you feel comfortable with yourself and don't worry about passing anymore. For some reason, people notice people who are nervous. Just make sure you are dressed appropriately where you go. Dressing down is definitely the trend.

QuoteI think that you are passing when you feel comfortable with yourself and don't worry about passing anymore.

I so agree Cindy. But for me it is still enjoyable when people affirm that I am passing.

That's great FullMoon. You definitely passed.

QuoteI even caught myself thinking a picture of me was of my mom for a second.

Melissa, when I look in the mirror I often see or really notice the resemblance to my sister.
Oh yes. I would say your HRT is working.

Quote from: Jillieann on August 17, 2011, 04:47:28 PM
Melissa, when I look in the mirror I often see or really notice the resemblance to my sister.

I see that too... and given which sister it is, I wish I didn't. :icon_anger:  The most self-centered, egotistical, uncaring human being I've ever had the displeasure to meet.

Quote from: Jillieann on August 17, 2011, 04:47:28 PM

Melissa, when I look in the mirror I often see or really notice the resemblance to my sister.
Oh yes. I would say your HRT is working.

Well, it gets better. My wife went on vacation with the kids for a month and then I flew in for a week. When I got on top of her in bed she got a really strange look. After .......things were over..... she finally fessed up that she felt weird because I looked like my mom.

Then when I flew up again when my parents were there my mom freaked out because my hair is down to my neck instead of the military cut I had when she saw me at Christmas. Plus I had lost about 30lbs but the big unknown to her was the HRT and transitioning. She must have said about 20 times that week, "He looks like a girl......he looks like I used to...." Now the funny part to me is that it NEVER occurred to me in a million years that I would end up looking like my mom. It probably should have but it really wasn't what I was planning on. Well I guess there will be some additional surgery to correct that.

SIDEBAR: (not to take this thread in a different direction) In the above story I had planned on having one last summer vacation with my parents and family before I told them. I didn't want to say anything before or during the trip and have that additional layer on top of things. Well my wife was "feeling her out" and they started talking about my two lesbian cousins and my gay cousin (who I have never heard her say anything about) and she told my wife that she thinks it is wrong and that she wishes nobody had ever told her. Oops, well things just got complicated mommy because I'm not gay but I'm gonna be lesbian and ..... hmm, ok, I won't tell you but your sister knows, heck everyone knows, but we'll just let you ignore things at the Christmas dinner. Oh yea, and my budding B-Cups, that's just a really really pointy case of Gyno..... lol
-M

Quote from: Cindi Jones on August 17, 2011, 01:10:40 AM
For some reason, people notice people who are nervous.

There is so much truth to this. My mother and I took a vacation together, and at Montecello I clocked a transsexual female. I don't believe anybody else noticed, but I could tell because she talked really low, trying to hide her voice. She seemed really nervous. She would've passed so well otherwise, but she talked so closely to our guide, with a near whisper, and her nervous body language just put a spotlight on her to me.

Of course, for me to clock her may be an unfair advantage on my part to do so, because of who I am! lol ... she passed to my mom! (I didn't say anything to my mother about it afterwards.)

I get called "your mom" (teacher speaking to kid) by my kid's preschool teacher after I was introduced to her as her father. Figure that one out.

Quote from: EmmaM on August 17, 2011, 11:56:11 PM
I get called "your mom" (teacher speaking to kid) by my kid's preschool teacher after I was introduced to her as her father. Figure that one out.

Felt good didn't it?

Quote from: Marie Simone on August 18, 2011, 01:15:22 AM
Felt good didn't it?

For a split second. In reality it's kind of unnerving. I have to ask them why they're doing that. I don't need them being all weird if I have to give them a full name or present my ID in order to take my kid.

Am I saying passing is bad? Only at the outset of transition in very rare cases. I have to hurry up and change my ID photo.

Quote from: Zoë Natasha on August 17, 2011, 05:24:17 PM
I see that too... and given which sister it is, I wish I didn't. :icon_anger:  The most self-centered, egotistical, uncaring human being I've ever had the displeasure to meet.

OMG. Replace sister with mother and you have my story. Its weird to find yourself looking more and more like the person who did a great job at ruining your childhood...

Ugh, I'm jealous of all of you. 9 months later and I still don't pass.

Quote from: Jameve on August 18, 2011, 12:45:19 PM
Ugh, I'm jealous of all of you. 9 months later and I still don't pass.

It can take up to THREE YEARS to see the full effects of E

Quote from: regan on August 18, 2011, 12:47:21 PM
It can take up to THREE YEARS to see the full effects of E

I know I'll try to be patient, it's just that everyone has magical stories about how they pass after a few months such as in this topic.

Quote from: Zoë Natasha on August 17, 2011, 05:24:17 PM
I see that too... and given which sister it is, I wish I didn't. :icon_anger:  The most self-centered, egotistical, uncaring human being I've ever had the displeasure to meet.

You're not her though hun, so epic win for you.

I feel quite lucky in the fact I really look like my mum but nothing like the woman who gave birth to me (or anyone else from her familly)

Quote from: Jameve on August 18, 2011, 12:49:44 PM
I know I'll try to be patient, it's just that everyone has magical stories about how they pass after a few months such as in this topic.

"passing" is as much about the complete package and presentation as it is specific looks...as the saying goes, attitude is everything.  Those who may be very marginal in looks can often accomplish a lot with the right attitude...

Quote from: Maddie Secutura on August 05, 2011, 07:54:59 PM
When guys whistle at you when your out for a run.

"Ditto Maddie, when women take a dbl look, and are interested in what they see...can we say 'hall-lah-lu-yaH...!"  ;D

"I enjoy, most when females, hand me tha bill, and say 'Here you go sir...' some are a little hesitant, because I am very 'Metro' in appearance, and just say, 'Here you are...' but basically it is tha same for me, because I am still being accepted as what I should be accepted for...I love the 'Indecisiveness' of others...it's what keeps me going daily...!  ;D

When people don't immediately understand how you and your wife are BOTH the biological parents of your child.

"Wait, so there was a sperm donor?"
"Well kind of...um...he he...." Followed by a quick course in Trans 101.

Quote from: EmmaM on August 17, 2011, 11:56:11 PM
I get called "your mom" (teacher speaking to kid) by my kid's preschool teacher after I was introduced to her as her father. Figure that one out.

in this case, that's probably the only time hearing "your mom" is a good thing  :laugh:

I have been called miss or mam several times this week. My therapist asked me when I told her about it - "isn't that what you wanted?" My response-'YES but when I look in the mirror I don't always see her looking back.'

I must be doing something right-finally!

Randi

Hmm don't pass.

I did best voice on phone and there was total silence. I then tried again and man with deep voice said "Sir".  Wow I was talking female voice and guy still thought I was "Sir".

Did have a lady call me Mame at two feet and change it to Sir within two seconds.  I was androgynous mode.

Did go to checkout and this very pretty lady had a big grin and I was embarrassed.   Man loading groceries would not look at me.  No one addressed gender.  They knew I was different.  I was male mode.

Skilled surgeon on face might help.

Quote from: FullMoon19 on August 18, 2011, 05:54:16 PM
in this case, that's probably the only time hearing "your mom" is a good thing  :laugh:

Very true.

I find that I conduct my own demise when it comes to passing, I wear mostly athletic girl's clothing, and it comes off as very feminine male sometimes. I also see a girl in the mirror nowadays, after I'm done getting ready for the day. I try not to care much for what others say.

Passing is when people who live down the street from you, who talk to you semi-regularly, look you straight in the face and you don't register. Happened today.

Wow!
That great EmmaM.

Every little comment can help boost your confidence!

I think people calling my MtF girlfriend and me lesbians can be viewed as passing :D

When your university teacher says hi to you and kisses your cheek as a greeting, in front of other students who are struggling to see you as a woman.

When you go to a party full of people you don't know, and the girls you don't even know call you over for a picture with all the girls. ;D

When a lady you have worked with for years as male tells you "See ya later, Girl" then gets embarrassed at her slip. I haven't said anything about it to her yet but perhaps I should. She would be the fourth person here at work who I have told.

Since I got my ears pierced I can see the girl looking back at me from the mirror much easier than before. Today I'm wearing ladies jeans, sneakers, socks, sports bra and a mans shirt.

Randi

Way to go Randi.

Quote from: Anne Caitlyn on August 22, 2011, 11:02:55 AM
I think people calling my MtF girlfriend and me lesbians can be viewed as passing :D

Haha. But they call you lesbians like calling names? Or what?

Quote from: marelivki on August 27, 2011, 04:12:44 AM
Haha. But they call you lesbians like calling names? Or what?

It wasn't anything bad, just heard some comments like "wow, lesbians". For the first time in our lives we were quite happy to be called gay :D

Bet you were, but what's shocking in seeing a gay women couple these days? =D

Well here's a sign that I'm passing. I get off of work, go to the locker room and change, come back out, and a guy starts hitting on me. Not even discreetly. Lots of compliments, it was obvious he just wanted to get in my pants :icon_no: But it was still flattering.

   When your nephews say "Aunt Jamie you remind me of mommy" then they both gave me a hugg. I started to cry when they said that.  :'(

Quote from: Samantharz on August 27, 2011, 10:14:32 AM
Well here's a sign that I'm passing. I get off of work, go to the locker room and change, come back out, and a guy starts hitting on me. Not even discreetly. Lots of compliments, it was obvious he just wanted to get in my pants :icon_no: But it was still flattering.

Why are you "icon no"? That's how the life works, you have to come to terms with that. It's very nice that you are getting compliments!

Quote from: Forever21Chic on August 27, 2011, 04:52:47 PM
   When your nephews say "Aunt Jamie you remind me of mommy" then they both gave me a hugg. I started to cry when they said that.  :'(

Sweet babies! <3

I did the "no" smiley, because he's not getting into my pants. I don't really need life lessons  :P :eusa_doh:

I stuck around, knowing that he wanted nothing more than sex, just so that could hear his compliments. Perhaps a little bit evil of me, huh? The guy is just looking to get lucky, and isn't very subtle about it.

Quote from: marelivki on August 27, 2011, 09:46:11 AM
Bet you were, but what's shocking in seeing a gay women couple these days? =D

We live in Hungary, it's like living in the dark ages. That was in our capital city where people are somewhat used to things like that. Anywhere else and probably we would have heard some nasty comments.

The whole day was incredible, we were en femme all day, walking in the city, going to a restaurant, watching the August 20th(Saint Stephen's day) fireworks, using public transport, and we didn't have any problems. After the fireworks we went to a gay bar and spent the night there chilling out and at dawn we headed to the train station so we could get home. I will remember that day all my life.

Quote from: Zoë Natasha on August 22, 2011, 02:53:16 PM
When you go to a party full of people you don't know, and the girls you don't even know call you over for a picture with all the girls. ;D

Well said Zoe....  ;)

These stories are fun :)

I have gone out as a gal and no one really seems to notice/care. I do get strange and hard to interpret looks.
I can't really keep it up because I have a terrible beard shadow, so I defaulted to boy mode for a while.

What is really interesting though is the bunch of stuff that happens even with a beard:

They forgot to add a burrito to my order ob a drive thru and I as I was leaving she shouted mam! sir! mam! haha the confusion (it was dark I guess)

I get these extremely long strange stares at the restrooms- I avoid them now. (the mens room that is)

And then the really awesome ones where guys dash in front of me to open the door and smile.

My favorite one- when I was going to meet my girlfriend at college she said she had a hard time finding me- Because I looked like any ordinary girl :) (only situation when I enjoy being normal)

Oh and buying alcohol can be a hassle. I showed the clerk my id he looked at me looked at the card and just laughed. He didnt believe me one bit, but he sold it to me("our secret" kind of thing) He really thought I was underage.

To me these never get old. It just feels awesome that people see who I really am. I congratulate everyone on their passing experiences.

Ugh, the long stares in the restroom  :(

The door opening thing is nice, though.  I went out yesterday with a girl's t-shirt and jeans and my bra on (which is slightly padded so it helps).  A really cute teen guy had just come into the store (JCPenney) as I was heading to leave the store, and he went backwards to the door and opened it for me and then made a cute joke about the door always hitting him when he opens it.  It felt nice  :)

When some guy rushes out of his seat to help you carry a computer into the store. ;D  Wouldn't have thought twice about it if it was an employee, but it was another customer.

I still bruised from carrying it a very short distance though.  And this is what the bruises look like after four days!

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.theforestatnight.com%2Fsusans%2Fbruises.jpg&hash=69f83952f6b72c6eb3c1fbffa6c5470559ab8a03)

I've had a few bad experiences so have stopped going outside as a woman until I can pass better but the first time I went out was unbelievable. . . . I went to get into a taxi after a train journey & the driver said I could sit in the front seat, the penny didn't drop that i'd passed until we were driving down the road & I realised that he was checking out my legs, I still wasn't 100% sure i'd passed until he gave me my change & I forgot to alter my voice, the look on his face was priceless!

I then went into a shop & the woman called me miss, oh what a happy day

   When cisgender women give you dirty looks.  :D

for me its mostly what a lot of you have mentioned too like the license, restroom etc

its not a sign but. one time we went to a restaurant and this was a bit early on. the waiter addressed me as miss. on the way back i was telling my stepdad that i was so amazed and surprised that he thought i was a girl. i said, i look like ->-bleeped-<- how the hell did that happen. he said to me, 'he thought you were a woman, not a beautiful woman'.

i guess sometimes we get to think to look like a woman we have to look like those hot chicks we see here and there or the image we want to be like. but maybe, the standards to looking like a woman may be lower than what we think.

some natural for example, look like men. and my friend told me too joking, "women without makeup, do look like men".

Quotei guess sometimes we get to think to look like a woman we have to look like those hot chicks we see here and there or the image we want to be like. but maybe, the standards to looking like a woman may be lower than what we think.

I sure hope so cause I am certainly not a hot chick.  ;)
And I seem to pass. :)

When your therapist asks what kind of makeup you have on when you arent wearing any.

When your male name is called out and people look right past you in search of that guy...

Quote from: Randi on September 01, 2011, 06:34:52 PM
When your therapist asks what kind of makeup you have on when you aren't wearing any.

Ditto, with my father. He said he liked the way I had done my eyes. I hadn't done a thing to my eyes.

thats great =)

Nothing like one of these moments to cheer you up.

This happened last year during college. I had been on hormones for about 6 months and I was still living part time in an androgynous phase and I used the men's room because I didn't really care.

(In the men's room washing hands in jeans and a tee shirt)
(Guy walks in)
Guy: (as I glance over at him) Oh sorry, wrong bathroom!
(He gets out as fast as possible)
(Finish washing up and get out of there)
(Lmao as I walk away)

Went with my ex today as she tried on her wedding dress so that I could help with colors and accessories and whatnot.  Her soon-to-be mother-in-law was also there and my ex made no mention to her of who I was.  I sat and talked with the soon-to-be for a good hour in the bridal department at Nordstrom's and never once got the faintest hint that she had read me.  The best part is?  She's a speech therapist by profession. ;D

And it wasn't just her!  There were three other women trying on dresses, the two women working in there, and the lady in charge of alterations.  The nine of us talked the entire time about everything imaginable.  What a great afternoon!

Signs that you are PASSING. Yea!

Ok i am driving down a two lane highway. The road is clear except for the guy in front of me. He seems to be looking in his rear view mirror. Not because i am too close but because he is just one of those overly observant drivers. Then i see my chance and i go for it. I drive by him and he looks over at me and i smile as i go by at 45 mph with the speed limit being 50mph. I see he has a smile too. Their are signs anouncing that this is a passing zone. I just passed him and he smiled at me Yeaa i am passing  ;D

Then another car ahead and i get another chance to pass  >:-)

one of my sisters friends looked puzzled when looking at me the other night, it's was more a look of is that a girl or what, she then commented on how lovely my eyebrows were. i was in guy mode at the time because i was at my parents lol

Quote from: Forever21Chic on August 31, 2011, 03:53:42 PM

   When cisgender women give you dirty looks.  :D

it's not really like that for me. i actually get smiles from them when i didn't before. probably the only women that actually do that are just the very jealous you know what types. those are the kind of women i find out i hate as much as the alpha male types.

Yes, I usually get smile too but often after the women look me over from head to toe.
So I guess it is a sign of passing.  :)

My sisters friend came into my room once and said "OMG you have the perfect model's body! ......Can we dress you up?"

Admittedly, this was before I tried to pass and before any sort of gender issues hit me so I laughed it off. But hey, when I look back on it, it kinda makes me feel really good haha. ;)

O.K.  I put on a hat and earrings and went shopping away from where I live because I am not out.  It was nice.  People were nice.  I decided to get gas at self serve for auto near my house.  A young man put pump into my car and said, "Mame pump is ready for you."  I thanked him softly because I feel uncomfortable with voice thing.

Went to drug store and young lady was very nice and my credit card would not swipe.  I have my male picture on back of card and lady needed to manually swipe.  She remained very nice and then said, "Happy Birthday." 

It made me happy. It was my first day to shop dressed as a female.  When I dress androgynous (masculine female clothes) I get called Sir.  When I dressed feminine I got called Mame or got no reference to gender.  I think people were being nice.  I might pass if I do not talk.

My signs are just not getting clocked, which I have not gotten.  What I think is hilarious is when I try to tell some guy who is hitting on me that I'm transsexual, he thinks I'm lying or just making up an excuse to not flirt with him back.  It's like... why would I lie about something like that? Lol.

Quote from: Zoë Natasha on September 04, 2011, 06:31:15 PM
Went with my ex today as she tried on her wedding dress so that I could help with colors and accessories and whatnot.  Her soon-to-be mother-in-law was also there and my ex made no mention to her of who I was.  I sat and talked with the soon-to-be for a good hour in the bridal department at Nordstrom's and never once got the faintest hint that she had read me.  The best part is?  She's a speech therapist by profession. ;D

And it wasn't just her!  There were three other women trying on dresses, the two women working in there, and the lady in charge of alterations.  The nine of us talked the entire time about everything imaginable.  What a great afternoon!

Zöe, the speech therapist and the other women didn't clock you because you look completely feminine, and your female voice is great... and I mean stellar! You should be proud  of accomplishing that, most people never do. And it makes a HUGE difference in passing, because even if a person doesn't look particularly feminine facially (not that you have this problem.. you look very feminine, like an ex girlfriend of mine actually), if you open your mouth and you sound like a woman, that's the deciding factor.

I'd say voice is over 50% of passing, maybe 60-70% even. It's one of the most important things, and also one of the things people are least successful in mastering. Be proud of what you've accomplished.  :)

Veronika

I just had my first experience with people not accepting me as the person who is on my ID.

I had forgot the password for a credit card and had to change it, thus I went to the bank. The people there didn't regonize me from my driver license or ID card and refused to believe I was once a male. I nearly had to call it quits and go change my pictures before changing the card's pass. In the end, they settled for me signing a declaration that I had changed my appearance and it was not possible to regonize me visually due to a old picture. I wans't even dressed up or anything, it was raining actually.

:D

I take this as a huge compliment and a sign that my transition is going well!

then it must b really easy to get ur name changed in court.

Court workers whisper about you for 5 minutes after confirming you are who you legally are. Case workers lose their cool, and don't know how to talk to you. Employers want you to declare, on a paper, which gender you will be working as...

RLE. Adventure!

I went to the drug store to get my monthly meds. The clerk, as I bought my stuff, asked casually if I needed birth control pills :)

At lunch time in full male attire I handed the employee, taking our order, a $20 to pay for our meals.
And the female employee  turned to her manager and asked for change to give to the lady.
OMG she meant me. ;D
Loved it.

Some voice passes:

Getting ma'amd at the drive through based on only my voice.

Calling for school or bank records that have my male name and being asked if I'm a spouse.

I've practiced recording my voice and listening to it.  It is "O.K.".

Phone rang and caller ID said unknown caller.  I wondered if I could do it.

I answered with a female voice and caller asked to speak to man of house and gave my male name.  I said, "He was not home."

She then asked if I was lady of house.  I said, "No I am housekeeper.  Can I take a message for them?"

I think I passed on phone.

People give me weird extended stares if i try to pass as a boy

I had this photo up on a gay dating site 2 years ago. One guy asked me, "Are you a transman?"
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fa6.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net%2Fhphotos-ak-snc6%2F196969_196523010370332_100000379048523_580981_2964868_n.jpg&hash=277477cb56bc676cfd1e9659467e1243789cd1c3)