Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I wanna know if there are some girls here that strive to become the female ideal? you know thin, big breasts, curvy body? im just curious to know if there are somethings you want that arent really in your reach. I ask this because i have a tg friend who is pretty passable but not going to become a super model or something soon. I myself am a little big and curvy i would even consider myself a plus size woman but i never even though of becoming the "ideal" what is your opinion of this as transwomen?

Quote from: Marta on August 24, 2011, 02:38:36 AM
I wanna know if there are some girls here that strive to become the female ideal? you know thin, big breasts, curvy body? im just curious to know if there are somethings you want that arent really in your reach. I ask this because i have a tg friend who is pretty passable but not going to become a super model or something soon. I myself am a little big and curvy i would even consider myself a plus size woman but i never even though of becoming the "ideal" what is your opinion of this as transwomen?

  *Sigh* yes of course lol  ::)  but as a transwoman you have to be realistic, unless you start hormones very early like at puberty lvl then becoming that "ideal" woman is limited at best. 

Hmm, I never cared for the "ideal" body.
Having the right face is something I can't let go of though /vainvainvain
I'd actually like to become a bit more chunky.
I think it's cute (:

Plus, fat = boobs
amirite?

I do want to look ideal. But I think have a different picture from the Western ideas of what's ideal.
In my mind, being ideal means to look cute and lovable :D and cute Asian girls don't have big boobs...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg803.imageshack.us%2Fimg803%2F5001%2Fakiwanpimonogatari2.png&hash=27ebcb094990c14a1519c6111a82b0d6830e8e29)


They are still thin though! And I am overweight and trying to lose some weight. But I don't want to look THAT thin either.

Sometimes I am in the mood to look a bit sexier. But mostly I just try to make myself look cute, and I feel very happy looking cute :) (and have everyone call me "honey" and "darling" and stuff)

Quote from: Forever21Chic on August 24, 2011, 03:19:59 AM
  *Sigh* yes of course lol  ::)  but as a woman you have to be realistic

Sorry, couldn't resist ;)

What exactly is the ideal female body? The answer really depends on what is fashionable at the time, though currently the ideal female body (if you look at supermodels) is for highly androgenous and tall females with boyish hips, broader shoulders and small breasts. Which is actually what most trans women end up looking like really...I know I've been compared to a number of rather pretty super models (they were obviously blind, mad or both), so in terms of the current ideal of femininity, trans women measure up well.

However, there exists in the trans comunity a different ideal and if i'm honest it'd quite old fashioned, it's very similar to the victorian ideal, large bust, small wasp waist and big hips, and i think lots of girls torture themselves pointlessly over this, when in truth that classic hourglass figure is not actually that common a shape in women and if you go to the victorian ideal a lot of women did serious damage to themselves to make sure they fitted that ideal. tightlaced corsets do actually cause damage if worn for long periods of time, especially if you push things.

I want to be the ideal partner :) So all areas... from the subtle balance of emotional dependency to being physically attractive and available. The problem is a lot of times I don't feel I live up to the expectations I have for myself...so I stop seeing the person I am dating...or I simply don't look for someone to date. Blah :P

Quote from: Gravity's Child on August 24, 2011, 04:50:15 AM
Sorry, couldn't resist ;)

What exactly is the ideal female body? The answer really depends on what is fashionable at the time, though currently the ideal female body (if you look at supermodels) is for highly androgenous and tall females with boyish hips, broader shoulders and small breasts. Which is actually what most trans women end up looking like really...I know I've been compared to a number of rather pretty super models (they were obviously blind, mad or both), so in terms of the current ideal of femininity, trans women measure up well.

However, there exists in the trans comunity a different ideal and if i'm honest it'd quite old fashioned, it's very similar to the victorian ideal, large bust, small wasp waist and big hips, and i think lots of girls torture themselves pointlessly over this, when in truth that classic hourglass figure is not actually that common a shape in women and if you go to the victorian ideal a lot of women did serious damage to themselves to make sure they fitted that ideal. tightlaced corsets do actually cause damage if worn for long periods of time, especially if you push things.

You're correct, not everyone has the same view of what the "ideal" female is. I guess in this case im going more towards the western view of "beauty". Of course everything is simply an opinion- i dont view the western ideal of beauty seriously or any ideal of beauty because everyone is different. In western culture i think sometimes its even pathetic what some people (mostly women) will do just to meet some sort of made up criteria that dictates that you look good and a lot of times they arent even happy with that.

Quote from: Joeyboo~ :3 on August 24, 2011, 03:28:55 AM
Hmm, I never cared for the "ideal" body.
Having the right face is something I can't let go of though /vainvainvain
I'd actually like to become a bit more chunky.
I think it's cute (:

Plus, fat = boobs
amirite?

Actually i agree with you on that, id rather have a pretty face over anything else. You're face is after all the first part of you that everyone sees. I also dont chase or care for the "perfect body" but i do try my best to stay healthy and i think that's what matters the most as far as the body goes.

Quote from: Joeyboo~ :3 on August 24, 2011, 03:28:55 AM
...
Plus, fat = boobs
...

Sorry, Joeyboo~, but this is not necessarily true.  I fell for that trap and now I have a belly.  And my boobs only got bigger because of tissue development.  It only works if you already have female distribution pattern.  If you have a male pattern, it will always go there first.

I am one of those that does pursue the ideal look and shape. I suppose I'm a victim of American media. I specifically care more when I see girls who match that ideal pass by me! All I can think is "Damn, why can't I have that shape or be that small or pretty or have boobs that nice! etc etc etc." It never ends and sometimes it is exhausting but I can't help it. It's like they're the switches and i'm the light bulb.
I've always been obsessed with being smaller, even before I identified myself as trans. Ever since I was a teen, I did everything I could to be thinner and smaller and more feminine in structure.


I hope one day I find myself satisfied with how I look.

Quote from: Marta on August 24, 2011, 02:38:36 AM
im just curious to know if there are somethings you want that arent really in your reach. I ask this because i have a tg friend who is pretty passable but not going to become a super model or something soon.

Of course I would love to live a body that is me instead of this... (no polite term found) but I can accept that I'm not going to be any kind of model/performer/celebrity/whatever in this life. Some bodies just aren't that attractive, it is a fact of life. As long as I can get respect and dignity (which can be quite difficult for one born with this condition) then I don't really care about an attractive, sexy physical appearance. I'm an engineer not an actor, I don't need a body that looks good in a swimsuit. Would be nice sure, but not required.

And yeah it is true that not everyone has the same idea of what "the ideal" is. My own ideas on that would be another whole post and I sense that that would be tangential to the intended subject here so I haven't gone into it.

When I was younger, I used to fantasize about being this sexy woman with huge boobs, an ultra-thin waist, a nice butt...Basically, I wanted to be the ideal female that only wanted to be a housewife and please her husband. Now, I think that life would be exceedingly dull and pretty insulting to a person of my intelligence and potential.

Now, I'd really be happy having any-sized breasts (though I would prefer B or even C), a decent face, decent hair, and a healthy weight, though I would love to be able to look great and sexy. The point is I can live happily without that. I don't think those things are too far out of my reach. I want to be what I think is ideal, not what's ideal as a whole, and my version of ideal doesn't have huge expectations.

I'd rather be short, cute and have breasts in proportion with my body. Than the "ideal" tall, skinny, massive breasts super model.

Cute > Sexy :3

It's worth pointing out that if you discussed the same issue on a messageboard used by regular everyday women of all ages, they would have EXACTLY the same sorts of hopes, anxieties and fantasies about achieving the ideal female form ... because it's really no easier for them. And believe me, plenty of cis-girls really envy trans ones for having those long legs and slim butts that Gravity's Child was talking about.

The truth is, the "female ideal" is constantly changing and alway unattainable ... which is what it has to be, or cosmetics companies, fashion houses, shoe designers, plastic surgeons, diet-peddlars and the whole massive industry based on exploiting female insecurity, vanity and longing to be pretty would go straight down the pan ...

Quote from: Nurse With Wound on August 24, 2011, 10:33:13 AM
I'd rather be short, cute and have breasts in proportion with my body. Than the "ideal" tall, skinny, massive breasts super model.

Cute > Sexy :3

Cute is sexy, and I think tall is a bit overrated. Also, although many Americans are fat these days, truly skinny is a bad thing too, and a medical problem in its own right.

Even teenage girls will have their ideals and idols.  True, they are genetically female and have their life ahead of them so dreams may just become reality.  However often the ideal woman is only 3% of the entire female population.  The chances of attaining that is very slim.

Despite this I think dreams are a good thing.  I have an ideal and I know as a trans woman it is almost totally unobtainable.  But it has made me rejoin the gym, I have lost 22 lbs and 3" from my waist.  I eat well and take my vitamins and generally look after myself.  That alone can make you feel better about yourself :)

Anyway as we are on the subject of ideals
here is mine.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm7.static.flickr.com%2F6201%2F6077521666_2b6e2aaca7.jpg&hash=bf5454a9c9a6fea274a5354bb1705a8d908ff3b0)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffarm7.static.flickr.com%2F6204%2F6076985245_75b017d4b5.jpg&hash=f91a850759e4581ca6e4ddaed184a5d5616ee140)

this is Doutzen Kroes.  Just perfection :-*

Quote from: Joeyboo~ :3 on August 24, 2011, 03:28:55 AM
Plus, fat = boobs
amirite?

if my current dating partner is any indication, then the answer would be an emphatic NO.  She wears a size ) in jeans but has a natural D-cup. 

She does not exactly help my body image issues considering that I generally feel I am in decent shape...but I never was smaller than a juniors size 3 at my tiniest...and I am working on getting back to a 6. 

I definitely do, though I don't want big breasts. Just normal. I want to be beautiful though. Radiant, whatever you want to call it  :)

I think it is especially hard because while waiting to start HRT you spend so long in limbo knowing what you want but not knowing how close your genetics will get you. So you keep wondering how you'll turn out. And then when you see a girl and think "she's so pretty" and get kind of jealous you start to wonder if you could ever be like that. And then all you see are all your flaws because you feel flawed to begin with.

It's kind of like with voice, I want to be able to sing really beautifully but I just have to accept that there is an extra level of difficulty there for me as opposed to a cis girl, so I can never be as good as I could have been if I were born female.

Quote from: pretty on August 24, 2011, 10:30:23 PM
It's kind of like with voice, I want to be able to sing really beautifully but I just have to accept that there is an extra level of difficulty there for me as opposed to a cis girl, so I can never be as good as I could have been if I were born female.

That's my #1 desire right there... believe it or not, I'm more dysphoric about my singing voice than just about anything else.

The short answer is yes. I do strive for that image, to an extent. I want it, because I want to be attractive to the general population, but I also feel that I've achieved a satisfactory enough level of that, so much so that I don't feel the compelling need to attain it further.

The only thing I'd REALLY change about my body is to lose a bit of weight. I don't feel that anything is very masculine on my body, with the exception of some very minor body hair.

I may like to lower my hairline (shorten my forehead), but it doesn't seem to keep me from passing with the way it is currently.

Uhm... let's see.  I'd like longer legs and a shorter torso. While I'm at it, I'd like smaller boobs. I would like to have a few inches shaved off my shoulders. I look like a tennis player.  What else?  Oh a longer neck and a smaller shoe size or two. Oh.. and my head is too big.

Nah. I am who I am. I'm just lucky to have a life that I love.  When I see a woman of incredible beauty, I just tell my hubby that I could be lesbian for her. He usually responds with something like "Stand in line behind me!" or "That makes two of us!"

We all have talents and beauty is the most sought after. It is sort of odd how that is so universal.

Hi,

    Cindi,

   what is the ideal  . when we find or see it , will we know.

Do we really know .  id say not,   because we are all different we dont see the same things .

& even then would we really be happy with.... the ....ideal....

Im not even going to try & answer that..........

...noeleena...

An Ideal, for me is just that, an ideal not a reality.  It can give us a target to aim for if there is something we are not happy with, but shouldn't lose sight of the fact that we will never attain it.  Near enough should be good enough in this case.

Personally my ideal body is one like Xena, the Warrior Princess.  I am never going to lose my broad shoulders, so I will embrace that, and aim at being reasonably physically fit rather than a stick insect.

Karen.

If you strive toward an "ideal" you will always be disappointed. I forget the origin of this quote, but it applies well to  this: if you try to be someone else, you'll always be second rate, but you can be a first rate version of yourself. There's nothing wrong with role/appearance models, but it works best if  you're simply taking a idea here and a idea there as they fit your unique appearance/situation. Whether we like it or not we're all unique.

personally i had thoughts that if i wasnt pretty or passable i wouldnt be able to survive. I was thinking i was gonna need thousands of dollars of surgery to pass. I think i got pretty lucky, im very short and small but i wish i was taller and my boobs are having trouble getting past an A cup. we all wish we were better i guess. :o oh and im so small i barely have hips . :(

Of course I aspire to the ideal, the ideal Renate!

She's walking around in sneakers with her guitar on her back and a smile for everyone. :D

To me, ideal is being curvy. I have no desire to break in half when being hugged. ;)

Marta, i think your a good example of someone i would love to look like. I think your gorgeous and that's just speaking of your face :)

Quote from: Marta on August 24, 2011, 02:38:36 AM
I wanna know if there are some girls here that strive to become the female ideal? you know thin, big breasts, curvy body? im just curious to know if there are somethings you want that arent really in your reach. I ask this because i have a tg friend who is pretty passable but not going to become a super model or something soon. I myself am a little big and curvy i would even consider myself a plus size woman but i never even though of becoming the "ideal" what is your opinion of this as transwomen?

Wanna know what I'd LIKE to look like? Run an image search on Anzu Mazaki, Tifa Lockheart, or Sailor Jupiter. You'll get an idea of the list of traits I'd consider ideal. Is an appearance like this within my grasp? Well...why do you think my username is Sailor_Saturn instead of Jupiter? :P

Quote from: angelfaced on October 19, 2011, 12:34:48 PM
personally i had thoughts that if i wasnt pretty or passable i wouldnt be able to survive. I was thinking i was gonna need thousands of dollars of surgery to pass. I think i got pretty lucky, im very short and small but i wish i was taller and my boobs are having trouble getting past an A cup. we all wish we were better i guess. :o oh and im so small i barely have hips . :(

I think this is the stage that I'm at in my transition.

My preference would be to be a drop-dead stunning beauty a la 50's style noir films. (You know, those starlets they used to call 'handsome?') However, I recognize that I can never ever be that svelt.

In terms of every day life, I feel like having to pass places me in competition with gg girls (I guess there's a quota on Female i.ds or something.) so I have to out compete them in attractiveness and femininity.

Does this feeling eventually pass? Or am I destined to make snarky comments about other women from across the quad?