Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi, I have organized my first therapy session ever  :) (still over 6weeks away because of the waiting list for my preferred therapist)

My question is when did you come out to your family/friends, etc. ? Was it before you started therapy? before you started hrt? etc.
If it was after therapy or starting hrt how long was it until you told family/friends?

Miss X

Yeah I did it after I'd been self medding for 3 months or so whats more is I was moving between home and university so the changes wern't gradual they were acute and punctuated.

at first it's all like.
"Are you ill... Do you have the flu? Your all pale thin and skinny and your voice is scratchier than usual."

It becomes a different ball game when pepole start noticing "bumps" on your chest. eventually I had to explain things to pepole.

I came out to my kids when I started therapy and transition about 18 months ago, (my wife and I were separated, now divorced), and my mother, brothers, and their families about a year ago.

I had things worked out nicely, but forgot about Chaos Theory and Murphy's Law!

I basically had to out myself and go full-time about 5 months ago, when the Birth Certificate with my new name arrived in the mail in a week instead of after at least four.
There wasn't much point presenting as a bloke when I fronted up to VicRoads to change the name on my Driver's Licence to Karen!

Since then everyone has been great, and I have had virtually total acceptance, which was a relief given all my fears.

Karen.

I came out to one close friend (pretty much no chance of rejection) and my younger sister (who i am very close with and there was no risk of any type of rejection) as I was considering things... I kind of bounced the idea off of them as I was exploring.

After that, I didn't tell anyone until I was about 2 months into hormones :) Then I started coming out to another friend and some other family members.... and continue to come out to people slowly as I feel comfortable.

I came out to my girlfriend the day I realized who I really am. (That was in June.) She's still with me. =]

I came out to my dad 9 days ago and my mom a week ago. They were cool. (See my blog at https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,383.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,383.0.html))

I finally found a therapist in my area (45 minutes away is the closest I could find) and hopefully I'll be starting sessions soon. No HRT yet. Hopefully ASAP! :)

Edit: I've been slowly coming out to friends throughout all of this. And I came out to my sister probably a week or so after my girlfriend. =]

As an adult? When I was about 22 to my best friend and business partner of the time, he liked trans people so it was heavier for me than him. As a child back in the UK came out to the school nurse at 8 but as I wrote elsewhere here, it caused me a huge amount of trouble.

When my Mom discovered my hormones and confronted me.

Just over a year ago, when I finally accepted that I had to transition.. I started with my mum..

My Mom had to accept the fact that I was gay in 2000...then having to accept me as trans now. It took her awhile, I still have to remind her to call me my name around strangers and not to use the boy pronouns.

I think she saw the acceptance of people at work and it changed her. Of course, she's an old lesbian... there was always tension before because I was over the top, flamboyant gay and a typical self centered male. But as a female, I am more caring and compassionate.

So I think because I was her only child, she had to accept the rebirth of her son into her daughter. Ultimately more things had lined up in the past few months with her health...she wants to see me happy. Just we work at the same place, and I haven't been into work lately. It's a seasonal job with selective staffing. Thats caused some issues, since I've been transitioning 3+ years and I need to do my legal name change, learn how to drive, etc. Stuff that should have been taken of now. That is what she regrets.

I first came out to a friend 25 years ago - then went firmly back into the closet until last summer. Since then, everyone knows :). Oh, well, apart from my landlords, and I'll probably need to clue them in soon, as I've started wearing more obviously female clothes and changing my hair. But I'm fairly androgyne in my presentation anyway.

I'm currently looking for work, and I have a "helping you get a job" interview next week with the DWP over here, and will be saying to them "Any suggestions about finding work whilst transitioning?" and watch them go gulp... ;D.

So far, only one old friend has freaked out in a bad way, and that's been painful - but everyone else I've told has been amazing, including my brother. My parents are out of the picture, so I don't have to worry about what they think (I'm sure my dad, who is an everything-phobe, would be awful, but we don't talk any more so who cares :)).

Quote from: Padma on September 18, 2011, 03:45:31 AM
I first came out to a friend 25 years ago - then went firmly back into the closet until last summer. Since then, everyone knows :). Oh, well, apart from my landlords, and I'll probably need to clue them in soon, as I've started wearing more obviously female clothes and changing my hair. But I'm fairly androgyne in my presentation anyway.

I'm currently looking for work, and I have a "helping you get a job" interview next week with the DWP over here, and will be saying to them "Any suggestions about finding work whilst transitioning?" and watch them go gulp... ;D.

So far, only one old friend has freaked out in a bad way, and that's been painful - but everyone else I've told has been amazing, including my brother. My parents are out of the picture, so I don't have to worry about what they think (I'm sure my dad, who is an everything-phobe, would be awful, but we don't talk any more so who cares :)).

I lost my former fruitfly.  I lost a few friends from college who were sorta kinda religious. But no family members or anything.

I came out to my parents about a week before I started hrt. They took it pretty well.

I haven't had anyone freak out at me yet, but then I tend to be cautious about who I tell.

Well haven't started therapy yet, but hopefully in October I will.
I came out to my mum... hmm think it was Aug 29th so just about 22-23days ago?
So yeah she told my step-dad who seems to just deny and shake his head, and her close friend who lives a state away who had to put down the phone for awhile and come back with an "Oh-MY GOD", but yeah.

I started coming out to my friends and then-significant other a year or so ago, before I was in therapy, and almost a year after I started looking into gender variance. I started therapy last January, not for gender issues specifically, but I came out to my therapist a month or two later. I finally came out to my parents a month or two ago. Everyone's taken it well, and my parents have agreed to help me pay for my breast reduction/ top surgery when they're able to. I haven't lost any friends or family members over it, but then again I haven't told any friends or family members I really feared losing.