Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I am much too tall to ever pass as a woman.    I do intend to develop my breasts and undergo laser/electrolysis - luckily my facial hair is very light.    I also intend to undergo an orchiectomy in the future.    As I could never pass as female I don't intend to legally change my name or get a surgically constructed vagina.   There is a technique where you get the genitals removed but they don't create a vagina.

I just wish that certain present and recently left members wouldn't be so hoity toity and judgemental about this.   

You should do what you want.  Just make sure it is what you want.  You might be surprised at being able to pass easily or even more content if you feel like you don't pass quite well enough.   I'm just starting this journey of figuring out where I am and where I am going.  I haven't rejected or concluded anything yet.

Quote from: Princess of Hearts on October 06, 2011, 03:20:38 PM
I am much too tall to ever pass as a woman.

Can I ask how tall you are? I'm 6'1" and have no trouble being gendered female - of course that may have to do with the part of the world I live in, but tall girls are not impossible. Actually, I really like being this tall. But of course you need to do what's right for you.

I am 6'4".   

Australian women tend to be tall Elle McPherson is by no means the only tall woman in Australia.   Here in Scotland people don't tend to be so tall women especially.   

There are lots of tall women in Europe.

Quote from: Princess of Hearts on October 06, 2011, 04:59:22 PM
I am 6'4".

People might wonder if you're a basketball player, but that's not impossible. Really, face and voice seem to affect how people gender you more than just about anything else.

Quote from: Sarah7 on October 06, 2011, 05:08:59 PM
People might wonder if you're a basketball player, but that's not impossible. Really, face and voice seem to affect how people gender you more than just about anything else.

I am not sure that I have the confidence needed to carry it off.   I suppose that something must be done because I had to leave a 12 week college course because I can't pretend to be male for 10-11 hours a day.

Hi Princess.  Last weekend I met a friends dad who is MtF trans.  She is 6'4". Very slender gal.  My boss had no idea she was trans.  She passed as a woman because she is a woman.  It's how you carry yourself for the most part.

Be happy sister...

  I am 6'2", age 58 and not very attractive as a male.  Women have said so in the past with vile words.  Where I am going at this point is unknown.  The main thing is that I will NOT go back the way I was 11 months ago!   The only direction for me should be forward towards womanhood at this point.   Who knows?  I may even go full time soon.  I'm with Princess on this.  Too tall?  I doubt it!
  Joelene

There are plenty of tall women everywhere.  Well, maybe not in China.  Anyway don't let your height be a detraction from you being a woman. Confidence comes from practicing.  It also comes from within yourself. 

Dear Princess,
I'm with you!  I make the sacrifices and efforts necessary to please myself.  I conform my body to my mental image as much as I can.  After 5 years of hormones and facial electrolysis, I know longer see a stranger in the mirror.  I am not a martyr.  By doing enough, I am able to keep the rest - butch job (high pay), accepting wife, etc.  I admit that I am leaning towards an orchiectomy, at which point I will be complete.  That works for ME.  Like you, I have felt the "transier than thou" whip attacks from certain members of the "SRS and only SRS" crowd.  "Why, you're nothing but a TRANSVESTITIE!"   Pay them no mind.  Find what works for you and allows you to have your best life, to quote Oprah.  Some have the looks from birth to make an easy transition.  Some have money.  Some an accepting family.  My, how pleasant.  Others have to make choices, accommodations, and compromises to get the most out of life.  That's me. 

Quote from: Cindy Stephens on October 11, 2011, 11:55:05 AM
Dear Princess,
I'm with you!  I make the sacrifices and efforts necessary to please myself.  I conform my body to my mental image as much as I can.  After 5 years of hormones and facial electrolysis, I know longer see a stranger in the mirror.  I am not a martyr.  By doing enough, I am able to keep the rest - butch job (high pay), accepting wife, etc.  I admit that I am leaning towards an orchiectomy, at which point I will be complete.  That works for ME.  Like you, I have felt the "transier than thou" whip attacks from certain members of the "SRS and only SRS" crowd.  "Why, you're nothing but a TRANSVESTITIE!"   Pay them no mind.  Find what works for you and allows you to have your best life, to quote Oprah.  Some have the looks from birth to make an easy transition.  Some have money.  Some an accepting family.  My, how pleasant.  Others have to make choices, accommodations, and compromises to get the most out of life.  That's me.

I agree 100 %. 

Princess,

Too Tall?  That is what a GG (one of our church musicians) calls herself.  She's 6-5 and I've never seen her in flats unless she's off the clock.  (She also wears a size 15 shoe - and I thought decent 13's were hard to find...) 

Quote from: Princess of Hearts on October 06, 2011, 03:20:38 PM
I am much too tall to ever pass as a woman...   

I just wish that certain present and recently left members wouldn't be so hoity toity and judgemental about this.   

Listen to Sarah, Monica, Cindy, Donna E and Debbie - you must do what is right for you.  If you are a tall lady, then be tall and proud of it. 

I am not as tall as you but have had few problems.  The first acceptance comes from within...   

Susan 

6'1" isn't all that tall these days for women in your age group. Try being 6' tall when the average height of all your male peers was 5'8"! I can understand you reluctance. My height was a big factor for me in my youth not to try transition. The last thing I needed and especially the last thing I wanted was to stand out.

However, these days I do not have a lot of trepidation about going out in up to 3" heels. The tons of self confidence I have gained this past year or more certainly gets some of the credit. Being a hyper-vigilant type I am 99% sure just about no one has ever given me as much as a second glance.

Attitude and confidence makes a lot of our alleged short comings look trivial. It just takes time to develop them

 :) Princess, 

When I "discovered" at 40 that I was trans,  this was the insight that ended 20 yrs of recurrent serious depression.
Even then it had taken me more than 3 yrs of weekly counseling to "get it."  I was in a CD org., and the first emphasis I
found was just to take little steps toward complete dressing.  And for me that took courage, but it led to self-acceptance
and peace of mind.  Now in my mid-60s, I live by myself and dress & live as female (non-transitioning) as much as I can,
tho ltd. strength & energy keep me home a lot.  But I still have the joy and happiness of just being myself and being free
of the old constraints.  Several yrs ago, when I told my sister about being trans, I said , "I've found what makes me happy!"

:icon_chick: Cheers,

Sandra

I don't know if I should even bother to post cause it's already all been said and I totally agree.  First you need to do what is right for yourself and what you want.  I think it's just as absurd for transitioned women to say you haven't gone far enough as it is for some other people to say you should just live your life as you were born (a male).  What right does anyone have to say how you should live your life and what you should do with your body.  Second I don't think you can be too tall to be a woman....You just happen to be a very tall woman.

Actually most MTFs shrink in height if they get an orchiectomy . The lack of testosterone does that plus the loss of muscle mass. I lost 3 inches in height.

Quote from: Princess of Hearts on October 06, 2011, 03:20:38 PM
I am much too tall to ever pass as a woman.    I do intend to develop my breasts and undergo laser/electrolysis - luckily my facial hair is very light.    I also intend to undergo an orchiectomy in the future.    As I could never pass as female I don't intend to legally change my name or get a surgically constructed vagina.   There is a technique where you get the genitals removed but they don't create a vagina.

I just wish that certain present and recently left members wouldn't be so hoity toity and judgemental about this.

I'm 6'.  I mostly wear 3" heels when I go out.  I am such an amazon.  And I pass.  Not all the time, but enough.  When my hair is longer, I suspect I'll pass 90%.  Take away the apple, and 99.9%.  Height doesn't scream "man" the way it once did.  Look at the younger crowd - I see so many uber tall girls...and boys too.  College aged.  It's something to do with modern healthcare and access to large quantities of healthy food.

Quote from: Happy Girl! on October 06, 2011, 04:59:22 PM
I am 6'4".   

Australian women tend to be tall Elle McPherson is by no means the only tall woman in Australia.   Here in Scotland people don't tend to be so tall women especially.

Yay, another Scot on the board  ;D  My wife is the same height as me and her sister is 6', and they're malnourished Weegies.

I'm 6'1, and nothing is stopping me from hurtling towards transition, albeit at a slow pace.

Being tall as a girl *will* draw attention to you, however I agree with everyone else that it is possible to pass even at 6'4". 

I am 6'0, 170lbs, never taken hormones so I have a masculine physique (not overly muscular but more toned than any females except perhaps professional athletes).  Yet I pass in almost all situations because I was lucky to be born with a feminine/androgynous facial structure.  Typically the only times I get clocked is when my voice slips.

It is true what they say, face/voice is the deciding factor whether or not you will pass.  Height or masculine physique will draw attention to you but as long as your face/voice are good enough you can still pass.   I would say that the taller or more muscular you are the better your face/voice needs to be in order to really pass.  I know it sucks for those of you who are really tall with masculine facial features but on the bright side at least face/voice are things you *can* change, unlike height, shoulder breadth, hips, etc..  Yes it may take a long time saving up for FFS and practicing voice/mannerisms/posture, but I believe almost anyone can become passable given enough time and effort.

Despite being lucky and not needing FFS I never thought I would be able to pass the way I do.  I thought my height, shoulders, big feet, etc.. would be a dead giveaway, but in practice I have found those things don't really matter, people are hardwired to gender you based on your face primarily and most people will overlook even the most obvious clues as long as your face/voice are decent.

hey :) please don't let your height not let you do want you want. I know it's hard but look at female basketball players for an example they a quite tall but no one goes wow no doubt a man :) so maybe don't let height be to much a mental stopper :) i have a cis friend shes 6'1'' ft :) and all the boys think she's beautiful :) so height ain't a gender marker to worry about to much :)

Remember The Golden Rule: As you think, so you are.

Jennifer

Quote from: Jennifer on October 26, 2011, 12:35:52 PM
Remember The Golden Rule: As you think, so you are.

Jennifer

I think I am two meters tall.

Suddenly, I am!

Quote from: Happy Girl! on October 06, 2011, 03:20:38 PM
I am much too tall to ever pass as a woman.    I do intend to develop my breasts and undergo laser/electrolysis - luckily my facial hair is very light.    I also intend to undergo an orchiectomy in the future.    As I could never pass as female I don't intend to legally change my name or get a surgically constructed vagina.   There is a technique where you get the genitals removed but they don't create a vagina.

I just wish that certain present and recently left members wouldn't be so hoity toity and judgemental about this.

Even tall, with serious plans for breasts, laser and an orchi you might be underestimating your at a glance passing, and thats most of your day to day out and about.
with the plans you've mentioned I wouldn't discount the name change, its a hassle but is one hell of a stress relief not having the male name stare at you all the time.

Where I work we look at ID's down to the micro print and RFID security features, (microscopes and UV. no joke) but most people never even look at the gender marker.
its " name matches the check and picture matches the face and your on your way"