Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I know this topic has been brought up before, but I didn't see any polls on it, and since I've met many transfolk IRL and online who have Asperger's, it's made me pretty curious as to the actual prevalence of it in our community. I only just figured out that I have it; I only fit the symptoms, from childhood to adulthood, perfectly lol. Anyway, please answer the poll, and if you're so inclined, tell me how it affects you, how long you've known about it, how it relates to your being trans/ your transition, and what you do to cope with it.

I'll start--- I have, from childhood, had severe problems with verbal communication. Everything I say makes perfect sense to me, but to others, often the opposite of what I think I'm saying is what's comprehended. I've never had difficulty with writing except in social interaction (instant messaging, etc), but always have had that verbal handicap. Talking on the phone is incredibly difficult for me, because I can't match facial expressions to words. Also, my facial expressions and tone of voice often do not match what I'm saying, which makes it easy for others to misunderstand my intent.

As per how it affects my being trans and my transition, I'm wondering whether the disconnect between my mental and physical gender, even from an early age, brought on the Asperger's. Transition has actually lessened the detrimental effect of the disorder for me as far as social interaction, since Asperger's social style is more reminiscent of male communication, not female; however, I still have major difficulties in relationships due to the misunderstanding it causes. I find myself having to write out my thoughts in order to resolve disputes with my girlfriend.

Anyway... this is the poll/thread. Run with it!

I don't have Asperger's, but I do have PDD(NOS). It's been clinically diagnosed and, though on the minor side, rears its head pretty often. It mostly just causes me difficulty in interpreting what other people are saying verbally because I can't recognize facial expressions and often don't understand the emotions behind the words. I've always been a good writer when it comes to stories, essays, and longer messages, but I utterly fail at chatrooms and instant messaging. Unless I 'm trying to troll the person in which case I'm pretty good. I am also extremely sensitive to light, sound, and touch.

I always knew there was something a bit off about my social interaction, but I didn't know what. I didn't know anything about Autism Spectrum disorders other than full blown autism somewhat resembling a mentally retarded person. Being uneducated, I honestly didn't know what the difference was. Then I read The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime and was somewhat alarmed to find that I thought very similarly to the main character, who had severe Asperger's. I was reassured by various people that I did not have Asperger's, though. When I was briefly institutionalized for mental problems, I was officially diagnosed with PDD(NOS) along with OCD and general anxiety. I have been going to Occupational Therapy once a week for about 5 months now to learn to cope with certain limitations caused by it.

I think it relates to my transhood in a few ways. For a long time before I was diagnosed, people were convinced I had been raped or something since I would flinch or duck away from any physical touch. My being dysphoric about my body and having a strong desire for my torso to not be emphasized didn't help.On a more positive note, because of my naturally monotonous (and deeper than most females') voice and my usual complete lack of any facial expression does seem to help me pass.

If you take the set of symptoms they characterize Asperger's by and imagine the direct opposite, that's me.

I've taken at least five extensive online tests, and they all say I'm very much an Aspie.  I'm hoping to get a professional opinion with the therapy I started recently.

i'm a formally diagnosed aspie. i also have expressive receptive language disorder. really, i didn't actually know i had it until relatively recent. i was diagnosed at 16. i am 19 now. basically, it affects me in many ways. one thing i am very sensitive to is touch. i'm very hypersensitive to others touching me, certain kinds of clothing are to uncomfortable for me to tolerate, sometimes i get this overwhelming feeling of so much sensitivity on certain occassions. i do something called "stemming." stemming is mostly calming of the nervous system, which i do by walking around the kitchen table. i make poor eye contact. if i am talking to someone in person, it is often very quietly, i have poor emotional expression in my voice. really, i don't know about this, because i'm the most normal person i know, but it took me a long time to understand the comparisons. i have no friends whatsoever irl. i just have family, which i see every now and then. i have something called hyptonia along with it. that is soft floppy muscles, which affect the way i walk, and posture, and makes my hands pretty weak as far as doing anything with hands. what else? i have trouble understanding things that are not presented to me in a layman's fashion. i often was made fun of because of my inability to understand someone else's "social cue." of course, i've gotten better with it over the years as far as memorizing it as a set of facts. i spend alot of time obsessed with a current narrow area of interest. it's hard for me to fluidly change as my environment changes, and that type of thing. i could explain it for days, but i think you get the picture. my asperger's really didn't affect my feelings of femininity despite popular belief. i have a mild femininity, but not masculine in the slightest. i'm quite unisex in many ways. i hated being male so much, i couldn't compartmentalize my emotions. i guess that's all before it gets too long.

Quote from: Jen on October 10, 2011, 10:55:24 PM
If you take the set of symptoms they characterize Asperger's by and imagine the direct opposite, that's me.

groovy

Yeah, formally diagnosed with it. To me, one of the most annoying things is not understanding the subtle parts of social interaction, and being bad at reading expressions and gauging intent based on that. Another really annoying thing is that people misunderstand me a lot. Just now, my mother seemed to get annoyed with me and I don't understand what I did wrong. I also have motor skills problems, a slightly delayed reaction time, and my hand-eye coordination is not good at all. Ergo, gym class's been crap for me. People have told me I usually have the same, serious expression a lot. I'm currently very interested in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and the Elric saga by Michael Moorcock (a series of fantasy books). I used to be obsessed with ants and dinosaurs when I was a child. I've known about it for about two years, since I was diagnosed with it quite lately. I'm not sure if it affects my transness or not, but I am well aware of the fact that transitioning will not make me neurotypical and that I'll have these symptoms for life. I've always had it easier socializing with guys than with girls.

  No, I don't.  But I suspected it.  I am more socially outgoing now than a year ago.  I would not be on a forum a year ago where you can put out your emotions!  I am very frank with people on where I stand on things and on my transistion.  I was quite timid and introverted.  I can be confrontational at times now.  Those things I never did before. 
  Joelene

I don't personally have it, but my nephew, who should be about 11 or 12 now, does. He's always had a lot of trouble communicating and he gets angered very easily. Because of it, he's been kicked out of at least three pre-schools for anti-social behavior (he actually bit someone once). Then again, and I'm not sure if this would add to the problem, his mother (my sister) is a nut job. She's one of those people that will lie so much that they start believing their lies, and it's gotten to the point where she believes my mother abused her as a child (VERY far from the truth). Anyway, I digress.

Sometimes I wonder if my nephew is gay or trans. He acts very flamboyant at times, though this may be because his only real role model is his mother. He has made comments to me such as, "Sometimes I wish I was a girl," but they were usually in context to something negative about men, such as how badly their bathrooms smell. Only time will tell on this matter I think, but no matter what he is I will welcome him with open arms.

It's weird because on my dad's side I have two cousins who have autism and another who has asperger's. All three of them are cismales, and the other two female cousins have never been diagnosed with anything. I've wondered if something is genetically different with the Y chromosome getting passed down. What's more weird is that each set of parents of my cousins have really high IQs and are rather socially awkward so I think it 'makes sense'.

Honestly, although I believe it is a real condition.. I think it is over diagnosed, sorry. I think everyone wants a name for something. I feel like every time I go through the list that I have most of the signs (I must add that I am not biologically related to my dad's side) but I am better off not getting diagnosed with anything. It's like, even though I am trans I never got diagnosed with GID. I don't want a condition to blame my problems for.

I have anxiety but my social skills are actually pretty good. If there is difficulty it is usually around hiding/operating under the anxiety  :(

Quote from: Da Monkey on October 11, 2011, 07:56:32 AM
It's weird because on my dad's side I have two cousins who have autism and another who has asperger's. All three of them are cismales, and the other two female cousins have never been diagnosed with anything. I've wondered if something is genetically different with the Y chromosome getting passed down. What's more weird is that each set of parents of my cousins have really high IQs and are rather socially awkward so I think it 'makes sense'.

Honestly, although I believe it is a real condition.. I think it is over diagnosed, sorry. I think everyone wants a name for something. I feel like every time I go through the list that I have most of the signs (I must add that I am not biologically related to my dad's side) but I am better off not getting diagnosed with anything. It's like, even though I am trans I never got diagnosed with GID. I don't want a condition to blame my problems for.

This is a valid point, certainly, but for me, I don't want to blame my problems on something--- I just want to know what's wrong so I can go about fixing it. I've struggled my entire life to just make friends and be able to be in social situations without feeling like an alien, and never had any idea there might be a disorder causing it--- I just figured I was a social failure. For me, it's far better to know that it's not something I did to myself, but rather something that developed very early in my life, that now I must learn to work with. My self-esteem has always been dismally low, so finding out that I'm not just an utter failure at life is incredibly refreshing.

Quote from: Luc on October 11, 2011, 05:43:37 PM
This is a valid point, certainly, but for me, I don't want to blame my problems on something--- I just want to know what's wrong so I can go about fixing it. I've struggled my entire life to just make friends and be able to be in social situations without feeling like an alien, and never had any idea there might be a disorder causing it--- I just figured I was a social failure. For me, it's far better to know that it's not something I did to myself, but rather something that developed very early in my life, that now I must learn to work with. My self-esteem has always been dismally low, so finding out that I'm not just an utter failure at life is incredibly refreshing.

Yeah that makes sense. I am not saying everyone wants to blame something but there are some who just say their problems are a condition just so they can sit around in self pity and do nothing about it.

I am also formally diagnosed, and from quite an early age too. When I was a lot younger, I would have extreme difficulties with social difficulties. I would have difficulty understanding social nuances that most individuals take for granted. For example, I would take something that a person said literally, even if it was clear (to others) that it was sarcastic. My manner of speaking would be very awkward. I would be extremely afraid to stand up for myself.

Now, no one can seem to tell that I have the syndrome. Once I entered college, I was forced into an environment where I basically had to socialize with others. I strongly dislike the college social atmosphere (everyone seems obsessed with partying, sports, and other things I don't care for), but I have made a number of good friends while I've been here. (I'm graduating 2012).

The only  way I can say that Aspergers could have affected my potential ->-bleeped-<-  is that it might have prevented me from recognizing it until a year ago. That, and while I'm not that masculine, I'm about as ungirly as you can get.

I hope this helps.

Vi

I have done a lot of research on the subject, and taken a lot of tests.

I do believe I have it, but I'm hesitant on making a self-diagnosis when it comes to Asperger's because so many people falsely do so. I might bring it up with my therapist at some point.

Officially diagnosed here as an adult. Not sure what, if anything, it has to do with being trans.

My particular variant is very heavy on the sensory/motor elements and hypersensitivity, but very light on the concrete thinking and obsessive interest parts (how I perceive the world seems to be much more out of line with other people than how I think about it is).

On coping: I really have never found a good way. I tend to isolate a lot. When your food issues make a picky 5-year-old look adventurous, and on top of that you have a major gastrointestinal disease, and you can't handle being touched except by certain people, and you can't handle disorganized noise, and you can't make eye contact, and you can't speak and do anything else at the same time, and you trip over everything, and your facial expressions are always wrong...well, leaving the house just never seems like a great plan. And unlike many people on the spectrum I'm fully aware that I'm being weird - I'm deeply sensitive to social disapproval.

I feel like I'm jumping on some bandwagon here, but I really think I'm somewhere on the autism spectrum, even though I don't have a formal diagnosis. Then again, a lot of Asperger's-like symptoms I have can be explained by things like my highly-sensitive temperament, attention deficit disorder, depression, and social anxiety.

the first time i even heard about asperger's was when i was watching an older season of america's next top model from years ago. there was a model on there with asperger's, and i felt somehow like i could relate to her, but it wasn't until just shortly after that i was officially diagnosed. it's this thing about being the most normal person you know. i didn't have the thought in my head "i must have asperger's." i would say that if you're searching for answers and taking a stab at self diagnosis with this condition, it just doesn't sound like it adds up to me. from what i've experienced and heard, someone with asperger's is very set in their ways. there have been people on this site who have said before that this is a "fad" disorder. i really find it offensive, because they really have no idea what it's like from the standpoint of someone who truly has it. the things people do everyday in the social world often make no sense to me. my brain just doesn't have the ability to make sense of it. i couldn't join after school activities to work on my social skills, and i certainly didn't receive it from video games.

i'll just say posters like jen rub me the wrong way. i don't see where someone gets off going into a thread on a certain mental disorder, disability, syndrome, or birth condition saying "i'm completely opposite." what does a statement like that do constructively to add to the thread other than boosting ones own ego? i really don't wish to be used as a stepping stone for anothers ego.

anyway, with asperger's syndrome, you won't have a concrete answer unless you are told by a professional. self diagnosing this type of condition is more or less just putting a blanket over your shortcomings. many people have the symptoms of asperger's as they are just the presented criteria, it happens alot. it's not just meeting the criteria in some shape or form that is what you should be looking at, it is the archetype of the condition itself. the symptom criteria is just the consequences of it. the point i'm trying to make here is, there is no value in using asperger's as a word to describe yourself. the only value comes from finding harmony in yourself and accepting what comes natural to you. in some cases, getting a diagnosis could be a precursor to this, but can be done without one as well as who you are doesn't change either way.

Getting the diagnosis really helped me with understanding myself. It put a name on my difficulties, and my strenghts. Some people will use their diagnosis as a "universal excuse", saying things like "oh, I can't clean my room, I've got Asperger's". I find that pretty immature behaviour.

I'm in a class especially for youths with AS, and I really do enjoy school nowadays. I have several friends, we all understand each other, and the teachers are nice and understanding. The wonderful feeling when someone says that they've missed you after you've been staying home sick, that happiness you feel when people want you to sit at their table in the cafeteria, the sharing of secrets and silliness, jokes and facts... Those are all wonderful things, and I am so happy I have my friends.
We learn exactly the same things as the neurotypical/"normal" students do, but our schedule's structured differently and classes are smaller. So they aren't dumbing things down for the aspies.

Apparantly, one of the side effects of my antidepressant seems to be "-2 Social Skills", as I am getting even worse at socializing. I make people angry without meaning to. I completely miss the points of jokes. I turn every conversation into a My little Pony: Friendship Is Magic one. This is strange and I don't really like it, as I would like to be better at handling people in general, certainly not worse.

Quote from: PixieBoy on October 21, 2011, 04:14:50 PM
Getting the diagnosis really helped me with understanding myself. It put a name on my difficulties, and my strenghts. Some people will use their diagnosis as a "universal excuse", saying things like "oh, I can't clean my room, I've got Asperger's". I find that pretty immature behaviour.

I'm in a class especially for youths with AS, and I really do enjoy school nowadays. I have several friends, we all understand each other, and the teachers are nice and understanding. The wonderful feeling when someone says that they've missed you after you've been staying home sick, that happiness you feel when people want you to sit at their table in the cafeteria, the sharing of secrets and silliness, jokes and facts... Those are all wonderful things, and I am so happy I have my friends.
We learn exactly the same things as the neurotypical/"normal" students do, but our schedule's structured differently and classes are smaller. So they aren't dumbing things down for the aspies.

Apparantly, one of the side effects of my antidepressant seems to be "-2 Social Skills", as I am getting even worse at socializing. I make people angry without meaning to. I completely miss the points of jokes. I turn every conversation into a My little Pony: Friendship Is Magic one. This is strange and I don't really like it, as I would like to be better at handling people in general, certainly not worse.

it helped me as well in that i didn't have to measure myself against other people in ways i didn't understand. i'm just sure there's lots of people who are nothing to do with asperger's, but they use it as a platform because they have some of the symptoms, and then it's the same people saying "fad disorder." unfortunately, i never got the opportunity to be in classes with other aspies. i had to do the regular education classes from day one, which was a real struggle. i just had an iep for a few years which had nothing to do with asperger's btw, and then high school 10th grade and up was just a 504. i was still in the mainstream education classes, but the school i went to was worst in the state as my mom put it.

I had it more when i was younger. I have it less these days. I'll probably have it more when i get older. My 88 yr old mom seems to have it now. She use to run a chemistry lab but has always been an isolationist. I think it will come and go over time. In the test i just took i was a 30 and it says i needed to be a 32 so i am low for testing positive.

Oh in the poll i marked i don't know

I honestly don't know. When I first read about it, everything sounded exactly like what I had experienced, I don't think there was a symptom that didn't match up. I've read about three books about Asperger's by now, and I do think there are some similarities. However, not only am I unwilling to diagnose myself, but I also think a lot of the symptoms could be explained by other things. For example, social anxiety, OCD, and a very high IQ, paired with some naturally bad interpersonal skills, would look just like it while being entirely different. Additionally, I am considerably less awkward socially in a male role than a female one... and though I still have below average socialising abilities, I'm inclined to think gender had a good deal to do with it when I was younger. I also haven't had some behaviors consistently, like "special interests." I've had obsessions, but I've also gone lengths of time without them. So at the moment, I wouldn't say I have Asperger's. Though everyone else disagrees...

My mom, dad, oldest friend, and all of my dad's colleagues (doctors, though not psychiatric) think I have Asperger's. I think my therapist finds it likely as well, but it isn't something we've spent time discussing. As far as I'm concerned, I'm currently able to read facial expressions and intonations, and to express them myself, well enough that I find it unlikely I'd have more than very mild Asperger's. I do have difficulty telling when someone is feeling an emotion that they are not actively expressing, but I don't think that's terribly uncommon. Previous criticism of my level of emotional expression, or lack thereof, I'm inclined to attribute to being gender-atypical.

So that's quite a rambling, but there you are.

I thought I was the only one who has had these sort of problems.  I have wondered for a long time if that is what's going on with me, but I'm too afraid to ask a professional.  Plus I can't be sure if a lot of my symptoms aren't stemming from my decade of social isolation and my dysphoria.

With me, I have two cousins who have forms of autism, and physically, I fit many, many bills that you see with mentally handicapped folk; severe facial deformities effecting every facial feature, irregular vocal tone, undecipherable handwriting, extreme social flaws, stunted physical growth. And concerning mental abilities, I've always had an extremely high IQ because of my extremely precise memory capabilities, but when it comes to interests, I've always had extreme obsessions with things like the imaginary worlds I create in my head when writing books or scripts (I draw the characters, compose the scores, write the entire things, ect ect) and I do have quite a few obsessions about random things like certain video games or books that I know every single detail about fanatically.

However, I really don't think I have any form of autism really. I think any social awkardness I have is attributed to how, when growing up, my family was both abusive and very strange, and that I had very few friends even in my youngest of years; I just had no way to develop socially and my parents were socially stuck in the 1940's. Even growing up in school, my autistic appearance (I truly looked like I had mild down syndrome, I have very typical facial features of autistic children) caused constant bullying and complete sexual/social alientation, so I never developed social skills even growing up as a teenager and into an adult. Plus, on top of being self-concious about appearing autistic, the same features plagued me because they were also very masculine and not at all female.

One thing I've always been curious about is way back in 3rd grade, I suffered a significant trauma to my skull when one boy plowed into my head on the playground when he was running at super-speed without looking; it knocked me out unconcious for a few seconds and left me with a black eye that lasted forever. Before that incident, I looked very normal, my handwriting was very good, and I had virtually no negative tendencies. Post-accident, all of my pictures showcase features that started to grow rapidly in a direction that looked very "twisted" and handicapped (everyone here has seen autistic children), my handwriting became downright horrid unless I concentrated on it to the point it hurts, and I started developing a lot of OCD periods concerning very weird stuff. Not to mention, my biggest concern at the moment is still figuring out wether or not I have Acromegaly, which can be caused by trauma to the brain.

Quote from: RhinoP on November 04, 2011, 03:11:25 AM
With me, I have two cousins who have forms of autism, and physically, I fit many, many bills that you see with mentally handicapped folk; severe facial deformities effecting every facial feature, irregular vocal tone, undecipherable handwriting, extreme social flaws, stunted physical growth. And concerning mental abilities, I've always had an extremely high IQ because of my extremely precise memory capabilities, but when it comes to interests, I've always had extreme obsessions with things like the imaginary worlds I create in my head when writing books or scripts (I draw the characters, compose the scores, write the entire things, ect ect) and I do have quite a few obsessions about random things like certain video games or books that I know every single detail about fanatically.

However, I really don't think I have any form of autism really. I think any social awkardness I have is attributed to how, when growing up, my family was both abusive and very strange, and that I had very few friends even in my youngest of years; I just had no way to develop socially and my parents were socially stuck in the 1940's. Even growing up in school, my autistic appearance (I truly looked like I had mild down syndrome, I have very typical facial features of autistic children) caused constant bullying and complete sexual/social alientation, so I never developed social skills even growing up as a teenager and into an adult. Plus, on top of being self-concious about appearing autistic, the same features plagued me because they were also very masculine and not at all female.

One thing I've always been curious about is way back in 3rd grade, I suffered a significant trauma to my skull when one boy plowed into my head on the playground when he was running at super-speed without looking; it knocked me out unconcious for a few seconds and left me with a black eye that lasted forever. Before that incident, I looked very normal, my handwriting was very good, and I had virtually no negative tendencies. Post-accident, all of my pictures showcase features that started to grow rapidly in a direction that looked very "twisted" and handicapped (everyone here has seen autistic children), my handwriting became downright horrid unless I concentrated on it to the point it hurts, and I started developing a lot of OCD periods concerning very weird stuff. Not to mention, my biggest concern at the moment is still figuring out wether or not I have Acromegaly, which can be caused by trauma to the brain.

i don't know if you're confusing autism spectrum with down syndrome, but asperger's people really don't physically look "twisted." at least not that i know of. there is someting called hyptonia which is a physical part of asperger's and autism. it means i have really soft muscle tissue which affects alot of things like my posture, walk, and i often lean on things when standing for long periods of time. i get fatigued more just getting through the day, but i'm not sure what you mean by features of autistic people.