Community Conversation => Significant Others talk => Topic started by: qUiRkY qUeEn on October 15, 2011, 08:47:38 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on October 15, 2011, 08:47:38 PM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on October 15, 2011, 08:47:38 PM
I am getting pretty upset with Jill, I am her to help her I am the best help she has at this point and everything I say or do is wrong!!!! I want to help her!!!! I am not trying to be selfish by any means. I know that right now she is suffering from no self esteem and she is very helpless right now, scared, hopeless, she is back in the darkness!!! I LOVE HER TO FRIGGIN DEATH!!! In fact my heart has felt pain that I could never imagine!!! She is in the other room crying herself to sleep!! From what I hear, the early transition period is the hardest. I need to be held and conforted as well. ->-bleeped-<- I have seen my spouse go through the worst imaginable pain ever!!!!!! I AM TOLD TO JUST SIT THERE AND HOLD HER!!!! DO NOT SAY ONE WORD!!! She is in SOOOOOO much despair right now. Will this ever go away?? Please tell me, she will live as a happy woman. She does look very pretty already and this is the 5 month point. You know what I need a break from this, I am going to go down stairs and read my book.
Title: Re: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: LilDevilOfPrada on October 16, 2011, 08:29:41 AM
Post by: LilDevilOfPrada on October 16, 2011, 08:29:41 AM
i am so sorry ! i joined here around the same time as jill tho she most prob doesn't know me :) but i have read her posts and well i find it so odd because i could see how much she loves you. now i am 4 months hRt and my passing phase of omg i am so ugly still is around but i stopped caring tho. Now heres my advice don't let Jill think you don't love her :) i bet you already do that but i think maybe if your not already doing it teach her stuff like how to do make etc or even one day just like give her a little make over just to show her that her beauty is there just not completely yet :) i know its hard i was a SO to a ftm sadly he ... but that's because i gave up and let him ruin my days :( that's one thing you shouldn't let happen i know she is at a important part but you must make sure she doesn't forget your in this to and how her constant sadness is hurting your precious relationship and she must see that if you are to be happy to :) I AM SORRY THAT I CAN'T BE MORE HELP AND I AM MORE SORRY IF THIS WASN'T ENOUGH :(
Title: Re: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: cynthialee on October 16, 2011, 09:04:37 AM
Post by: cynthialee on October 16, 2011, 09:04:37 AM
show her the last few posts you made
:icon_hug:
Tell her it was my plan not yours.
;)
:icon_hug:
Tell her it was my plan not yours.
;)
Title: Re: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: Amazon D on October 16, 2011, 05:11:15 PM
Post by: Amazon D on October 16, 2011, 05:11:15 PM
She needs to take the focus off herself and realize that she is damn fortunate to have you / somebody. Most are alone with no one and never find anyone. Thats tough. What she has is nothing. tell her i told her so.. I am 14 yrs post op and still single :(
Title: Re: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: Nemo on October 17, 2011, 01:57:38 PM
Post by: Nemo on October 17, 2011, 01:57:38 PM
Sadly there are some times when loved ones are the last person they want around. They don't want to bring them down too, or they feel undeserving of their love. Or they just prefer to be alone. Thankfully it's been a long time since I was in that dark place, but I still remember what it was like.
The best you can do at this point is leave her to her own space - and start asking about counseling, 'cause it sounds like you both need it :(
The best you can do at this point is leave her to her own space - and start asking about counseling, 'cause it sounds like you both need it :(
Title: Re: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on October 17, 2011, 08:26:09 PM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on October 17, 2011, 08:26:09 PM
Thank you everyone!!! We are better now and I will keep on truckin right along with her!! We are learning as we go just like everyone else!! She does appreciate me and loves me to the bitter end and that I am grateful for, Until the next wave of sorrow..... I know it will get easier tho... Just is a matter of when?? We are planing to move to Portland, Oregon!!! Amazing City!!! Very loving and good vibes!!
Title: Re: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: cynthialee on October 17, 2011, 09:16:03 PM
Post by: cynthialee on October 17, 2011, 09:16:03 PM
Cool.
Sevan and I are in Portland right now at hir parents.
Sevan and I are in Portland right now at hir parents.
Title: Re: Partner is Pushing me away!!!! BIG TIME!!!!!
Post by: Cen on October 18, 2011, 02:03:59 AM
Post by: Cen on October 18, 2011, 02:03:59 AM
<< Portland resident, here. ;D
It's a great place.
It's a great place.