Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So the first therapist I saw unfortunately didn't know anything about being trans.  but he did help me find someone who does.

So I just had my first meeting with this new guy.  and I don't know if I liked what he had to tell me.  but maybe I just need perspective.


Firstly, I feel bad that I didn't know I was trans ever since I was a little kid.  I only really knew what "transsexual" meant when I was like 17.  And I didn't know for sure that that was what I was until I was 19.  So, I don't feel very convincing.  And I've heard stories from people who see therapist and the therapist agrees to write the letter on the first appointment (not that they write on the first appointment, but like a promise that they will).
And well, this guy, he wants me to see him for a minimum of 6 months.  And now he's talking about making it longer.
He also wants to make sure that I have a good support system, but I come from the most unaccepting family ever.  And he already told me that he won't write a letter for me until I come out to my whole family, which I think is unfair. because they're very unaccepting and I plan to go far away to college next fall so I don't have to deal with them.

So, I do I have the wrong perspective on this?  Is this how it should go? 
Basically,
How do you know when a therapist is stringing you along?  Or when he really is just doing his job the best he can?


Maybe it's just me and my lack of confidence, but he really is (unintentionally) making me feel bad for being such an unconvincing transgender.  I just feel like I can't defend my being transgender.  which just makes me feel bad.  I hate having people not believe me.

To be honest it sounds like he is gate-keeping.  I would look for another therapist but also ask people who've seen him and see if this sounds familiar to them.  But definitely find another therapist.  There is no reason you should be forced to come out to your whole family.

If you live near any reasonably-sized city, you might be able to find an informed consent clinic instead of going through all that BS. Check with your local Planned Parenthood, if you have one. If they offer TG services, you'll be able to get on T in a couple of weeks. It's also cheap as hell. I paid $19 for a blood test and chose to donate $25 for the visit, but it wasn't mandatory.

And this isn't usually mentioned when people talk about informed consent clinics, but they do have you sit down with a social worker or doctor before handing you a prescription. There's still a chance to talk things through and make sure you really want to go on hormones.

I understand where he is coming from with the whole family thing. But at the end of the day, it really isn't their business unless you want it to be. Anyway, I know I'm probably not gonna be much help but if you can't find another therapist to help you. Then maybe just wait until you go away for school. I know my university offers free psychological services and I'm sure that I could start my transition if I went to them. (Though I've been crazy busy and stressed so I just haven't had the time.) Like I said, if he is just stringing you along, maybe just wait until you go to school and see a counselor/therapist there. Most universities do offer these services I believe. :)

I would find a new therpist or tell this one whatever he needed to hear to get me what I want.

Most universities have good counseling departments and some have therapists experienced with trans guys.  I started transitioning after I started school so many know my history here at school.  It would have great to have been able to start as a guy.

Never, ever feel like you are not trans enough! Only you can know how you feel. That being said, if your therapist makes you feel this way, find a new one. You should never feel like your experiences are not valid because you didn't know about yourself until later.

As for getting a therapist at school, I will say that it can depend on the school you go to and how close it is to a big city or whether it is in a big city. I live in a very small town. My University has about 10,000 students total and only about 6,000 actually living on the campus or in the same town. (we have a lot of students in rural areas). I went to see the therapist here at my school, and the services are free for students. In my experience, (granted, I only talked to a few therapists when I was younger about my issues) the therapists here have been more than kind and accepting. The lady I met with yesterday told me flat out that if she had the power, she would have given me a letter to start T. Since she cannot, she helped me to find therapists that 1.) offer services for transfolks in the closest city, and 2.) gave me information on therapists that offer their services long distance and are willing to work with local doctors to get me started. In a lot of ways, I feel like the transition process is easier in higher education. I didn't even know that we had trans faculty on this campus, and I worried that my transition would take away my dream of teaching at a University one day. But, thanks to her I feel much less anxiety over it now.

I don't think you should ever lie to a therapist, because one that is worth their weight in anything is there to help you. That being said, I do think that being firm is important. They are trained to try and find out all possible causes for issues, whether they are depression/anxiety/relationship/identity/insert whatever here.

So yes, I guess that whole thing was the sum up this: if your therapist is not helping you, or is making you feel like you have to earn the right to be who you are, get a new one. They are supposed to be there to help you, not try and convince you that you are something you are not. As for therapists at uni settings, I have had nothing but positive experiences. My therapist on campus is a wonderful lady, and she was more than happy to offer help, and a teddy bear when I broke down in tears. If you ever end up in Alaska as a student, I can give you the name of at least one awesome therapist.

Oh, I forget to answer the questions! Silly boy.

How do you know if a therapist is stringing you along or actually doing their job? Easy. If they are doing their job, they will be supportive, kind, and express an interest in your end goals and in your journey to become yourself. I have heard horror stories about therapists that deal with other things, like relationship counselling, that actually harmed the relationship in order to keep getting money.

If you walk out feeling nothing but doubt, frustration, and depression that will be your first clue.

Alright, I wanted to say thanks to everyone for their replies!  It makes me feel better and like I do have the right perspective on this.  I think next time I see him (in three weeks), I will bring this up to him, and see what he says.  and I will let him know that it is always an option in the back of my mind to go find another therapist.

Quote from: JohnAlex on November 08, 2011, 04:47:33 PM
Alright, I wanted to say thanks to everyone for their replies!  It makes me feel better and like I do have the right perspective on this.  I think next time I see him (in three weeks), I will bring this up to him, and see what he says.  and I will let him know that it is always an option in the back of my mind to go find another therapist.

Fantastic! The first step in defeating the gate keepers is to be defeated yourself.

If it would help, you could find the WPATH standards of care online and read them for yourself so that you'll know exactly what is recommended before beginning HRT. This might help you assert your right to reasonable access as well as to leverage yourself and let your shrink know the correct boundaries of vosotros relationship.

this is hard to answer, but you should be upfront about it if you feel he is stringing you along.

JohnAlex, are you investigating the trans health care options at the colleges you're applying to? Don't assume that you'll get what you need there.

You seem pretty young, so I'm not surprised that the therapist wants to see you for at least six months, especially if it's less often than once a week (is it?).

If you plan to have no dealings with your family after you go away to college, then I don't see any reason to come out to them. If you plan to have them in your life, that might be different. We all handle our coming out in our own way, and you should be able to do the same without pressure from your therapist. On the other hand, if you do want your family in your life, have you thought about how you want to handle the trans issue?

Quote from: Arch on November 08, 2011, 08:45:38 PMJohnAlex, are you investigating the trans health care options at the colleges you're applying to? Don't assume that you'll get what you need there.

You seem pretty young, so I'm not surprised that the therapist wants to see you for at least six months, especially if it's less often than once a week (is it?).

If you plan to have no dealings with your family after you go away to college, then I don't see any reason to come out to them. If you plan to have them in your life, that might be different. We all handle our coming out in our own way, and you should be able to do the same without pressure from your therapist. On the other hand, if you do want your family in your life, have you thought about how you want to handle the trans issue?

I don't know why people brought up the college and health care thing.  It's completely not an issue for me.  My insurance is with Kaiser. and it will be until I'm 26.  I won't be using health care at university anytime soon.
And I'm going to be 21, so I don't think I'm all that young anymore.  ?

Wow, crap, sorry! I just realized I didn't answer your actual question at all.

Quote from: Sharky on November 08, 2011, 10:23:19 PMWow, crap, sorry! I just realized I didn't answer your actual question at all.

No, your advise was still helpful.  It's helpful to know people's opinions on this.

Something else I wanted to through out there for you, as it was something that came up after I responded. I know the feeling of having not-so-accepting family, but your family might surprise you. I tested the subject with my grandmother, and, without revealing anything about me, she just laughed and said 'if they were in my family, I wouldn't care if they had two extra arms glued to their face. They are still family!'

That being said, I know my dad won't be as accepting, but my southern belle baptist grandmother for all intents was very supportive. Some of your family my surprise you in their response when and if you chose to come out to them.

But, I also like to think that we have our own little family here, even though we are seperated by experiences, countries, and whatever else.

Quote from: JohnAlex on November 08, 2011, 09:29:53 PM
I don't know why people brought up the college and health care thing. 

Uh, maybe because they didn't know about your Kaiser coverage and were trying to be helpful? It's an issue for lots of people, and college can be the best opportunity for some younger folks to transition. I have a friend who never could have afforded to fund his top surgery--not for several years, that is--if it hadn't been covered by his student health insurance.

Quote from: JohnAlex on November 08, 2011, 09:29:53 PMAnd I'm going to be 21, so I don't think I'm all that young anymore.  ?

No offense, but a lot of therapists would say otherwise. If you were forty and had had a lot of time to think about it, this therapist might be less cautious.

Or not.

Quote from: Arch on November 08, 2011, 11:24:12 PMNo offense, but a lot of therapists would say otherwise. If you were forty and had had a lot of time to think about it, this therapist might be less cautious.

Or not.

Really?  See, that's interesting to me.   This is the kind of thing I wanted to know about.  because my therapist seemed to imply, or make me feel like, because I didn't know I was trans when I was a little kid, that makes me less convincing.  I mean, he was telling me about his other patients who he wrote letters for, and one of them was apparently really young, but since his parents were on board and the kid had shown signs of being trans from infancy, he wrote the letter for the kid.

So here I am feeling like if I had only known when I was younger, then I'd be more convincing.


and idk... I just don't know if I like him.  He made a few comments I didn't like.  But this is why I'm asking people for perspective.  Sometimes my expectation do not reflect reality.
I wanted a therapist who was totally on my side.  They believed me about being trans, and they wanted to help me as much as they could.  kind of like my high school adviser/counselor who also ran the high school GSA.   Maybe I had a completely wrong idea of what a therapists job is.
I wanted him to be accepting and make me feel like I could trust him and he has my best interests in mind.  things like that.

Instead, he made me feel like a very unconvincing transgender.  He asked questions which made me feel stupid for not already knowing the answer.
And then he asked me what my sexual orientation is.  and I told him the truth which is that I'm confused.  I sort of identify as asexual or pansexual, because I have a sex drive of zero and I've never dated someone, but I'm not against dating someone.  And he was all like disappointed in me or something for still being confused about my sexual orientation.  He said I'd need to figure that out first. 
And I asked, "why does that matter?"  And he was very blunt in saying, "Because when you date someone you're going to have to tell them that you don't have a penis."

I'm still lost on how my sexual orientation is relevant to starting T.  And I felt awkward about how blunt he was with that statement.  I'm not worried about dating right now.  I'm not going to be like, "oh, shoot, you're right.  I don't have a penis.  I guess I better stay a girl then." 
Idk, I think even just saying, "You don't have a penis."  Is kinda rude to say it like that.  It's like, thanks for pointing out that fact I try to forget all the time.


Oh and, he kept calling me "she" until I told him to call me "he."  I was bothered that I even had to ask.  It's not like he didn't know I was trans.  Or maybe I'm just used to the LGBT club at my college where I don't even tell people I'm trans, and they just can tell I am, and they call me "he" with out me even saying anything.


And I'm sorry this is even longer than my OP, I just really don't know what to think of him.  I need opinions.

This guy wears me out, and I didn't even have a session with him! He doesn't sound very knowledgeable or supportive.

Other people might have a different opinion/experience, but it's very important to me to "click" with my therapist. I've been in therapy a number of other times before, and I never did click...I just kept seeing people I didn't feel comfortable with. I didn't know that you're supposed to find a compatible therapist; there wasn't a lot of readily available info on therapists for me to access back then. Then I found my current psychologist, who is a great match for me. I trust him, and I've made all sorts of progress.

If you don't feel the need for self-exploration and just want to get letters, then this guy might work. But his six-month minimum troubles me. If you have issues to work through, then he doesn't sound very promising. Lots of people don't have their sexuality all figured out before they realize that they are trans. Lots of us don't know from childhood that we're trans. And we ALL deserve the correct pronouns, right from the first visit.

Honestly, I think you should try shopping around. You deserve someone who "gets" you and shows you respect.

Okay.  Thanks for the response, Arch.   I think that's what I'll do then.

is there any reason not to straight up ask the therapist over email/online contact how long they would need to see you before they could provide the letter, before you even make your first appointment with them? be a good way to feel out who knew what the letter was, etc, as well.

Quote from: spacerace on November 11, 2011, 03:36:21 PM
is there any reason not to straight up ask the therapist over email/online contact how long they would need to see you before they could provide the letter, before you even make your first appointment with them? be a good way to feel out who knew what the letter was, etc, as well.

I would consider that a huge 'no.' If I were a therapist, I think that I would less inclined to give a letter from someone who is asking me outright for one. To me, It just smacks of semi-extortion.

When set up my appointment with my therapist, I asked if she adhered to WPATH standards, and let her know that I was a FtM who wanted to take the first steps toward transition. I left it at that. I talked to her on Thursday, and she set me up with an appointment on Monday, so I guess I made a good impression.

I wouldn't phrase it in the 'I am seeing you to get hormones' sort of way, but more like you would like to begin taking steps toward transition and toward learning more about yourself.

Quote from: Ayden on November 11, 2011, 05:18:56 PM
When set up my appointment with my therapist, I asked if she adhered to WPATH standards, and let her know that I was a FtM who wanted to take the first steps toward transition. I left it at that. I talked to her on Thursday, and she set me up with an appointment on Monday, so I guess I made a good impression.

I wouldn't phrase it in the 'I am seeing you to get hormones' sort of way, but more like you would like to begin taking steps toward transition and toward learning more about yourself.

Yea, of course you need to tell them that when your setting up your initial sessions. If you don't they'll just ask you anyway.

But for me, I would consider asking about hormones to forward. Although it might just be me, I wouldn't chance it either way. I agree with above, if you ask if they adhere to WPATH you have some indication of when your going to get your body pumped full off hormones.

Well I did exactly that.  I emailed him before I ever saw him and I told him that I want to see a therapist for the sole reason of getting a letter.  And I asked him how long he wanted to see me before he would write the letter. 

I just wanted to be upfront about it.  because I'm not trying to fool anyway, that is the truth, that is the ONLY reason why I would see a therapist.  I don't really think I have issues to work out.

I don't think it sounds like extortion.  I mean, I'm paying him and all I want him to do is write a letter confirming for the world that I am trans.  And if he sees me for a few months and decides that I am not trans, then I guess he won't write the letter. 

Quote from: Guantanamera on November 11, 2011, 04:22:29 PM
I would consider that a huge 'no.' If I were a therapist, I think that I would be less inclined to give a letter from someone who is asking me outright for one. To me, It just smacks of semi-extortion.

Well, it's not really extortion at all. you are paying them to provide a service for you...that service may be to work some stuff out, or it may be to get a letter. I don't see any problem with both people knowing what you after exactly being an issue. Especially in his case, as he wants to get in and get out. Not saying that upfront would almost be more deceptive, no?

Quote from: JohnAlex on November 11, 2011, 10:30:47 PM
Well I did exactly that.  I emailed him before I ever saw him and I told him that I want to see a therapist for the sole reason of getting a letter.  And I asked him how long he wanted to see me before he would write the letter. 

I just wanted to be upfront about it.  because I'm not trying to fool anyway, that is the truth, that is the ONLY reason why I would see a therapist.  I don't really think I have issues to work out.

I don't think it sounds like extortion.  I mean, I'm paying him and all I want him to do is write a letter confirming for the world that I am trans.  And if he sees me for a few months and decides that I am not trans, then I guess he won't write the letter. 

Good luck.

Quote from: spacerace on November 11, 2011, 10:46:48 PM
Well, it's not really extortion at all. you are paying them to provide a service for you...that service may be to work some stuff out, or it may be to get a letter. I don't see any problem with both people knowing what you after exactly being an issue. Especially in his case, as he wants to get in and get out. Not saying that upfront would almost be more deceptive, no?

That is, from the point of view of the therapist. To the therapist, you're coming to sessions to resolve your feeling of dysphoria. Their service is to help you work out your transition plan (if any), and not to provide you access to medication. Consider when you go to the doctor, you don't ask for specific health care treatment, you present a problem to the physician and you guys work out the best solution of you. What do you think would happen if you contacted a doctor asking for adderall or opiates to treat some problem they have no knowledge about? They would think that you're trying to con them into something that you won't, which might have serious repercussions for them. Therapists are professionals just like doctors, and I think that both of those groups would consider that at least a little extortionary.

Now as for the deceptiveness of disguising what you really want, I wouldn't consider it an issue. If you come to the therapist presenting as a transsexual who wants to transition, they would assume that you would want access to these drugs. I would consider it an open secret really. But the point of the matter is that asking directly for access to these drugs is usurping the discretion of the professional, and I think that they would interpret this as both an affront to their authority as professionals and as a possible threat to their livelihood. (From malpractice suits.)

Most of the time Ethics can't be successfully interpreted in Economic terms in the real world. You'll just behave like an ->-bleeped-<-  ;)

Quote from: Guantanamera on November 11, 2011, 11:27:40 PM

Most of the time Ethics can't be successfully interpreted in Economic terms in the real world. You'll just behave like an ->-bleeped-<-  ;)

Going to therapist to get the letter to get T in the first place is part of the required dance. To me, it seems like he wants the letter, not to "work out" if he's trans or not.

Asking upfront saves everyone time, sorry you think it makes me an ->-bleeped-<-, I'm not, I'm just straight forward.

Quote from: spacerace on November 11, 2011, 11:36:52 PM
Going to therapist to get the letter to get T in the first place is part of the required dance. To me, it seems like he wants the letter, not to "work out" if he's trans or not.

Asking upfront saves everyone time, sorry you think it makes me an ->-bleeped-<-, I'm not, I'm just straight forward.

Of course the majority of us only go to therapists to get the letter, if not, wht pratt on about yourself for an hour to someone in a tweed vest who's silently judging you? (Again, I'm speaking from the perspective of the therapist. They do have to diagnose you first before they'll give you any letter of any sort.)

Having, the dancing is required for good reason, it exists to weed out people so that those who don't really want to Tango instead of Salsa for the rest of their lives don't make a mistake and blame other people on it.

I doubt whether it would save anyone's time, most therapists adhere to WPATH. And so in either case the earliest your going to be getting hormones is ~3 months or so. (Besides, it's not as though you can take the letter and run unless your non-op)

I never said that being forward made you or anyone else an ->-bleeped-<-, just that interpreting ethics from an economical perspective often leads people to act like ->-bleeped-<-s. I never conjectured as to whether or not you or anyone has/does do that. However, most people who describe themselves as 'straight forward' do leave an unsavory taste in my mouth, although that's probably a result of how deferential and laid back I am.

Quote from: Guantanamera on November 11, 2011, 11:57:52 PM
Of course the majority of us only go to therapists to get the letter, if not, wht pratt on about yourself for an hour to someone in a tweed vest who's silently judging you? (Again, I'm speaking from the perspective of the therapist. They do have to diagnose you first before they'll give you any letter of any sort.)

Having, the dancing is required for good reason, it exists to weed out people so that those who don't really want to Tango instead of Salsa for the rest of their lives don't make a mistake and blame other people on it.

I doubt whether it would save anyone's time, most therapists adhere to WPATH. And so in either case the earliest your going to be getting hormones is ~3 months or so. (Besides, it's not as though you can take the letter and run unless your non-op)

I never said that being forward made you or anyone else an ->-bleeped-<-, just that interpreting ethics from an economical perspective often leads people to act like ->-bleeped-<-s. I never conjectured as to whether or not you or anyone has/does do that. However, most people who describe themselves as 'straight forward' do leave an unsavory taste in my mouth, although that's probably a result of how deferential and laid back I am.

I would rather be straight forward and open and easy-going than any number of negative alternatives :) So I guess sorry I leave a bad taste in your mouth? I don't see how that is relevant, and I certainly didn't mean to offend you. so, let's start over. Hi, I'm spacerace, nice to meet you. By straight forward, I only mean, you will always know where you stand with me and I won't tip toe around issues or make you guess my intentions.

Back on topic. Point is - Bottom line, an initial therapy session is easily 150 dollars....each. If you are needing to shop around to find someone will work with you to get a letter and you want 3 months not 6 months, better to ask him upfront, prior to giving him the 150 and wasting his time and yours, how long he usually takes to feel comfortable recommending you and writing the letter.

The alternative is that you don't ask, spend the 150 dollars, have him say 6 months, or worse, a year - only have to have that be unacceptable, and have to spend time and another 150 dollars to go see someone else with an initial session.

In my experience, I was able to find a really awesome therapist through the local college. (They have to deal with so much freaky ->-bleeped-<- that I'm probably normal to them anyway.)

Besides from that, and returning to the original topic, great places to find good therapists include:Local LGBT center, Colleges, and other trans people you meet at the center.

Unless you live in some crazy metropolitan area (and would have a ton of information online) hay are only so many qualified gender therapists in your area. If you ask around, you can get a good feel for their style, and how long it usually takes to get your letter. I would generally prefer this method, but then again I'm have a lot of social anxiety relating to my anxiety so perhaps that's just me.

Quote from: Guantanamera on November 11, 2011, 11:57:52 PM
I doubt whether it would save anyone's time, most therapists adhere to WPATH. And so in either case the earliest your going to be getting hormones is ~3 months or so. (Besides, it's not as though you can take the letter and run unless your non-op)

Good point about surgery letters, but I've heard that a few top surgeons don't require letters under certain circumstances. In addition, I know several people IRL who got a hormone letter (and in one case a surgery letter as well) after very few visits, even one or two. WPATH does not require three months, so some clients get their hormone letters pretty fast.

Quote from: Guantanamera on November 11, 2011, 11:57:52 PM
I doubt whether it would save anyone's time, most therapists adhere to WPATH. And so in either case the earliest your going to be getting hormones is ~3 months or so. (Besides, it's not as though you can take the letter and run unless your non-op)

Not true, a number of people got there letter in the first or second appointment. 

Quote from: LordKAT on November 12, 2011, 07:26:07 PM
Not true, a number of people got there letter in the first or second appointment.

Have you read the WPATH standards?

It strongly recommends a waiting period for all people to get HRT, except in the case of those individuals who are already presenting in their correct gender identity. So these people may have simply 'checked' into the therapist to get their letters, but for the majority of us who are not at least part time when we seek counseling we have to wait it out.

Also, the therapist might have simply not cared about WPATH or is following a different standard of care.

I'm not suggesting that the waiting period is mandatory for all people, or even mandatory at all, but that the majority of counselors follow the standards and that under their prescription a majority of people will have to wait.

Quote from: Arch on November 12, 2011, 02:03:31 AM
WPATH does not require three months, so some clients get their hormone letters pretty fast.

this ^^.

Very strongly suggested but not mandated. It's always up to the discretion of the counselor.

I have read the standards and the revised standards and a great many things. The answer remains the same.

Quote from: LordKAT on November 12, 2011, 08:48:06 PM
I have read the standards and the revised standards and a great many things. The answer remains the same.

Yes, I was agreeing with you that it is certainly a distinct possibility lol.

Any update on the therapist in question?

Personally, I would highly doubt a therapist that would just write you a letter for a body-altering, life-changing prescription on the first visit ... or the second visit ...

I think therapists certainly have a responsibility to their clients to (1) get to the bottom of root causes through accepted psychological diagnosis (2) evaluate you from a non-judgmental perspective, and (3) suggest a treatment plan. All the while they should fully take an interest in assisting you to get (mentally) healthy.

If you're going in expecting the treatment plan from the get-go, and getting it, that's a little alarming to me. It's not like a prescription of Xanax (although don't get me started on that ...) you are seeking to change your life (irrevocably) and the therapist just seems like he's doing his job by trying to evaluate you further and then offer your treatment plan.

The thing about you having to come out to all your family is a little dodgy - unless you're under 18. If you're over 18, you're legal, and that shouldn't be a requirement. 

I also wanted to add that just because you're paying a therapist doesn't just "buy" you whatever you want. They're in the medical field and do have to adhere to professional standards. Any medical professional that can be be "bought" is not someone who's very trustworthy or concerned about the client's health if you ask me.

Lastly, what child knows the trans diagnosis? I mean, I didn't find out that existed until I was mid teens as well. But if you had experiences you could relate to the therapist, that would back up the diagnosis. Children do not just go, "I'm trans!" until they're older and they discover that it's an actual "thing" and usually when they do, that's when the light bulb goes on in their minds like, "ohhh that explains it". A really good therapist experienced with gender issues already knows this and doesn't expect the person to be self-aware that they were trans from day 1. But in relating your experiences honestly to the therapist, they can certainly see patterns forming and be able to make an evaluation.

Quote from: insideontheoutside on November 13, 2011, 01:43:30 AM

Lastly, what child knows the trans diagnosis? I mean, I didn't find out that existed until I was mid teens as well. But if you had experiences you could relate to the therapist, that would back up the diagnosis. Children do not just go, "I'm trans!" until they're older and they discover that it's an actual "thing" and usually when they do, that's when the light bulb goes on in their minds like, "ohhh that explains it". A really good therapist experienced with gender issues already knows this and doesn't expect the person to be self-aware that they were trans from day 1. But in relating your experiences honestly to the therapist, they can certainly see patterns forming and be able to make an evaluation.

This ^^

I doubted for a long time my validity as a trans woman because I didn't ever say the phrase 'I'm a transexual' out lout to myself until I was ~17 or so. However, when I started recounting the facts of my childhood, and remembering some things that I had forgotten, it was plain as day that I exhibited symptoms of GID for almost as long as I can remember.

If you have some relevant memories to throw out, that would give the counselor more evidence to base their diagnosis on. It couldn't hurt in either case.

QuoteChildren do not just go, "I'm trans!" until they're older and they discover that it's an actual "thing" and usually when they do, that's when the light bulb goes on in their minds like, "ohhh that explains it".

Well, they might not call themselves trans...but some call themselves boys and girls before they know anything about trans. I suspect that you were talking about children's awareness of treatment possibilities, yes?

Quote from: Arch on November 13, 2011, 01:49:10 PM
Well, they might not call themselves trans...but some call themselves boys and girls before they know anything about trans. I suspect that you were talking about children's awareness of treatment possibilities, yes?

Yes - and the actual terminology used (trans, transgender, transsexual)