Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Am I the only one bothered by this term? Because if you go by it, I can be in a gay and straight relationship at the same time. Unless I date another transperson, of course. Which is just confusing. 

...or am I the only one that's ever thought about it?
I guess it's the same for same-sex marriage.

Imagine it, "we're having a same-sex marriage, but we're straight." or "we're gay but we're gonna get married in TEXAS! hell yeah." On the other hand, the latter one sounds kinda awesome, just to piss off all of the annoying homo/transpobic hillbillies. (not saying everyone in Texas in a hillbilly. Just some, since they don't allow same-sex marriage there.)

If it's still illegal in Texas when I want to get married, I'm going to marry there, just to irritate the registrar.

lol, this is why i'm glad i don't live in texas

Well if I was with a girl, it's be a straight relationship to me, and if I was with a dude (cis or ftm) I would consider it to be a gay relationship. I don't think the former would be considered a same sex relationship unless I didn't get my gender marker changed, or the state was just one of those states that doesn't accept trans people as their regular gender.

I think its fairly safe to assume most if not all trans men identify their bodies as male. In that way a relationship between a trans man and cis man is a same sex relationship.

Also, since a person might not identify as gay, it's not defining their sexual orientation.

I agree with Nygeel a transman sees himself as a man. So the only way its a same sex relationship is if he's with another man be it trans or cis man.

Quote from: Wesley_33 on November 10, 2011, 06:49:34 AM
I agree with Nygeel a transman sees himself as a man. So the only way its a same sex relationship is if he's with another man be it trans or cis man.

Not what I said. If you identify your body as male regardless of what doctors say it is then you are male and male identified.

Man=/=male

My (ftm) boyfriend and I always say we are the ultimate gay couple. Since we started out as a lesbian couple and ended up as a gay couple.

Nathan - Let's run down the checklist...

L? Check
G? Check
B? Check
T? Check

Yup, I think you guys won.

Hahah, that's awesome, never even looked at it like that xD

if I ever got this "strange idea" of getting marrige, then I probebly would go to Sweden.
we dont have gay marrige (not yet) in my country, we got registered partnership but for me, thats not the same.

however I thought about it its kinda messed up, if I now marry a women then it would be illegal,
if I marry a man then I can do so but it would be "like a man and a women" ew

and if I marry after chancing my registered gender then a man would be illegal but a women would be okey.

logical??

Natkat - I can't say how many times I've made this point about the laws regarding us when it comes to lawful marriages.  I'm married now to a woman.  The law in my state says that if I change gender markers while in my marriage, it will not be dissolved, but if we get divorced, I will only be allowed to marry men.  Every aspect of who I'm allowed to marry is based on where I'm at with legal red tape in my transition and potentially whether I fell in love before transitioning.  Extremely ->-bleeped-<-ed up.

But as someone once pointed out, if you scream this from atop a mountain, the people who oppose same-sex marriage would just say that trans people should not be allowed to marry anyone and if someone married decides to transition, the marriage is immediately dissolved.  Problem solved, right?

I don't care either way.

But I know a lot of gay men and they should be able to marry each other and stuff.

I heard something about where I live that if transgender people should get there gender mark in sociaty chance then there not allowed to do so if there already marrige,

so they must seach for divorce and get marrige again,
its kinda f** up because if you are ftm marrige to a man and then you get a divorce to be a man then you cant get marrige?
its only really posible as I see it if your wasnt "marrige for real" in the first place.. like registered partnership, between 2 men or women,
and then chance your gender into a "straight couple" to marry as a man and a women..

man.. I dont even get marrige in the first place and all this rules just confusses me even more..

I am happy in my country (Spain) same sex marriages are allowed. Anyway my bf has officially changed his gender, so, if sometimes we would get married, it would be a "classic" heterosexual marriage.

When we met, I didn´t know he was FtM so I considered our relationship as heterosexual. After realizing he was FtM I started thinking about ourselves as a lesbian couple and felt uncomfortable about that because I had never been attracted to girls. Suddenly, I realized I didn´t mean if we were heterosexual or homosexual.

Some of the most hurtful words I hear from cispeople relate to the fact that I date guys. When people I'm out to casually refer to me as "heterosexual," it's to me just proof that they don't accept me. When people ask me over and over why bother transitioning if I want to sleep with men, or say I'm not really a man if I don't get distracted by every busty woman who walks by, I just want to give up. I want to crawl in a hole and accept that people will never see me as I am, or ever take my words at face value and understand my honesty when I call myself male.

Being hit on by heterosexual males I'm out to is also a little disorienting.

I still sleep with a hetero guy. He's proud to be a little gay, at least for a little while. Lol it gives him liberal cred and a little bit of street smarts and culture. But it is something to think about.