Susan's Place Transgender Resources

http://www.morphthing.com/ (http://www.morphthing.com/)


I'm always telling you ladies that you look like certain celebrities.  I thought you'd have fun with this site.   You can add your picture and pictures of celebrities and the site will morph it together.

Or maybe we should be proud of the faces we have and not aim to look like completely different people/ the cis women our community obsesses over looking like.
I've never been a fan of comparing ourselves to cis women at the rate that we do- especially when it comes to physical appearance. 
I think we need to, in a way, accept ourselves as women and work with what we can. Cis women are not above us. The whole "you look like this celebrity" has been cute, but morphing our beautiful transgender faces with those of cis women/ at all is where I personally draw the line.
Mixie, i think you are awesome and have alot of encouraging things to say and have brought alot to this forum already, but i am not a fan of this thread.

I actually thought some people would like it ambitiously.  But I also think you are taking it way too seriously.  You can morph your face with Chewbacca, Golem and Shrek if you want to as well.  It's supposed to be a fun thing,  I kinda understand a teensy bit of what you are saying but I can't say I really get it based on the site itself.

Meh, I don't see anything wrong with the thread. Its meant to just be a fun thing, I'm sure. Not another way to tell us we are less than or something.


And if I were going to morph myself, I'd most likely do it with a pic of me and my dog as we have similar hair color and long snouts.  :P

Quote from: mixie on February 07, 2012, 10:31:23 PM
I actually thought some people would like it ambitiously.  But I also think you are taking it way too seriously.  You can morph your face with Chewbacca, Golem and Shrek if you want to as well.  It's supposed to be a fun thing,  I kinda understand a teensy bit of what you are saying but I can't say I really get it based on the site itself.

Our lives/transitions are serious. As a cis women yourself, you may have fun morphing your face with another, but on a forum such as this I think you need to check yourself.

*Edit*
so basically, i take issue with the whole cis women comparison work you do here in general at times and I do think this thread takes it too far for me.

lol, me and my doggy, Jake.


came out pretty good I thought.


(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2F3f10eff48b22b21020f09c926eb21164%2F0%2F44154995%2FDSCN4192b-JPG--Picture-50-jpg.jpeg&hash=6629ee0016bc0dba85eab884393ac5a53016c736) (http://www.morphthing.com/image/44154995-DSCN4192b-JPG-Picture-50-jpg?key=3f10eff48b22b21020f09c926eb21164)

Do I pass?   

Quote from: Jaime on February 07, 2012, 11:10:48 PM
lol, me and my doggy, Jake.


came out pretty good I thought.


(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2F3f10eff48b22b21020f09c926eb21164%2F0%2F44154995%2FDSCN4192b-JPG--Picture-50-jpg.jpeg&hash=6629ee0016bc0dba85eab884393ac5a53016c736) (http://www.morphthing.com/image/44154995-DSCN4192b-JPG-Picture-50-jpg?key=3f10eff48b22b21020f09c926eb21164)

I think it's adorable looking.

Quote from: Malachite on February 07, 2012, 11:16:14 PM
I think it's adorable looking.

Thanks, I feel all furrilicious now.  :D

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 07, 2012, 10:54:44 PM
Our lives/transitions are serious. As a cis women yourself, you may have fun morphing your face with another, but on a forum such as this I think you need to check yourself.

*Edit*
so basically, i take issue with the whole cis women comparison work you do here in general at times and I do think this thread takes it too far for me.

I think you're being a bit harsh on her. You are the one making this so much about trans vs. cis.  I did not get the impression that she was doing anything but saying that some women here remind her of some celebrities and this was a way to see just how much or even go into a silly direction as I did. 

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 07, 2012, 10:28:09 PM
Or maybe we should be proud of the faces we have and not aim to look like completely different people/ the cis women our community obsesses over looking like.
I've never been a fan of comparing ourselves to cis women at the rate that we do- especially when it comes to physical appearance. 
I think we need to, in a way, accept ourselves as women and work with what we can. Cis women are not above us. The whole "you look like this celebrity" has been cute, but morphing our beautiful transgender faces with those of cis women/ at all is where I personally draw the line.
Mixie, i think you are awesome and have alot of encouraging things to say and have brought alot to this forum already, but i am not a fan of this thread.

I can see where you're coming from but at the same time personally I prefer to be compared to cis women, otherwise it feels like it's the special olympics or something  :-\



Anyway

After reading another mixie thread like a week ago or something I told my bf I couldn't think of any celebrities I look like. Then I kinda thought I had similar features to Britney Spears, so anyway I tried it:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2F93580782102bb7fbe3bac02eb1a8ed9d%2F0%2F44156685%2Fme-jpg--Britney-Spears.jpeg&hash=8b29dac30c63b8dd0f9ee3f28ffa6f5822d7a46e)


I think it looks different though anyway (plus I would rather look like a less melodramatic celeb  ::) )

Well darn, I'm curious about what you look like on your own now. I don't recall seeing a pic of you.

Quote from: Jaime on February 08, 2012, 01:19:03 AM
Well darn, I'm curious about what you look like on your own now. I don't recall seeing a pic of you.

I posted 'em a couple times before but I don't really take many since I am still pre-everything  :(

I mixed myself with Lauren Laverne, was fun.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2F99aeb36ae36f9a427e9c1ad4d4ca9f1d%2F0%2F44158105%2FPhoto-on-2012-02-08-at-07-41-jpg--v0-master-jpg.jpeg&hash=7bf197c470d3f793c183e17ead0b8dfb776ceb08)

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 07, 2012, 10:54:44 PM
Our lives/transitions are serious. As a cis women yourself, you may have fun morphing your face with another, but on a forum such as this I think you need to check yourself.

*Edit*
so basically, i take issue with the whole cis women comparison work you do here in general at times and I do think this thread takes it too far for me.

I think there is something very very valuable in here.   But I can't quite understand what you are saying.  Please don't worry about offending me.  If you have something to say be straight forward, it's more helpful that way.  Please remember that the last thing I would want to do would be to offend anyone.


But I will point out this.  The only reason I compared transwomen to cis women at all was because of the "Do I pass thread."   I"ve said many times I think you are all beautiful exactly as is.   It's when people start harping on someone's jaw line or brows or some other thing I started posting celebrities that had similar features.  And that's celebrities,  people with stylists, make up artists etc.    I have always said I think most people here look like regular women.

So I'm not quite getting why you think I'm the one forcing the comparisions on you when it's you tearing each other apart that caused me to do it in the first place.

Second,  if you are saying that transsexual female identity has a special place in the world that should be honored,   I would agree with you but only if the transsexual female wanted to be identified that way.  There are many transsexual females that want to be "women" without the labels beyond it.  So I'm not sure I'd agree with you about putting people into separate categories.   


Jaime your picture was adorable!  LOL

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 07, 2012, 10:54:44 PM
Our lives/transitions are serious. As a cis women yourself, you may have fun morphing your face with another, but on a forum such as this I think you need to check yourself.

*Edit*
so basically, i take issue with the whole cis women comparison work you do here in general at times and I do think this thread takes it too far for me.

Oh, go get a sense of humour.

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 07, 2012, 10:28:09 PM
Or maybe we should be proud of the faces we have and not aim to look like completely different people/ the cis women our community obsesses over looking like.
I've never been a fan of comparing ourselves to cis women at the rate that we do- especially when it comes to physical appearance. 
I think we need to, in a way, accept ourselves as women and work with what we can. Cis women are not above us. The whole "you look like this celebrity" has been cute, but morphing our beautiful transgender faces with those of cis women/ at all is where I personally draw the line.
Mixie, i think you are awesome and have alot of encouraging things to say and have brought alot to this forum already, but i am not a fan of this thread.

Seriously? Maybe you should just not reply in it if you're so unhappy about it

That site is pretty fun to play with, what's your issue with it?

Well, I had a play and a giggle, and that's good enough for me.

Quote from: mixie on February 08, 2012, 08:53:13 AM

I think there is something very very valuable in here.   But I can't quite understand what you are saying.  Please don't worry about offending me.  If you have something to say be straight forward, it's more helpful that way.  Please remember that the last thing I would want to do would be to offend anyone.

Okay.

Quote

But I will point out this.  The only reason I compared transwomen to cis women at all was because of the "Do I pass thread."   I"ve said many times I think you are all beautiful exactly as is.   It's when people start harping on someone's jaw line or brows or some other thing I started posting celebrities that had similar features.  And that's celebrities,  people with stylists, make up artists etc.    I have always said I think most people here look like regular women.

We are trans women. I do not think there should be anything wrong with looking like a trans woman and that is the message i want to send out. Why? because there are trans women who may never have passing privileges. By comparing us to celebrities with stylists who you define as "regular women" that have similar features is kind of feeding into the problematics of passing as cis. Alot of people want that here, but it's not my activism. This is the work i do.

Quote
So I'm not quite getting why you think I'm the one forcing the comparisions on you when it's you tearing each other apart that caused me to do it in the first place.

cis woman to the rescue.  ::).

Your focus in this forum isn't all bad, but the "cis woman celebrity" rhetoric you use in the do i pass threads and in threads out of the do i pass thread can be problematic for me and does offend me as a trans woman who identifies as a trans woman. I may have some features of a cis women, but I am not a cis woman.

Quote
Second,  if you are saying that transsexual female identity has a special place in the world that should be honored,   I would agree with you but only if the transsexual female wanted to be identified that way.  There are many transsexual females that want to be "women" without the labels beyond it.  So I'm not sure I'd agree with you about putting people into separate categories.   

"Want to be women" WE ARE.
Honestly, this was exceptionalism, used against me as a trans woman, to deny your cisgender privilege, coming in here like ya know what's up, wanting to help and ~doing it the wrong way~ Ofcourse I recognize that some trans women don't want to be tied to their "trans" identities but how does that help empower transgender bodies that don't have passing privileges? It doesn't. It's wonderful that you march in trans spaces to tell us we look like regular women and to stop nitpicking, but please realize where you stand as a privileged cis woman. I've seen you talk about how some people identified you as trans in your life, which means you aren't as privileged, but you are still cis.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2F0ac58e036faf4919f64bef48a41bf0c0%2F0%2F44171080%2F10150530808717759--s28049284612989963-jpg.jpeg&hash=de58ffaeafdba766655501834441abfbc3b6787d)

I couldn't help but have a go.  I love model Doutzen Kroes.  This is me and her combined.

  Lol this thing is fun to play with, thanks for posting Mixie!  :D

Torn1990, you're derailing. If you have something personal against mixie I'm sure the rest of the folks on this thread would appreciate it if you took it elsewhere.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2F20da3548deed23f709328df4fc5f64e7%2F0%2F44183702%2FMe-face-jpg--Scarlett-Johansson.jpeg&hash=b64cddc3d530ee8c4459d1320d4bef61a31a20e2)

I mixed with Scarlett Johansson.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2Fe3c8c5923fca4d427c0bdc8781efff9b%2F0%2F44187442%2FSeptember-2011-jpg--Cate-Blanchett.jpeg&hash=4052ab80d3d84617c3ff4d11d1191612130bb8c6) (http://www.morphthing.com/image/44187442-September-2011-jpg-Cate-Blanchett?key=e3c8c5923fca4d427c0bdc8781efff9b)

Me and Cate Blanchett

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 08, 2012, 02:51:31 PM
Okay.
We are trans women. I do not think there should be anything wrong with looking like a trans woman and that is the message i want to send out. Why? because there are trans women who may never have passing privileges. By comparing us to celebrities with stylists who you define as "regular women" that have similar features is kind of feeding into the problematics of passing as cis. Alot of people want that here, but it's not my activism. This is the work i do.

cis woman to the rescue.  ::).

Your focus in this forum isn't all bad, but the "cis woman celebrity" rhetoric you use in the do i pass threads and in threads out of the do i pass thread can be problematic for me and does offend me as a trans woman who identifies as a trans woman. I may have some features of a cis women, but I am not a cis woman.

"Want to be women" WE ARE.
Honestly, this was exceptionalism, used against me as a trans woman, to deny your cisgender privilege, coming in here like ya know what's up, wanting to help and ~doing it the wrong way~ Ofcourse I recognize that some trans women don't want to be tied to their "trans" identities but how does that help empower transgender bodies that don't have passing privileges? It doesn't. It's wonderful that you march in trans spaces to tell us we look like regular women and to stop nitpicking, but please realize where you stand as a privileged cis woman. I've seen you talk about how some people identified you as trans in your life, which means you aren't as privileged, but you are still cis.

So it's like you want me to acknowledge that you are different but then if I do I'm being discriminating?   Sorry Torn that's your own baggage.  I don't think you have a right to speak for all transwomen that way.    You can say you want to be a transwoman but some other women will say they don't want to be identified as a transwoman but as a "woman."   They might resent the suggestion that there is a difference between trans and cis.  I am not going to be able to make everyone happy.  I try to be as respectful as possible.   


Some people think some things are empowerment movements and some people just want to live their lives.  A transwoman is not automatically attached to the "cause" of being a transwoman unless she chooses to be.   And it seems you do.   So good for you.   

I'm do not agree with many of the observations about passing on this site.  I do think it's people's own dysphoria being projected onto other people at times.  And I'm not quite sure what you think is so wrong about me suggesting styles of looks to people?   


Finally I don't get the whole "cisgender to the rescue" commment?  What exactly am I supposedly thinking I'm rescuing you from?   And why precisely would I ever think I would be the one to do it?

I'm glad you shared.   But one thing you and I will just have to disagree on is that I don't have a lot of respect for people who try to turn everything into a political cause and jam it down everyone else's throat.   I've seen posts on other sites where black women treat white women the same way you are treating me here.  I know I asked you to be open and I appreciate you doing so.  But I'm not going to be your personal punching bag on here for all the resentment and anger you want to teach the world a lesson with.

As far as my "cis priviledge"   passing is obviously easier for me.   And living as  a woman is easier.   But that doesn't mean that my life is easier.   Or that I somehow don't have struggles in my own life.

I am hearing impaired and go about my life every day not being able to hear.   I wear hearing aids that are not covered by medical insurance and cost around $2,000 each.    One of the reasons I have my own business is that I cannot get a job because I cannot hear people in the job interviews.  Every second of my life "out in the real world"  is dedicated to trying to understand other people,  trying to pay attention.   It is exhausting and draining.  Oh and you try going through a semester of college having to memorize via lip reading everything the professors are saying in class because you can't look down to take notes or you won't be able to "hear" what is being said.

I would never tell hearing people that they have "hearing privilege"  or resent them for doing so.   I work with what I have,  I do my best in life,  I struggle but I am happy.


I wish you and everyone else the same. 

Everyone's pictures look really cool.  I think it's a fun site.   I tried doing Charlize Theron before but I don't have a full front on picture so it came out weird.  You can also blend other celebrities.



:D

 If you don't understand my cis women to the rescue comment, i'm not surprised. Coming in here as a cis woman wanting to help us is what i mean. There's no problem with it, but at the same time there is. You explained away your cis privilege by telling me how you also have struggles in life. Yah OK. Or you can take the criticism. "But that doesn't mean that my life is easier." YES IT DOES! Yeah everyone has their issues, but on this forum your cis privilege is extremely apparent.

Quote
Some people think some things are empowerment movements and some people just want to live their lives.  A transwoman is not automatically attached to the "cause" of being a transwoman unless she chooses to be.   And it seems you do.   So good for you.

wow good for me? cis person thinking trans people can just live their lives and ignore discrimination, and the fact that transphobia is the cause of gender violence every day! But as a cis person i guess you have the ability to think that trans people can just live their lives and not care about trans politics. And saying that some trans women choose otherwise as attempting to minimize where i talk about trans politics is so offensive.

QuoteI've seen posts on other sites where black women treat white women the same way you are treating me here. "

Boo hoo, people of color have to take it on a daily basis, if a white person can't in a few posts it just shows how privileged they are. It also takes alot of privilege to explain away privilege...

QuoteAs far as my "cis priviledge"   passing is obviously easier for me.   And living as  a woman is easier.   But that doesn't mean that my life is easier.   Or that I somehow don't have struggles in my own life
I would never tell hearing people that they have "hearing privilege"  or resent them for doing so.   I work with what I have,  I do my best in life,  I struggle but I am happy.

  As a cis woman you can leave whenever you want. Understand your privilege, and as long as you want to visit here you should learn to accept some criticism.

Actually whether or not you want to tell people they have hearing privilege it's important for them to be aware of it so they know that how they may be acting can be offensive, or taking advantage of non hearing people around them.

how is privilege important? http://blog.shrub.com/archives/tekanji/2006-03-08_146 (http://blog.shrub.com/archives/tekanji/2006-03-08_146)  This is a good resource that updates itself alot so i wont just post content.

i disagree with the thread.
I think it's all fun when youre a cis person and can morph your face with that of a cis model
but when youre trans it is personal and why we are discriminated against.
I'm surprised you all don't see how that calls for privilege checking and politics

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 09, 2012, 01:12:25 PM
If you don't understand my cis women to the rescue comment, i'm not surprised. Coming in here as a cis woman wanting to help us is what i mean.

I did not.   Are you serious?  Is that how you take my comments.   I joined the site because I liked the people on here.   Do you know how many sites I join?

Maybe put two and two together and realize that deaf people often make friends online because they have a hard time making friends in real life because of communication issues.   

To be clear.  I DID NOT come to this site trying to help anyone.   That's a very patronizing reason to join a site.    And it's not how I roll.


But let me say this Torn,  you have no more right to criticize me for being "born this way"  than I do you.  So like I said,  check your own baggage and don't try to dump it off on me.   Because it's way off base.

Peace.


Also if you don't like the site don't use it.   I didn't start a thread called "Here's a great site for Torn!"   I posted it for everyone.  I sorta understand your stance but I think you need to look at your wording and stop pretending to speak for people that you don't.  If you don't like the site because you don't like it, then don't use it.  Other transwomen on here seem to think it's fine and even fun.  So obviously you don't speak for them.

I have found that many "activist type" people will hide behind using the "WE" terminology to circumvent speaking their own mind.  If that's how you feel about the site I apologize for it offending YOU.    But that's just you.  You don't represent everyone even if you think you do.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2F0fb4b7a4c339ba81ff7ec9a7042efca3%2F0%2F44199157%2Fbeepbeep-jpg--Kristen-Stewart.jpeg&hash=1b73b64cf0298531f6f75faf5fb4534de1a79b49) (http://www.morphthing.com/image/44199157-beepbeep-jpg-Kristen-Stewart?key=0fb4b7a4c339ba81ff7ec9a7042efca3)

Me morphed with Kristen Stewart(yes, the Twilight chick -_-)
lol if only i could look that female.

Quote from: JoeyD on February 09, 2012, 03:20:57 PM
lol if only i could look that female.

But you appear plenty female in your pics.  Trust me, I see lots of girls your age come into the store every day.

I think better wording would be "if I could only look more like that female."  But then everyone has their own desires about their looks, many days I look ugly as sin to myself while others are loudly proclaiming otherwise.

Quote from: mixie on February 09, 2012, 02:58:47 PM
I did not.   Are you serious?  Is that how you take my comments.   I joined the site because I liked the people on here.   Do you know how many sites I join?

Maybe put two and two together and realize that deaf people often make friends online because they have a hard time making friends in real life because of communication issues.   

To be clear.  I DID NOT come to this site trying to help anyone.   That's a very patronizing reason to join a site.    And it's not how I roll.


But let me say this Torn,  you have no more right to criticize me for being "born this way"  than I do you.  So like I said,  check your own baggage and don't try to dump it off on me.   Because it's way off base.

Peace.


Also if you don't like the site don't use it.   I didn't start a thread called "Here's a great site for Torn!"   I posted it for everyone.  I sorta understand your stance but I think you need to look at your wording and stop pretending to speak for people that you don't.  If you don't like the site because you don't like it, then don't use it.  Other transwomen on here seem to think it's fine and even fun.  So obviously you don't speak for them.

I have found that many "activist type" people will hide behind using the "WE" terminology to circumvent speaking their own mind.  If that's how you feel about the site I apologize for it offending YOU.    But that's just you.  You don't represent everyone even if you think you do.

WOW. This is too rich. Thanks alot and peace indeed.

Quote from: Jaime on February 09, 2012, 03:26:45 PM
But you appear plenty female in your pics.  Trust me, I see lots of girls your age come into the store every day.

I think better wording would be "if I could only look more like that female."  But then everyone has their own desires about their looks, many days I look ugly as sin to myself while others are loudly proclaiming otherwise.

I think that's a common thing.  I think Joey D is adorable and very pretty.   You also have a very pretty face, I liked the pix with the make up.  I think age has a lot to do with it.  When we are young we are often haunted by the "standards of beauty" we see around and get sucked into not being pretty enough or good enough.  As I got older I tended not to care as much about gaining weight or wrinkles etc.   I had botox years ago because I was so obsessed over my forehead wrinkles.  I lived in a Russian neighborhood at the time and there were spas and facial works places all over the place.  The women were also dressed to the nines in D&G and Channel and other really expensive clothing.   So for a little while.  I just gave into it.  Now I'm more laid back.   I'd like to care more about my appearance and try a bit more since my 40s are gonna be gone before I know it.

Quote from: mixie on February 09, 2012, 03:32:45 PM
I think that's a common thing.  I think Joey D is adorable and very pretty.   You also have a very pretty face, I liked the pix with the make up.  I think age has a lot to do with it.  When we are young we are often haunted by the "standards of beauty" we see around and get sucked into not being pretty enough or good enough.  As I got older I tended not to care as much about gaining weight or wrinkles etc.   I had botox years ago because I was so obsessed over my forehead wrinkles.  I lived in a Russian neighborhood at the time and there were spas and facial works places all over the place.  The women were also dressed to the nines in D&G and Channel and other really expensive clothing.   So for a little while.  I just gave into it.  Now I'm more laid back.   I'd like to care more about my appearance and try a bit more since my 40s are gonna be gone before I know it.

Yep, I think it can be tough too when you have to worry about being pretty and passing, though then again I think the two have a lot of overlap.

Quote from: Maya Zimmerman on February 09, 2012, 04:16:28 PM
  I have a huge amount of respect for Mixie and consider her one of the most positive contributors to the site. 

So do I.

Quote

When it comes to activism, it's not exactly infrequent that I see negativity confused with strength and good people, the people who bridge the gap between the fringe and the mainstream, berated and alienated over insignificant details or even worse, over simply existing outside of the fringe!  You may not be aware, but there are some very intense feminists out there who would dismiss you immediately for being trans and take any chance they could to make claims about your male privilege, whether they know anything about what your life's like or not.  Do you honestly think they're promoting feminism in an effective way or is it not more likely they're regarded as fanatics and dismissed, even by *gasp* women?

haha for sure. I actually respect the space that some feminists create between themselves and trans women. I wish it wasn't there and i criticize it up and down, but, (unpopular opinion time) I do not deny some male privileges i feel I retain through transition. WHICH IS RIDICULOUSLY CONTROVERSIAL SO LETS STOP NAO WITH THAT UNLESS YOU WANNA MSG ME. I've been brutally hammered for my opinions when it comes to that, not planning on digging myself in a hole here-- trying to climb out of this one.
Honestly? I don't like this thread :) I find it highly problematic so I said something. I am willing to talk about my own privileges all the time.
I understand people have a hard time not being defensive when accused of their own, but in this space I have no issue doing it.   but this one didn't go down how I wanted it to.

I asked you to speak your mind Torn.   But I didn't expect you to attack me.  You called me "poison"  and really I think that's a bit much.    But I have a lot of respect for you and I do think it is important to share your opinion.   I was encouraging you to consider sharing your opinion as YOUR OPINION instead of trying to speak as an advocate.   Btw I'm well aware of my white privilege,  my female privilege  and a whole bunch of other privileges that I've supposedly had in my life.   For me I don't see them so much.  I used to get really angry when I was younger and people talked to me about my white privilege.   I was homeless from the time I was 16 years old,  I was violently raped when  I was 14 because I would be out on the streets at 4 am with nowhere to go after my alcoholic mother would throw me out.   It's how I lost my hearing.  One of the reasons I got into the gay community in the first place was because I was so afraid of sex and men.    I trusted gay guys to tell me the truth.   Since I've managed to get my life together it has been a sad bit of reality that being raped at 14 would slowly take away my hearing and steep me into isolation.  It has caused me great sadness and troubles in my life.   

But I remain a happy woman because I love living life and I am thrilled with what I have to work with.  I learned a long time ago that bitterness is a waste of energy.  Resentment is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.   So now I take it as a testament to my own strength that people think I have some sort of easy life.   I think it shows I've worked hard to grow and be who I want to be rather than being the victim of circumstance.

However I do get lonely at times.   People often ask me how I lost my hearing.  I have healed bone fragments that stick out of the side of my head like little bone bumps.  I suppose I am lucky to be alive at all.  But when the question is asked again and again it does create a sense that this person who did this to me continues to hold a bit of power over me in my life 26 years later and likely will for the rest of my life.

Just find it odd that people who purport to be speaking about not judging others always tend to judge white women as having a life of privilege and ease and as if "not getting clocked"  somehow erases the reality of the troubles in my life.   That since I don't have to deal with your kind of pain,  my life is automatically easier.

In a way I think it is patronizing to other successful strong and beautiful transsexual women to lump them into a category of victim.   We're all on a path in life.  I treat everyone the same,  not as a victim but as a person just like me with their unique set of circumstances.    Peace for real Torn,  love ya!

Quote from: mixie on February 09, 2012, 04:58:04 PM
I asked you to speak your mind Torn.   But I didn't expect you to attack me.  You called me "poison"  and really I think that's a bit much.    But I have a lot of respect for you and I do think it is important to share your opinion.   I was encouraging you to consider sharing your opinion as YOUR OPINION instead of trying to speak as an advocate.   Btw I'm well aware of my white privilege,  my female privilege  and a whole bunch of other privileges that I've supposedly had in my life.   For me I don't see them so much.  I used to get really angry when I was younger and people talked to me about my white privilege.   I was homeless from the time I was 16 years old,  I was violently raped when  I was 14 because I would be out on the streets at 4 am with nowhere to go after my alcoholic mother would throw me out.   It's how I lost my hearing.  One of the reasons I got into the gay community in the first place was because I was so afraid of sex and men.    I trusted gay guys to tell me the truth.   Since I've managed to get my life together it has been a sad bit of reality that being raped at 14 would slowly take away my hearing and steep me into isolation.  It has caused me great sadness and troubles in my life.   

But I remain a happy woman because I love living life and I am thrilled with what I have to work with.  I learned a long time ago that bitterness is a waste of energy.  Resentment is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.   So now I take it as a testament to my own strength that people think I have some sort of easy life.   I think it shows I've worked hard to grow and be who I want to be rather than being the victim of circumstance.

However I do get lonely at times.   People often ask me how I lost my hearing.  I have healed bone fragments that stick out of the side of my head like little bone bumps.  I suppose I am lucky to be alive at all.  But when the question is asked again and again it does create a sense that this person who did this to me continues to hold a bit of power over me in my life 26 years later and likely will for the rest of my life.

Just find it odd that people who purport to be speaking about not judging others always tend to judge white women as having a life of privilege and ease and as if "not getting clocked"  somehow erases the reality of the troubles in my life.   That since I don't have to deal with your kind of pain,  my life is automatically easier.

In a way I think it is patronizing to other successful strong and beautiful transsexual women to lump them into a category of victim.   We're all on a path in life.  I treat everyone the same,  not as a victim but as a person just like me with their unique set of circumstances.    Peace for real Torn,  love ya!

I'm happy you have strived beyond that. You shared alot of personal stuff here, I read what you wrote carefully and I am sympathetic to what you have been through.
That doesn't excuse how i feel. "For me i don't see them so much" Mostly all people with privileges don't see their privilege.
"sharing your opinion as YOUR OPINION instead of trying to speak as an advocate."
  I am critical of cisgender privilege in certain spaces and will continue to be.
It doesn't mean i don't recognize individual struggles you may have been through.
Mixie, I was harsh and spoke my mind without much restraint and at times maybe i was alittle irrational. You send alot of good messages here but sometimes I don't agree with how you do it.
But I meet you at your perspective right now.

I love when discussions take a positive turn.

I don't get all this "privilege" crap. What is it?  Whenever you deem something as not as bad as something else, it becomes a "privilege?"  Cause that is what it seems like to me.  Its putting someone in another category because of how they were born, something not their fault and something they can't change but it makes them have to tip toe around the spaces of those who apparently feel inferior due to some perceived "privilege?"     

This is the sort of stuff that makes me want to take my white, passing "privileged" butt right back over to facebook and spend my free time annoying my mostly cis "privileged" friends or maybe lord my straight "privilege" over a few gay friends. That sounds like loads of fun, way more than I'm having here to be honest.


gah

xD
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2Fae9a503da885a2ce4e6a6790e63c1374%2F0%2F44204527%2FBarack-Obama--Snapshot-20111027-2-jpg.jpeg&hash=00e90f65e1086754be2c2715b8a5567dec95e89b) (http://www.morphthing.com/image/44204527-Barack-Obama-Snapshot-20111027-2-jpg?key=ae9a503da885a2ce4e6a6790e63c1374)

Jay + Barack Obama.
e.e

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F5%2F0%2F0%2F9287413%2FBaby-of-Denise-Richards-and-Charlie-Sheen.jpeg&hash=3c6f193d32986357f9cec7b5c83cbac0264a43dc)


You can also morph babies!  Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen  looks pretty close to the real deal.

Haha yeah, I already tested to see what our kid would look like.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.morphthing.com%2Fshowimage%2F2%2Fa56d2b2ca51013ef07f0be8c48bc071c%2F0%2F44207464%2FMe-jpg--Liv-Tyler.jpeg&hash=7a7a5aac9bcc17cc5f4f61adc9849eba3043b823) (http://www.morphthing.com/image/44207464-Me-jpg-Liv-Tyler?key=a56d2b2ca51013ef07f0be8c48bc071c)

Me and Liv Tyler, lol  :laugh:

I LOVE THIS THREAD SO USING MY MYSTICAL NECROMANCER SKILLZZZZZZZ I SHALL BRING THEE BACK TO LIFE!

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fa6.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net%2Fhphotos-ak-snc7%2F429779_194318007348103_100003097150848_311080_26751763_n.jpg&hash=ee3441218c0ef4ae864e0f181d9252d375c23120)


Sorry if I should not have done this, I just thought it was fun. o_o
It can be hilarious sometimes.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fa8.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net%2Fhphotos-ak-ash4%2F429325_194322607347643_100003097150848_311216_524945214_n.jpg&hash=bf801984856e13af4edc05128cc317c1bdabf0c7)

Quote from: Torn1990 on February 08, 2012, 02:51:31 PM
Blah blah blah blah rant rant rant blah blah

Wow, you're -really- annoying.

It's people like you, jumping on others who are just trying to be understanding and helpful that keep on setting us back. No one is going to bother to be understand towards you if you keep this up, I'm trans and I can't be bothered to be understanding to you at this point.