General Discussions => General discussions => ARGHHH! => Topic started by: Artemis on February 25, 2012, 04:54:27 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Aaarrrhhhh Parents! Money! Feelings! Life!
Post by: Artemis on February 25, 2012, 04:54:27 AM
Post by: Artemis on February 25, 2012, 04:54:27 AM
Parents sometimes really don't know how to deal with their children.
Today my mother began ranting again about the fact that I needed to find a job! That I needed to stop being so shy, stop being to slow, just go and do it, to to end it all: Be a man!
She knows that in the current state of the economy not one employer is waiting to give a job to an autistic drop-out. I have told her that I am a woman inside. She knows that I'm sure that I will never be happy as a man. But she just ignores it. Note also that I am actually working on become self-employed? App Developer. It's just so frakking hard!
I because of my GID I have some hesitation to release my first app? I would really hate to have some apps out in the world with my current name on them while it's rather likely that that I will change my name and gender someday?
On the other hand, she is actually right that I need get a better income? My current income is too low. I would not even be able to transition the way I want to on this income alone. My medical insurance will pay for most of the basic stuff but if I want to get it done just the way I want it, I would need to spend about 30-60 k€ extra. Which I don't have.
*sigh*
Today my mother began ranting again about the fact that I needed to find a job! That I needed to stop being so shy, stop being to slow, just go and do it, to to end it all: Be a man!
She knows that in the current state of the economy not one employer is waiting to give a job to an autistic drop-out. I have told her that I am a woman inside. She knows that I'm sure that I will never be happy as a man. But she just ignores it. Note also that I am actually working on become self-employed? App Developer. It's just so frakking hard!
I because of my GID I have some hesitation to release my first app? I would really hate to have some apps out in the world with my current name on them while it's rather likely that that I will change my name and gender someday?
On the other hand, she is actually right that I need get a better income? My current income is too low. I would not even be able to transition the way I want to on this income alone. My medical insurance will pay for most of the basic stuff but if I want to get it done just the way I want it, I would need to spend about 30-60 k€ extra. Which I don't have.
*sigh*
Title: Re: Aaarrrhhhh Parents! Money! Feelings! Life!
Post by: Devlyn on February 25, 2012, 06:14:33 AM
Post by: Devlyn on February 25, 2012, 06:14:33 AM
Life is full of obstacles. You outlined the hurdles in front of you, they won't go away. You have to get over them one at a time. You're going to do just fine! Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: Aaarrrhhhh Parents! Money! Feelings! Life!
Post by: BlonT on February 27, 2012, 06:49:21 AM
Post by: BlonT on February 27, 2012, 06:49:21 AM
As a parent i know we say things from frustration more then to think over them.
Just like the be a man ,no idea how old you are but the are used to say OUR boy for long its hard to break a habbit!
We are all brainwashed to used gender terms , guess thats the reason the first ask is it a boy :(
Life is hard and we all wear masks to hide our soul nobody want to get ridiculed for what she/he feels.
Long ago i calculated on how to spend my money lol never worked.
I solved it by focusing on nature ,hearing the birds sing seeing things grow , the smell of spring.
And solve problems one by one !
hugs
Just like the be a man ,no idea how old you are but the are used to say OUR boy for long its hard to break a habbit!
We are all brainwashed to used gender terms , guess thats the reason the first ask is it a boy :(
Life is hard and we all wear masks to hide our soul nobody want to get ridiculed for what she/he feels.
Long ago i calculated on how to spend my money lol never worked.
I solved it by focusing on nature ,hearing the birds sing seeing things grow , the smell of spring.
And solve problems one by one !
hugs
Title: Re: Aaarrrhhhh Parents! Money! Feelings! Life!
Post by: Artemis on February 27, 2012, 07:29:54 AM
Post by: Artemis on February 27, 2012, 07:29:54 AM
Quote from: BlonT on February 27, 2012, 06:49:21 AM:) i think you might be right that it's mostly frustration, powerlessness and habit. And usually I can take it but sometimes (usually about once a month) everything just becomes to much to handle).
As a parent i know we say things from frustration more then to think over them.
Just like the be a man ,no idea how old you are but the are used to say OUR boy for long its hard to break a habbit!
Quote from: BlonT on February 27, 2012, 06:49:21 AMWe are all brainwashed to used gender terms , guess thats the reason the first ask is it a boy :(And in this case, the better my mask was, the better I was in hidding my true feelings, the harder it is now to change? The mask has become almost like a comfort blanket, I hate it and at the same time hiding behind it makes me feel save and secure.
Life is hard and we all wear masks to hide our soul nobody want to get ridiculed for what she/he feels.
Quote from: BlonT on February 27, 2012, 06:49:21 AMGood advice. There is also no real point: I don't have the money at the moment. Better to solve this problem and then worry about spending the money when I actually have it.
Long ago i calculated on how to spend my money lol never worked.
I solved it by focusing on nature ,hearing the birds sing seeing things grow , the smell of spring.
And solve problems one by one !
hugs