Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Okay so lately, like today, im tired, worn-out, my eyes hurt... So I am not at all close to living as a female yet, im still living as a guy in my suburban part of Pennsylvania here... and i just came back from grocery shopping nad im hungry and irritable and this house is a f'n pigsty.  Lately ive been saying things like "dude," "awesome," ive been cursing a lot, and im trampling around not giving a ->-bleeped-<-e about anything.  Im lazy, im a slacker, and my personal hygiene leaves a lot to be desired....

Yet Im female on the inside and im actually very feminine.  Its just that i guess because i cant express that im becoming a guy... personality-wise and everything.  the only thing is that i have a very feminine high pitched voice and i walk like a woman.  u can all see my pre-ffs pics... im the one that posted them not too long ago on here.

Anyway, i realized that maybe if I was a girl, I'd be a tomboy... I'd be the kind of girl who'd be the happiest in a camisole and sweatpants with her hair in a ponytail, no makeup, and a no-fuss attitude.  i mean seriously id love that... to just be who i am, without trying to be something, and just lie back on a warm day and chill... i mean like f-k the world, just be me for once...  So maybe i would be a tomboy.

I never liked sports - maybe figure skating every four years- but now im thinking if I had been a girl I probably would have loved volleyball.  It was the one sport in high school gym class i actually liked playing.... and so i think i would have been a volleyball player....

So can it be?  Could this Barbie princess sorority girl actually really be a tomboy?  Or is it just that this is another side of me that i need to accept?  I mean I cant be pretty and feminine every day.... some days i just need to strip myself down and be okay with that...  Im not a crossdresser - i cant do the blouse, the skirt, and the pantyhose thing every day.  i just need to understand i can be as many people as i want to be -

I'm a person first and i have many different aspects to my identity. not just one.  im not just the princess girly girl.  its okay to have a side thats not.

Does any of this make sense?

Yep, it makes total sense to me.  I consider myself a tomboy.  I don't want to get dolled up every day - I do it for special occasions.  As a child, I played with action figures and Legos.  I watch action movies.  I don't like rom coms.  I wear jeans and a tshirt in most cases.  I don't like dresses.  I know a lot of this tomboy-ishness comes from my mom, because she's a tomboy.  The smattering of girliness in my presentation is from my step-mom, who loves makeup and jewelry.

Once I realized that I didn't have to try to hit some unrealistic feminine ideal to be a woman, I was much more secure with transition.  Being ultrafemme felt like lying to the world again.  As for "passing" while still maintaining that androgyny in my personality and presentation, I came to realize that the things that I wanted to do and the way that I wanted to present wouldn't make a genetic girl look like any less of a female - they wouldn't question her sex.  Mine shouldn't be questioned either.  Just because we're trans, doesn't mean we should be made to feel as though we're under a microscope.  Live your life how you want to - it's your life and it's the only one you got.  It should be one that you enjoy. :)

Btw, I know a transgirl who is a butch.  She even binds on occasion.  I have mucho admiration for her. :)

I have to agree with Cadence. What it boils down to.. at least for me, i seeking to be "yourself" through transition.  And whom ever that may be, tomboy or not, that's who YOU are.  I have to say I've been thinking about nearly the same thing, this aspect of our lives seems sometimes no different than the "front" that we have to put on as our guy selves.  Honestly people are people and they come in so many varieties, I personally have always loved the outdoors and travel, along with being a bit of a "gear head," so does that mean after I start my HRT I have to give up the things I loved before?  I don't think so!  I've thought about it over the years on what kind of "girl" I'd be and I have to say I've come back to tomboy myself.  As long as you can get to a place where you can be you, who cares if you're in sweats and a cami, Pennsylvania can get COLD throw on a hoodie if you need!
;)

I ask my self that a fair bit as well.  I think it's just one of those quirks.  You tend to be a little bit rougher if you where raised like you where the other gender.

The point of transition, for me at least, is to be who I am.. If that's a somewhat butch or tomboyish woman, so what? I realised early on, and from my interactions with females, that they come in all shapes and sizes - and very few, surprisingly, actually conform to the 'girly girl' stereotype..

I am who I am, and I'm happy to be that way..

In a word, yes. 
Most natural thing in the world. GG's can be, so why not a trans woman, after all we are just another sort of woman.  Black, white, tall, short, are all types of woman, and if they can be a tomboy, so can you. 
That's about it really.  Have fun. :)

Karen.

AWOMYN  ;)

Don't need to be feminine to be female. Same way you don't need to be masculine to be male.

You are who you are. How you act isn't so important as how you feel. And the last thing you need is to strip away one mask only to reveal another one beneath.

Go with your instincts. They're more reliable than what I, or anyone else, can tell you about yourself.

Quote from: Sephirah on March 03, 2012, 06:46:12 AM
Don't need to be feminine to be female. Same way you don't need to be masculine to be male.

You are who you are. How you act isn't so important as how you feel. And the last thing you need is to strip away one mask only to reveal another one beneath.

Go with your instincts. They're more reliable than what I, or anyone else, can tell you about yourself.

+1, I agree with her, just be yourself don't be fake or put on another mask! Why go through all the trouble of coming out, just to hide again. Tom boy is fine and can be quite sexy! =)  The person you are inside is more beautiful than any person you can ever pretend to be, so why bother. You can be barbie princess sorority girl tomboy.

Quote from: JennyCop on March 03, 2012, 08:31:58 AM
+1, I agree with her, just be yourself don't be fake or put on another mask! Why go through all the trouble of coming out, just to hide again. Tom boy is fine and can be quite sexy! =)  The person you are inside is more beautiful than any person you can ever pretend to be, so why bother. You can be barbie princess sorority girl tomboy.

I like that lol :D