Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Liquor than beer, never fear.
Beer than liquor, never sicker.

;D

Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker! Hugs, Devlyn

For guys: Don't pee into the wind.

For girls: Look under the seat before sitting.

For guys stand closer it isn't as big as you think.

For girls, check for redbacks (Aussie humour)

"Wein auf Bier, das rate ich dir,
Bier auf Wein... das laß sein."

"Wine on beer, I'll advise you here,
Beer on wine ... good for swine"

(not quite litteral but you'll get the point, eh?)


Vordermann! Seitenrichtung! Auf Rohrlänge aufschließen!  Eins, zwei, links, rechts... :)

Front man! Lateral direction! Catch up to barrel-length! One, two, left, right ... :)

(moving up closer than to barrel-length... would have some serious consequences, oh yes!)

Axelle

Can't means won't

it may or may not get better real fast but it sure gets interesting which is worth being around

Listen to that little voice in your head when it says DON'T DO THAT

The country is way more peaceful than the city

Cancer is usually from doing something over and over.. so try diversity in your life / diet

Sex definately is not all its cracked up to be .. but you won't know that until you nip it in the bud

getting old is a lot more fun than you might think

Don't do something dumb which will ruin the rest of your life

Your sense of self is worth way more than any money or career

Good people like good people nasty people only are liked by themselves

If you love hard work you will always find work and good people who appreciate hard workers

Grow your own food you will be surprised how much you save and how great it taste

Eat food because it makes you feel good inside not just because it taste good

Listen to the elderly they have been around to know better

God is love , Love is God , make a resting place in your heart for Love/God

Guys:

We aim to please.
You aim too, please.

Girls:

Cover if you hover.

"Wenn über eine dumme Sache endlich Gras gewachsen ist, kommt so ein Kamel, das alles wieder runterfrißt"

Once grass has finally grown over a bad affair, some stupid camel comes along and chews it all off again.

"We don't swim in your toilet, please don't pee in our pool."

<over male urinal>

- Note: More then 3 times shaking off, is masturbation! -

Quote from: Felix on April 22, 2012, 10:58:18 PM
"We don't swim in your toilet, please don't pee in our pool."

I stayed at a hotel years ago in Texas, they had a sign (I hope I remember this correctly) :

QuoteWelcome to our Ool.

We have a nice, clean Ool.

You'll notice there is no "P" in our Ool.

Please help us keep it this way.

Quote from: Axélle-Michélle on April 22, 2012, 11:17:46 PM
<over male urinal>

- Note: More then 3 times shaking off, is masturbation! -

No matter how you squiggle, squirm, or dance,
the last few drops run down your pants

Sex is much like a mystery novel, once the mystery is solved the intrigue tends to vanish

Quote from: V M on April 23, 2012, 01:24:46 AM
Sex is much like a mystery novel, once the mystery is solved the intrigue tends to vanish

Wait, sex is about intrigue? I must be doing it all wrong.

*slings e-peen over shoulder and stomps off*

When all is said and done, there is more said than done.

Quote from: Jamie D on April 23, 2012, 12:59:21 AM
No matter how you squiggle, squirm, or dance,
the last few drops run down your pants

That was advise for some older dudes, not having come to grips with their enlarged prostate...

So, ... long live post-op girl plumbing, no squiggle, squirm, or dance :)

(Elitist? Naaah, go away already, just a fact)

Axélle

Be like Pa, not like Sis, lift the seat before you piss! Hugs, Devlyn

"Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill"

The most twee sign I ever saw in a bathroom was:

If you sprinkle
When you tinkle
Be a sweetie
And wipe the seatie.

Anyway:

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity"

I see this thread has gone into the dirt so heres one

here i sit broken hearted paid to ->-bleeped-<- but only farted

those pay toilets suck

At least try to have a little class on occasion

Quote from: Amazon D on April 24, 2012, 06:10:10 AM
I see this thread has gone into the dirt so heres one

here i sit broken hearted paid to ->-bleeped-<- but only farted

those pay toilets suck

I have always heard it as "Here I sit, all broken hearted.  Paid my quarter and only farted."

edit:

Beans, beans
the musical fruit
the more you eat
the more you toot

the more you toot
the better you feel
so eat some beans
at every meal

There are only five things you can do on the toilet.

Quote from: Cindy James on April 24, 2012, 11:07:41 AM
There are only five things you can do on the toilet.

Wait, what?

Sometimes I trim my toenails on the toilet. That's something.

Can do, or should do? Hugs, Devlyn

Quote from: Cindy James on April 24, 2012, 11:07:41 AM
There are only five things you can do on the toilet.

(Someone has to ask)

Five?  What are they?

I know one of them for a fact : You can drop your uniform shirt into the toilet whilst changing on the first day of your new job at the sandwich shop.

Cindy won't be around until the sun rises in Australia. Lets continue with the list Mia started. Two: Complex mathematical equations. Hugs, Devlyn

Bleh in my hometown it is already 9:30! Where is, she out in W.A. somewheres?

C'mon Lisa,  the bender couldn't have been that rough! Bright eyed and bushy tailed luv!  :P

and Devlyn...complex mathematics?! You're insane!

5 things

->-bleeped-<-
piss
fart
diarhea
play with yourself ? 

I'm back
The sun is going down on ANZAC day

Quote from: Amazon D on April 24, 2012, 06:53:40 PM
5 things

->-bleeped-<-
piss
fart
diarhea
play with yourself ?

Some people take/make telephone calls from the toilet.
Telephones in the bathroom are just wrong, wrong, wrong.

Quote from: Cindy James on April 25, 2012, 02:22:08 AM
I'm back
The sun is going down on ANZAC day

Salute!

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fblog.communicaid.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F11%2FMilitary-Salute_Arthur-Carlo-Franco_i2.jpg&hash=a57bbb51ed552b60465a78e83669abf49a074010)

Thanks Jamie.

I dislike war and violence but I praise the valour and sacrifice that all the incredible people who have protected us have given.

It was a t dawn of this day that the young men of Australia and New Zealand were landed on the killing field of Gallipoli. Unknown to them it was strongly protected by the Turkish army, brave people also.

It was a slaughter.

The Turkish people keep Anzac Cove at Gallipoli as a memorial to those who died during that terrible time. And Australians and New Zealanders remember  all of our fallen and injured war personnel on this day.

No matter if the politics were right or wrong, people lost their lives to defend their countries and their loved ones.

I honour them.

Cindy James

Yay to the diggers!

That was a very lovely tribute, and though I'm not one for war or fighting, I do like to pause and remember the sacrifices made by our soldiers.

Happy ANZAC Day Cindy, hope it was nice weather for ya! :)

<Giving a crisp salute> I apologize for not knowing about this day of tribute to your brave soldiers. Hugs, Devlyn

Some sage advice my father made sure to pass along;

"Don't pee on an electric fence."

It's good to pwn Page 3.

;)

Quote from: Tamaki on April 25, 2012, 07:24:55 PM
Some sage advice my father made sure to pass along;

"Don't pee on an electric fence."

No Joke!

Wash. man electrocuted by urinating on power line (http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/nationworld/2011224615_apusurineelectrocution.html)

Quote from: Jamie DWash. man electrocuted by urinating on power line

So I guess u could say it was was an electrifying experience

(OMG stop me before I strike again. ::) ::))

Quote from: Tamaki on April 25, 2012, 07:24:55 PM
Some sage advice my father made sure to pass along;

"Don't pee on an electric fence."

Don't Whiz On The Electric Fence!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wW6rENTfaU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_wW6rENTfaU)

My friend had a horse that when kids sat on it would wander over to the electric fence and touch it. Evil beast >:-)

Quote from: MiaOhMya! on April 26, 2012, 12:42:28 AM
So I guess u could say it was was an electrifying experience

(OMG stop me before I strike again. ::) ::))

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fweathertracking.webs.com%2Fphotos%2F-Tornadoes-and-lightning%2Flightning3.jpg&hash=b3cb9a8ea3f47c830c4edb24de09786ef380d9f9)

Quote from: MiaOhMya! on April 26, 2012, 12:42:28 AM
So I guess u could say it was was an electrifying experience

(OMG stop me before I strike again. ::) ::))

LOL...I got a jolt out of that one!

Measure twice.
Cut once.

An old carpenter's adage that applies to much more than carpentry.

Buy quality, cry once. Buy cheap, cry twice.