Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hey everyone,

I am Danielle and I am 24 year old from Sydney Australia. I have just started my HRT for about 6 weeks into it now and am extremely excited over my changes that have happened. I've always been terrified that I could never change (transition) considering my body, musculature and bone density, which is large and muscular- yet curvy in the right spots? Anyways, transitioning so late for me was because I always felt that medication/HRT would not be possible for a person of my body type and doing so would end up me being in this mutant combination of a man with long hair. So basically I had no faith in HRT. I've always disassociated myself from my birth gender as I always felt essentially like a girl stuck in this boy costume that I could not take off. I've read, seen and heard of people where they are disassociated to their birth bodies too and moreover with their penises. When I was growing up I always felt my penis was just an attachment and under it was a vagina that was hidden and somehow my penis would fall off at some stage in my life (I would have been around 8 or so when I believed this). But now I don't find it a horrible entity that isn't a part of me, I believe it is part of my body but doesn't mean I play with it-let alone let anyone else play with it. :D

Anyways, I'm finding it a little bit unbearable sometimes due to the hormonal rollercoaster...with my mood swings and what not. Lately, I've met a man who is kind of seeing me, kind of not. He is very understanding and totally understand the whole transitioning progress with transexual girls -mtf. He is a great friend and lover but lately due to the mood swings I have started lashing out at him and I realised I needed some friends that are or have gone on the same road as me. I just want to talk to other tgirls and make new friends. I'm finding it hard to find tgirls where I'm at because all the asian girl tgirls in Sydney seem so bitchy, jealous and incredibly territorial with their friends and boys, so I try and avoid them as much as possible and the white tgirls around me don't seem to exist? Or they work in brothels, which is only a few doors down from where I live and I've never seen out in daylight!

So yeh, so far I'm not living full time although after six weeks my boobs have enlarged to a solid handful (I had gynecomastia ever since I was a child despite me having such a large solid build!), and my hair is growing too -long enough to put into a little pony tail. So I do get a lot of people giving me curious and sometimes friendly looks because I look almost freakishly weird hahah. Basically I look like a asian/pacific islander samurai ninja dyke - who knows I might start a fashion trend? Hahaa

So thats basically me in a short nut shell. I hope I find new friends and support here.

So Hi, I'm Danielle... I'm a male to female transexual in transition. :)

Welcome, Danielle.

Ah, yes, the 6 week emotional roller coaster of HRT. It was at about that time my ex-wife and I saw Deathly Hallows part 2 and I spent 1/3 to 1/2 of the movie sobbing. That's about when my breast buds started hurting, too.

I should have realized that it would feel like a second puberty.

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Enjoy your stay!

Hi Danielle,

Welcome to Susan's. I'm from Adelaide, so I can't give you any Sydney specific advice, but it's nice to see another Aussie girl around the place..

Hugs,
Kelly

Hi welcome to Susans Danielle! :)

Hi Danielle and welcome from Tassie. 
The emotions should settle down after a while, so it's just another thing we have to be patient about. Unfortunately. 
I had a "Friends with Benefits" situation with an Intersex woman for a while. It really  helped me to come to terms with being a woman with a penis, and appreciate that a woman is a woman, regardless.  It's a case of using what you have got and enjoying it, and we did believe me. I quite like penises now, as long as they are on women!  >:-)  It's not ideal, and I will rectify my situation, but in the meantime I'm happy enough.
Whatever happens now, I have decided that I have to accept responsibility for my own actions, not blame others and not make excuses.  Others are entitled to their own opinions, but I am the one who has to live in my own skin, so I will do it on my terms.  If I want to describe myself now I guess I would come up with  Genderqueer, Femme,  early 60's, Folk-Rocker, Transdyke.  Your self description sounds cool!

Karen.

Hi Danielle,

Another Aussie girl from Adelaide.  I know a couple of girls in Sydney, sounds a positive place to transition. Then again Australia seems to be a good place for everything .

Cindy

Hi Danielle, :icon_wave:

Welcome to our little family. Over 6931 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

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thanks for the kind welcome people. :)
I'm still new to the whole transgender/transexual world... so I hope I learn a lot. Cisgendered friends can only go so far as to what they know or heard from "another friend of a friend who's trans" than first hand experience from TS/TG people :D
Thanks again...  :)


also, speaking of family reunion Ms. O'Brien, has the forum ever staged a meet up? I used to be very active in this other forum (ourGTN) which had yearly meet ups...in many different countries. Naturally, it wasn't a big party as many simply couldn't afford it but it definitely made everyone feel quite close as a global family.

Hi Danielle, it's nice to meet you! You'll meet lots of nice people here, more than a few are Aussies! I'm from Boston. See you around the site, hugs, Devlyn

Hey Danielle,

Welcome to Susan's! We're really glad you're here.  :D