Community Conversation => Significant Others talk => Topic started by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 16, 2012, 09:49:04 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 16, 2012, 09:49:04 PM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 16, 2012, 09:49:04 PM
It has been a little over a year that Jill has been on hormones and she has been laid off from her job on May 30, 2012. Tne day we moved into our apartment!! She has cases open with Nevada Equal Rights Commission so far we have received good progress with them. She is super anxious and has her medical weed license BUT it is really hard for her to shut her brain off and she binge eats alot... I feel she is not well balanced right now AT all!! I know this is a long process and she must go through her anxiety herself. I do not feel she has accepted herself as a trans woman yet and has alot of things to go through. I need to step up to the plate and try and help her more then I am.. I freeze at time and do not know what to do.. Our savings account is depleting and I am getting nervous. She is not emotionally ready to return to woek considering what took place earlier this year.
She tries to be happy but I feel she is rather neurotic right now. Does anyone have any tips or advice? Thank you!! :)
She tries to be happy but I feel she is rather neurotic right now. Does anyone have any tips or advice? Thank you!! :)
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: Jamie D on June 17, 2012, 04:25:23 AM
Post by: Jamie D on June 17, 2012, 04:25:23 AM
Quote from: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 16, 2012, 09:49:04 PM
It has been a little over a year that Jill has been on hormones and she has been laid off from her job on May 30, 2012. Tne day we moved into our apartment!! She has cases open with Nevada Equal Rights Commission so far we have received good progress with them. She is super anxious and has her medical weed license BUT it is really hard for her to shut her brain off and she binge eats alot... I feel she is not well balanced right now AT all!! I know this is a long process and she must go through her anxiety herself. I do not feel she has accepted herself as a trans woman yet and has alot of things to go through. I need to step up to the plate and try and help her more then I am.. I freeze at time and do not know what to do.. Our savings account is depleting and I am getting nervous. She is not emotionally ready to return to woek considering what took place earlier this year.
She tries to be happy but I feel she is rather neurotic right now. Does anyone have any tips or advice? Thank you!! :)
While she is pursuing the discrimination complaint, she should be eligible for unemployment, and possibly disability (if she has been emotionally damaged by the treatment - have her talk with her therapist).
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 06:25:45 AM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 06:25:45 AM
We do get unemployment!!! Thank god LOL LOL!! If it was not for that I would be even more stressed financially!! LOL LOL Can she get disability and unemployment at the same time?? That would be kinda nice if she could. I have to keep dipping into our savings account every week!! EKKKK!!! I did our budget but it is really tight and the fact that it is summer is more expensive!! I know I am in the same boat with everyone else, but still made me get up early on a weekend!!! NOW I am anxious LOL Oh what are you going to do.. this life is so funny at times!!!!
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: Jeneva on June 17, 2012, 10:19:08 AM
Post by: Jeneva on June 17, 2012, 10:19:08 AM
Anxiety can qualify for disability if it is severe enough. She has to be off work for 6 months before it could kick in and they must feel it will last at least a year. My mother-in-law suggested disability when I mentioned having trouble getting FMLA/ADA accommodations without them just saying I wasn't able to work at all. Also depending on her age it may be hard. Until mid 40s it is fairly hard to qualify and can take some time.
Thank you for standing by her as she deals with her anxiety. I'm just coming out of a very bad spiral myself because of work garbage and I know I could not have done it without Shannon. I was days away from calling the DOL and EEOC to investigate and they finally decided they couldn't find a legal way to deny me FMLA (they want 60-80 hours a week). I still haven't heard if my ADA accommodations will be granted, but having the FMLA means I don't have to work until I'm wound too tightly. My lawyer is ready to go and confident of a win if we have to file suit, but that could take so long to get resolution.
Having never smoked weed before I can't compare it to benzos, but does she have a prescription for them? They can be very evil, but in small doses they DO work to quell panic.
Thank you for standing by her as she deals with her anxiety. I'm just coming out of a very bad spiral myself because of work garbage and I know I could not have done it without Shannon. I was days away from calling the DOL and EEOC to investigate and they finally decided they couldn't find a legal way to deny me FMLA (they want 60-80 hours a week). I still haven't heard if my ADA accommodations will be granted, but having the FMLA means I don't have to work until I'm wound too tightly. My lawyer is ready to go and confident of a win if we have to file suit, but that could take so long to get resolution.
Having never smoked weed before I can't compare it to benzos, but does she have a prescription for them? They can be very evil, but in small doses they DO work to quell panic.
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 01:10:10 PM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 01:10:10 PM
Thank you so much for the advice!! All I needed to know was that this was normal for a transgender person to go through these "spirals"!! I tend to freak out sometimes but try to hide it!! LOL LOL I need to be the strong one and she is learning to help me in my ways I need as well!! I am proud of our accomplishments as a couple this far!! I will look into "benzos"for her!!! Anything to help! At least that is legal LOL LOL.. She is feeling better today... So I am too!! She is my soulmate and she feels what I feel and vise versa!! BUT I do not want to fall to deep with her because no one will be their to pull us out!!
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: Jeneva on June 17, 2012, 01:21:45 PM
Post by: Jeneva on June 17, 2012, 01:21:45 PM
Quote from: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 01:10:10 PMhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benzodiazepine (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Benzodiazepine)
I will look into "benzos"for her!!! Anything to help! At least that is legal LOL LOL..
Valium is one of the more well known benzos. They are usually prescribed for generalized anxiety disorder.
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: Jamie D on June 17, 2012, 01:23:50 PM
Post by: Jamie D on June 17, 2012, 01:23:50 PM
Quote from: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 06:25:45 AM
We do get unemployment!!! Thank god LOL LOL!! If it was not for that I would be even more stressed financially!! LOL LOL Can she get disability and unemployment at the same time?? That would be kinda nice if she could. I have to keep dipping into our savings account every week!! EKKKK!!! I did our budget but it is really tight and the fact that it is summer is more expensive!! I know I am in the same boat with everyone else, but still made me get up early on a weekend!!! NOW I am anxious LOL Oh what are you going to do.. this life is so funny at times!!!!
Not both at the same time, at least in my state. Disability usually pays more, though.
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: Jeneva on June 17, 2012, 01:40:22 PM
Post by: Jeneva on June 17, 2012, 01:40:22 PM
You can look up disability amounts via the SSA website. https://secure.ssa.gov/RIL/SiView.do
But as I said it can be difficult to get coverage and may take a few appeals. If you do decide to go that route talk to a Social Security Disability Lawyer since they will help you with just a cut of the back pay once it is granted instead of huge sums of cash up front.
But as I said it can be difficult to get coverage and may take a few appeals. If you do decide to go that route talk to a Social Security Disability Lawyer since they will help you with just a cut of the back pay once it is granted instead of huge sums of cash up front.
Title: Re: Update on My Jillybean
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 08:55:24 PM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on June 17, 2012, 08:55:24 PM
She did take some valium yesterday and felt rested and refreshed until her sister ruined that for her!!! There was an incident that happened to Jill at the Social Security office where she was illegally detained and harassed and asked about her genitals back in February!! So she went to the police department and they would not file a report and what do you know he disrespected her AGAIN!! Well long story short, Jill's dad is a retired cop and Jill's sister somehow talked with this cop about Jill's incident and had her family side with them!! We just found this out during our lunch with her family today!!!! Jill stormed out of the house and said WOW you are siding with that ->-bleeped-<-!!!!!! I can't believe that!!! Sure Jill is really really emotional right now and that is understandable to me. When you hold in your truth for 34 years it is bound to come out like a water fall!!!!!!! WHY cant her sister be nice and side with Jill... Oh wait I know why?? Her family never had Jill's back 100%...Background information: (Jill was on drugs for 10 years) but has been clean for 11 years!! SO that has affected how her family responds to her!! It is really complicated!!!!!!!! :/