Community Conversation => Significant Others talk => Topic started by: qUiRkY qUeEn on July 08, 2012, 06:30:30 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Do Not Want to Feel This Way :*(
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on July 08, 2012, 06:30:30 PM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on July 08, 2012, 06:30:30 PM
I feel like I want to leave Jill.... I am torn.... I do not feel like I am in a relationship any more... She is trying to figure out herself and in the mean time I am lonely lost and depressed as all get out!!!!! She has SO many things to work through... I wonder if these feelings are all just a sign of transition?? I do not know... She is super depressed tho and is really confused about her and I... I am freaking out and hope this feeling from both of us will go away!!!! I HATE HATE HATE feeling like this.... She tells me she pictures me leaving her and having a normal life with kids and a husband and she living with the poor people...I think this is just a symptom we both are going through at the same time.... maybe we have been drifting apart.. IDK BUT I do not want to make any rash choices either... We have been together for 10 years and married for 7 years.... WE HAVE ALOT OF HISTORY TOGETHER!!!!!!!! I wonder if she feels she will never feel like a girl with me.... I AM SCARED>
Title: Re: Do Not Want to Feel This Way :*(
Post by: Ms. OBrien CVT on July 08, 2012, 07:22:28 PM
Post by: Ms. OBrien CVT on July 08, 2012, 07:22:28 PM
If you love her, never give up. Fight for her. Show her you love her and support her.
Title: Re: Do Not Want to Feel This Way :*(
Post by: Jeneva on July 08, 2012, 08:43:05 PM
Post by: Jeneva on July 08, 2012, 08:43:05 PM
First of all it is perfectly alright for you to feel however you feel. If she has isolated herself then you really aren't in a relationship right now and it isn't your fault, but you can do something about it if you want.
I had Shannon read your post and she said for me to reply because ironically in our situation it is Shannon that withdrew (I have sworn it off after living it for years).. You won't be in a relationship unless you fight for it. She is shutting everyone out and drawing in. If you let her then she will be all alone, but if you can teach her to trust both herself and you then your relationship will be so much stronger.
You've done enough to prove you want to be there, but she can't trust you because she doesn't trust herself right now. In this case when we say support her, it means to help her see that it is ok to trust her innermost self. We've been taught so long to hide it, that it can be difficult to let down those walls. Also she is afraid that she will lose you so she isolates herself so it will hurt less, but in doing so, she WILL lose you.
We've been playing this a lot lately because both the music and lyrics are awesome. The video is also cool, especially how they use the building windows lit as a visual equalizer. The singer is also very HOT.
Gareth Emery feat. Christina Novelli - Concrete Angel [Official Music Video] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dFz10R529g#)
lyrics:
Let me breath you in, and breath the words in your mouth,
Inside your shivering, the silence shouts so loud.
I just want to, I just want to stay around,
And while my heart beats I promise I won't let you down.
If I'm somewhere else it doesn't mean that I don't see,
That you don't trust yourself, that's why you don't trust me,
It makes me crazy, when you're crazy, you don't speak,
You think you know me, but what you know is just skin deep
If you keep building these walls
Brick by brick towers so tall
Soon I won't see you at all
Till the concrete angel falls
I knew who you were from the start
But now I don't know who you are
Soon there will be nothing at all
Till the concrete angel falls
I had Shannon read your post and she said for me to reply because ironically in our situation it is Shannon that withdrew (I have sworn it off after living it for years).. You won't be in a relationship unless you fight for it. She is shutting everyone out and drawing in. If you let her then she will be all alone, but if you can teach her to trust both herself and you then your relationship will be so much stronger.
You've done enough to prove you want to be there, but she can't trust you because she doesn't trust herself right now. In this case when we say support her, it means to help her see that it is ok to trust her innermost self. We've been taught so long to hide it, that it can be difficult to let down those walls. Also she is afraid that she will lose you so she isolates herself so it will hurt less, but in doing so, she WILL lose you.
We've been playing this a lot lately because both the music and lyrics are awesome. The video is also cool, especially how they use the building windows lit as a visual equalizer. The singer is also very HOT.
Gareth Emery feat. Christina Novelli - Concrete Angel [Official Music Video] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dFz10R529g#)
lyrics:
Let me breath you in, and breath the words in your mouth,
Inside your shivering, the silence shouts so loud.
I just want to, I just want to stay around,
And while my heart beats I promise I won't let you down.
If I'm somewhere else it doesn't mean that I don't see,
That you don't trust yourself, that's why you don't trust me,
It makes me crazy, when you're crazy, you don't speak,
You think you know me, but what you know is just skin deep
If you keep building these walls
Brick by brick towers so tall
Soon I won't see you at all
Till the concrete angel falls
I knew who you were from the start
But now I don't know who you are
Soon there will be nothing at all
Till the concrete angel falls
Title: Re: Do Not Want to Feel This Way :*(
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on July 09, 2012, 10:39:33 PM
Post by: qUiRkY qUeEn on July 09, 2012, 10:39:33 PM
Thank you Jeneva & Ms. Obrien!!! I LOVE HER ALOT and I will stand by her side.... I went into our office before the weekend was over and told her that I will fight for her and she will not have to worry about me turn my head away from her!!!!! She is my soul mate I love what is on the inside!!!! We have been together for 10 years and my world was never the same again.. i mean that in a wonderful way... Our theripist helped me sort threw how I must support myself in Jilly's transition (since she is super focused on it) but i am learning A lot from her transition!!!! I am super sensitive to my needs right now and am her to support Jill no matter what BUT i was always trying to get in Jill's head to figure her out.....THAT was driving me crazy.. I am feeling better.. You are right that Jilly needs to trust herself...just like everyone else...just because a hot guy wants you does not mean you have to give it up to him... just take in a little of his attention for your self and leave it at that... she will find her way...