Susan's Place Transgender Resources

"Yes, you did." I knew in the back of my mind that I wanted to come out about my trans-feelings eventually, but not to my therapist or even today! Of course I began to sob in the first few minutes when she asked "How could you be honest about who you really are to others and to yourself?", that's when I spilled it. Luckily, her response was positive and she was very understanding, even though she did not see that one coming. She said that a lot of my issues are now put in a different lighting for her and that she knew that there was something I wasn't telling. Surprise.

I'm glad that I made a start now, but I'm also scared for the consequences. It feels like I've opened Pandora's box. It's still very unreal, as if I haven't told her. I even made some stupid jokes during the session, my favorite coping mechanism. I've been dealing with these feelings for so long, that it feels like such a relief now that I've said it out loud. Also, what have I done!

For my next appointment we've set two goals, besides the other goals (she's making me work!), which are to get on two waiting lists for an intake with a 'Genderteam'. (In the Netherlands there are two main hospitals that have departments with staff specialized in gender related issues.) Until then, I'll try to let it sink in and do as much of the activities I'd normally do, because right now normal feels good.

I remember when I came out to my therapist. He was the first person I told too! And he was so surprised!!!! In fact, the look on his face was rather priceless, I stil remember it. I came out to him though hoping he would tell me it was just in my head, that I should just put it away and not think about it. Instead he encouraged me to experiment and find myself. I took his advice, though hesitant . . . and I think I'm the happiest person alive for it!

I came out to my therapist after my third appointment. I don't know why it took me so long, it was like I somehow couldn't make myself tell her. I feel so much better now that she knows. She wants me to take it slow, which I can understand. I don't know what I would do without her.

Well to be honest I went to my first appointment with my therapist with the main intention of telling her about this.

In the first 5 minutes I explained all the things I worried about and the basic theories I had for what I needed help with. It took another 4 meetings before we actually started talking about my gender issues, and even after that she still feels it would be more useful to discuss other things since I seem to already know what my basic plans are for starting the transition. I'm also currently seeing a psychologist somewhere else for an official assessment that determines if I qualify for HRT.


The first step is usually quite hard for most people, and there's a long way to go before the 'no turning back' stage.. so just go with it for now, see how you go and worry about making decisions later (:

Quote from: Hippolover25 on August 31, 2012, 08:39:11 PM
I came out to him though hoping he would tell me it was just in my head, that I should just put it away and not think about it. Instead he encouraged me to experiment and find myself.

That's really good advice he gave you, my therapist basically told me the same. She also suggested that I consider exploring the dating scene, to see what gender role I'm most comfortable with, since I have ZERO experience on that front. Seems fair.

Quote from: msm16 on August 31, 2012, 11:44:40 PM
I came out to my therapist after my third appointment. I don't know why it took me so long, it was like I somehow couldn't make myself tell her. I feel so much better now that she knows. She wants me to take it slow, which I can understand. I don't know what I would do without her.

Me too. It feels so nice that someone I can trust knows about that part of me.

Quote from: MayoiNeko on September 01, 2012, 03:03:12 AM
The first step is usually quite hard for most people, and there's a long way to go before the 'no turning back' stage.. so just go with it for now, see how you go and worry about making decisions later (:

You're right, thanks. The waiting lists for an intake are insane! So it won't be until at least 5-6 months before it's my turn with the G-team.

My best coming out experience was not with my therapist, but rather with my physician.  She was very sweet, yet direct in asking me if I felt like a man or woman inside.  After I told her I know that I'm a woman on the inside, she was very matter of fact and said, "well, then your a woman" and began to treat me accordingly.  On my last visit she even asked me if I had picked out a name.  Without realizing it, turned out to be same first name as she has!

Its a great feeling to be honest with your doctors and therapists - congrats to you!

Quote from: Rosa on September 01, 2012, 06:57:36 PM
Its a great feeling to be honest with your doctors and therapists - congrats to you!

Thank you! I can't wait for the anxiety and embarrassment to subside though. 

Quote from: Puck on September 01, 2012, 05:18:59 PM
The waiting lists for an intake are insane! So it won't be until at least 5-6 months before it's my turn with the G-team.

Make that 12-14 months.. for an intake. I just spoke with someone from the Medical Center over the phone and I got told that the waiting times are a longer than I initially had in mind. They're trying their hardest to get that number down. There are no alternative ways in the Netherlands to get a prescription for HRT, so there's not much left other than to accept the hospital's policy. But at least I'm on the waiting list, that's enough to digest for now.

Oh, and my GP will get contacted for my personal record. Great! It would've come to this sooner or later, but I'd rather later.