Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I've noticed a lot of discussions of stereotypes getting out of hand.

Thus, ss the title implies, this is a thread to talk about those dreaded gender-based stereotypes.

You can bring up anything you want or stop to discuss something someone else brought up. Talk about how you disagree with a stereotype, see it as a decent general rule, or see it as just plain rubbish. Dealer's choice.  :)

Anywho, I'll start in the spirit of ice-breaking//fairness.

I don't like how people sometimes think that girls are all frail and afraid. I can use throwing knives, bows and arrows, my giant aluminum Captain America shield, and swords and plan on keeping them, even after transition. After I'm done playing with my "toys," I'll play with my giant teddy bear, Mr. Snuggles, and have a tea party with him and Cuddlekins, my stuffed rhino.

How girls are supposed to be all into musicals and poppy happy music, and stuff. I like some of them but dangit don't tell me listening to six feet under is not lady like >_<

Hm, I thought that was the stereotype for gay guys.  :laugh:

I agree, though, I like West Side Story and whatnot, but I also like my share of rock.

"Manly" bands I'd recommend:
-Bon Jovi
-Led Zeppelin
-Aerosmith
-Orange
-The Ramones
-Nickelback
-Everclear

"Girly" artists I'd recommend:
-Christina Aguilera
-Cascada
-Shakira
-Irene Cara
-Victoria Justice (Give her a chance)

I dropped my interest in birds/wildlife as a guy in case anyone thought it was girly!I bird watch and look at wildlife now.I still check out classic cars mainly Detroit iron or the British cars that looked like them and classic bikes especially Triumphs and Harley Sportsters.I listen to a lot more female fronted groups than I used to, Nightwish,Within Temptation,Halestorm,Bif Naked and Doro are favourites.

It makes me laugh that I'm wearing pretty much the same outfit I was wearing in my teens - converse, bootcut jeans, shirts and waistcoats, brightly coloured hoodies - back then people told me I looked effeminate - now they tell me I look butch ::).

Oh, and it drives me nuts how many women seem to apologise to each other all the time, and do that little giggle that says "we're harmless, right?" - woman up!

I was on a train platform this afternoon, and a group of young men were "sizing up" the women on the platform, making loud comments about which ones they'd like to do what to. I was watching them closely, wondering whether they're each like that on their own. It all seemed a bit desperate to me, how they all seemed to be competing to be alpha dog.

(I was kind of doing the same thing, but just not out loud ::)).

Quote from: girl you look fierce on November 16, 2012, 02:08:52 PM
Every time I go to the fabric store it is full of girls! like what? Seriously??

Oh my gosh, you write how a stereotypical teenage girl talks.  :laugh:
Honestly, every girl in my English class can't talk properly. We were presenting the pantheons of various cultures, and the girls kept sprinkling the word "like" where it doesn't belong. It was so annoying to listen to their presentations.

Quote from: Padma on November 16, 2012, 03:05:40 PM
I was on a train platform this afternoon, and a group of young men were "sizing up" the women on the platform, making loud comments about which ones they'd like to do what to. I was watching them closely, wondering whether they're each like that on their own. It all seemed a bit desperate to me, how they all seemed to be competing to be alpha dog.

It is pathetic. What's funny is that whenever guys stare at a girl thinking, "Dang, I like the way her ___ looks in those clothes," I'm thinking, "Oh my gosh, I must ask her where she bought that cute ____!"

Quote from: DianaP on November 16, 2012, 03:28:09 PM
What's funny is that whenever guys stare at a girl thinking, "Dang, I like the way her ___ looks in those clothes," I'm thinking, "Oh my gosh, I must ask her where she bought that cute ____!"

...and I'm thinking "Dang, I wonder if she likes girls..." ;D

It confuses me that some people still believe the old fashioned nonsense about women and I wonder what world they live in because it's not the one I do.
However, it also pisses me off when people think females being aggressive is a good thing. No, it's not. Bullying is a serious problem for some people, mugging people is not exactly good either, etc. It's the same as when men are aggressive (I also dislike the double standard).
I think people get aggressive and assertive mixed up.
It confuses that some people make a big deal out of things that don't seem at all important to me. Like if a guy wears a skirt. I don't understand why it's a bad thing or why he'd need therapy or why it's such a big deal. I've seen a few guys who look darn good in skirts. Plus, they're comfy.
It bothers me that cis guy can look and act however he wants and he's still called a guy, but I feel like I have to prove myself. (Which may just be me feeling insecure.)
It annoys me that people try and have tried to categorize me as either masculine or feminine. I'm both.
I also don't understand why girls sneer at other girls for being girly. Why is girly an insult?

Quote from: Padma on November 16, 2012, 03:05:40 PM
I was on a train platform this afternoon, and a group of young men were "sizing up" the women on the platform, making loud comments about which ones they'd like to do what to. I was watching them closely, wondering whether they're each like that on their own. It all seemed a bit desperate to me, how they all seemed to be competing to be alpha dog.

(I was kind of doing the same thing, but just not out loud ::)).

In junior high, a group of boys in my class used to do stuff like that whenever they were together, but if you got one of them away from his friends, he'd be more respectful. I think each one thinks that the others are the alphas and are trying to impress them.

Quote from: Edge on November 18, 2012, 09:01:47 AM
It confuses me that some people still believe the old fashioned nonsense about women and I wonder what world they live in because it's not the one I do.
However, it also pisses me off when people think females being aggressive is a good thing. No, it's not. Bullying is a serious problem for some people, mugging people is not exactly good either, etc. It's the same as when men are aggressive (I also dislike the double standard).
I think people get aggressive and assertive mixed up.
It confuses that some people make a big deal out of things that don't seem at all important to me. Like if a guy wears a skirt. I don't understand why it's a bad thing or why he'd need therapy or why it's such a big deal. I've seen a few guys who look darn good in skirts. Plus, they're comfy.
It bothers me that cis guy can look and act however he wants and he's still called a guy, but I feel like I have to prove myself. (Which may just be me feeling insecure.)
It annoys me that people try and have tried to categorize me as either masculine or feminine. I'm both.
I also don't understand why girls sneer at other girls for being girly. Why is girly an insult?In junior high, a group of boys in my class used to do stuff like that whenever they were together, but if you got one of them away from his friends, he'd be more respectful. I think each one thinks that the others are the alphas and are trying to impress them.

"Girly" and "sissy" are insults because only about 80 years ago women were deemed "the weaker sex" by our patriarchal society. Men believed that women could only do "girl" things and guys shouldn't do "girl" things because it made them "weak". Not only that, but back then women couldn't own anything and were treated like crap by their husbands.

Women's studies anyone? Lol

Quote from: Keira on November 18, 2012, 12:05:55 PM
"Girly" and "sissy" are insults because only about 80 years ago women were deemed "the weaker sex" by our patriarchal society. Men believed that women could only do "girl" things and guys shouldn't do "girl" things because it made them "weak". Not only that, but back then women couldn't own anything and were treated like crap by their husbands.

Women's studies anyone? Lol

Ok then how come girls and young women in the 21st century are using and have used "girly" as an insult?

Quote from: Edge on November 18, 2012, 12:13:52 PM
Ok then how come girls and young women in the 21st century are using and have used "girly" as an insult?

I think violent and macho views of power and strength have really pervaded our society. On another thread there was a discussion about the movie "Brave", where a girl is portrayed as a hero for studying (and using) weaponry instead of what her parents think she is supposed to do.

A more nurturing, care-giving view of heroism is less respected by our culture. I wonder if it is a function of the media entertainment available to us. A film or a video game where the hero comforts and supports someone would not turn the profit seen from those where the hero shoots and blows things up. A sport where the object is to see who could offer the most support would be laughed off the airways in favor of one where the strongest teams wins by elbowing the other out of the way and scoring a touch down.

Maybe because of this, we lose sight of softer, gentler forms of heroism. Soft becomes an insult even among females among whom it used to be a virtue.

Quote from: Edge on November 18, 2012, 09:01:47 AM
It confuses me that some people still believe the old fashioned nonsense about women and I wonder what world they live in because it's not the one I do.
However, it also pisses me off when people think females being aggressive is a good thing. No, it's not. Bullying is a serious problem for some people, mugging people is not exactly good either, etc. It's the same as when men are aggressive (I also dislike the double standard).
I think people get aggressive and assertive mixed up.
It confuses that some people make a big deal out of things that don't seem at all important to me. Like if a guy wears a skirt. I don't understand why it's a bad thing or why he'd need therapy or why it's such a big deal. I've seen a few guys who look darn good in skirts. Plus, they're comfy.

Oh my, skirts are SUPER COMFY!  :) Also, what kind of people do you talk to that think anyone mugging someone is good, boy or girl?

I sometimes feel guilty, though: I actually feel satisfied when I take part in traditional female roles. My friend was sick once and his mom went to work, so I took care of him like a private nurse. It felt nice.  :)

Quote from: agfrommd on November 18, 2012, 01:21:11 PM
I think violent and macho views of power and strength have really pervaded our society. On another thread there was a discussion about the movie "Brave", where a girl is portrayed as a hero for studying (and using) weaponry instead of what her parents think she is supposed to do.

Maybe because of this, we lose sight of softer, gentler forms of heroism. Soft becomes an insult even among females among whom it used to be a virtue.

I think that's only because a nurturing movie would be considered boring. People go to the movies for ENTERTAINMENT. Explosions and arrows are action and stimulation, thus, entertainment. I don't, however, think that people don't respect softer heroism. Ghandi didn't fight at all and he is considered a great modern hero.

However, I just got back from my EMT class and we were practicing patient assessment. This includes feeling the patient for any abrasions, punctures, etc. My partner practiced on me and was firm, but gentle and I was so turned on, so I don't know what kid of girls you're talking to that don't like softer guys. Who says guys have to be rough?  ::)

Quote from: Edge on November 18, 2012, 12:13:52 PM
Ok then how come girls and young women in the 21st century are using and have used "girly" as an insult?

Why do people who are transgender hate themselves (internalized trans phobia) ?

Why do gay men hate themselves because they are gay?

Why do women (most) obsess over what they wear or how they look?

Because society reinforces its artificially constructed ideals and norms. We're all just rats in a giant Skinner box called society. It pokes, prods and finally rewards us when we decide to be "normal".

Quote from: DianaPAlso, what kind of people do you talk to that think anyone mugging someone is good, boy or girl?

People who clearly don't know the definition of "aggressive." Before I moved, there was an article about a gang of teenaged girls who were mugging people on the west side. There's also all the bullying that gets reported (and has ended in death in some cases). That's what I think about when I hear people say that aggressiveness in girls is good. :P I have heard also a lot of jokes about female on male abuse. It's not funny. I don't know the sources of those, but there are a lot.
(That behaviour in anyone isn't good.)

I must be dense because when I saw mugging I automatically assumed we were talking about girls mugging cameras all duck faced and stuff... *leaves thread ashamed*

Snowpaw, are you blonde?

I'm just kidding!  :laugh:

I don't even know where to start with this stuff. I wish things were not categorized like this at all.

My best friend will say "that's because you are a girl" and look at me like he deserves a cookie. And I don't know to explain how incredibly crappy and invalidated that makes me feel. I had an emotional reaction to that thing, not because I happen to be female, but because I happen to be me.

It absolutely breaks my mind, the people who transition because they want to be treated like a woman. I hate it so much. I hate it nearly as much as when I was treated like a boy. Why can't you just treat me like a person? Why is that not a thing? Why are your assumptions about what is or is not between my bloody legs so relevant to every single aspect of my life?

And please, please stop calling me "lady." What about the men's clothing and the lack of makeup and the dyke haircut makes you think I want to be called that?

The worst part is that I know none of them are trying to be mean. They are actually just trying to behave like they are supposed to. They are being polite. It's me that is wrong. That doesn't fit.

Most of the time I can tune it out.

But some days are bad. 

:-\

Quote from: DianaP on November 18, 2012, 05:26:50 PM
Snowpaw, are you blonde?

I'm just kidding!  :laugh:

Just my bangs kinda. Why do you ask?  :o

Quote from: Snowpaw on November 18, 2012, 06:57:28 PM
Just my bangs kinda. Why do you ask?  :o

It was a joke in reference to the stereotype that blondes are... dense.

Quote from: Sarah7 on November 18, 2012, 06:45:17 PM
and look at me like he deserves a cookie.

It absolutely breaks my mind, the people who transition because they want to be treated like a woman. I hate it so much. I hate it nearly as much as when I was treated like a boy. Why can't you just treat me like a person? Why is that not a thing? Why are your assumptions about what is or is not between my bloody legs so relevant to every single aspect of my life?

What is with that whole cookie thing? I've seen that so many times around here.  ???

As for being treated like a person, there are some undeniable differences between genders. A lot of differences are only stereotypes, but a lot are also valid. If there weren't any real differences, being trans would be pointless.  :-\

And who says that ladies can't be logical?  :P

Hey wait a second... I think you were pokin' fun at me! :O *pounce*

Quote from: DianaP on November 18, 2012, 07:50:47 PM

As for being treated like a person, there are some undeniable differences between genders. A lot of differences are only stereotypes, but a lot are also valid. If there weren't any real differences, being trans would be pointless.  :-\

I thought the only difference was physical? Am I wrong? Maybe an eased state of mind that allows you to expand upon yourself? Idk ??? Can I get an example? I thought people were just all over the spectrum regardless of gender.

But for me, I really hate the gamer girl attitude- like a girl is somehow a special flower because she plays video games... and how it is assumed that all women are nurturing and love children. Like I was at work one day cleaning up a cage in the front office for a kitty cat and some man said to me, 'hon, you're gonna make a good mother one day!' like it was supposed to be a compliment. Yikes! My coworkers got a good laugh out of that though since it is so far from reality :laugh:

Quote from: DianaP on November 18, 2012, 07:50:47 PM
What is with that whole cookie thing? I've seen that so many times around here.  ???

It's just a saying. Don't know where it comes from originally. It means that someone is expecting accolades that are not going to be forthcoming.

QuoteAs for being treated like a person, there are some undeniable differences between genders. A lot of differences are only stereotypes, but a lot are also valid. If there weren't any real differences, being trans would be pointless.  :-\

Sigh... I'm not sure how to respond to that. I'm not the same kind of trans as you. If you are genuinely curious, you can ask. But I'm not going to justify my existence. If you want to think I'm pointless, that's okay. You are entitled to your opinion.

QuoteAnd who says that ladies can't be logical?  :P

I don't remember saying anything about logic in my post? I said that I don't like being called a lady. And that I don't like having my reactions gendered. That's about it.

Quote from: Sarah7 on November 18, 2012, 09:01:09 PM
It's just a saying. Don't know where it comes from originally. It means that someone is expecting accolades that are not going to be forthcoming.

Sigh... I'm not sure how to respond to that. I'm not the same kind of trans as you. If you are genuinely curious, you can ask. But I'm not going to justify my existence. If you want to think I'm pointless, that's okay. You are entitled to your opinion.

I don't remember saying anything about logic in my post? I said that I don't like being called a lady. And that I don't like having my reactions gendered. That's about it.

I appreciate the cookie clarification.

I wasn't calling you pointless. I don't think that anyone is pointless. I was just stating my opinion that there has to be some sort of difference before/after transition, even if it's only that you are more comfortable. Probably should've made that clear.

As for the rhetorical question about logic, that was a rhetorical allusion to the common stereotype that women are illogical as an implied contradiction to it. It wasn't directed at you. Probably should've made that more clear, too.  ???

I apologize for the misunderstanding.

Quote from: muffinpants on November 18, 2012, 08:57:29 PM
I thought the only difference was physical? Am I wrong? Maybe an eased state of mind that allows you to expand upon yourself? Idk ??? Can I get an example? I thought people were just all over the spectrum regardless of gender.

But for me, I really hate the gamer girl attitude- like a girl is somehow a special flower because she plays video games... and how it is assumed that all women are nurturing and love children.

Oh, well I was referring to physical differences. Probably should've made that clear. As for something else, women tend to be a bit less restrained when it comes to displaying emotion, mainly because it's deemed ok by society and evolution for them to do so, but it's a real difference, nonetheless, since it stems from a natural effect of estrogen on the brain to make women more emotionally connected.

I also don't want kids. They are so darn annoying!

As for the gamer-girl thing--> Shh, don't ruin that; it could actually work in my favor.  ;)

Quote from: DianaP on November 18, 2012, 09:08:15 PM

Oh, well I was referring to physical differences. Probably should've made that clear. As for something else, women tend to be a bit less restrained when it comes to displaying emotion, mainly because it's deemed ok by society and evolution for them to do so, but it's a real difference, nonetheless, since it stems from a natural effect of estrogen on the brain to make women more emotionally connected.

I also don't want kids. They are so darn annoying!

As for the gamer-girl thing--> Shh, don't ruin that; it could actually work in my favor.  ;)

Gotcha, I can understand that. I was pretty much crazy until I started taking some meds, now I like to think I can control my emotions and be more logical. It's something that I really hate to admit but it's true  :embarrassed:

Quote from: DianaP on November 18, 2012, 09:08:15 PM
I wasn't calling you pointless. I don't think that anyone is pointless. I was just stating my opinion that there has to be some sort of difference before/after transition, even if it's only that you are more comfortable. Probably should've made that clear.

I guess I don't see how what you said and what I said are contradictory then? I was assigned male at birth and altered my physical form to as closely approximate the norms for female as I can in an effort to treat my dysphoria. Because of that people now categorize me as "girl" and treat me according to the cultural and social norms attached to that category. I don't particularly enjoy this experience. No more than I enjoyed the experience of being categorized and treated according to the cultural and social norms for "boy." But at least I don't feel so screwed up about my body anymore, which is pretty important, because otherwise I'd probably be dead.

I would really prefer if my behaviours, preferences, and presentation were not constantly gendered. I find it unpleasant and alienating. I would rather, as I said, be treated as a person, rather than a gender. But mostly I can deal with it, and I try to spend time around other people who don't obsessively gender everything.

For me there is a distinction between my physical form, which is female, and my gender identity, which seems to be MIA. ;)

Oh, I misunderstood you. I thought you were talking as though gender was completely irrelevant and didn't matter, thus making changing gender presentation moot. That was my mistake. I'm sorry.

Quote from: DianaP on November 18, 2012, 09:45:15 PM
Oh, I misunderstood you. I thought you were talking as though gender was completely irrelevant and didn't matter, thus making changing gender presentation moot. That was my mistake. I'm sorry.

No worries, just a misunderstanding on both sides. I'm sorry too. <3

So much for the stereotype that girls are catty with each other.  :P

Quote from: Sarah7 on November 18, 2012, 06:45:17 PM
My best friend will say "that's because you are a girl" and look at me like he deserves a cookie. And I don't know to explain how incredibly crappy and invalidated that makes me feel. I had an emotional reaction to that thing, not because I happen to be female, but because I happen to be me.

It absolutely breaks my mind, the people who transition because they want to be treated like a woman. I hate it so much. I hate it nearly as much as when I was treated like a boy. Why can't you just treat me like a person? Why is that not a thing? Why are your assumptions about what is or is not between my bloody legs so relevant to every single aspect of my life?

And please, please stop calling me "lady." What about the men's clothing and the lack of makeup and the dyke haircut makes you think I want to be called that?

The worst part is that I know none of them are trying to be mean. They are actually just trying to behave like they are supposed to. They are being polite. It's me that is wrong. That doesn't fit.

Most of the time I can tune it out.

But some days are bad. 

:-\

I know exactly what you mean. I have had that very same look from a hetero male friend of mine. I just don't get why people feel the need to stereotype so readily. What? Is the world going to be sucked into a deep black vortex if we don't conform?

Quote from: Edge on November 18, 2012, 09:01:47 AM

It confuses that some people make a big deal out of things that don't seem at all important to me. Like if a guy wears a skirt. I don't understand why it's a bad thing or why he'd need therapy or why it's such a big deal. I've seen a few guys who look darn good in skirts. Plus, they're comfy.
It bothers me that cis guy can look and act however he wants and he's still called a guy, but I feel like I have to prove myself. (Which may just be me feeling insecure.)

But,but don't the Polynesian men wear something that looks like a skirt (and they even have flowers on some of them)? But what about the Roman legionaries and the guys in Spartan armies? (They wore what looked a lot like a skirt to me) And what about kilts? I don't know but guys throwing around logs in what looks like a skirt to me. And that is suppose to be unmanly? HMMMMM  It just seems some of it's culture and not written in concrete so to speak.

I'm starting to notice that girls being shy in class may not be a stereotype so much as a valid observation.  ???

Quote from: SarahM777 on December 07, 2012, 07:08:42 AM
I don't know but guys throwing around logs in what looks like a skirt to me. And that is suppose to be unmanly?

Caber tossing is the ultimate manly sport that doesn't involve fighting another person. :P (jk)

According to one of my guy friends, a man's thought process is basically, "feed me, f*** me, and shut the heck up."  :laugh:

It's not stereotypes that bother me it's the constant Chauvinism that finds itself on the internet (and in the same time they use stereotypes)...

Bad Driving is the one I laugh at. I assure you a teenage male cannot drive safely. Actually I have met more males that cannot drive than woman. It's not to say one is more inferior. It just seems that one is more... careful about it. But hey everyone is different.

Before I defined myself as Bi-Sexual and than being a transwoman, I used to despise that men were not allowed to cry. I had a discussion in lengthy discussion about this with a therapist. It seems that men, decided that crying was womanly and decided to remove this because they fancied humans as being logical...

Yes humans are more logical than other animals. But we as humans are far more emotional as well. Just think about it. We pride ourselves with our "sentience", which is "to feel" in latin, sentit (french).

I don't know it's just this idiotic dogma that bugs me. 

Quote from: SarahM777 on December 07, 2012, 07:08:42 AM
But,but don't the Polynesian men wear something that looks like a skirt (and they even have flowers on some of them)? But what about the Roman legionaries and the guys in Spartan armies? (They wore what looked a lot like a skirt to me) And what about kilts? I don't know but guys throwing around logs in what looks like a skirt to me. And that is suppose to be unmanly? HMMMMM  It just seems some of it's culture and not written in concrete so to speak.

That's called a tunic. Tunics aren't womanly. Actually they existed before pants did, pants are kind of uncomfortable in Greece or Rome... it get's hot and humid.

Sparta was a City State in Greece :) , if you want to know ANYTHING about Greece, I might know. I'm not the most knowledgeable about Greece, but it fascinates me...

Quote from: Freyja_Joro on December 18, 2012, 05:23:44 PM

That's called a tunic. Tunics aren't womanly. Actually they existed before pants did, pants are kind of uncomfortable in Greece or Rome... it get's hot and humid.

Sparta was a City State in Greece :) , if you want to know ANYTHING about Greece, I might know. I'm not the most knowledgeable about Greece, but it fascinates me...

I knew that but I was trying to be facetious,I didn't mean it seriously  :P

one of the things that irk me is "well, I'm a girl now....time to be submissive."

This type of thinking, in my opinion is backwards thinking. So many ciswomen strive to be independent and assertive and equal and then I see some trans girls who say "when I become a girl, I am going to be totally submissive."

That type of belief gives a stereotype that a female must be timid, someone who cannot be a leader or someone who cannot be seen as an equal. And it also gives me the impression that the transwomen who can't wait to be submissive because they will be a woman tells me that they affirm the stereotypes that men typically are the leaders.

That bothers me the most.

You can be a woman and be a leader and non submissive.

The stereotype that all men act like cavemen. I'm an intellectual, intelligent, I love thought and creativity, and I will absolutely, under no circumstances, use the whole "I'm a guy, you should have expected this out of me" excuse on myself or anyone else. Bill Cosby did a segment about this, actually. Very funny, and sadly accurate. Many guys think this is an okay way to act, but it just gives women another excuse to hate men for being stupid and ignorant.

I hate the whole "sex for nothing other than sex makes you a slut/douche" stereotype, for both males and females. Two consenting adults, no one else's business.

On the other hand, I hate the "all guys think about is sex" stereotype. Sex is a big part of my life. So is food. So is science. So is worrying about my bills. So is feeding my gecko. Get over it.

Also, the "guys only love thin, blonde women." I love chubby girls (and no, not a just a little pot belly, I love big, curvy women) and brown hair/brown eyes is the sexiest combo ever. It's funny, my fiance is thin, blonde, and green-eyed. But I love him dearly.

So many stereotypes out there that I really do not care for.

Quote from: Freyja_Joro on December 18, 2012, 05:23:44 PM
Bad Driving is the one I laugh at.

My mother would disagree. She swears that women are the worst drivers on the planet.

Quote from: Karen on December 18, 2012, 06:48:31 PM
My mother would disagree. She swears that women are the worst drivers on the planet.

I for one suck at driving.  :P

As for the stereotype that girls all listen to K-Pop trash: A bunch of girls asked me to turn up my i-pod when they figured out that I was listening to Frank Sinatra. Some people do know good music.  ;D

Quote from: Karen on December 18, 2012, 06:48:31 PM
My mother would disagree. She swears that women are the worst drivers on the planet.

as a former Insurance Underwriter, I completely agree with you. Women are the worse drivers but there rates are cheaper because when they have accidents they are more than likely not to kill anyone. If a man has an accident, they are more than likely to kill someone.

At least according to the numbers

Quote from: DianaP on December 18, 2012, 06:54:12 PM
As for the stereotype that girls all listen to K-Pop trash: A bunch of girls asked me to turn up my i-pod when they figured out that I was listening to Frank Sinatra. Some people do know good music.  ;D

All of my girl friends (two words) listen to the same types of music. Metallica, Disturbed, Tool, etc. I've never heard someone call them unladylike for it either. I like that stuff too along with musicals, classical, and Nightwish. Taste in music has nothing to do with gender.

Quote from: Karen on December 18, 2012, 07:01:03 PM
Taste in music has nothing to do with gender.

Duh. That's why I put it on a stereotype thread.  :P

Quote from: DianaP on December 18, 2012, 07:02:36 PM
Duh. That's why I put it on a stereotype thread.  :P

I was mainly just saying that I've never heard that stereotype. I've never known anybody that pigeon-holed people based on music.

Quote from: Karen on December 18, 2012, 07:13:09 PM
I was mainly just saying that I've never heard that stereotype. I've never known anybody that pigeon-holed people based on music.

cant say that I have either

Quote from: Karen on December 18, 2012, 07:01:03 PM
Taste in music has nothing to do with gender.

There is certain music that is marketed towards a certain gender/age bracket (One Direction/Justin Bieber). I actually like a few of Bieber's songs. Am I fan? eh, wouldn't go that far, lol.

A stereotype that gets on my nerves is "chick flicks". What because a movie features romance or drama I'm supposed to shun it?

A week or so ago, I went to pick out some boxer briefs (I think that's the common term) for me to try out wearing, with an additional view to seeing how they get on with my packer. Aesthetics are important to me, I like to look good, as that makes me feel good, so I spent a bit of time on it. Also, I felt that, as this was my first time exploring this with my trans consciousness, that I should not treat it lightly, and that manifested in me agonising over whether I wanted shorts with stars, stripes, or robots. A female friend was with me, and she found this amusing, and we had a laugh about it, and that helped alleviate the anxiousness.

However, when she got home and told her boyfriend that I had spent 20 minutes choosing men's underwear, her boyfriend said "She's not a bloke then. Unless she's a gay bloke."

This annoyed me on a number of levels when it was relayed to me. My outward response was "Well, yeah, I am a gay bloke!" and laughed it off, but inside I felt like I wasn't being taken seriously. The assumption that only women and gay men care about their appearance infuriates me.

I remember when I was a guy, buying underwear was going into the store, grabbing a couple of packages from the rack that was my size and then finding a cash register with the shortest line.

Quote from: Simon on December 18, 2012, 07:20:34 PM
A stereotype that gets on my nerves is "chick flicks". What because a movie features romance or drama I'm supposed to shun it?

I have a theory on that one which may be baseless since I'm trans, lol. But anyway, I'm thinking that a lot of guys use that label to identify movies that will make them teary eyed, which is not permitted, so they just avoid them altogether. So called chick flicks do tend to be very emotional, for me at least.

Quote from: DeeperThanSwords on December 18, 2012, 07:49:02 PM
Also, I felt that, as this was my first time exploring this with my trans consciousness, that I should not treat it lightly, and that manifested in me agonising over whether I wanted shorts with stars, stripes, or robots.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.topman.com%2Fwcsstore%2FTopManEU%2Fimages%2Fcatalog%2F85A65EMUL_thumb.jpg&hash=97d406bd83e675243f2995069a92a04dcb901115)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmediaus.topman.com%2Fwcsstore%2FTopManUS%2Fimages%2Fcatalog%2F52J53EBLE_thumb.jpg&hash=b5710b73d3b7af6487b253680392467a4715efbc)

Honestly, my wardrobe is so shabby. After transition, I'd bet my time in stores will increase exponentially. Seriously, women have so much more to choose from, so it takes longer.  :P

Quote from: DeeperThanSwords on December 18, 2012, 07:49:02 PM
However, when she got home and told her boyfriend that I had spent 20 minutes choosing men's underwear, her boyfriend said "She's not a bloke then. Unless she's a gay bloke."

The assumption that only women and gay men care about their appearance infuriates me.

Don't let that assumption infuriate you. Since you are a gay man just see it as he was affirming your identity.

As a straight guy I go in the underwear aisle, look for my size, look at the fabric type/fitting style, glance at the often dull color choices (I buy Hanes or Fruit of the Loom...no fancy stuff), and toss them in the cart. I will say I bought new boxers for the first time in about a year a few weeks ago because I needed them for surgery. Otherwise I rarely buy new underwear until they wear out. Even though 90% of the time I am only wearing boxers and T shirts around the house.

I do spend 20 minutes looking at the hats and trying them on sometimes.

QuoteThe assumption that only women and gay men care about their appearance infuriates me.

My brother is straight as an arrow and takes more time in the bathroom in one day then I do all week. :P Acne cleansers, excessive tooth brushing, hair styling, shaving, chest waxing... He loves his appearance as much as he loves women! :P

Quote from: Seb on December 18, 2012, 09:32:43 PM
My brother is straight as an arrow and takes more time in the bathroom in one day then I do all week. :P Acne cleansers, excessive tooth brushing, hair styling, shaving, chest waxing... He loves his appearance as much as he loves women! :P

How does he get time to meet women?! Lol!  :laugh:

Quote from: DianaP on December 18, 2012, 08:02:05 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.topman.com%2Fwcsstore%2FTopManEU%2Fimages%2Fcatalog%2F85A65EMUL_thumb.jpg&hash=97d406bd83e675243f2995069a92a04dcb901115)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmediaus.topman.com%2Fwcsstore%2FTopManUS%2Fimages%2Fcatalog%2F52J53EBLE_thumb.jpg&hash=b5710b73d3b7af6487b253680392467a4715efbc)

The socks are great, but the underwear is a tad too garish for my taste.  :laugh:

Quote from: DeeperThanSwords on December 18, 2012, 07:49:02 PM
The assumption that only women and gay men care about their appearance infuriates me.

My big brother, is married to a woman, and he has more clothes than she does... and it looks really nice :) . But that's my family, artistic, and on average has a fashion sense... (Yes!)

Quote from: DeeperThanSwords on December 18, 2012, 07:49:02 PM
The assumption that only women and gay men care about their appearance infuriates me.

As a general assumption, I do agree with this. But being one with a crap ton of zits and scars... I've got to look somewhat presentable, right? I mean Chewbacca doesn't look like Leonardo Dicaprio, but he's still got friends he wants to present himself to, right?

Quote from: Simon on December 18, 2012, 08:51:34 PM
I do spend 20 minutes looking at the hats and trying them on sometimes.

This is alot of fun. The best part is when you actually have the time and money to get one of the hats.


As for what I hate..

The general idea that all men are ->-bleeped-<-s.

I hate that.

Just because I was born with a dick doesn't mean I can't be nice.

Nor does it mean I want to make your life miserable.

It's partially why I went into entertainment. I want to make you happy. If I do that, it'll make us both happy. And 2 happy people are better than 1 happy person, right?

Quote from: concrete Building on December 28, 2012, 10:54:21 PM
As for what I hate..

The general idea that all men are ->-bleeped-<-s.

I know. It's like some kind of reverse sexism. You hate men, so it's ok, right? No! I'd bet a lot of women don't even know the word "misandrist."

I've never understood the reverse __ism thing or liked it. I dunno. Maybe I just don't know the proper definition or something, but it seems like it implies that prejudice, stereotyping, and/or discrimination towards a group of people is not the same as prejudice, stereotyping, and/or discrimination against another group of people. It implies inequality.

I think it means prejudice against the group that formerly oppressed others, such as "reverse racism" against whites (which is stupid).

I suppose that makes sense if one sees the entire group as one rather than individuals, but that in itself is a problem.

Quote from: DianaP on December 29, 2012, 09:38:40 AM
I think it means prejudice against the group that formerly oppressed others, such as "reverse racism" against whites (which is stupid).

What the heck is "reverse racism"? The opposite of it? Wouldn't that mean not racist? The same term, without the reverse prepended, should be used no matter who the parties are involved for whatever term is being used to denote prejudice or whatever.

Quote from: Emily52736 on December 29, 2012, 10:20:05 AM
What the heck is "reverse racism"? The opposite of it? Wouldn't that mean not racist? The same term, without the reverse prepended, should be used no matter who the parties are involved for whatever term is being used to denote prejudice or whatever.

Yes, I think we established that already.  :P

The stupid stereotype that only guys can like video game music//good rock.

Super Smash Bros. Brawl theme
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PInuVXgxO1g (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PInuVXgxO1g)


Sonic the Hedgehog soundtrack: With Me by Crush 40
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgMnpLLTcmM (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgMnpLLTcmM)

Quote from: DianaP on December 29, 2012, 10:24:15 AM
Yes, I think we established that already.  :P

Oh. Sorry. I only read the last post  :P