Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: anibioman on December 04, 2012, 10:24:34 PM Return to Full Version

Title: name change
Post by: anibioman on December 04, 2012, 10:24:34 PM
so my name change went through and i got my authorized order last friday i changed it with my school monday. today my english teacher actually commented on it because she knows im trans and is pretty cool even though she is a horrible teacher.

also im having a lot of relationship/dating perspective issues which is good because thats a normal high school problem. just felt like sharing also people who knew me from before treat me 100% like a guy and it makes me happy.
Title: Re: name change
Post by: FTMDiaries on December 05, 2012, 04:11:44 AM
Congrats! :)
Title: Re: name change
Post by: spacerace on December 05, 2012, 05:32:21 AM
congrats.

I remember when I changed my name and got all my stuff updated,  I even liked looking at my name on my check card when I  was paying for stuff at a store.
Title: Re: name change
Post by: DriftingCrow on December 06, 2012, 10:40:24 PM
Congrats on your name change!

I need to do more research on this topic, but it was really easy for me to change my last name when I got married with Social Security, and I hear it's just as easy to change it back if you get divorced.

When I get divorced I want to change my last name back to my original last name, can I just change my first and middle names while I am at it? I had a coworker who wanted to change his name, but said he would have had to pay a bunch of money and jump through all these hoops for it; is it normally hard to change your name and they just make it easy for women who get married?
Title: Re: name change
Post by: Schuyler on December 07, 2012, 07:53:05 AM
Quote from: LearnedHand on December 06, 2012, 10:40:24 PM
Congrats on your name change!

I need to do more research on this topic, but it was really easy for me to change my last name when I got married with Social Security, and I hear it's just as easy to change it back if you get divorced.

When I get divorced I want to change my last name back to my original last name, can I just change my first and middle names while I am at it? I had a coworker who wanted to change his name, but said he would have had to pay a bunch of money and jump through all these hoops for it; is it normally hard to change your name and they just make it easy for women who get married?

It partially depends on what state you are in. I know Maryland has a more elaborate process to change your name than Minnesota, for example. When I had my name changed, I had a fee of $150 dollars, paperwork, and a court date (a month of waiting) with two witnesses. My two cents: if you plan on changing your last name, just go through the process of changing your first and middle name too. Might have to pay a bit more (I think the fee is based on your income at the time), but you won't have to stop at the courthouse twice.
Title: Re: name change
Post by: FTMDiaries on December 07, 2012, 09:26:00 AM
I've just done mine (in the UK) - our Deed Poll system allows us to change any or all of our names... but also our titles. So I changed the whole lot: first & second name, and I went back to my maiden surname. But I also changed my title to 'Mr'. :)

UK law allows us to call ourselves by any name or title we choose as long as we're not trying to pass ourselves off as having qualifications or honourary titles that we don't have. So you can call yourself Mr, Mrs, Miss, Ms., Mx. regardless of your gender or sex.... but not Dr, Prof, Lord, Lady, etc. unless you can prove you have a right to use those titles. And of course, you can't choose an offensive name.

Such a shame. I would've loved to have added 'Lord' as my title. Or perhaps 'Prince' - yes, I like the sound of that. 'Prince von FTMDiaries' would've been fun. ;)
Title: Re: name change
Post by: Brooke777 on December 07, 2012, 11:24:49 AM
I just got my name changed last week. It cost $90 and I had to appear in front of a judge. Aside from that it was easy. As far as social security goes, I just had to send them a copy of my ID before, and a copy of it after, my birth certificate, the court order, and a form. They will send all the documents back with my new card, so it was easy. I changed my first and middle names. I think it is easier to get it all done at once than to spread it out.
Title: Re: name change
Post by: Jason on December 12, 2012, 05:19:09 AM
Quote from: FTMDiaries on December 07, 2012, 09:26:00 AM
I've just done mine (in the UK) - our Deed Poll system allows us to change any or all of our names... but also our titles. So I changed the whole lot: first & second name, and I went back to my maiden surname. But I also changed my title to 'Mr'. :)

UK law allows us to call ourselves by any name or title we choose as long as we're not trying to pass ourselves off as having qualifications or honourary titles that we don't have. So you can call yourself Mr, Mrs, Miss, Ms., Mx. regardless of your gender or sex.... but not Dr, Prof, Lord, Lady, etc. unless you can prove you have a right to use those titles. And of course, you can't choose an offensive name.

Such a shame. I would've loved to have added 'Lord' as my title. Or perhaps 'Prince' - yes, I like the sound of that. 'Prince von FTMDiaries' would've been fun. ;)

FTM Diaries , I see you are from UK. Can I ask you when did you change your name, before the Assessment or before the Gender Identity Clinic.  How far in the process are you? I mean I am now at the beginning, going to meet the Psychologist next week (from the Assessment team) and bit nervous...
Title: Re: name change
Post by: FTMDiaries on December 12, 2012, 08:18:14 AM
Quote from: Jason on December 12, 2012, 05:19:09 AM
FTM Diaries , I see you are from UK. Can I ask you when did you change your name, before the Assessment or before the Gender Identity Clinic.  How far in the process are you? I mean I am now at the beginning, going to meet the Psychologist next week (from the Assessment team) and bit nervous...

Hi Jason

I've seen my GP & Community Mental Health Team, who have referred me to Charing Cross. I'm still waiting for that appointment to come through though (apparently they have an Admin backlog)... but waiting ages is driving me up the wall. So I've given myself a Christmas/birthday/the-hell-of-it-present and booked an appointment with a private Gender Therapist, who I'll be seeing in mid-Jan. He's the one who suggested I show commitment by changing my name before seeing him - but I rather suspect that's due to our correspondence and my age (I'm 41).

Don't worry about the assessment - the initial meeting is just to check you're not nuts. And don't worry if you have issues such as depression or anxiety: they pretty much expect that. Just be honest about how you feel now; what it was like for you growing up; where you need to be in the future. My initial assessment with the local team ended with the psychologist wishing me good luck on my journey... :)

So yeah, I'm pre-everything at the mo. I've been dressing exclusively in male clothing since June and I came out to my family in July. However, I've had gender dysphoria since 1976; it's just taken me ages to pluck up the courage to do something about it.

I know we're not supposed to advertise, so I'll just advise you to Google 'Deed Poll'. The service I used is the first one that comes up in your search results (but I used them on recommendation). It was very quick & painless and everything is done by post. I paid for the archiving service (in case I ever lose the original) and had 5 legal copies made: the whole thing set me back £55 and took just over a week.

Good luck!
Title: Re: name change
Post by: Jason on December 12, 2012, 10:36:43 AM
Thank you very much for the information and the advice.

I am 31 and can't wait to start hormone therapy although as you say it will take some time until I even step into GIC. I think there was something like the whole process till you start hormones shouldn't take more than 18 weeks or sort of... (I can only hope lol)

Nevertheless, wishing you good luck in Jan...  :)

P.S. Yeah, I was thinking of using that DP service, but wasn't sure but now I am  ;)




Title: Re: name change
Post by: Jason on December 12, 2012, 10:39:20 AM
Quote from: anibioman on December 04, 2012, 10:24:34 PM
so my name change went through and i got my authorized order last friday i changed it with my school monday. today my english teacher actually commented on it because she knows im trans and is pretty cool even though she is a horrible teacher.

also im having a lot of relationship/dating perspective issues which is good because thats a normal high school problem. just felt like sharing also people who knew me from before treat me 100% like a guy and it makes me happy.

Congrats  :)
Title: Re: name change
Post by: FTMDiaries on December 12, 2012, 10:48:45 AM
Quote from: Jason on December 12, 2012, 10:36:43 AM
I am 31 and can't wait to start hormone therapy although as you say it will take some time until I even step into GIC. I think there was something like the whole process till you start hormones shouldn't take more than 18 weeks or sort of... (I can only hope lol)

18 weeks... yeah right! That's the NHS for you: they may have 'guidelines' and 'targets' but the reality is very different. I saw my local team 17 weeks ago - and whilst Charing Cross received my paperwork from them about 2 weeks later, they haven't processed it yet and my PCT hasn't heard anything from them. As I said, they have a backlog. Hopefully your experience will be better. Anyway... now that you're aware Charing Cross has a backlog, perhaps you can ask to be referred to one of the other clinics if that's convenient?

Quote from: Jason on December 12, 2012, 10:36:43 AM
Nevertheless, wishing you good luck in Jan...  :)

Thanks! I'm nervous as hell as there's so much riding on this. ;)

Quote from: Jason on December 12, 2012, 10:36:43 AM
P.S. Yeah, I was thinking of using that DP service, but wasn't sure but now I am  ;)

Martin Lewis sent me their way and I wasn't disappointed. ;)
Title: Re: name change
Post by: Jason on December 12, 2012, 11:19:55 AM
Don't know to be honest, I live in West London, not so far from the GIC and haven't got a clue about other clinics.   :(

17 weeks, that is really long and unacceptable and then they say they do not want us to mix Private and NHS. I think I'll end up going private as well, eventually.

Don't be nervous , be happy   ;)


Title: Re: name change
Post by: FTMDiaries on December 12, 2012, 11:26:33 AM
Quote from: Jason on December 12, 2012, 11:19:55 AM
17 weeks, that is really long and unacceptable and then they say they do not want us to mix Private and NHS. I think I'll end up going private as well, eventually.

You have every right to mix them, but you must make a decision at your second NHS GIC appointment whether you want to proceed privately or on the NHS. So I'm starting off privately to try to get a head start on the waiting times, and I'll switch to NHS when my appointment eventually comes through.

I complained about this to my local PCT... making trans people wait months & months for treatment is torturous and I'm sure it significantly increases the risk of suicide.  By the time we go to our GPs, we need treatment yesterday.
Title: Re: name change
Post by: Jason on December 12, 2012, 11:35:14 AM
That is good to know. Thank you.