Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So what.

I'm mad at the world. Who cares right?

Everyone I see I feel like they're my enemy.

The people I work for, the people I serve, the people around me when I'm out shopping, the person sitting in the next stall in the bathroom, the family in the mini van that passes me on the highway, the postal worker, Police Officer, the Doctor, the auto mechanic and even those people ringing the bell at the donation buckets.

Everyone is my enemy.

If you can see my face and hear my voice you are my enemy.

Or maybe not.

Maybe it's just in my head.

Maybe no one really cares.

I am nothing, not a threat to myself or others. Just another person getting along in this life hoping that what ever comes next is better.

Or maybe I am the enemy. Maybe everyone sees me as their enemy. The thread that unravels their precious knit sweater.

I want to watch the world burn. I wont start the fire. I wouldn't stop someone else from starting it.

Would I provide the match though?

Anarchy. Chaos. The bump in the road right when your about to take a sip of coffee. The person that walks down the middle of the isle in a parking lot. The empty roll of toilet paper after a dump has been started. The first person to walk on a freshly mopped gas station floor.

Or maybe I'm just bored. Bored with life. Tired of waking up every morning and going to work. Tired of cooking dinner because I'll have to do the dishes. Tired of eating because it's only going to make me maintain my weight or gain it.

Maybe I should smile more often. All the cool kids do it.

Millions of people on this earth are happy with their lives. Feeling love and joy with everything they do.

And I'm mad.

Oh and Happy Holidays everyone.

You forgot the butcher, the baker, and the candlestick maker! Want a foam rubber brick? It will hurt less when you throw it at me. Hugs and Happy Holidays, Devlyn

Ticking away the moments
That make up a dull day
Fritter and waste the hours
In an off-hand way

Kicking around on a piece of ground
In your home town
Waiting for someone or something
To show you the way

Tired of lying in the sunshine
Staying home to watch the rain
You are young and life is long
And there is time to kill today

And then the one day you find
Ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run
You missed the starting gun

And you run and you run
To catch up with the sun
But it's sinking

Racing around
To come up behind you again

The sun is the same
In a relative way
But you're older

Shorter of breath
And one day closer to death

Every year is getting shorter
Never seem to find the time

Plans that either come to naught
Or half a page of scribbled lines

Hanging on in quiet desperation
Is the English way

The time is gone
The song is over
Thought I'd something more to say

Home
Home again
I like to be here
When I can

When I come home
Cold and tired
It's good to warm my bones
Beside the fire

Far away
Across the field
Tolling on the iron bell
Calls the faithful to their knees
To hear the softly spoken magic spell...

(Pink Floyd - Time)

What does it matter?

Who am I fooling?

My soul is screaming for escape but my body wont let it go. There is no help for it. No one can hear its cries for help while this body goes about it's daily duties.

I want to me motivated. I want to be happy. I want to feel good about myself. I want to be able to look upon my past and feel like I've done everything right.

But I can't.

Nothings been right. Everything has been wrong.

Innie not Outie. Short not tall. Bright not dark. Blue eyes not brown. Happy not mad.

Anger.

I'm angry at life.

Fake it 'till you make it.

I'm even angry about things that haven't gone bad in life.

Fake it 'till you make it.

I mean I'm not in bad health.

Fake it 'till you make it.

I'm not in poverty.

Fake it 'till you make it.

I have the love of my family and friends.

Fake it 'till you make it.

Life should be grand.

Fake it 'till you make it.

LivingInGrey...

Welcome to my world. If I threw a foam brick at you, would you throw it back?

Oh, and Happy (new old stock) New Year! ;)

theres allways sleep.

LiG.

It will be all right in the end, and if it isn't then it is not the end.

Girl, you're harshing my mellow.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo4OnQpwjkc (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo4OnQpwjkc)

I think you need a change for something,
Somethimes we may focus on what make us feel bad, somethimes it an exact problem, and somethimes we just stucked in how things is used to be without thinking future on whatever we like it or not.
think of it as a choice or an opurtunaty.

its your life, your always to have diffrent options to go from.
where do you wanna go?
what do you want to focus on your life?

Quote from: LivingInGrey on December 24, 2012, 04:13:35 PM
The bump in the road right when your about to take a sip of coffee. <snip> The empty roll of toilet paper after a dump has been started.

Well, thanks for making me smile today, at least. I hate when these two things happen.  :laugh:

Happy Holidays!!!  :)

*dives for cover expecting a brick to be thrown at her*  :laugh: