Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Some of you are probably wondering why I have posting about sensitive subjects and have seemed argumentative in my posts about various issues as of late. I am still going through a spiritual/mental struggle. I was a fundamental conservative christian just 9 months ago. I have had a hard time internally trying to wrap my head around certain issues, i have been doing my best to see how people feel on the far liberal left and in between.

I apologize to anyone that has been offended by anything that I have said that appears to be hurtful. It is not my goal in life to go around attacking people and I truly hope you can see this is just me working things out. I personally feel that I will be taking a middle of the road approach to issues and try to find a balance that I can be happy with in my heart.

Please know I value your opinions.

Personally, I think you have grown a lot since you first came here.

Meh. Most members here start of like that. Dont worry to much.

As long as you learn its all good. After I was no better I mean I started this thread after all XD(https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,101888.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,101888.0.html))

None the less thank you for apologising because I was offended by a few things you did.

 It's important to have contrary opinions and views, and to be able to share them with others. Sometimes (read: usually) this will upset people because they feel like their views are being invalidated or unheard, but every opinion, true, untrue, or subjective, is valuable as an asset to advancing individual wisdom and knowledge.

Quote from: Kelly J. P. on January 08, 2013, 11:28:12 AM
It's important to have contrary opinions and views, and to be able to share them with others. Sometimes (read: usually) this will upset people because they feel like their views are being invalidated or unheard, but every opinion, true, untrue, or subjective, is valuable as an asset to advancing individual wisdom and knowledge.

I agree.  While many have felt the vitriol that comes from the loudest conservative voices outside of Susan's, there are quiet conservatives within Susan's who also deserve to have the same voice as those who disagree with us, even if our position angers or frustrates someone else.  Conflict is good.

There is also a difference between someone being annoyed at a personality conflict and someone being angered by a philosophical disagreement.  As long as we're patient with each other on both points, we'll avoid the territory-marking and cat-fights that the interwebs tends to breed.

Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on January 08, 2013, 10:40:41 AM
... I was a fundamental conservative christian just 9 months ago. I have had a hard time internally trying to wrap my head around certain issues, i have been doing my best to see how people feel on the far liberal left and in between.

I apologize to anyone that has been offended by anything that I have said that appears to be hurtful ...

No worries Shawn - you have a double burden - trans AND fundamentalist. I would not like to try and reconcile those two. :o

It has been a learning experience for me as well as I have watched you trying to reconcile these two facets of your personality. As a non-believer I cannot help feeling that being very religious is a bigger burden than being trans so in a way I admire you for having the courage to try and find an accommodation that suits you. I hope you succeed.

I'm not offended, and AFAIK you don't need to apologize. :)

Shawn, I welcome your questions and topics. Haven't seen anything from you that I'd call offensive in any way.

Well thanks everyone, In the future i will try to be more observant of how I come across and will be patient in my posts, and refrain from it appearing like a personal attack. I would like to think that everyone who replies does the same thing. I am human like everyone here and I make mistakes and get emotionally charged up like everyone else from time to time. I will just trust that we can be civil to one another in the future.

I think it was the link to a prank video the other day that offended people, and I am truly sorry for that. I will try and post videos (prank or otherwise) that have better taste.

I have gotten blessings and lessons from all of you here. Some of you I don't agree with and some I do. But if we all thought the exact same thing and everyone had the same exact opinion,belief,skills and personality, the world would be very boring. I am learning to treasure diversity.

God Bless you and keep you safe.

Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on January 08, 2013, 12:12:53 PM
I'm not offended, and AFAIK you don't need to apologize. :)

Same.

Never had the slightest problem with you.

Quote from: Brooke777 on January 08, 2013, 10:48:22 AM
Personally, I think you have grown a lot since you first came here.

Agreed-A lot of the questions you have asked in the past were questions I've had too.  No need to apolagize because you never know who you help out through your journey.  For every person who is offended, there are two people that you help.

No need for an apology to me - you've never offended or upset me. :)

No apologies on my account. I don't think you said anything wrong. You introduced a controversial topic. Nothing wrong with that. Sometimes people get a little heated. I might not agree with you but you didnt' say anything wrong imo.

--Jay

It's encouraging to see that you're sensitive to the fact that some posts might have offended, but I'm with those who feel you have a right to express your opinions and discuss them with those who choose to engage in a discussion of them.

Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on January 08, 2013, 10:40:41 AM
i have been doing my best to see how people feel

Most people don't try that hard.  You're making me happy and hopeful and a bit less cynical about humanity :)

And your abortion and polyamory threads are going well.  I'm not sure if there's lots of hidden moderator intervention going on or if people around here are really that good  :o  I guess I'm still a bit cynical  :laugh:

No need to apologise for stating your heartfelt opinion. I've never seen you be deliberately offensive to anyone, so as far as I'm aware you have nothing for which to apologise. The fact that you feel the need to apologise speaks volumes about your character.

Which is more than I can say for another forum in which I also revealed that I considered a late-term abortion. Even after I explained that I only considered it because the baby was at risk of severe brain damage, I was mercilessly attacked for even contemplating it. You did no such thing... and nor did anyone else here. :)

Oh, and that baby I considered aborting? She's 15 years old and a gifted student. :)

You don't need to apologise to anyone!

There will always be people who have different opinions to our own. So the solution do we just ignore our own opinions?
No, we listen to them and then voice our own. Anything beyond that would depend purely on the situation.

Hon, you genuinely have some things to work through - we all do - each one of us carries an emotional baggage that being transgender only adds to.

I hope you're in a better position now...

Hugs

Quote from: FTMDiaries on January 09, 2013, 11:01:19 AM
No need to apologise for stating your heartfelt opinion. I've never seen you be deliberately offensive to anyone, so as far as I'm aware you have nothing for which to apologise. The fact that you feel the need to apologise speaks volumes about your character.

Which is more than I can say for another forum in which I also revealed that I considered a late-term abortion. Even after I explained that I only considered it because the baby was at risk of severe brain damage, I was mercilessly attacked for even contemplating it. You did no such thing... and nor did anyone else here. :)

Oh, and that baby I considered aborting? She's 15 years old and a gifted student. :)

I don't trust those tests, it seems like there's too many stories like that.

Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on January 10, 2013, 12:56:06 AM
I don't trust those tests, it seems like there's too many stories like that.

[TRIGGER ALERT: PREGNANCY/BIRTH DEFECT]

Actually, the problem was rather complicated and perhaps not what you might think. My daughter was one of identical twins but the other twin hadn't formed properly and would never have been viable. Due to their shared blood flow (being identical they shared a placenta) my daughter eventually went into cardiac failure when her heart got tired of pumping blood to both bodies because her twin didn't have a heart. That eventually resolved itself at 26 weeks when the second twin died, but that brought a risk of a part of the second twin finding its way into my daughter through their shared blood supply and lodging itself in her brain, causing a catastrophic stroke. They offered to abort her at 26 weeks because of the risk of brain damage.

Instead, I had daily ultrasounds from 26 weeks onwards to check the blood flow to her brain. If her brain had been severely damaged, we would have aborted no matter how late.

I'm very glad we didn't need to abort her... but I'm also hugely thankful that the offer was there.

One of the reasons I don't take any position on abortion is because I will never have to face up to such worry.

FTMDiaries

What ever options you had chosen, it is obvious that you would have made your decision based upon consideration of the realities.

I cannot imagine having to face up to such decisions. But I do deeply respect you for facing these.

Quote from: spacial on January 10, 2013, 04:26:43 AM
What ever options you had chosen, it is obvious that you would have made your decision based upon consideration of the realities.

I cannot imagine having to face up to such decisions. But I do deeply respect you for facing these.

Thanks Jill.

My decision - either way - was entirely motivated by my daughter's welfare. Whilst she showed no signs of brain damage I believed it was in her best interests to give her every chance to live. But if she was going to be severely disabled to the extent that she'd have no decent quality of life, I believed it would be in her best interests to not force her to suffer if I had the means to prevent it. Others' mileage may vary.

It's a very tough decision, no doubt about that. I'm just glad it turned out well in the end.