Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Cindy on January 17, 2013, 06:01:22 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Another milestone another event. My apologies. But I'm happy.
Post by: Cindy on January 17, 2013, 06:01:22 AM
Post by: Cindy on January 17, 2013, 06:01:22 AM
These post are not to gloat, they are not to make me feel good. Or to even provide good or bad examples.
I have managed to transition quite well. I have had problems. But I'm also a bit of a novel character in that I'm not ashamed of me, I'm not frightened of me, I don't apologise for me.
I hope I'm feminine, but I can roast the skin off most people with my verbal skills. I will happily crucify people who are ignorant of civil acceptance for all people. I will always take the place of a person who is being abused.
I'm nothing special. I'm a woman who a long long time ago gave a commitment to herself that if I survived I would help people in anyway I could. I had to do that because I was going to kill myself. I was trying to overcome rape and torment. I did not want to die. But I had to find a way to live.
Whatever our being is, hides in an elusive manner to be tracked by people of religion and people of science, and just people. What are we? I have no idea, but it goes when we die. It almost went when I regressed into a shell, to be honest I don't think I knew what was happening outside of the shell. The intelligent bit did its job, worked, got degrees. Survived.
Last year the shell was destroyed and I crept out and flexed. I'm proud to flex, and I will talk about being out of the shell.
I will continue to tell of my experiences purely to demonstrate and to build confidence for people who are still in the shell.
I hope I can help.
The Hair Salon 17 Jan 2013
I decided that when I went FT I would not wear my wigs. I was grey haired and kept it very short so I could wear wigs. I had male pattern baldness, I had a bald spot in the middle of the crown.
I hated it all. I did some research and came over Parlour a high class hair salon in Glenelg close to me (you can google it). I first walked in as the shell.
The owner sort of accepted my story that I was TG and wanted help. He told me to come back in 2 months with longer hair. I think he hoped I went away.
I didn't.
I've been several time now and have my own stylist/cutter - Nathan and my own colour tech, Rebecca. They have created my look and yes there will be new avatar photos this weekend.
But that is fine. I feel wanted; not surprised it ain't cheap. But I also feel loved.
At the end of my blow dry and style tonight Nathan said continuing from our conversation that I had no skills in looking after my hair;, yes girls play with their hair from seven yrs old and walk out of the bedroom when they are sixteen and you want to know what they know? Get real. I'm a professional and I can't do what some girls do to their hair. I've seen a girl do French braids with one hand. It isn't possible.
Ok.
I paid my bill and then Nathan called me back. Lets try styling 101. For the next hour he had me ruin his blow dry job teaching me how to use an iron, partition clips, reverse brushing, how to wash my hair, how not to wash my hair, when to wash, how to use curlers (FAIL)
At the end he redid his blow dry.
We were obviously talking and laughing during all of this, my colour stylist joined in, fiercely protecting my fringe. "Whatever ever you do don't touch her fringe". Lots of banter rude jokes and laughs. The other customers just looked lost.
At the end he gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek, as usual. We booked the next appt and then I said, Oh I have a wedding in March not sure what to do. He just said book me in the morning for 30mins and I'll give you a blow dry and have you set.
No they don't 'fancy' me, they are just genuinely nice people.
I'm blessed.
Cindy
I have managed to transition quite well. I have had problems. But I'm also a bit of a novel character in that I'm not ashamed of me, I'm not frightened of me, I don't apologise for me.
I hope I'm feminine, but I can roast the skin off most people with my verbal skills. I will happily crucify people who are ignorant of civil acceptance for all people. I will always take the place of a person who is being abused.
I'm nothing special. I'm a woman who a long long time ago gave a commitment to herself that if I survived I would help people in anyway I could. I had to do that because I was going to kill myself. I was trying to overcome rape and torment. I did not want to die. But I had to find a way to live.
Whatever our being is, hides in an elusive manner to be tracked by people of religion and people of science, and just people. What are we? I have no idea, but it goes when we die. It almost went when I regressed into a shell, to be honest I don't think I knew what was happening outside of the shell. The intelligent bit did its job, worked, got degrees. Survived.
Last year the shell was destroyed and I crept out and flexed. I'm proud to flex, and I will talk about being out of the shell.
I will continue to tell of my experiences purely to demonstrate and to build confidence for people who are still in the shell.
I hope I can help.
The Hair Salon 17 Jan 2013
I decided that when I went FT I would not wear my wigs. I was grey haired and kept it very short so I could wear wigs. I had male pattern baldness, I had a bald spot in the middle of the crown.
I hated it all. I did some research and came over Parlour a high class hair salon in Glenelg close to me (you can google it). I first walked in as the shell.
The owner sort of accepted my story that I was TG and wanted help. He told me to come back in 2 months with longer hair. I think he hoped I went away.
I didn't.
I've been several time now and have my own stylist/cutter - Nathan and my own colour tech, Rebecca. They have created my look and yes there will be new avatar photos this weekend.
But that is fine. I feel wanted; not surprised it ain't cheap. But I also feel loved.
At the end of my blow dry and style tonight Nathan said continuing from our conversation that I had no skills in looking after my hair;, yes girls play with their hair from seven yrs old and walk out of the bedroom when they are sixteen and you want to know what they know? Get real. I'm a professional and I can't do what some girls do to their hair. I've seen a girl do French braids with one hand. It isn't possible.
Ok.
I paid my bill and then Nathan called me back. Lets try styling 101. For the next hour he had me ruin his blow dry job teaching me how to use an iron, partition clips, reverse brushing, how to wash my hair, how not to wash my hair, when to wash, how to use curlers (FAIL)
At the end he redid his blow dry.
We were obviously talking and laughing during all of this, my colour stylist joined in, fiercely protecting my fringe. "Whatever ever you do don't touch her fringe". Lots of banter rude jokes and laughs. The other customers just looked lost.
At the end he gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek, as usual. We booked the next appt and then I said, Oh I have a wedding in March not sure what to do. He just said book me in the morning for 30mins and I'll give you a blow dry and have you set.
No they don't 'fancy' me, they are just genuinely nice people.
I'm blessed.
Cindy
Title: Re: Another milestone another event. My apologies. But I'm happy.
Post by: Jenny07 on January 17, 2013, 06:24:12 AM
Post by: Jenny07 on January 17, 2013, 06:24:12 AM
Cindy
Nothing wrong with being happy. Be proud of it.
It can happen to everyone.
I know most of us struggle and are consumed by our feelings inside and are rarely truly happy.
I've had a good few days myself after a few years of darkness. ;D
About tooting time....
Nothing wrong with being happy. Be proud of it.
It can happen to everyone.
I know most of us struggle and are consumed by our feelings inside and are rarely truly happy.
I've had a good few days myself after a few years of darkness. ;D
About tooting time....
Title: Re: Another milestone another event. My apologies. But I'm happy.
Post by: spacial on January 17, 2013, 07:58:41 AM
Post by: spacial on January 17, 2013, 07:58:41 AM
Nathan sounds really nice. It's good to find a decent hair dresser.
He's right about the experiences that so many little girls have. As a hari dresser, I can imagine he is quite jealous of, for example, making a French braid with one hand. But realistically, not all girls can achieve that.
My wife is obviously an exception but I dread to think of the look she would give me if I asked her if she had managed anything like that!
Thank you so much for the update Cindy. Most of all, it's just good to hear from your corner of the planet!
He's right about the experiences that so many little girls have. As a hari dresser, I can imagine he is quite jealous of, for example, making a French braid with one hand. But realistically, not all girls can achieve that.
My wife is obviously an exception but I dread to think of the look she would give me if I asked her if she had managed anything like that!
Thank you so much for the update Cindy. Most of all, it's just good to hear from your corner of the planet!
Title: Re: Another milestone another event. My apologies. But I'm happy.
Post by: JulieC. on January 18, 2013, 01:55:39 PM
Post by: JulieC. on January 18, 2013, 01:55:39 PM
No one should ever have to apologize for being happy. I'm glad for you.
There is sooo much to learn it's sometimes overwhelming for me.
Yes you are blessed but your blessed because you've taken control of your life and did what you need to do to be happy. Can't wait to see the new "do"
Quoteyes girls play with their hair from seven yrs old and walk out of the bedroom when they are sixteen and you want to know what they know? Get real.
There is sooo much to learn it's sometimes overwhelming for me.
Quote
I'm blessed.
Yes you are blessed but your blessed because you've taken control of your life and did what you need to do to be happy. Can't wait to see the new "do"