Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I have debated about talking to my therapist about mtf surgery. I am pre op and will start HRT in probably late march. I never had an interest in surgery other than Lower Surgery. Now I am thinking about facial feminization surgery and whether or not I really need it at all. A lot of my friends and family don't think I need it. But I don't know. I'm thinking maybe I just feel very dysphoric about my facial features and once I have done therapy for a bit more time, I'll get over it. But then I think that maybe I could benefit form minimal FFS? I have no idea. My Hair line and general facial structure kind of bother me. Who knows?

If you can, do it.

Well, you don't NEED facial feminization surgery. If you feel like it would make you happier to have a more feminine face, then go for it. Otherwise, weigh the costs and benefits. Money, recovery, travel, etc.

I just realized I spelt surgeries wrong thats embarrassing

Fixed!  ;)

Thank you!! Also sorry about my horrible inactivity!!! I am a Film and Media Studies Student so school is an awful awful demon right now with finals preparation.

I havn't even started hormones yet, but for me, FFS seems way more important than SRS. How I look and how others see me is incredibly important to me and is probably where my greatest feelings of dysphoria come from, very quickly followed by my voice. But, I'm starting to get the impression FFS may actualy cost more than SRS, and money isn't exactly easy to find at the moment either way while I'm in college.


...College would probably be the easiest place for me to transition. Unfortunately I don't even know that I have the money for hormones or even to see a therapist yet. That's life I suppose.  :-\

Quote from: Little Red Alt Girl on April 29, 2013, 12:58:02 AM
Thank you!! Also sorry about my horrible inactivity!!! I am a Film and Media Studies Student so school is an awful awful demon right now with finals preparation.

Education is everything.

Stick in an tell us how everyone else reacts when you come top of your class! 

Bug Huggggs

Quote from: AmyBosch on April 29, 2013, 07:55:18 AM

...College would probably be the easiest place for me to transition. Unfortunately I don't even know that I have the money for hormones or even to see a therapist yet. That's life I suppose.  :-\

Just a thought, but could you make a start on those bits you can afford?

Appearance? Clothes? Telling those whom you choose to? Seeing the college councilor for advice? Join a decent LGBT group?

I don't want to sound like I'm talking against any steps a person can take to feel better about themselves, but I do feel like there are a *lot* of girls who seriously undercut themselves in the facial department. There are a lot of different facial types out there, an not all women look exactly the same. As some have mentioned here, hormones do have an effect and makeup is also a serious help when it comes to looking more classically feminine.

I guess I'm just saying, your face is a big part of what makes you a unique human being. If there's any part of your body you might be able to learn to love for what it is, your face might be a good place to start.

Quote from: PrincessLeiah on April 29, 2013, 10:43:30 AM
I don't want to sound like I'm talking against any steps a person can take to feel better about themselves, but I do feel like there are a *lot* of girls who seriously undercut themselves in the facial department. There are a lot of different facial types out there, an not all women look exactly the same. As some have mentioned here, hormones do have an effect and makeup is also a serious help when it comes to looking more classically feminine.

I guess I'm just saying, your face is a big part of what makes you a unique human being. If there's any part of your body you might be able to learn to love for what it is, your face might be a good place to start.

I agree with this.  FFS is not always needed.  Some people can benefit from it, but others really don't have to worry about going through with it.  Since it is a major expense and I'm frightened of surgeries, I personally will wait a year after hrt to make a determination of whether I would need it or not.  I would imagine most people would like to reduce the amount of surgeries and the overall cost that their transition presents to them. Having said that, it is best to follow your own instincts and do what you want and/or are comfortable with. 

Yeah i am starting to think that FFS is not a really big thing for me any more. Especially because a lot of people tell me I already have a super girly face and that my features will soften and that my hairline is not as big a deal as i make it out to be. So at this point all I really want is lower surgery. Maybe breast augmentation but my cousin (God Bless her soul for being so supportive) was a little too gung ho about my transition and was like oh you can get a boob job and it could look really great and showed me a pik of a fabulous boob job but then was like you have to do your research on the surgeon you want becaue you could get a botched job and then proceeded to show me an awful boob job gone wrong with the chest all concave and everything. But she just meant for me to do a lot of research before jumping into any thing. But I am also very reluctant to do a lot of surgery because a lot of my family is like it isnt natural. and because I am a very argumentative person I want to retort very loudly with, "HEY THESE ARE MY BITS THEY REAL AND MADE OF MY OWN STUFF AND THIS IS MY REAL HAIR NOT A WIG AND THESE ARE MY REAL BOOBS. SO EFFE OFF." They really regret my birth mother teaching me to question everything.

Assuming you can afford it, the only real criteria is whether or not they will make you feel better and more confident.  For some it really does mean the difference between passing or not.  There were things that always bothered me.  So yes, I had my eyelids fixed, had some hair transplants done, and rhinoplasty.  I am glad I did these small things. I found ways to get insurance to pay part of the bill as well.  They make me feel better.  I have no idea if that will be the case for you.  Just remember, though, these things are irreversible.

I wish you the best luck!

Kristi

Well maybe if I should you guys a picture of me. You guys can give your opinions? Here is  le moi (http://i1224.photobucket.com/albums/ee370/RJCStars/20130215_175404_zps19f88d54.jpg)

Personally, I don't think you will need it.  I think you look good and would have thought you have already started hrt.  Honestly, I wouldn't worry about.  Of course, it's entirely up to you and you should do what you feel is for the best :)

I have appointment with plastic surgeon for Wednesday for a possible face lift & maybe some other FFS procedures. My face is nice however it is just not feminine enough.

I'm looking forward to some nice changes I hope.

Thanks learning to live that really does mean a lot. I think you are the last person i need to hear that from to make my decision. With such and overwhelming majority of people thinking I already started hrt, I don't think I will need surgery beyond lower surgery. Maybe breast augmentation but that frightens me.

Holy carp, yeah LittleRedAltGirl, I don't think you have much to be worried about. The thing about hormones is that their effects are slow, subtle, and amazingly significant over the long term. My first month on HRT was basically me constantly trying to figure out if anything was happening or not. Now it's two months and I'm already starting to see some of the changes. There's always the wish that you could just snap your fingers and instantly look and feel the way you want, but we are biological organisms and we don't work that way. You just have to live into it, embrace the process and realize that the yearning and impatience you feel for it to happen faster is just one more thing you share with all girls who've gone through this same process, at whatever age.

The problem with Dysphoria is that you yourself don't see what everyone else sees.  It took me a long time to realize that it's not just about what you see in the mirror, it's about how your brain intercedes and mucks things up for you too.  You could have FFS and *still* not be happy.  I know I have good and bad days, despite everyone I know (including those who don't know me "before") telling me I have a pretty/feminine face, I can still literally think one minute I look "ok" and the next that I look all blokey and stuff, and getting mired in depression- EVEN THO I'M CONSCIOUS OF THE FACT that I seemingly looked ok just a little while ago! #stupidbrain

If a dysphoric person asks another dysphoric person for an opinion.. does it cancel out?  ;D

For my part, let me just say that I know several cis (afaik!) women and girls who don't look a million miles different from you :) - and yes HRT will have its inexorable but slow effect too.

Oh my gosh thank you guys that really does mean a lot. I have been chatting with my therapist and she told me that once I have a physical done and check my hormone levels she'll write up the letter for hormone replacement therapy. I am super excited!!! But strangely (not really?) enough I feel very confident within myself, like yes they are ncie to have but they don't define me. I define myself they I want to? Does that make sense? I mean yes I have bad days and good says but I am learning to manage them. Well point being is that I feel really confident within myself to manage my dysphoria and that hrt is nice to have but I know within myself that I am me and that's great. Nothing should define be aside from me. Any way I'm rambling, I jsut wanted to say thank you for the support.

Yay!  I'm glad that you will be starting hrt soon.  I'm starting estrogen in exactly one week from now and it is one of the most amazing feelings to have.  I see you are going through something similar.  I guess we can call it the pre-approved hrt high,lol.