Site News and Information => Introductions => Topic started by: Tessa James on February 16, 2013, 01:09:56 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Coming out again with a new name
Post by: Tessa James on February 16, 2013, 01:09:56 PM
Post by: Tessa James on February 16, 2013, 01:09:56 PM
Good morning all,
While I have made a few previous posts, I take this opportunity to reintroduce myself as Tessa James. I have corresponded with our fabulous global moderator from down under, Cindy James and she understands me and knows this is not a name grab.
I was given the name James Bernard with that middle name being the same as the father I once so loathed. I often called him "the very best example of the man I would never want to be." He has passed on and I am in a wonderful transition to be the more feminine self I once was only able to imagine.
I came out as "Bi" back in the 80s but I found that label to be inadequate as my transgender identity was missing and I find the binary model not applicable for me. Like many of us, I identify much closer to feminine on the masculine-feminine spectrum. I want to help others in my personal community to understand me but, it is a challenge for folks to think about the grey zone. The "I am a woman in a man's body" statement is real and true for others but, way to polarized for me. I am comfortable in the middle 2/3s of life and happily accept complexity. Neat and tidy may be my wardrobe but not my identity. Typically only our close family and friends want to engage in that level of getting to know us anyway?
And so as we travel these meandering paths to self awareness and identity, lets raise a cheer for the genderqueer, the shades of grey and all colors of the rainbow.
Love, hugs and warm fuzzies,
Tessa James
While I have made a few previous posts, I take this opportunity to reintroduce myself as Tessa James. I have corresponded with our fabulous global moderator from down under, Cindy James and she understands me and knows this is not a name grab.
I was given the name James Bernard with that middle name being the same as the father I once so loathed. I often called him "the very best example of the man I would never want to be." He has passed on and I am in a wonderful transition to be the more feminine self I once was only able to imagine.
I came out as "Bi" back in the 80s but I found that label to be inadequate as my transgender identity was missing and I find the binary model not applicable for me. Like many of us, I identify much closer to feminine on the masculine-feminine spectrum. I want to help others in my personal community to understand me but, it is a challenge for folks to think about the grey zone. The "I am a woman in a man's body" statement is real and true for others but, way to polarized for me. I am comfortable in the middle 2/3s of life and happily accept complexity. Neat and tidy may be my wardrobe but not my identity. Typically only our close family and friends want to engage in that level of getting to know us anyway?
And so as we travel these meandering paths to self awareness and identity, lets raise a cheer for the genderqueer, the shades of grey and all colors of the rainbow.
Love, hugs and warm fuzzies,
Tessa James
Title: Re: Coming out again with a new name
Post by: Jamie D on February 20, 2013, 03:22:04 PM
Post by: Jamie D on February 20, 2013, 03:22:04 PM
Tessa, I well remember your first introduction!!
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,133738.msg1063812.html#msg1063812 (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,133738.msg1063812.html#msg1063812)
In that post our senior moderator (and I wish to emphasize SENIOR) called me a birdbrain. :o
Those Aussies are a nervy lot.
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,133738.msg1063812.html#msg1063812 (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,133738.msg1063812.html#msg1063812)
In that post our senior moderator (and I wish to emphasize SENIOR) called me a birdbrain. :o
Those Aussies are a nervy lot.
Title: Re: Coming out again with a new name
Post by: Devlyn on February 20, 2013, 05:17:51 PM
Post by: Devlyn on February 20, 2013, 05:17:51 PM
Hi Tessa, I'll join you in that cheer for the genderqueer and non binary peoples! Who wants to live in a world without lots of flavours? Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: Coming out again with a new name
Post by: gennee on February 21, 2013, 12:32:20 PM
Post by: gennee on February 21, 2013, 12:32:20 PM
Hi Tessa and welcome. I love diversity and there shouldn't be any roadblocks on who someone can be.
:)
:)
Title: Re: Coming out again with a new name
Post by: Maegan on February 21, 2013, 01:26:38 PM
Post by: Maegan on February 21, 2013, 01:26:38 PM
Hi Tessa,
So nice to meet you (again). :-*
Finding peace is the greatest feeling, isn't it?
Huggs
Maegan
So nice to meet you (again). :-*
Finding peace is the greatest feeling, isn't it?
Huggs
Maegan
Title: Re: Coming out again with a new name
Post by: Tessa James on February 22, 2013, 02:06:19 AM
Post by: Tessa James on February 22, 2013, 02:06:19 AM
Thank you for the upbeat welcome messages Yes transition is fun and a "peace" I had never known. I had a medical appointment today and may start HRT within a week or too if my labs all check out. I am SO excited. Can't wait to get that ticker on my profile and feel the changes.