Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I went to see my GP just over a week ago about starting my transition, and everything went well, and he's going to refer me to a someone soon. But lately, I've been wondering if this is really what I want to do. I don't know if it's just because I don't really interact with people that much, and so I'm almost never treated like a girl, or if I'm just not supposed to do this.
Sometimes I think about how easy life would be if I just stayed male, went back to uni and forgot about the whole thing, but then I'm also worried about what people would think about me if I did that, and I'd probably end up having the same feelings again later in life.
I could really do with some help right now, as I'm starting to think I might have made a big mistake.

Thanks in advance,
Kate.

Hi, sorry to hear you are feeling down and I think it's pretty normal to have trepidations going into it.  But, if you think you might be transgender, then you probably are, since I don't think that cis people even consider it.

Hello Kate, well first I wanna say change can be very scary! I know whenever things change in my life, even in a somewhat minor way, but a way that will be semi-permanent if not fully permanent, I do experience a bit of stress and anxiety and wonder if I made the right choice. That's very normal to experience those sorts of things. Sometimes you just have to throw caution to the wind and do what you feel is right, not what is easiest or what would make others happy. This is your life, you only get one (depending on your beliefs :P) and you should live it fulfilled! Not hiding away because you are worried about what others will think of you. If I lived my life doing what's easiest, I'd never leave the bed! and I hear from most that the feelings never go away.. I wish you luck in making your decision, Kate, hope some of this helps!

I have doubts all the time, and sometimes it's more overwhelming than others.  Rather than asking yourself "what would other people think of me?"  try asking  "what would I think of me?".  Would you have any regrets over not transitioning?  Remember, this is something you do for yourself and not for others.  I hope everything goes well, Kate!

Quote from: EmSchuma on February 17, 2013, 09:29:24 AM
I have doubts all the time, and sometimes it's more overwhelming than others.  Rather than asking yourself "what would other people think of me?"  try asking  "what would I think of me?".  Would you have any regrets over not transitioning?  Remember, this is something you do for yourself and not for others.  I hope everything goes well, Kate!

I dropped out of uni so I could be at home with my family during my transition, but they haven't been very supportive, so I don't really feel like I can be myself all that much. At the moment, I really want to just have a normal life, and not have to worry about all the problems that come from being transgender, the main problem being finding a relationship again. Before I came out as transgender, it wasn't too hard for me to be in a relationship, but now it seems impossible to find anyone who would want to be with me. I'm starting to think that I'm not transgender, because I just felt like I was different to other guys, but maybe that's all I am, different. I don't have to completely change, I could just stay male and settle with being different to most people. I'll give things a lot of thought before making a decision, because otherwise I might make the wrong decision and then change my mind again at a later date.

Quote from: MissHayleyKat on February 17, 2013, 09:03:02 AM

Sometimes I think about how easy life would be if I just stayed male

I have these thoughts sometimes. But then I remember you only live once! And I know I will spend the rest of my life regretting not being myself if I chose the easy path. And I don't think the easy way is that easy.

Quote from: MissHayleyKat on February 17, 2013, 09:03:02 AM
I'm starting to think I might have made a big mistake.

Are you seeing a therapist?You should probably get these feelings sorted out before moving forward. But I think we all have doubts its natural with something this life changing.

Quote from: Heather on February 17, 2013, 09:41:47 AM
Are you seeing a therapist?You should probably get these feelings sorted out before moving forward. But I think we all have doubts its natural with something this life changing.

I'm not seeing a therapist yet. Right now, I feel like I'd regret it if I continued to live as transgender, I'm not a very strong person, and I don't think I'd be able to cope with the difficult times very well.

Yes it is difficult but also liberating. Having a good support environment around you should make it much easier.

Quote from: MissHayleyKat on February 17, 2013, 09:45:46 AM
I'm not seeing a therapist yet. Right now, I feel like I'd regret it if I continued to live as transgender, I'm not a very strong person, and I don't think I'd be able to cope with the difficult times very well.

I don't think you know how strong a person you are until your tested. A year ago I could not see myself being in the spot I am today. I was to scared to really face this. I had to learn to get over the fear of what people would think of me and accept who I am. I've been through a lot of ups and downs in the last year but its been all worth it. It does take courage to be trans but it also takes courage to live just don't count yourself out! I do you think you should find a good therapist. My therapist has helped me through a lot. And helped me accept myself more than I ever thought possible! ;D

I'd like to thank everyone for their help and support today. I'm feeling much better now, I'm not really sure what came over me earlier :)

Hey that's what we're here for. Glad you are better now!