Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I find that there is a new generation (up to age 25ish) who are completely clear on who they are or need to be.  For those of us deep in our careers, relationships and self-perceptions, the decision to transition, or the extent of the transition is not as simple.  I would love to hear from people supporting their (coughs) "mature" loved ones through their transition.

If 40s is mature, then I'm vintage! Loving the single life myself, the only support I give is here to my mature and (coughs) immature family. Hugs, Devlyn

Giggles.  Thanx for your response Devlyn.  And reading through some past posts, I see many of us are 'mature/vintage' laughs.  I feel like I have finally found somewhere I can relax and be me.  Thanx to all of you!

I'm way past vintage.

68

Without mentioning any names, I think we have some members who can call a 68 yo youngster.

For me, I'm a baby at 57.

But I think you're dead right Christelle, the youngest generation are more certain of where they are going. I can't begin to say how utterly proud of every one of them I am and totally happy for them.

I really think this generation is going to make a real and positive difference to the world.

Quote from: spacial on April 04, 2013, 07:36:10 PM
Without mentioning any names, I think we have some members who can call a 68 yo youngster.

For me, I'm a baby at 57.

But I think you're dead right Christelle, the youngest generation are more certain of where they are going. I can't begin to say how utterly proud of every one of them I am and totally happy for them.

I really think this generation is going to make a real and positive difference to the world.

If your a baby at 57 then I'm a new born at 47.

It's good to feel like a kid... at 56 & 5/8ths  ;D

Back to seriousness  :(  I am in a sort of a unique situation. My wife is an MTF. We first met well over 30 years ago when she was pre-op. We spent many intense evenings, and a few very intense weeks as the big decision time came around for her, with me playing devil's advocate. I wished I could have been like her and done all she did to reach that point, while at the same time fighting my own demon doing all I could Not Too even think about getting to that point. Yep, no prob argueing both sides of THAT problem. Same for her knowing what life on the other side(s) is like and all that she may be giving up, and for what?

For the past few years she's been repaying the favor

Upper 40's here...single, not really looking, just being (and doing) myself.

  ;)

I'm still young. :)

Quote from: Beth Andrea on April 04, 2013, 09:03:36 PM
Upper 40's here...single, not really looking, just being (and doing) myself.

  ;)

I'm still young. :)

<biting tongue, walking away>

Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 04, 2013, 09:10:20 PM

<biting tongue, walking away>

What, you want pics or somethin'??

:o

Better idea, I'll be right over!

"Can Beth come out and play?"

I am also one of the FOPs that are here.  I just turned 59.  Now if I could just get an SO.

Quote from: Ms. OBrien CVT on April 04, 2013, 10:39:15 PM
I am also one of the FOPs that are here.  I just turned 59.  Now if I could just get an SO.

I presume you don't want a so-so SO?  :angel: I know a few so-and-so's...I've sewn for an SO. 

And what is an "FOP"?

I'm... technically not 40. Not for another 20 days, at least, and let me tell you it scares the holy bajeezus out of me. I joke that I'm going through the ultimate mid-life crisis, but there's a definite fear that it's too late for me to do anything about it, and that I have to be stuck being who I was, which I hate.

Quote from: Shodan on April 04, 2013, 10:42:50 PM
I'm... technically not 40. Not for another 20 days, at least, and let me tell you it scares the holy bajeezus out of me. I joke that I'm going through the ultimate mid-life crisis, but there's a definite fear that it's too late for me to do anything about it, and that I have to be stuck being who I was, which I hate.

It's all numbers. Think about it like this: If you were to die in a month, that means your "40" is no longer a mid-life crisis...you had that when you were 20, but you just didn't know about it.

I've met people who  were young 40's, and were already half-dead, due to giving up on life...and I've met 90's and 100-year olds who are fit and focused, going full throttle until (literally) the day they died.

Some of what happens is chance...the rest is your choosing what perspective you'll accept. (Now if I could just change my focus...eh, it's a work in progress)

:)

FOP = Flippin' Old Person

Quote from: Ms. OBrien CVT on April 04, 2013, 10:57:21 PM
FOP = Flippin' Old Person

I've seen you, you're not THAT old! You look good!  :)







*hugs*

Aren't you sweet. 

*hugs*

Yeah, I know. It's one thing to intellectually know something and another to emotionally accept it as truth. This is a problem that I've been struggling with all my life.

I'm a 60 yr old teenager with bad attitude to boot.

Quote from: Shodan on April 04, 2013, 11:23:42 PM
Yeah, I know. It's one thing to intellectually know something and another to emotionally accept it as truth. This is a problem that I've been struggling with all my life.

Yeah, I'm discovering this myself...before HRT, I had basically a flatline emotion scan...now it's pretty rambunctious...

51 MTF here. I came out at 48 and have now been on my HRT for 1 year.

I am so old, I fart dust.

Hi,

Im an interesexed female at age 65  will be 66 .  aug 11

I knew what i was at age 10. & totaly no doughts  about that, there was no transition for me im just liveing as i allways have it was more about   how people percived me , was the issue or accepted who i was,  every one knows now for sure im just a woman a mature one at that,

...noeleena...

Quote from: Jamie D on April 05, 2013, 03:18:36 AM
I am so old, I fart dust.

I thought that was what you are?

You guys and gals have really managed to give me that virtual hug  :)  It is astounding to me how many of you have the courage to take the plunge and transition 'later'.  Besides the hysterically funny and adventurous situation of double PMS, double mid-life crisis, menopause (me) and puberty (my lovely partner)... I am finding this to be one of the most liberating and frightening experiences of my life.  Challenging my own pre-conceptions and bias is a big one (as open minded as I thought I was lol).

But the one thing that humbles me, is the strength a transgender person needs and has.  I tip my hat to all who live with dysphoria, those who make peace with their external not matching their internal, and those who stamp their foot down in defiance, ripping off the closet doors, and leaping, head first into the unknown.  And how fortunate those of us are who get to witness the growth and congruence that blossoms right before our eyes.  It is a sneak peak into miracle-making  ;D

Without being flippant, or maybe being flippant, dealing with TG is like banging your head against a wall. It's great when you stop.

Being me is fantastic. I didn't even know or realise that people are usually happy. I lived a day to day crawl of life waiting for it to end.

What you wake up and want to get out of bed?

Geex it took me two or three hours to try and get brave enough to look from under the blanket, and then I was motivated by not wanting to wet myself, or worse, booze kept me going, and I had a good job and brains ambition and everything.

I was lucky.

Now I'm me FT and very very happy and life is fantastic and I sleep at least a few hours a night 'cos there is so much to do and so much to live for.

And why?

Because I was born a woman in the wrong body. Great, it took me for ever to deal with it.

And now? I'm a woman in a modified body, and I can live as me.

Great! Now why would that take someone from a depressed, alcoholic suicidal drunk with an IQ bigger than a phone number who was trying to drink its self to death to being a happy outgoing well connected sociable, respected and loved woman whose opinion is sought and who respects herself and enjoys life.

No idea, but I'm really glad I found a way of being me whatever age I am!

My love to you and your partner. You sound wonderful and I'm very pleased to meet you!

Hugs

Cindy

Well, we're over 25 but under 40. :) (We're both 35.) I'm not sure if that qualifies to you or not - but we're both "more established" in our lives than a lot of people our age. We've been married 13 years, together for 18, and bought a house and settled down into the same careers and employers over a decade ago. No kids, though.  There are definitely days when I feel old... but that was true even at 25 when all our friends were still in the carefree partying phase.

My wife transitioned when we were both 32, though we only managed to afford GRS this past summer.

Quote from: Jamie D on April 05, 2013, 03:18:36 AM
I am so old, I fart dust.

You're a poofer?

;)

Quote from: Christelle on April 05, 2013, 05:25:33 AM
You guys and gals have really managed to give me that virtual hug  :)  It is astounding to me how many of you have the courage to take the plunge and transition 'later'.  Besides the hysterically funny and adventurous situation of double PMS, double mid-life crisis, menopause (me) and puberty (my lovely partner)... I am finding this to be one of the most liberating and frightening experiences of my life.  Challenging my own pre-conceptions and bias is a big one (as open minded as I thought I was lol).

But the one thing that humbles me, is the strength a transgender person needs and has.  I tip my hat to all who live with dysphoria, those who make peace with their external not matching their internal, and those who stamp their foot down in defiance, ripping off the closet doors, and leaping, head first into the unknown.  And how fortunate those of us are who get to witness the growth and congruence that blossoms right before our eyes.  It is a sneak peak into miracle-making  ;D

Ah, how sweet! Thank you, and give yourself a pat on the back, too. SO's have just as much a struggle as we do, and appreciate the effort.

*hugs*

Don't worry. I'm just a natural blonde.

If the the qualification for this thread is by biological age; I ........ just ....... qualify. I'm a bit over 40.
However, if it's perceived age, well I'm sorry I'll have to leave. 34 doesn't cut the ice.

Nice to have met you all though.

<*Catherine last seen wandering off in her blonde haze attempting to start a thread for the under 40's *>

Quote from: Christelle on April 05, 2013, 05:25:33 AM
You guys and gals have really managed to give me that virtual hug  :)  It is astounding to me how many of you have the courage to take the plunge and transition 'later'.  Besides the hysterically funny and adventurous situation of double PMS, double mid-life crisis, menopause (me) and puberty (my lovely partner)... I am finding this to be one of the most liberating and frightening experiences of my life.  Challenging my own pre-conceptions and bias is a big one (as open minded as I thought I was lol).

But the one thing that humbles me, is the strength a transgender person needs and has.  I tip my hat to all who live with dysphoria, those who make peace with their external not matching their internal, and those who stamp their foot down in defiance, ripping off the closet doors, and leaping, head first into the unknown.  And how fortunate those of us are who get to witness the growth and congruence that blossoms right before our eyes.  It is a sneak peak into miracle-making  ;D

Hi Christelle,
I am 55 and met my present wife 8 years ago. I told her about my gender issues almost from day one but at the time, neither of us realized how far it might go.

If I have been able to "stamp my foot down in defiance" (BTW, I haven't really done it like that... :)) and "leapt headfirst into the unknown"  ( yes without any doubt..) , her support and acceptance has been a key enabler.

What has come out of that is quite an exceptional level of trust, confidence and love between us . I would trust her with my life and believe that this is mutual.

On a completely different level, I believe she has also come to see that having a husband who also knows how to be quite a good wife has some  advantages... :)  We are no doubt quite an atypical couple but also a much happier couple than so many I know.

So yes, I can understand why you must find having a TG partner quite frightening and I know it requires a huge amount of adjusting, but if you can find it in you to see it through, to allow your partner to really be true to herself,you may very well find yourself in a far better place than you ever imagined.

Wishing both of you the very, very best.
Donna