Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hello everybody! my name is Michelle im 22years old and im a MTF transexual. Im from Bolivia but i live in Sweden so my english is not the best :) aah also.. this is my first post :)
I have been on estrogen and spiro for 7 months and i must say that everything is going pretty well, the changes are bigger than i expected and im passing atleast 85% of the time.
I work at the airport as a check-in agent for different airlines and that means that i meet alot of new people all the time. I havent told my collegues that im transexual yet, they know me for my old name because i started at that job at the same time i started hormones, so they just assume im a VERY femenine gay guy.
We have uniforms at my job, and they are quite similar, some girls have skirts and other pants, guys must wear a tie and girls a scarf. Even dough i wear a tie i get called for "she" by almost all the passangers everyday, i even get compliments and some male passangers have flirted with me very clrearly, lol there is even this guy that hits on me very often that works at the airport and he doesnt know im ts.
What bothers me is that there are still some passangers that call me "he" most females.. and it hurts so much! i just dont know what the reason is? im still working on my voice.. and i get called she most of the time so i guess its quite convincing.. so i wonder if it could be the uniform? i dont have a very masculine face and i wear discret makep so i really don get whats "revealing" me?
Have you experienced this before?

yes. when the uniforms are really gender specific like that people tend to go by those. alot of people will still go by what they see in your overall appearance but some not so much. is it possible to see if they will let you wear a scarf and not a tie?

Welcome, amazed91.

For our new members, please be sure to review

• Site Terms of Service and rules to live by  (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
  
• Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
  
• Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
  
• Age and the Forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,62197.msg405545.html#msg405545)
  
• Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
  
• Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
  

My suggestion would be for you to talk with your supervisors about transitioning on the job, and perhaps gradually incorporating aspects of the female uniform into your own (like the scarf, to begin with, rather than the necktie).  In time, you will certainly end up in the fully female uniform.

Quote from: Tristan on May 14, 2013, 03:45:27 PM
yes. when the uniforms are really gender specific like that people tend to go by those. alot of people will still go by what they see in your overall appearance but some not so much. is it possible to see if they will let you wear a scarf and not a tie?

You think so? well that would mean me coming out at work :/ i dont know if i dare beacuse i relly need to work and save money for ffs. You never now how a company takes ts issues.. :/

Its great that you have a nice job in a wonderful country...enjoy the positive comments and greetings you are getting, it will only get better for you :)

Meantime, research your companies policies and procedures to see how your transition will fit into your workplace.

Welcome to Susans!   Nice to have you here :)

I think it's the uniform. BTW, you are in Sweden? i watch that channel Ask A Transsexual and the woman who does it is from  Sweden! It's great I love her she is so awesome and blunt and has all sorts of good info.

Quote from: Michelle G on May 14, 2013, 04:18:48 PM
Its great that you have a nice job in a wonderful country...enjoy the positive comments and greetings you are getting, it will only get better for you :)

Meantime, research your companies policies and procedures to see how your transition will fit into your workplace.

Welcome to Susans!   Nice to have you here :)

Thanks alot Michelle! :) yeah the positive coments really make my days! can turn a bad day into a good one hehe.
I will do so! thanks for the advice ;)

To be honest, I wouldn't think there is anything malicious going on.  If I saw that there was different outfits for genders, I might refer to the person based on their outfit (depending on the circumstance).  While that is problematic in many ways, I don't want to assume anyone's gender.  For all you know some people might think you are a transitioning ftm and wouldn't want to insult you by saying she,lol.  Maybe I think to deeply about this because of my experience with GID, but I look out for these things.  However, I understand what you are saying.

If you are ready to come out, it might be a good idea to talk to your employer.  Maybe they will let you wear the scarf instead of the tie?  If you are worried about your employer discriminating against you, I would check out their companies policy.  They might be accepting of this, though there are always some risks. Also, I would research discrimination laws within your locality.  I can't imagine Sweden's anti-discrimination laws wouldn't cover gender identity, but since I live in the U.S, I can't say for certain. 

Like you said, you're passing 85% of the time right? And frequently men show interest in you. If you can handle it (I know it sucks to be misgendered), I'd say to just go on as you are, and after saving up the money you want to save up for ffs, then let your employers know? Because then you have less to lose.

But if it's really really distressing for you, then yeah, go with what Jamie said :)

Good luck!

Uniform. Flat out.

Consider that these are travellers, they want to check in and board the plane. The person at the counter may cause them to do a double take, but if they are in doubt, the safest and quickest option is to go by the external gender markers. You're in a male uniform = ergo you're male. Easiest way for them to get their ticket w/o thinking too much. If they are interested in you, as you indicated some are, then they will tend to go with what they want to see vs. the quicker route of the uniform.

Regards to transitioning on the job, you may want to check the local laws in Sweden in terms of discrimination. If the airline you work for has an LGBT organisation, then I would also suggest meeting with a representative, but laws first.

(oh, and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_rights_in_Sweden  (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_rights_in_Sweden) :))

Uniform, for sure.

You may want to read your company's TG policies. Perhaps in a few more months it will be so obvious that the uniform will not matter.