Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Anna++ on June 10, 2013, 09:06:12 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Anna++ on June 10, 2013, 09:06:12 PM
Post by: Anna++ on June 10, 2013, 09:06:12 PM
When I was trying to be a boy, I was a bit of a loner. I had friends that I would see every now and then, but could also go entire weekends where I didn't set foot outside or interact with people. And I was okay with being left alone! It gave me plenty of time to try and control my gender identity issues, and that's not something I wanted other people to find out about.
I'm less okay with spending time alone now :). I've been able to have something going on most nights of the week, generally with a mix of people that I am and am not out to (I assume they'll catch on eventually). On the flip side, I find myself getting lonely quicker now. Tonight was a rare night where I didn't have plans, and I found myself disappointed that there wasn't anybody to hang out with. I don't expect to have me-time again until Friday, so I forced myself to enjoy it :D
It's good that I don't want to isolate myself from people anymore. I'll turn myself into a productive member of society in no time! :P
I'm less okay with spending time alone now :). I've been able to have something going on most nights of the week, generally with a mix of people that I am and am not out to (I assume they'll catch on eventually). On the flip side, I find myself getting lonely quicker now. Tonight was a rare night where I didn't have plans, and I found myself disappointed that there wasn't anybody to hang out with. I don't expect to have me-time again until Friday, so I forced myself to enjoy it :D
It's good that I don't want to isolate myself from people anymore. I'll turn myself into a productive member of society in no time! :P
Title: Re: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: King Malachite on June 10, 2013, 09:51:45 PM
Post by: King Malachite on June 10, 2013, 09:51:45 PM
Great! :)
Title: Re: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Ltl89 on June 10, 2013, 09:59:28 PM
Post by: Ltl89 on June 10, 2013, 09:59:28 PM
Good news :)
Don't feel bad about having alone time though. Sometimes having space from other is healthy in doses. So, no need to feel lonely. Enjoy your me time when you get it. Just don't get too much of it.
Don't feel bad about having alone time though. Sometimes having space from other is healthy in doses. So, no need to feel lonely. Enjoy your me time when you get it. Just don't get too much of it.
Title: Re: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Nov413 on June 11, 2013, 01:27:52 AM
Post by: Nov413 on June 11, 2013, 01:27:52 AM
I totally feel you! I remember how much time I spent alone before I began living full time. I barely had friends and I certainly never thought I could handle a lot of people.
But now, I'm way more open and hang out a lot more. Not only that, but I have better friends than I used to.
I really can't wait for the future, whatever that looks like.
But now, I'm way more open and hang out a lot more. Not only that, but I have better friends than I used to.
I really can't wait for the future, whatever that looks like.
Title: Re: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Cindy on June 11, 2013, 04:18:55 AM
Post by: Cindy on June 11, 2013, 04:18:55 AM
This resonates so much!!!!
He was always alone.
Now I have to have a schedule to do handle my life; do stuff here, go out with friends, (who are all new, well they would have to be - he never had any!!) do the house work and do all the other stuff to keep me going, so I should do some tonight!
Nah, bugga that; I'll go out :laugh:
He was always alone.
Now I have to have a schedule to do handle my life; do stuff here, go out with friends, (who are all new, well they would have to be - he never had any!!) do the house work and do all the other stuff to keep me going, so I should do some tonight!
Nah, bugga that; I'll go out :laugh:
Title: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Jen-from-IL on June 11, 2013, 05:32:20 AM
Post by: Jen-from-IL on June 11, 2013, 05:32:20 AM
Quote from: Anna! on June 10, 2013, 09:06:12 PM
When I was trying to be a boy, I was a bit of a loner. I had friends that I would see every now and then, but could also go entire weekends where I didn't set foot outside or interact with people. And I was okay with being left alone! It gave me plenty of time to try and control my gender identity issues, and that's not something I wanted other people to find out about.
I'm less okay with spending time alone now :). I've been able to have something going on most nights of the week, generally with a mix of people that I am and am not out to (I assume they'll catch on eventually). On the flip side, I find myself getting lonely quicker now. Tonight was a rare night where I didn't have plans, and I found myself disappointed that there wasn't anybody to hang out with. I don't expect to have me-time again until Friday, so I forced myself to enjoy it :D
It's good that I don't want to isolate myself from people anymore. I'll turn myself into a productive member of society in no time! :P
Wow, this was my life to the letter. My interactions with people were very limited and like you, I would lock myself in my house for entire weekends. I won't say I don't still do that at times, but it's much less often. I'm more open with my friends, willing to be more social and just enjoy life.
Title: Re: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Ciara on June 11, 2013, 07:51:43 AM
Post by: Ciara on June 11, 2013, 07:51:43 AM
Its good to have nice friends to go out with and enjoy your spare time. Too much time on our own much an make us unsociable and lead to lonliness. However some "me time" is important too. Time to be nice to yourself, time to look after yourself, time to pamper yourself.
Everything in moderation I suppose.
I'm glad you're not a loner.
Love,
Ciara.
Everything in moderation I suppose.
I'm glad you're not a loner.
Love,
Ciara.
Title: Re: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Northern Jane on June 11, 2013, 01:27:03 PM
Post by: Northern Jane on June 11, 2013, 01:27:03 PM
I turned out to be exactly the opposite kind of person after transition/SRS. I had been quiet, shy, uncomfortable around strangers and preferring the company of a very few close friends. After transition/SRS (like DAYS after!) I was social, outgoing, friendly, bold and brash, and not the least bit reserved! I would then walk up to total strangers and strike up a conversation. I guess I never really connected with people until I became me - then the connection came easily.
Title: Re: Less of a loner now =)
Post by: Anna++ on June 11, 2013, 05:07:42 PM
Post by: Anna++ on June 11, 2013, 05:07:42 PM
Quote from: learningtolive on June 10, 2013, 09:59:28 PM
Don't feel bad about having alone time though. Sometimes having space from other is healthy in doses. So, no need to feel lonely. Enjoy your me time when you get it. Just don't get too much of it.
I won't fall back into my boy habits, I'm just not used to having a night all to myself anymore! Between now and the 21st, the only night I don't have plans yet is the 14th. And we'll see how long that lasts :)