General Discussions => General discussions => ARGHHH! => Topic started by: suzifrommd on September 25, 2013, 12:13:34 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: suzifrommd on September 25, 2013, 12:13:34 PM
Post by: suzifrommd on September 25, 2013, 12:13:34 PM
I went to SSA during my lunch period to update the gender and the name on my social security card. I had been gathering documents for weeks, including waiting most of a month to get a letter from my doctor. Before I went, I reread all the instructions to make sure I didn't miss something. I used to be a software engineer, so I'm really good at reading specifications.
The highlights of my visit there:
* The letter from my doctor has to have his medical license number and the place where his medical license was issued. (These requirements were NOT listed on the social security website).
* They won't accept my legal name change because the seal is not embossed. I need to go to the courthouse and beg them to emboss it for me (don't even know if they do that). This requirement was also not on their site.
* They needed to "research the policy" to determine whether I was eligible for a gender change, since I hadn't had surgery. She wouldn't believe me when I said surgery was not required.
I didn't accept this last one. I was led back into the cubicle farm to speak with "the supervisor".
He spent 40 minutes in my presence, poring over policy document. At one point he informed me that I hadn't "completed my treatment" for gender change. I asked what that meant and he proceeded to tell me how I had to calm down, and that he expected respect from both his employees and the public (I hadn't said anything disrespectful, other than ask him a clarifying question).
I asked him again, what I had to do to "complete treatment." Once again he told me I needed to calm down. He started explaining to me all the requirements one more time.
After listening to the lengthy explanation, I asked him STILL ANOTHER TIME what I needed to do to complete treatment. He said, "Oh, forget about that".
He then proceeded to ask my about my surgical status. I told him he can't ask me that. He said, oh yes he could, but I could refuse to answer (which I did).
In the end they sent me away without making either the name or the gender change.
I can't get my driver's license changed or my name in my employer's payroll records without a change to my Social Security records, so the entire process of changing my id is on hold. I have no confidence that after gathering all this stuff (including hounding my doctor for another month to get a letter with all the necessary documentation) won't produce the same result with some other, equally obscure requirements not adhered to.
The highlights of my visit there:
* The letter from my doctor has to have his medical license number and the place where his medical license was issued. (These requirements were NOT listed on the social security website).
* They won't accept my legal name change because the seal is not embossed. I need to go to the courthouse and beg them to emboss it for me (don't even know if they do that). This requirement was also not on their site.
* They needed to "research the policy" to determine whether I was eligible for a gender change, since I hadn't had surgery. She wouldn't believe me when I said surgery was not required.
I didn't accept this last one. I was led back into the cubicle farm to speak with "the supervisor".
He spent 40 minutes in my presence, poring over policy document. At one point he informed me that I hadn't "completed my treatment" for gender change. I asked what that meant and he proceeded to tell me how I had to calm down, and that he expected respect from both his employees and the public (I hadn't said anything disrespectful, other than ask him a clarifying question).
I asked him again, what I had to do to "complete treatment." Once again he told me I needed to calm down. He started explaining to me all the requirements one more time.
After listening to the lengthy explanation, I asked him STILL ANOTHER TIME what I needed to do to complete treatment. He said, "Oh, forget about that".
He then proceeded to ask my about my surgical status. I told him he can't ask me that. He said, oh yes he could, but I could refuse to answer (which I did).
In the end they sent me away without making either the name or the gender change.
I can't get my driver's license changed or my name in my employer's payroll records without a change to my Social Security records, so the entire process of changing my id is on hold. I have no confidence that after gathering all this stuff (including hounding my doctor for another month to get a letter with all the necessary documentation) won't produce the same result with some other, equally obscure requirements not adhered to.
Title: Re: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: Devlyn on September 25, 2013, 12:23:29 PM
Post by: Devlyn on September 25, 2013, 12:23:29 PM
Big hug! Here's what we have in the Wiki: http://susans.org/wiki/Changing_Social_Security_records
Hugs, Devlyn
Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: mrs izzy on September 25, 2013, 01:34:15 PM
Post by: mrs izzy on September 25, 2013, 01:34:15 PM
You must already have this but if you do not maybe can help. I know all about red tape. I am even Post and having trouble with things. Seems the ability to place logic in thigs has went the way of the past.
https://secure.ssa.gov/poms.nsf/lnx/0110212200
Izzy
https://secure.ssa.gov/poms.nsf/lnx/0110212200
Izzy
Title: Re: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: Jaelithe on September 25, 2013, 02:37:54 PM
Post by: Jaelithe on September 25, 2013, 02:37:54 PM
Oh good lord, did you get your name and gender changed on any other identification first? I know a trans man in the area and, it's been a while but I think, he set up his other ID before going to social security. The drivers license and such, I'd ask but these days he's been deep stealth for a long time, it's one of those things we just don't talk about(which is going to be somewhat interesting when he finds out about me, but that's another story)
Title: Re: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: suzifrommd on September 30, 2013, 11:02:35 AM
Post by: suzifrommd on September 30, 2013, 11:02:35 AM
A follow-up:
I decided to punt on the gender change for now because it involves chasing down my doctor for another letter.
I went back today to change my name (after getting the appropriate paperwork from the county) and it couldn't have gone more smoothly.
Next step: Department of Motor Vehicles on Saturday.
I decided to punt on the gender change for now because it involves chasing down my doctor for another letter.
I went back today to change my name (after getting the appropriate paperwork from the county) and it couldn't have gone more smoothly.
Next step: Department of Motor Vehicles on Saturday.
Title: Re: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: Devlyn on September 30, 2013, 11:49:25 AM
Post by: Devlyn on September 30, 2013, 11:49:25 AM
Yay for progress! Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: Ms. OBrien CVT on September 30, 2013, 12:16:15 PM
Post by: Ms. OBrien CVT on September 30, 2013, 12:16:15 PM
Awesome news, Suzi. When I changed my gender, I had a letter from my surgeon (after my orchidectomy) that stated I had irreversible gender surgery. It when smooth from there.
Title: Re: Humiliation and red tape
Post by: suzifrommd on September 30, 2013, 12:23:20 PM
Post by: suzifrommd on September 30, 2013, 12:23:20 PM
Quote from: Ms. OBrien CVT on September 30, 2013, 12:16:15 PM
Awesome news, Suzi. When I changed my gender, I had a letter from my surgeon (after my orchidectomy) that stated I had irreversible gender surgery. It when smooth from there.
Yeah, I might wait until after my (planned) SRS.