Susan's Place Transgender Resources

As I'm sure many of us can relate to, being on HRT but not ready to go full time is a waiting game with more than a few seemingly endless bumpy roads! Wondering what people have used as way to smooth over the wait until going full time?

I like to regender myself in my head, when people refer to he, him, his, Mr or my male name I just imagine they said her, she, hers, Ms or Grace. It makes such a difference! When typing out my male name or work email I substitute Grace in my mind. Hopefully that will ease the final six or so months.

Anybody got any tricks they use?

thanks

Your mileage may vary, but here are some of the things that I do:

I try to change clothing when I get home... At the suggestion of my fiancee, I've moved my "male" clothes into the hall closet and just pull a pair of slacks and a shirt and tie the night before work.  That way when I come home I can just walk into my closet and see nothing but my female wardrobe... odd, but it helps.

I also carry a purse to work- I leave it in the car, but loading the purse at night with keys, wallet, etc, makes certain they are all in one place for me, and helps me feel better going out the door with my purse... and I wear it from the car to the house.  Makes me feel like I'm making progress on keeping track of the contents of the purse, etc.

I also go out at least a couple nights a week, even if it's only to the store, dressed properly, working on passing as much as possible.

I do my voice on the way back and forth from work in the car, too.  At the moment, I'm waiting on my contract to end with the current company (and for me to secure a new job, hopefully work-from-home, but at least trans-friendly).  Fortunately I write software, so there is  a reasonable hope I can find a job meeting those requirements.

And then, of course, there's my all-me facebook page, pinterest, and, well, Susan's... I've noticed lately that my internal voice shifts to female most times while I'm on the internet; it's the only place where I am *totally* out as a woman.

*hug*  Please feel free to PM if you have any questions!

Those are cool suggestions... I've been meaning to divide my wardrobe for a while now, time to get serious! And yes, Susan's has been tremendous as a coping mechanism - to be able to present as Grace and not be judged, called she and included with the ladies is a massive pick me up!

thanks for all the tips. I need to just trash all the male baggage on move on.

The misgendering in between stage, my mind just kept saying, just wait, you will get yours.

I listen to music to help cope. My favorites to really turn up and zone out to till the anxiety of waiting passes are She's Country and Dirt Road Anthem by Jason Aldean.

Hi lovely Grace

I am finding that as the weeks go my mind is changing due to the effects of wonderful E. This is very unexpected and difficult to put in words but wow.
As you say HRT makes coping with presenting male more difficult than ever but knowing the path ahead is clearer than it has ever been for me. I finally have some clarity in my future.

I am taking time to enjoy the subtle, but definite changes that E has done so far and look forward to the next ones. Some visible and some only to me but each one makes me tremendously happy to be washing my male away for good.
I spend most of my time at home as I should be, not having to present a façade to others and it feels so wonderfully refreshing not to be in male drag.
I also went through some old clothes and threw them out as I will never be wearing them again. Felt good.

I know I still have a long way to go before full time but together make it so much easier than doing this alone without the help of people here.

Jen

Well I started while still in 'male' mode by having my nails dome, wearing leggings and tunic tops and nobody seemed perturbed. I had my ears pierced months before anyhow and wore more feminine ear rings. Then started with some foundation, Oil of Olay with SPF foundation.

No one made any comments for months.

Quote from: kariann330 on November 08, 2013, 11:03:44 PM
I listen to music to help cope. My favorites to really turn up and zone out to till the anxiety of waiting passes are She's Country and Dirt Road Anthem by Jason Aldean.

Quote from: Jenny07 on November 08, 2013, 11:12:21 PM
I am taking time to enjoy the subtle, but definite changes that E has done so far and look forward to the next ones. Some visible and some only to me but each one makes me tremendously happy to be washing my male away for good.

Y'know, taking those two ideas together made me think of this...!  :icon_mrgreen:

Quote from: Cindy on November 08, 2013, 11:36:33 PM
Well I started while still in 'male' mode by having my nails dome, wearing leggings and tunic tops and nobody seemed perturbed. I had my ears pierced months before anyhow and wore more feminine ear rings. Then started with some foundation, Oil of Olay with SPF foundation.

No one made any comments for months.

ah yes, the old "gradually change everything right under their noses" trick! I'm getting my ears (re)pierced in January as my six months on HRT present.

That takes me back to grade school and the music teacher, Ms. Worchel.

Quote from: LordKAT on November 09, 2013, 02:42:11 AM
That takes me back to grade school and the music teacher, Ms. Worchel.

You can't leave it there!!

She was cool in that she taught songs that were not just kid songs but actually from radio and tv shows. Zager Evans, In the year 2525 among many others. She talked us into making up a routine to dance to Wash that man right out of my hair for a talent show. It ended up be a skit of its own and was quite fun. We didn't win but it seemed the best to me.

I first started to like Opera and musicals and more classical music because of her. I wonder what ever happened to her.

Cute.

Zager Evens was the classic one hit wonder Mmm new thread

Whoops sorry for hijacking

No matter... I just posted a one hit wonder to your thread, sorry if it implodes!  ;D

Actually, I remembered another pre-full time transition coping tactic I like to use... I think of myself as a woman trying to pass as a man. When I'm out in public "en homme" I just switch it around... I'm not a "man" wishing I was a woman, but a woman pretending to be a "man", trying (sometimes not too hard) not to let my cover be blown! Since I know in my heart that I am a woman anyway it makes being pre full time and having to dress and act like a guy a lot more fun and bearable!

Unique idea Grace. Why not make it fun if you can.

I cope by working, a lot. And by taking things one goal at a time. Which also means my checklist is about a mile long.

At least you get to check things off.

I cope by taking progressive baby steps getting ready for the bigger ones when I'm ready. nails, hair, eyebrow, plucking , bra nice sweaters

That's exactly what I fear! When people see me are they going to greet me properly or not. Like today I went into a Circle K to get a soda and the clerk said, "Will there be anything else sir?" Now that was all right because I was in guy mode. But when I'm full time, I just hope that she looks at the rest of my body and not just my face when she looks at me.