Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I  need to just rant/vent/let all this hurt out. Yesterday I was on the footpath with my girlfriend and our friend, waiting for a bus. I had binded my chest, had my packer in, looked really passable. We were waiting for the bus when this car comes up behind us, then it slows down and stops beside us. "Oh! It's a girl!" they yell at me, cackling loudly with laughter, then sped off down the street before I could say anything. This is the first transphobic occurance I have had. It's upset me greatly, but I think that it is mostly because I have never encountered this before. How do you all deal/cope with transphobic bullying? Because I can't stop feeling so horrible and upset about this

That's really horrible. :(
Sadly there's not a lot we can do about random jerks, especially when they're douche bag cowards who delight in verbally abusing and harassing others. Whilst I'm not normally one to advocate retaliatory action, I hope you got down their licence plate number so that if you ever see it parked on the side of the road... well...  >:-)
Feel better soon.  :)

I learned how to deal with bullying by becoming a bully. It probably wasn't the nicest thing to do, but by the time I was 16 people had stopped messing with me. I never experienced transphobic bullying (I've been outed, stared at, and snickered about, but I wouldn't consider that bullying) but I imagine the best way to deal with it starts with you yourself. You have to learn to just deal with the fact that some people are mean for absolutely no reason and everyone faces harassment in some way, shape, or form. Personally, I try to treat my situation like it's not unique. If someone laughed at you for a bad haircut, what would your reaction be? Most people would laugh about how stupid of a thing that is to make fun of because hey whatever your bad haircut isnt anyone elses problem and theres other people out there with bad haircuts too. Do you see what I' getting at?

People are dumbasses, man. You just roll with the punches. The best way to deal with a bully is to ignore them and make them feel as irrelevant as they really are.

I see where you're coming from Tim. I will just try and not get too upset. It was the first time this happened, so I was really shocked. Thanks both <3

Quote from: mynameisjacob on November 08, 2013, 09:20:13 PM
How do you all deal/cope with transphobic bullying?

Well, all I've gotten have been nasty stares.

When that happens, I hold my head high and show them the face of transgender: Intelligent, competent, and proud.

Quote from: mynameisjacob on November 09, 2013, 05:46:06 PM
I see where you're coming from Tim. I will just try and not get too upset. It was the first time this happened, so I was really shocked. Thanks both <3

For sure, the first time is always pretty hard on you. People like that serve no purpose in your life and there's no reason to stress yourself out over their comments :)

Yes, sadly there's not much you can do about that kind of random verbal abuse from strangers on the street, and yelling abuse back could be a ticket to being bashed. That said however, I think I remember you saying you were in Melbourne, Australia? Don't forget we have some pretty good anti discrimination and anti bullying laws which you can use to your benefit of you encounter that kind of harassment in the workplace or from shop assistants, land lords, etc. There's no need to tolerate bullying in those circumstances.

"How do you all deal/cope with transphobic bullying?"

It's simple, you pity them.

The comments in your case, they were made from people with small minds, and likely lame educations. They are to be pitied. I can't picture how it must feel like to go through life and be so clearly useless. But they sure have no value.

Verbal attacks like that, they scream out how pathetic they are.

I am not saying ignore them, I am saying feel sorry for them. Nothing bothers a bully more, than to be pitied.

They only succeed, if you actually believe them eh.

Thanks everyone for being so kind :)
I'm feeling better about myself now!

i've made a post in the spirituality section under buddhism namely 'dealing with insults thrown in your face' which is a story i learnt as a child. i don't know how much it'd help you but sparing some time to read it won't go waste. i feel sorry for you. but if noone else was around expect for your friends who know your status, i guess you could ignore it and forget that something like that ever happened!

Yes, I remember reading that post. Very helpful insight it was too.

I am not religious or spiriual but I do find both to be facinating. Will check out the post, thankyou