Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hello,

       I'm going in to have srs in TEN DAYS! Needless to say I'm full of excitement and questions (questions I will be 100% sure to ask during the pre-op appointment). One major concern thats been bugging me is not post op depth, most girls seem to report that depth isnt too terrible of a problem. I'm very concerned about width. The soul source dialators my surgeon provides only go up to 5' circumference....after taking a tape measure to my partner, Ive come to learn he is 5.5' circumference. I very much want to go into the surgery with realistic expectations, but I'm hoping there is something I can do. Is 5' circumference really the maximum I can expect? do any of you girls have more than that? will I need a skin graft if i hope to get that kind of size? As far as skin goes "down there" I have plenty of it, which has always been distressing for tucking, but is a good thing for surgery.


       Any words of wisdom would be great!

Yes, Brassard says it's possible to gain width simply by using larger dilators, as it's mostly a matter of stretching the PC muscle. I would imagine the limitation is actually the size of the opening in your pelvis.

However, you clearly would still need a larger dilator if you wanted to get up to his size before having sex with him. I will note, though, that the step up in circumference between the orange Soul Source dilator (4.7" circumference) and his 5.5" is approximately the same as the steps between dilators (for example, 1" to 1.25" is about 0.8" change in circumference), and most of us manage to do that with some discomfort and gentle stretching the first few times we go up a size. In other words, you probably *can* accommodate him just fine as long as he's patient and careful at first. Also, as Cherrie says, a penis is different - no matter how hard they are, it's not going to be as unforgiving as solid plastic. So a penis isn't actually going to stretch a vagina quite as much as its circumference would indicate, whereas the dilator does.

Your dilation habits can widen the entrance ring.  When it is in to depth, moving it side to side and up and down will give you some stretching at the entrance where your problem will be. Follow your surgeon's advice on how active you can be, but for me it was a matter of do what feels good and experiment gently.   This is not a matter of a precision hole drilled in concrete, wood, or steel.  Its a hole in a piece of foam rubber by comparision which can be stretched like the neck of a balloon to expand. The skin in your vagina has elasticity, especially if it is a scrotal skin flap or graft since that it the nature of the tissue.

Also, the measurement of your BF with a measuring tape is going to be in a condition that may never happen to him while he is penetrating you, and while he will not become Slim Sodastraw, neither will he be the trunk of the General Grant Tree (giant sequoia).  The two of you will hit pain about the same time if he expands beyond your capacity, and you may remeber that pain kills an erection pretty fast.

My boyfriend is bigger than the orange soulsource dilator and I have and I have no problem taking him full depth.  I wouldnt worry to much. As others have said plastic is not the same a a penis and while it may hurt at first you shouldnt have any issues later

Thanks girls! I had a feeling it would be most likely be okay, I'm just a bit of a worry-wart. I really appreciate the responses though, just nice to hear from women who have gone through what I'm about to. :)

yeah i have to agree with everyone else. if you can handle the orange you should be good unless your with a dinosaur

Quote from: Tristan on November 12, 2013, 10:58:16 PM
yeah i have to agree with everyone else. if you can handle the orange you should be good unless your with a dinosaur

now what orange are we talking aboutand how many inches (length) is this orange 1 and  did your doctor provide it? which doctor can i see a pic of it lol  .. im having my surgery as well in March 

Thank you

Jessica

Don't forget that good sex counts as dilating too :) Plus you will be getting the bigger "organic" dilator.

Part of your post-op life you may have to adjust is your dilating frequency. You may find you need to dilate more often. Give it time and you will figure out what works and makes you feel comfortable.

Quote from: JessicaNYCgirl on November 15, 2013, 04:24:13 AM
now what orange are we talking aboutand how many inches (length) is this orange 1 and  did your doctor provide it? which doctor can i see a pic of it lol  .. im having my surgery as well in March 

Thank you

Jessica

Look up Soul Source who makes the ones used by most North American surgeons.  Links to them are in several posts here.  They have four sizes for neo-vaginas from and your surgeon will provide you with a set onf them.  All of them are 9 inches long, but they have depth markers up to 7 inches.  The orange one is 1.5 inches in diameter or a bit under 5 inches in circumference.

My boyfriend is a good bit wider than the orange dilator (which is all I'm using these days), and although I did have some discomfort in the beginning, all is good now.  In fact, the last time we had intercourse, he slid into me very easily, with no guidance, it was incredible!  I find I'm much tighter if I'm on all fours vs. the "missionary" position, so you can experiment with different positions as well.  Don't assume you'll be an expert at first, there's a definite learning curve - sex as a woman is very different from sex as a male-bodied creature.  Take your time and be gentle with yourself, you'll do fine.

Quote from: Colleen Ireland on November 15, 2013, 08:26:50 PM
My boyfriend is a good bit wider than the orange dilator (which is all I'm using these days), and although I did have some discomfort in the beginning, all is good now.  In fact, the last time we had intercourse, he slid into me very easily, with no guidance, it was incredible!  I find I'm much tighter if I'm on all fours vs. the "missionary" position, so you can experiment with different positions as well.  Don't assume you'll be an expert at first, there's a definite learning curve - sex as a woman is very different from sex as a male-bodied creature.  Take your time and be gentle with yourself, you'll do fine.

Colleen giggity giggity as Quagmire would say. i couldn't have put it any better myself

Maya: I worry about this.  I asked my original surgeon recently if I could try a larger dilator (diameterwise) than the current largest one.  I was convinced it'd not be possible, thinking I'd only been ''stretched'' to the current dimensions.  Yet he says, despite pain to some extent, I should be able to increase my width by using a bigger dilator.  It won't be easy, he says.  I still haven't tried but it certainly seems encouraging.  Surely a surgeon would be fairly knowledgeable too.   So I don't think you should worry about this so  much.  I hope you can see what I'm saying.  I wish you all the best in your surgery and send my best healing wishes  :angel: