Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi girls! P.e has been the most awful class in my life for a long time. The boys are expected to lift a lot of heavy weights while the girls just kind of walk the track. I should be walking or running the track. I despise lIfting weights because I dont want to have to gain any more muscle mass thn I have to. Ugh plus the changing in the locker room is awful. In conclusion I am failing p.e and I have no idea what to do. Anyone else
else feel this way or did feel this way?

Yes!

My p.e. days were a long time ago (the '70's LOL) but the feelings were the same...hated the showers (we had "open bay" showers then) the ridicule by the teachers and some of the students, that we were "pansies", "pussies", "girlie-men"... (there was more than one boy who didn't want p.e.)

Even today I get flashbacks if I go into a gym, which sucked because my kids had several concerts etc that I went to.

I can't recommend how I handled it at the time, but I asked to be excused from it, they laughed, so I just stopped going. This started a pattern of skipping more classes, and eventually I dropped out.

Currently, I make more money than the average person with a 4 year college degree, so it's not the end of the world. (At least, not in the US)

If they aren't forcing you to lift heavy weights, just keep it light.
I used to just use the leg press. I had no interest in upper body strength.

High school was bad for me, especially the locker room changing with all the other girls, all stages of development.  I wanted a chest like the guys not having two mounds there.  In college I have been able to get my needed PE credits by taking course that don't require changing or showering on campus.  I can change in my apartment as no one that I know of changes for these courses in the school locker room.

Aside from some awesome HS PE classes in Target Sports (Archery, Fencing, etc) and Racquet Sports (Ping Pong!!!!) I have fully repressed the class and have (less than) no desire to bring it back to the fore. Jr. high was even worse.

I'll just stick with trying to remember the regular schoolday interactions :(

Being gay in the 70's was a tuff time to be in High School, but fortunately for me I had lots of girl friends and they in turn dated the jocks so when they were hateful they didn't treat there BF's good so P.E. was tolerable, besides being gay and staring at a guys bod wasn't all that bad ;-)

PE has always been hard.  I was a year younger than all the others in class, small for my age too.  Worse yet, in the wrong class (men's gym instead of women's gym).  Always a low point in the day.

Lucky for me, I was already in denial by the end of school, so I made a specific point to teach a lesson to all soccer and basketball players (I hated the game and I hated that I still had to participate even though I was always picked last as the most useless, lol) - I was a good soccer goalkeeper though :P. So, I just bested them all in pullups, pushups and other power exercises (still dealing with some of my bulk left).
Locker room... Oh my... I hated that instinctively and I always just stuck somewhere in the corner, changing quickly and running away. I remember that guys mocked me a couple of times that I never ever showered with them afterwards and never dropped my underpants either, but I just hated to see them running around naked and did not want to see my... Take care and be safe - it is going to end sometime!

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on November 14, 2013, 11:38:48 AM
Lucky for me, I was already in denial by the end of school, so I made a specific point to teach a lesson to all soccer and basketball players (I hated the game and I hated that I still had to paticipate even though I was always picked last as the most useless, lol) - I was a good soccer goalkeeper though :P. So, I just bested them all in pullups, pushups and other power exercises (still dealing with some of my bulk left).
Locker room... Oh my... I hated that instinctively and I always just stuck somewhere in the corner, changing quickly and running away. I remember that guys mocked me a couple of times that I never ever showered with them afterwards and never dropped my underpants either, but I just hated to see them running around naked and did not want to see my... Take care and be safe - it is going to end sometime!

aww... now you're making me remember things. Hiding my body in the locker rooms (heck... still did that a year or two ago when I tried the work gym)... refusing to use the showers... getting picked last for any team...

LOL. I don't really mind. Memory is empowering...

I'm actually quite big and strong as a male. Even though I hate it I might lift something heavy to show them I'm strong (which is more then them) and then they'd quit calling me nameS

Quote from: Henrietta48 on November 14, 2013, 11:59:43 AM
I'm actually quite big and strong as a male. Even though I hate it I might lift something heavy to show them I'm strong (which is more then them) and then they'd quit calling me nameS

I switched schools quite often (jr high/middle schools, mainly) and what I found was that the boys want to see how you fight (or perhaps, that one will fight).

The first several schools I did fight...and they stopped with the teasing/bullying after that (even though I lost the fights, LOL) but the last couple I just refused to, knowing that would piss them off, but I was tired of playing their games.

So yeah, if it's an issue with acceptance by your peers...lift occasionally, to show that you can, but you don't have to put your heart into it and get muscles.

Quote from: Henrietta48 on November 14, 2013, 11:59:43 AM
I'm actually quite big and strong as a male. Even though I hate it I might lift something heavy to show them I'm strong (which is more then them) and then they'd quit calling me nameS

Dont bother - they will hate You anyway - even if You will kick some butts :). You do not fit in and they sense that, I dunno how, but they do.

Quote from: kabit on November 14, 2013, 11:42:50 AM
aww... now you're making me remember things. Hiding my body in the locker rooms (heck... still did that a year or two ago when I tried the work gym)... refusing to use the showers... getting picked last for any team...

LOL. I don't really mind. Memory is empowering...

Touché! A couple of years ago I frequented public swimming pool and although I saw all those guys running around between showers and sauna naked, as well as sitting naked in sauna, I always had a towel around my hips (wanting to have it around my chest though...), feeling uneasy if somebody close to me was changing - I cant believe I used to be stupid and ignorant to all those subconscious clues :P.

I absolutly detested P.E. especially in middle school. One kid while in the locker room changing walked up to me pointed at my chest and said "Your a girl, no boys have nipples like that." And while he was right it still hurt when the other kids laughed. 

Ah yes, the old "getting picked last" gambit...

Or when the last 2-3 were picked, and then the bargaining starts..."Hey I'll trade these two losers and a moderate player, for one of your good ones..."  :(

Or when all the good players were chosen, and the teams just ran out on the field...leaving behind a small number of "no-good players"...who then tried to sneak off to the monkey bars or a hidden corner of the field, but the teacher says to go out and just start playing with everyone else...upon which the team "captains" would say, "HEY! You're not on *my* team...get over there..!" So you'd move over to the other team, and the second capt would say the same thing...and the teacher is watching, so one just tried to stay out of the way of the kids, and out of the view of the teacher...invisibility is a learned skill.

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on November 14, 2013, 12:10:40 PM
Touché! A couple of years ago I frequented public swimming pool and although I saw all those guys running around between showers and sauna naked, as well as sitting naked in sauna, I always had a towel around my hips (wanting to have it around my chest though...), feeling uneasy if somebody close to me was changing - I cant believe I used to be stupid and ignorant to all those subconscious clues :P.

I hear that! There were tons of clues... plus, I knew once :(
Whatever. Time to move forward. The past is good to understand who you are and where you came from, but it's the path we take now that matters ♥

I hated it,I scored a single try at rugby the high spot of my 5 years at a grammar school.I was the last kid to be picked and was allowed to bowl under arm at cricket.

I got good at being silent. I used to live in a apartment so I learned to step very lightly so the people downstairs didn't get mad

Quote from: Beth Andrea on November 14, 2013, 12:42:10 PM
Ah yes, the old "getting picked last" gambit...

Or when the last 2-3 were picked, and then the bargaining starts..."Hey I'll trade these two losers and a moderate player, for one of your good ones..."  :(

Or when all the good players were chosen, and the teams just ran out on the field...leaving behind a small number of "no-good players"...who then tried to sneak off to the monkey bars or a hidden corner of the field, but the teacher says to go out and just start playing with everyone else...upon which the team "captains" would say, "HEY! You're not on *my* team...get over there..!" So you'd move over to the other team, and the second capt would say the same thing...and the teacher is watching, so one just tried to stay out of the way of the kids, and out of the view of the teacher...invisibility is a learned skill.

I was never good at being silent ;) - always sticking out and not fitting in :). But I learned another lesson - they cant hurt You if You are not there. And if You are running really really fast, they never gonna catch You! Not being in the same place where You were a second ago... is another type of invisibility.

Oh kay... I just re-read this whole thread. Seriously, why the hell did we/still do have to go through all of this sh..t? Like, it was not enough to be deeply troubled inside, there is also a whole bunch of cruel teenage buggers who just need someone to pick on??? Kids are supposed to enjoy their lives, not spend a lot of schooltime just practicing daily survival ordeals... :(

I find it disturbing that some schools are still separating activities for boys and girls.  I haven't been in school in almost a decade and there was none of that in my school, except for the extra curricular teams.

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on November 14, 2013, 02:34:41 PM
I was never good at being silent ;) - always sticking out and not fitting in :). But I learned another lesson - they cant hurt You if You are not there. And if You are running really really fast, they never gonna catch You! Not being in the same place where You were a second ago... is another type of invisibility.

Oh kay... I just re-read this whole thread. Seriously, why the hell did we/still do have to go through all of this sh..t? Like, it was not enough to be deeply troubled inside, there is also a whole bunch of cruel teenage buggers who just need someone to pick on??? Kids are supposed to enjoy their lives, not spend a lot of schooltime just practicing daily survival ordeals... :(

The world is changing... slowly, slowly, slowly. Try not to hate it or feel too much pain from it (god knows we do)... just do what you can to help change it for the better!

QuoteSeriously, why the hell did we/still do have to go through all of this sh..t?

I don't think the problem was PE itself (being fit is preferable to being a couch potato, esp for kids), but the psychological nonsense...jeez!

If the jocks and cheerleader types actually realized their importance for MOTIVATING and ENCOURAGING all students, not just the "beautiful people", that would be a huge step forward...

But the coaches/teachers in my era (not so much now, I don't think) were big on the tough brutal love...

I don't know...  :(

Quote from: Henrietta48 on November 14, 2013, 09:19:56 AM
Hi girls! P.e has been the most awful class in my life for a long time. The boys are expected to lift a lot of heavy weights while the girls just kind of walk the track. I should be walking or running the track. I despise lIfting weights because I dont want to have to gain any more muscle mass thn I have to. Ugh plus the changing in the locker room is awful. In conclusion I am failing p.e and I have no idea what to do. Anyone else
else feel this way or did feel this way?

tell your gym teacher your training for track so you can get out of weights. i have seen that one work before. or you could always go with the old ," i dont life weights because im accident prone and dont want to gain any muscle. you can call my mother about it if you like?" but you have to say mother not father. both of these tent to work. you can also order a fake doctors note off line to back it up  ;)