Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: Felice Aislin on November 20, 2013, 03:27:44 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Advice Soon Please! Transitioning in old OR new job
Post by: Felice Aislin on November 20, 2013, 03:27:44 PM
Post by: Felice Aislin on November 20, 2013, 03:27:44 PM
My spouse is at the very initial stages of transition, but is ready to move forward as quickly as circumstances will allow. We now have to make a decision about a job offer in the next day or so.
Would you think someone is likely to have more success transitioning at a place where they have a long history and excellent reviews, but is not necessarily a place with the most liberal and accepting of views (think Catholic health institution), OR transitioning at a *new* job where "gender identity" is included in their non-discrimination policy, but would be working with children and public opinion can be a big deal. The new co-workers would first meet my spouse in their assigned birth gender (looking as androgynous as possible), but soon after the 45 day new-hire probationary period is up, my spouse would seek to transition. We thought about talking to H.R. before accepting the job, about starting on day one in their correct gender...but others have advised against this, until the probationary period is passed. One of the managers at the new job is best friends with one of the managers at the current job, so we are afraid of information spreading at the wrong time, and ending up with no job if we let them know too soon.
Which do you think would be the most likely option to work out? Any tips or thought are much appreciated!
Would you think someone is likely to have more success transitioning at a place where they have a long history and excellent reviews, but is not necessarily a place with the most liberal and accepting of views (think Catholic health institution), OR transitioning at a *new* job where "gender identity" is included in their non-discrimination policy, but would be working with children and public opinion can be a big deal. The new co-workers would first meet my spouse in their assigned birth gender (looking as androgynous as possible), but soon after the 45 day new-hire probationary period is up, my spouse would seek to transition. We thought about talking to H.R. before accepting the job, about starting on day one in their correct gender...but others have advised against this, until the probationary period is passed. One of the managers at the new job is best friends with one of the managers at the current job, so we are afraid of information spreading at the wrong time, and ending up with no job if we let them know too soon.
Which do you think would be the most likely option to work out? Any tips or thought are much appreciated!
Title: Re: Advice Soon Please! Transitioning in old OR new job
Post by: JLT1 on November 20, 2013, 10:14:09 PM
Post by: JLT1 on November 20, 2013, 10:14:09 PM
Felice,
I have no idea.
For me, I decided to stay in my current job. My worse case scenario: I figure I can transition and by the time they figure out how to fire me, I'll be transitioned and then I can get a new job as a woman.
Good luck,
Hugs,
Jen
I have no idea.
For me, I decided to stay in my current job. My worse case scenario: I figure I can transition and by the time they figure out how to fire me, I'll be transitioned and then I can get a new job as a woman.
Good luck,
Hugs,
Jen
Title: Re: Advice Soon Please! Transitioning in old OR new job
Post by: Ms Grace on November 20, 2013, 10:35:19 PM
Post by: Ms Grace on November 20, 2013, 10:35:19 PM
It's a bit of a minefield. Some Catholic organisations tend to fire gay and trans* people without a thought. So you probably find out if that will be a problem there before making any decision on the second job. Good luck!
Title: Re: Advice Soon Please! Transitioning in old OR new job
Post by: KelsieJ on November 20, 2013, 11:18:23 PM
Post by: KelsieJ on November 20, 2013, 11:18:23 PM
I would say it should depend on what inclusions they have in their HR directives where she is currently.
If there are no protections, I'd look somewhere there is, try and get a job there and then transition.
HTH Kelsie
If there are no protections, I'd look somewhere there is, try and get a job there and then transition.
HTH Kelsie
Title: Re: Advice Soon Please! Transitioning in old OR new job
Post by: Felice Aislin on November 22, 2013, 12:26:01 AM
Post by: Felice Aislin on November 22, 2013, 12:26:01 AM
Thank you for your thoughts!
Apparently, there IS included in the current work place's harassment policy language protecting both orientation AND gender identity! My spouse discovered this a couple days ago, but I thought she was talking about the new job. She just corrected me, it is the current place that explicitly states this. And apparently there are lesbian and gay employees at the current work place.
I am starting to think she might actually have a chance not getting fired at her current job. The long track record of excellent reviews will make them more cautious about firing her, considering the laws in both our city and state protecting against discrimination for gender identity.
The new place could easily claim it was for other reasons that she "didn't work out." There are reviews online from employees at the new place claiming/accusing a co-worker for being fired in an underhanded manner because she was lesbian. Numerous reviews complained about being treated poorly (even unethically) by management, and H.R. not having employees backs. Some things would indicate they would be more open-minded, being a secular institution in a liberal city, but other things make us question that.
Starting to lean towards sticking it out here for now.
Apparently, there IS included in the current work place's harassment policy language protecting both orientation AND gender identity! My spouse discovered this a couple days ago, but I thought she was talking about the new job. She just corrected me, it is the current place that explicitly states this. And apparently there are lesbian and gay employees at the current work place.
I am starting to think she might actually have a chance not getting fired at her current job. The long track record of excellent reviews will make them more cautious about firing her, considering the laws in both our city and state protecting against discrimination for gender identity.
The new place could easily claim it was for other reasons that she "didn't work out." There are reviews online from employees at the new place claiming/accusing a co-worker for being fired in an underhanded manner because she was lesbian. Numerous reviews complained about being treated poorly (even unethically) by management, and H.R. not having employees backs. Some things would indicate they would be more open-minded, being a secular institution in a liberal city, but other things make us question that.
Starting to lean towards sticking it out here for now.
Title: Re: Advice Soon Please! Transitioning in old OR new job
Post by: Missy~rmdlm on November 22, 2013, 12:29:57 AM
Post by: Missy~rmdlm on November 22, 2013, 12:29:57 AM
Quote from: Ms Grace on November 20, 2013, 10:35:19 PM
It's a bit of a minefield. Some Catholic organisations tend to fire gay and trans* people without a thought. So you probably find out if that will be a problem there before making any decision on the second job. Good luck!
True but I'll be applying at a Catholic hospital in the future nonetheless. In post transition I doubt it'll ever be an issue.