Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Its been a year since I went full time, and 9 months hrt. As I become happier and more beautiful as the woman I've always been, I notice my family becoming more uncomfortable. I don't think they knew it was possible for someone to change the way I have. I hadn't seen them since July and just recently Skyped.

They weren't making eye contact with me. They were nervous too. It felt good actually. They can see how happy I've become. They can't say sh*t. I'm sure they'll never actually come out and say they're happy for me. Or say they're glad I didn't kill myself last year. Or use my female name ( my mom is though).

Its all unspoken in my family. If they're uncomfortable about something they simply pretend it doesn't exist. I find it amusing that they can't get away with ignoring me any more. I feel like I'm in control now. Lol.

I had hoped you were going to say they were becoming more supportive with time. You'd think that would be the natural response wouldn't you? I kind of expect the same "head in the sand" treatment from my family. Oh well! Good luck with yours!  :)

congratulations on your year I'm slowly trying to muster the courage

*hug*

You are probably right.  Especially if you are not in their physical presence much, they probably still think of you as your bio gender, remember you, etc.  When you see them face to face, that's when it will likely all come rushing back again.

Has there ever been a dear friend in your childhood that you didn't see for some time, and suddenly when you saw them again they had changed dramatically?  I imagine it would feel like that, to me, seeing one of my daughters transition "all at once".  I'm out to my mother, who is supportive and loving, but I've been wrestling with this, too, since she is at least 16 hours' drive away.  To her, I'm still her son, when she thinks of me she probably thinks of me the way I look in the most recent picture, viewed through the lens of her perspective of the way I grew up.  I know that it will be hard for her, when I transition fully, if I don't keep her in the loop gradually through pictures during HRT. 

I still get wistful and sad when I see how tall my grandson has grown between visits...

*hug*

I think it will probably take time and many visits for them to accept the new you and begin to replace the picture of your male shell in their heads with the picture of the real you that you are revealing to the world now.  You've been transgendered your whole life, but I would imagine they haven't known about it until comparatively recently.

Wishing you love, luck, joy and peace in your journey. :)

uncomfortable is ok as long as you all deal with it. when i started having breast it made my dad the same way. so we talked about it. we i talked and he freaked but after that he was cool. i would imagine your family would be too

Quote from: Tristan on November 22, 2013, 10:45:08 PM
uncomfortable is ok as long as you all deal with it. when i started having breast it made my dad the same way. so we talked about it. we i talked and he freaked but after that he was cool. i would imagine your family would be too

My family loves me, but they're definitely not cool with the new me. They're all Mormons and they can't wrap their ignorant minds around the concept of a transexual person. They just can't accept it. When I was a kid I was constantly stealing my sister and mother's clothes. I got caught several times and they never said anything. I used to tell them that I wanted to be a girl but they just
Ignored me.

I'm so sick of their bullsh*t.  I wish I didn't desperately want their love and approval. I'm such a happy girl though, besides them everything in my life is wonderful. I'm not going to let them ruin my life anymore.

Quote from: Robin Mack on November 22, 2013, 03:18:29 PM
*hug*

You are probably right.  Especially if you are not in their physical presence much, they probably still think of you as your bio gender, remember you, etc.  When you see them face to face, that's when it will likely all come rushing back again.

Has there ever been a dear friend in your childhood that you didn't see for some time, and suddenly when you saw them again they had changed dramatically?  I imagine it would feel like that, to me, seeing one of my daughters transition "all at once".  I'm out to my mother, who is supportive and loving, but I've been wrestling with this, too, since she is at least 16 hours' drive away.  To her, I'm still her son, when she thinks of me she probably thinks of me the way I look in the most recent picture, viewed through the lens of her perspective of the way I grew up.  I know that it will be hard for her, when I transition fully, if I don't keep her in the loop gradually through pictures during HRT. 

I still get wistful and sad when I see how tall my grandson has grown between visits...

*hug*

I think it will probably take time and many visits for them to accept the new you and begin to replace the picture of your male shell in their heads with the picture of the real you that you are revealing to the world now.  You've been transgendered your whole life, but I would imagine they haven't known about it until comparatively recently.

Wishing you love, luck, joy and peace in your journey. :)

Thank you for saying this. I know it won't be easy for them but eventually they'll have to accept me. I'm sure they all think I'm s sinner and that I'm going to hell and all that nonsense. I can see it in their eyes. They look all sad and concerned even though I'm smiling and glowing. They just don't seem to care at all that I'm happy now. I've tried to explain it to them but they're just not willing to listen to anything that doesn't jive with the Mormon teachings. Soooooooo stupid.

Quote from: brianna1016 on November 22, 2013, 01:35:59 AM
Its been a year since I went full time, and 9 months hrt. As I become happier and more beautiful as the woman I've always been, I notice my family becoming more uncomfortable. I don't think they knew it was possible for someone to change the way I have. I hadn't seen them since July and just recently Skyped.

They weren't making eye contact with me. They were nervous too. It felt good actually. They can see how happy I've become. They can't say sh*t. I'm sure they'll never actually come out and say they're happy for me. Or say they're glad I didn't kill myself last year. Or use my female name ( my mom is though).

Its all unspoken in my family. If they're uncomfortable about something they simply pretend it doesn't exist. I find it amusing that they can't get away with ignoring me any more. I feel like I'm in control now. Lol.

I'm so glad that you're happy and flourishing in the new you. With family it's always hard because they have known you your whole life. It takes time for the adjustment and if they don't come around it's a fault of their own for not seeing that everything you've done and continue to do is an improvement.

Quote from: evecrook on November 22, 2013, 02:17:09 PM
congratulations on your year I'm slowly trying to muster the courage

The courage is there you just gotta tap into it. Remember every mountain was climbed one step at a time. Take it slow and know you have us for support and love along the way.