Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So I am now in my fifth year of college I came from a two year school with 61 credits, I came into my new school fall of 2012. That first semester due to my near suicide attempt and following depression I failed, going to be applying for a retroactive withdrawal. I had to withdraw from the spring semester because of my depression and then this fall I'm not sure what my grades will be again due to depression. Right now I'm feeling lost with no job prospects or any desire to continue with my schooling. I feel really tired of going to school, I just don't have the motivation. I also don't know when I'll be able to graduate. Personally I don't want to step foot in another class again and I'm probably not going to be signing up for classes for the next semester. I feel like I'm at a breaking point with school especially seeing all my friends and my cousin finally graduating and moving on from four year school while I'm stuck. I have basically no job experience except for life guarding for a year and a half and being fired from target after just under three months. Honestly I have no clue what I can do having almost no job experience and no degree, and I don't want to be sitting around doing nothing. It's horrible how worthless this is making me feel and I can't say how many times this has caused me to break down :icon_cry:

I'm sorry to here this.  You will find that it will all work out, though.  I made the decision to drop out of college, and in no way try to influence anyone.  I worked many different jobs totally opposite of what I felt I should do.  Auto Tech, denture maker, long haul truck driver and now of all things an operations manager for 13yrs at a HVAC distributor.  Believe me, things sometimes fall into place.  I'm not saying my situation is perfect, but I do try to grab onto opportunities however small that they may seem, because they all have the possibility to build into something bigger. 

I wish your future the best, and I know you will find it.

**Stacy

Riley i hope that you might check out the college advisors or counselors who can readily tell you how close you are to a degree or suggest career ideas.  Sometimes volunteering as an assistant or just to shadow someone in a field you like can help you break in.  Most transferable college credits are good for 5 years (in the USA) so you do have time to take a break.  The "trades" are another way to go with apprenticeships and journeymen programs in fields from plumbing to aircraft machinist. 

Almost any job can be fun if you are doing something you find meaningful.  Even digging a ditch is OK when we work with good people?

Dealing with studies and gender issues is never a fun combo. I struggled with it through university and lost a lot of my second year due to depression. A lot of that changed in the following two years not only when I changed courses to something more meaningful to me but also when I became involved with campus activities I enjoyed and met other students who I really got along well with. I started transitioning with a year of graduating so I wasn't trying to juggle the two simultaneously but turning my whole university experience around helped get me through that rough patch.

I agree with Tessa, it might be you need some guidance in the direction you'd like to work in. It's really tough on young people to be expected to know what they want to "be" coming straight out of high school. A lot of people I knew never ended up working in the area they studied in, or if they did they ultimately got another degree so they could work in some completely different field. Bottom line, it feels difficult because it is difficult, no two ways about it.

I can say I can relate on the failing, my GPA is so far in the toilet after only one semester, and my father is furious about it, saying I didn't spend enough time studying (which is false, I spent over 20 hours a week studying)  Balancing gender issues and school isn't fun, but once you start getting the gender issues sorted out, then school should come much easier.

Riley skye,

Have you talked to your Profs? I teach at Flinders Uni in Adelaide and I tend to have a very sympathetic ear for students who come to me with gender issues. I and other staff members do know how tough students who are 'different', for whatever reason, have life and we try very hard to help with life guidance and help with study plans etc.

But if people don't approach me I can't do much for them; telling me they have problems after the fact really limits what I can do.

Shew, college definatly isn't for everyone. I feel you. Sometimes I feel awful because I skipped out on it while my friends are trudging along, but then I remind myself I barely made it through High school with my sanity, so that kind of work load isn't gonna happen. Not like it's going to help much anyway. You only really learn to be a Professional Student.

Enough about my own ranting when I'm supposed to comment on yours though xD...despite my own feelings I do hope you find the strength to continue. It really does pay off in the end when considering that it's a lot more of an expectation now, but you don't need it to be happy. The smallest things can lead to much larger ones, and you can't get experience by not trying anything, right? Best of luck.

*hugs Riley* Wish I could offer advice but I'm in a similar situation. My grades have dipped since starting HRT and I wish I could take a break to get my head on straight but I'm on financial aid and have all these plans, so it's not an option... I keep at it because I have to... >_<

I wish I had answers but I am in the same boat as well lol