Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi Everyone,

As i mentioned in earlier posts, i decided it's time to stop rationalizing the whole GID and just start to experience it. I've made many babysteps. Shown myself en-femme to some friends in the safety of their homes.  Made a big step two days ago by walking through a busy city for half an hour en femme at night. I dont think that I had drawn any attention from people passin gme.  And now for my upcoming birthday party a friend of mine gave me tickets to a concert and is challenging me to come as Melanie. 

One side of me feels like its the most scary thing i could do; and feels like running away from the idea; but i decided to face my fears and just go.  I have added two pictures and would love your opinion if you think i would pass like this.  I still have to work on my voice; i dont have the skill to make it in any way feminine yet, but i'll let my friend do the talking.

I'm busy picking something nice to wear.  Lost 40lbs of weight this year so i think i need to go shopping for things that really fit. I already got my grey hairs colored black; started laser hair removal for the facial hair, so thats almost gone, and made an appointment with the hairdresser that wants to style my hair for tomorrow and put extensions in.

Do you think i could pass like this?  Do you have any recommendations?  Adrenaline is already running through my vanes all day. Excited and scared as hell at the same time.  But there's no running in 2.5" heels i guess :)

This is how i looked like on wednesday; when I was on the street for the first time ever:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimageshack.com%2Fa%2Fimg22%2F392%2F24p6.jpg&hash=a356b5ea19e5da3eb7d6e8f86782018435d5aa59)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimageshack.com%2Fa%2Fimg819%2F3750%2F7uxl.jpg&hash=017f67ab75c3f52eacad4b32c0fecd410d8a9c67)

I think that you will do just fine. I wouldn't give you a second look if I saw you on the street.

Remember to have fun!  :D

You look fabulous!  Well done on the weight loss.  I dumped 35 lbs before I had the courage to wander the streets as myself for the first time.  Nobody seemed to pay much attention, and I am not nearly as pretty as you.  Take a friend, pay attention to your voice, smile, and do a little dance when you get home.

Peace   ;D

Hi Girls (and guys),

I did it!  I went out; managed not to speak to anyone and attended a large concert as Melanie. The day started with an urgent shopping spree.  Apparently i lost so much weight that the skirt i intended to wear didn't stay in place.  Within an hour I found another skirt (2 sizes smaller). 

Then I went to a friend who's a makeup artist and hairdresser.  And i was so amazingly happy with the result.  Looking like this i felt i could conquer the world. 

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimageshack.us%2Fscaled%2Fmedium%2F845%2Fdlgi.jpg&hash=03fa6f77fe3f998573905deb27faeefa3b0c362a)

I dont have the feeling people recognised me as as being different. I didn't notice anyone staring at me or giving me a second look.  I only noticed one security guard winking at his colleague when I walked by, but i cant even tell for sure if it's because of me. 

Walking on high heels went quite well.  Stairs and streets were no problems, I only had to get used to walk the downslope of the parking garage.  It went down quite steeply but after 10 seconds i got the hang of it.  After 2 hours my feet did start to hurt; but thats just something I need to get used to.

At night i had a small afterparty at a friends place to celebrate my first night out. 

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimageshack.us%2Fscaled%2Fmedium%2F844%2Fgesx.jpg&hash=cf68c0db3a911f7ec4dd44ac319132555d572de0)

I considered it a big step and very worth it. Now I just need to do the makeup on my own :).  I also asked my friend to make pictures of my back, but that still looked quite massive. I'm still busy losing more weight; but any tips how to make the upper body smaller? or make it appear smaller?

And @JulieBlair:  Did do the little dance!!! :)

Quote from: Melanie_R on December 23, 2013, 05:21:31 AMI only noticed one security guard winking at his colleague when I walked by, but i cant even tell for sure if it's because of me.

I think he was winking because you're such a  beautiful woman, Melanie. You are really stunning. Don't worry. You've got the look down. Welcome to Susan's, BTW.

Hi Melanie.

you're a lovely lady...with a lovely top half that is perfectly fine.

Hey girlfriend,
You are amazing.  First time out, and went to a concert!  You rock.  Now time to do it again. (At least the dance)

That's fantastic. You look great and it sounds like you had a lot of fun. No turning back now girl;)

Just went out in Amsterdam as well.  :) Just a walk along the canals.  Still afraid to open my mouth; but I have just subscribed to a specialized language coach to train a female voice. Making my baby steps out there to live as  a woman someday.

Congrats on all the progress and you look fantastic.  ;D

Melanie, if I had a thousandth of your looks, I would full time right now. I see no male at all. You are gorgeous girl! :)

you pass very well as is, like you would really have to be up in your face to be clocked, dont be scurred, do you lol

You guys got me smiling here :) Thanks! Keep you posted. Voice therapy starts on jan 23th, cant wait, too eager to start.

Melanie, I think you look just fabulous.  You have nothing to worry about.

You look fantastic Melanie - I'm being completely honest here, there's no way in hell you've got any male traits. You look 100% female as far as I'm concerned.

Hi Melanie!

I went out in public for the first time on new years with a friend, and I've been out a couple of times since then. It was pretty scary until I saw how I was being treated and started to relax.

The only advice I'd give is to try and be yourself and be confident. The only time I got close to being clocked was when I wouldn't look a girl in the eye - she started studying my face and wondering why I was being so withdrawn with her, like there was something wrong with me. This only made me more nervous and scared!

I'm really glad things went well for you X

Thanks for the wonderful replies.  I just had my first voice therapy sessions and i'm looking forward to the next one. For some reason i find it hard to practice.  Not because of the excercises, but i think it's more a feeling that it's scary to acually hear myself. I've always been  busy hiding the female feelings, and practicing and hearing yourself female feels confronting and then make me smile. But i have to overcome this obstacle everytime.  Is it me or do you recognise it as well?

Quote from: Melanie_R on December 23, 2013, 05:21:31 AM
Hi   

You look beautiful congratulations. You definitely pass and any guy would be lucky and proud to have you on their arm!

Good luck and i hope great things continue to happen for u.

Rads xx

Quote from: Melanie_R on January 28, 2014, 05:57:16 PM
Is it me or do you recognise it as well?

I certainly recognise it - I think it comes from acting naturally in my body and actions, but having to 'put on' a voice. It's hard to keep up the training when everything else seems to come so naturally!

I can relate to that Sandra. Dressing female takes no effort.  I dont feel like I need to act at all.  The gestures , way of walking etc already come naturally, but the voice feels like acting.