Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Non-Transitioning and Detransitioning => Topic started by: insideontheoutside on December 28, 2013, 07:05:21 PM Return to Full Version
Title: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: insideontheoutside on December 28, 2013, 07:05:21 PM
Post by: insideontheoutside on December 28, 2013, 07:05:21 PM
I'm sure most people have heard this old saying before, but for anyone who hasn't, it's basically just saying that you have to accept the consequences of whatever actions you've done, even if they're unpleasant.
I can't tell you how many times over my life that this saying has ran through my head when it comes to gender issues though. Because of my choices or decisions on things, because of my non-action, or because of my actions, I've had to accept and live with the consequences.
But recently I've started to think about this old saying and realize that not all choices/decisions/actions cause permanent unpleasantness. Taking this metaphor farther, who would want to continue to lay in a bed without ever changing the sheets? Or putting on a new blanket or something? The bed can be changed, and therefore your actions that led you to be lying in that metaphorical bed, can be modified by other actions.
Does anyone else have any old sayings that they've clung to over the years and related to their gender issues?
Also, what is one positive way you can change the bed you're lying in right at this moment?
I can't tell you how many times over my life that this saying has ran through my head when it comes to gender issues though. Because of my choices or decisions on things, because of my non-action, or because of my actions, I've had to accept and live with the consequences.
But recently I've started to think about this old saying and realize that not all choices/decisions/actions cause permanent unpleasantness. Taking this metaphor farther, who would want to continue to lay in a bed without ever changing the sheets? Or putting on a new blanket or something? The bed can be changed, and therefore your actions that led you to be lying in that metaphorical bed, can be modified by other actions.
Does anyone else have any old sayings that they've clung to over the years and related to their gender issues?
Also, what is one positive way you can change the bed you're lying in right at this moment?
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: dalebert on December 28, 2013, 08:37:27 PM
Post by: dalebert on December 28, 2013, 08:37:27 PM
I finally moved my bed to a warmer room in my apt.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Ms. OBrien CVT on December 28, 2013, 08:51:19 PM
Post by: Ms. OBrien CVT on December 28, 2013, 08:51:19 PM
"The road to Hell is paved with good intentions" - My Dad.
I just added a heating blanket to the bed.
I just added a heating blanket to the bed.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: justpat on December 28, 2013, 08:56:19 PM
Post by: justpat on December 28, 2013, 08:56:19 PM
Adapt and survive has been my life's motto. From being in the service to living life the thought has served me well.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Anatta on December 28, 2013, 09:08:32 PM
Post by: Anatta on December 28, 2013, 09:08:32 PM
Kia Ora I,
Does anyone else have any old sayings that they've clung to over the years and related to their gender issues?
"This too will pass!" It's never failed me yet...
Also, what is one positive way you can change the bed you're lying in right at this moment?
By replacing the worn out nails with sharper ones ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
Does anyone else have any old sayings that they've clung to over the years and related to their gender issues?
"This too will pass!" It's never failed me yet...
Also, what is one positive way you can change the bed you're lying in right at this moment?
By replacing the worn out nails with sharper ones ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Cindy on December 28, 2013, 10:40:56 PM
Post by: Cindy on December 28, 2013, 10:40:56 PM
One step at a time.
But then you fall over if you take two at once!
But then you fall over if you take two at once!
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: DriftingCrow on December 28, 2013, 10:47:37 PM
Post by: DriftingCrow on December 28, 2013, 10:47:37 PM
I don't think I've really related this to my gender issues, but there's always that saying "you can't have your cake and eat it too". I've always been confused by this saying, what's the point of having cake if you're not going to eat it?
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Anatta on December 28, 2013, 10:50:12 PM
Post by: Anatta on December 28, 2013, 10:50:12 PM
Kia Ora,
"A journey of a thousand miles ( 1609.344 Kms for the metric people) begins with the first step !" lao Tzu
Keep on walking don't look back
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o4Fgh0KW_4
Metta Zenda :)
"A journey of a thousand miles ( 1609.344 Kms for the metric people) begins with the first step !" lao Tzu
Keep on walking don't look back
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o4Fgh0KW_4
Metta Zenda :)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: insideontheoutside on December 29, 2013, 01:03:40 AM
Post by: insideontheoutside on December 29, 2013, 01:03:40 AM
Quote from: LearnedHand on December 28, 2013, 10:47:37 PM
I don't think I've really related this to my gender issues, but there's always that saying "you can't have your cake and eat it too". I've always been confused by this saying, what's the point of having cake if you're not going to eat it?
That's one I like ... The meaning is like, "you can't have it both ways" .... Once you start eating the cake it's gone. However I believe you can have it both ways (I pretty much live that one!)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Randi on December 29, 2013, 01:37:19 AM
Post by: Randi on December 29, 2013, 01:37:19 AM
"All's well that ends....." It doesn't necessarily have to end "well", it just has to end!
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: LordKAT on December 29, 2013, 03:04:35 AM
Post by: LordKAT on December 29, 2013, 03:04:35 AM
You can't teach an old dog new tricks. No wonder parents are so hard to teach on gender issues.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: JoanneB on December 29, 2013, 06:38:35 AM
Post by: JoanneB on December 29, 2013, 06:38:35 AM
Baby steps is the best summation for mine.
I am often faced with taking on major projects, often nearly or completely on my own. At first they seem insurmountable. No way to fininsh in time.
"Just keep chipping away at it till you are done"
"Go for the low hanging fruit first"
Little things that get accomplished give hope, relieve fears of being overwhelmed. THe more you knock off the braver you get to tackle the bigger scary ones. This was and still is my philosophy in taking on the trans beast. One final big scary task left
I am often faced with taking on major projects, often nearly or completely on my own. At first they seem insurmountable. No way to fininsh in time.
"Just keep chipping away at it till you are done"
"Go for the low hanging fruit first"
Little things that get accomplished give hope, relieve fears of being overwhelmed. THe more you knock off the braver you get to tackle the bigger scary ones. This was and still is my philosophy in taking on the trans beast. One final big scary task left
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: suzifrommd on December 29, 2013, 06:58:53 AM
Post by: suzifrommd on December 29, 2013, 06:58:53 AM
"Everything happens for a reason"
True. But sometimes the reason is pure dumb bad luck.
True. But sometimes the reason is pure dumb bad luck.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: dalebert on December 29, 2013, 10:40:15 AM
Post by: dalebert on December 29, 2013, 10:40:15 AM
Quote from: JoanneB on December 29, 2013, 06:38:35 AM
"Just keep chipping away at it till you are done"
"Go for the low hanging fruit first"
Little things that get accomplished give hope, relieve fears of being overwhelmed. THe more you knock off the braver you get to tackle the bigger scary ones. This was and still is my philosophy in taking on the trans beast. One final big scary task left
I've gotten a lot done lately that I had been procrastinating on by applying this philosophy. It feels really good.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: gennee on December 29, 2013, 02:59:57 PM
Post by: gennee on December 29, 2013, 02:59:57 PM
Be who you are.
Don't let others define who you are.
Better late than never.
:)
Don't let others define who you are.
Better late than never.
:)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: laurenb on December 29, 2013, 03:23:51 PM
Post by: laurenb on December 29, 2013, 03:23:51 PM
"Keep passing the open windows"
John Irving fans will get this one...
John Irving fans will get this one...
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Oriah on December 29, 2013, 03:25:12 PM
Post by: Oriah on December 29, 2013, 03:25:12 PM
luck favors the bold
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Beth Andrea on December 29, 2013, 03:36:55 PM
Post by: Beth Andrea on December 29, 2013, 03:36:55 PM
Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead! ( <--Yes, I've used this during transition as well as other times in my life...I try hard to not be timid)
Love the other sayings in this thread, too.
Love the other sayings in this thread, too.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Oriah on December 29, 2013, 06:08:18 PM
Post by: Oriah on December 29, 2013, 06:08:18 PM
strike while the metal is hot
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Jennygirl on December 29, 2013, 10:11:50 PM
Post by: Jennygirl on December 29, 2013, 10:11:50 PM
I just found one recently that I liked a lot...
The blossoming of one flower is merely a reminder that all flowers are made to blossom.
Help water each other's flowers because they will all someday be beautiful.
We are all in this thing called life together :)
The blossoming of one flower is merely a reminder that all flowers are made to blossom.
Help water each other's flowers because they will all someday be beautiful.
We are all in this thing called life together :)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: E-Brennan on December 30, 2013, 04:36:17 PM
Post by: E-Brennan on December 30, 2013, 04:36:17 PM
One old saying that sticks in my mind is, "Be careful what you wish for."
The other pertinent saying is, "If it ain't broken, don't try to fix it."
I might long to be female day in and day out, but the reality of it could well be far worse than life right now.
And while very wise old sayings, they somehow don't really fit because practicality doesn't always lead to happiness.
2014 - perhaps the year I start to get a grip on these issues...
The other pertinent saying is, "If it ain't broken, don't try to fix it."
I might long to be female day in and day out, but the reality of it could well be far worse than life right now.
And while very wise old sayings, they somehow don't really fit because practicality doesn't always lead to happiness.
2014 - perhaps the year I start to get a grip on these issues...
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Marieee on December 30, 2013, 05:01:13 PM
Post by: Marieee on December 30, 2013, 05:01:13 PM
Acquaintances agree, friends argue.
Like the more you know someone, the more honest you can be with them.
I'am not out yet, but I feel like when I do, the people at work I tell will be like "Oh, okay." But family and friends may feel comfortable throwing out out a few more lines. ;)
Like the more you know someone, the more honest you can be with them.
I'am not out yet, but I feel like when I do, the people at work I tell will be like "Oh, okay." But family and friends may feel comfortable throwing out out a few more lines. ;)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Anatta on December 30, 2013, 07:11:20 PM
Post by: Anatta on December 30, 2013, 07:11:20 PM
Kia Ora,
"S/he who hesitates is lost !" ....<and in the next breath> "Look before you leap "
It would seem with some sayings, you just can't win ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
"S/he who hesitates is lost !" ....<and in the next breath> "Look before you leap "
It would seem with some sayings, you just can't win ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: kimdp999 on December 30, 2013, 07:37:37 PM
Post by: kimdp999 on December 30, 2013, 07:37:37 PM
My favorite is a Buddha quote: "Everything is Temporary", also have to re-phrase one; "Fortune favors the bold" :D, and another is, "The lord helps those who help themselves" :)
Cheers
Kim
Cheers
Kim
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: LordKAT on December 30, 2013, 10:19:30 PM
Post by: LordKAT on December 30, 2013, 10:19:30 PM
From a catholic rite but it fits life.
Remember man, that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.
It helps to realize that many things are trivial in the grand scheme of things.
Remember man, that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.
It helps to realize that many things are trivial in the grand scheme of things.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Anatta on December 31, 2013, 04:17:17 PM
Post by: Anatta on December 31, 2013, 04:17:17 PM
Kia Ora,
"vēnī, vīdī, vīcī "(I came I saw I conquered)
"You don't know(what you can do) until you try!"
Metta Zenda :)
"vēnī, vīdī, vīcī "(I came I saw I conquered)
"You don't know(what you can do) until you try!"
Metta Zenda :)
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: LordKAT on December 31, 2013, 08:02:58 PM
Post by: LordKAT on December 31, 2013, 08:02:58 PM
My favorite that my Dad taught me is,
Every road leads to home.
Every road leads to home.
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: Jamie D on January 02, 2014, 04:31:39 AM
Post by: Jamie D on January 02, 2014, 04:31:39 AM
"The love you take is equal to the love you make."
Title: Re: "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
Post by: JustEmily on January 02, 2014, 11:35:14 PM
Post by: JustEmily on January 02, 2014, 11:35:14 PM
Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans