Community Conversation => Transitioning => Coming out of the closet => Topic started by: Emi on February 05, 2014, 01:17:39 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Started coming out
Post by: Emi on February 05, 2014, 01:17:39 AM
Post by: Emi on February 05, 2014, 01:17:39 AM
I'm actually a boy but wanna be a MTF and I started saying it to people. First I told my former best friend but he just think it's a puberty crazy thought and doesnt believe that I'm serious and doesnt support me. :(
Then I came out to my mom and she said I must be insane to have such thoughts and that Internet, games, and TV made me mad. Then I continued speaking again and again to her and she said that she would never allow me to transition as long as she has rights on me because I'm her last son and she doesnt want me to change. I can understand that but she doesnt support me in my feelings... She's making me crazy by always telling me I'm a boy, that I'll be a good man, etc... :(
And last week I came out to another friend who is a bit more comprehensive. He said me that I could do what I want but not crazy things and said me that I need a therapist first. I know that but I need my mother to allow me to see one. :-\
Are these average reactions from the people you came out to ?
What should I do next ?
Please tell me, I feel lost... :(
Then I came out to my mom and she said I must be insane to have such thoughts and that Internet, games, and TV made me mad. Then I continued speaking again and again to her and she said that she would never allow me to transition as long as she has rights on me because I'm her last son and she doesnt want me to change. I can understand that but she doesnt support me in my feelings... She's making me crazy by always telling me I'm a boy, that I'll be a good man, etc... :(
And last week I came out to another friend who is a bit more comprehensive. He said me that I could do what I want but not crazy things and said me that I need a therapist first. I know that but I need my mother to allow me to see one. :-\
Are these average reactions from the people you came out to ?
What should I do next ?
Please tell me, I feel lost... :(
Title: Re: Started coming out
Post by: Catherine Sarah on February 05, 2014, 01:27:51 AM
Post by: Catherine Sarah on February 05, 2014, 01:27:51 AM
Hi LonelyFrench,
The reactions you are experiencing from others is quite normal, for an uneducated society. To help your mother understand, you need to give her some medical documents hat explain the situation. Have a look through the Wiki section here, there is plenty of such material.
->-bleeped-<- is so far removed from society's understanding, you need to learn to provide those who need to know, documentary evidence of your feelings. Otherwise they I'll just consider you crazy. And that's the furtherest thing form the truth. Maybe you could even suggest your Mum comes to the first therapy session so she can hear it from herself BUT you need to find a therapist who is very familiar with transgender issues.
Keep in touch and let us know how you are coping.
Huggs
Catherine
The reactions you are experiencing from others is quite normal, for an uneducated society. To help your mother understand, you need to give her some medical documents hat explain the situation. Have a look through the Wiki section here, there is plenty of such material.
->-bleeped-<- is so far removed from society's understanding, you need to learn to provide those who need to know, documentary evidence of your feelings. Otherwise they I'll just consider you crazy. And that's the furtherest thing form the truth. Maybe you could even suggest your Mum comes to the first therapy session so she can hear it from herself BUT you need to find a therapist who is very familiar with transgender issues.
Keep in touch and let us know how you are coping.
Huggs
Catherine
Title: Re: Started coming out
Post by: Emi on February 05, 2014, 07:39:27 AM
Post by: Emi on February 05, 2014, 07:39:27 AM
Yeah I know but it's quite hard since I live in France and Donna E sent me a list of specialized therapists but the nearest is far from where I live...
And it's also hard to find really good infos in french...
And also I think my mom thinks I'm gay but I'm not and she's kinda homophobic ! :-\
Meanwhile in France, there are debates about teaching the "gender theory" in schools based on totally wrong rumors. My mom heard this and thought a teacher made me crazy by saying that I can be either a man or a woman but she's totally wrong. I'm thinking about transitionning for months or maybe one or two years. :-\
And it's also hard to find really good infos in french...
And also I think my mom thinks I'm gay but I'm not and she's kinda homophobic ! :-\
Meanwhile in France, there are debates about teaching the "gender theory" in schools based on totally wrong rumors. My mom heard this and thought a teacher made me crazy by saying that I can be either a man or a woman but she's totally wrong. I'm thinking about transitionning for months or maybe one or two years. :-\