Community Conversation => Transitioning => Therapy => Topic started by: thevaliantx on March 07, 2014, 05:01:23 PM Return to Full Version

Title: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: thevaliantx on March 07, 2014, 05:01:23 PM
about their experience with the TG/TS population?  One in Cincinnati, OH became defensive (over email) when I asked her this and told me that if I had a problem with her credentials that I could look for another therapist.  This same therapist went on to say that 85%of her practice is with the TG/TS population and that she sees 10-15 TG/TS clients per week. 

Have you ever encountered this sort of thing with therapists?  How did you deal with it?  I am very sensitive in conflict situations.

Hugs.
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: Athena on March 07, 2014, 05:24:03 PM
If you haven't progressed very far with this therapist I might consider a different one. If 85 % of her practice is with the TG community then I would think she would be more receptive to such a question. A therapist that seems hostile is not what people need.
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: thevaliantx on March 07, 2014, 07:35:31 PM
From my first email to her she seemed like she just didn't have the time for me.  When we did our consultation over the phone, she couldn't wait to end the conversation.  I bet it lasted all of one minute, two minutes top.  In her last email to me it was made clear that I was irritating her.  I did let her know that she is difficult to write to or talk with.  My wife saw the emails and got the same impression.
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: justjournalhonestly on March 07, 2014, 07:39:19 PM
OOH, this makes me mad, I can't stand people like her. She is more worried about herself than any of her clients, as they are just stats to pad her resume if this is how she acts. RUN AWAY! My oh my do I feel lucky to have stumbled onto a decent person for a therapist first try.
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: suzifrommd on March 07, 2014, 07:41:50 PM
Had that same experience. She wasn't defensive, she was vague. She wouldn't attempt to quantify the number of trans people she'd worked with.

She ended up useless and ignorant. I should have gone with my gut.

This woman sounds like she is not very sensitive. I'd look elsewhere if it were me.
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: Adam (birkin) on March 07, 2014, 09:07:34 PM
All I have to say is: that's weird. Seriously...she doesn't sound very professional because that is a totally harmless question.
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on March 07, 2014, 09:39:45 PM
Might your exact words reveal something as to the reason for her reaction?  Or was it just "can you tell me about your experience with  the tg/ts population"
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: Just Shelly on March 07, 2014, 09:50:02 PM
85% of her clients are transgender....BS!! There is no way....not even in San Francisco would this be the case....and in this is in Ohio...ya sure!!

And like someone else said why would she get offended then, if that was the case!
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: thevaliantx on March 07, 2014, 10:51:24 PM
Quote from: Caysee Danielle on March 07, 2014, 09:39:45 PM
Might your exact words reveal something as to the reason for her reaction?  Or was it just "can you tell me about your experience with  the tg/ts population"

I let her know how I felt (the words I used above) after she treated me that way, so no......I don't think anything I wrote was justification for that kind of treatment.
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: kelly_aus on March 08, 2014, 12:29:27 AM
Any therapist worth their qualifications should be more than happy to answer questions about their speciality..

Quote from: Just Shelly on March 07, 2014, 09:50:02 PM
85% of her clients are transgender....BS!! There is no way....not even in San Francisco would this be the case....and in this is in Ohio...ya sure!!

And like someone else said why would she get offended then, if that was the case!

I live in a city of less than 3,000,000.. My therapist only sees trans clients..
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: thevaliantx on March 08, 2014, 02:12:32 AM
Since I am so afraid to offend anyone who might 'want' to help me is there a list of questions that I can literally cut and paste into an email as my introduction  to a new therapist and to get things rolling in the right direction?
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: Xenguy on March 08, 2014, 02:49:09 PM
It depends, but I think a good therapist wouldn't get offended. I personally wouldn't go for a therapist that seems stingy, it's a risk.
I also wouldn't go for a therapist that doesn't seem to want to get back to you or doesn't take an interest in your problems.

When I was looking for therapists, my worst experience was with a woman who 'claims' she treated Transexual clients, but hung up when I asked her about her trans* clients, when I managed call her back from a different phone (Since she would no longer answer to mine) I told her, her website said she was LGBT friendly, she ended up being really defensive and agitated. :/

Eventually, I found a guy who was flexible and took an interest in my problems, calling me back a mere few minutes after I called him. We spoke, and he was lenient in price and time, even going as far as to give me a free first session after he heard I came from a really poor family. I was of course suspicious, but he didn't even get offended when I told him I wasn't looking for a 'gate keeper' He is really helpful and we are currently on our second session.

Needless to say, I hope you find a good therapist, most of the time it's worth the hard work it takes to find one. (:
Title: Re: Therapists who get offended when asked ...
Post by: thevaliantx on March 08, 2014, 04:32:53 PM
I may have found one.  She seems honest enough, stating that she doesn't accept insurance because feels that the insurance companies disempower clients bt restricting them to 50 minutes and by telling clients when they can go to sessions (and have them covered) and how many they can go to.  Is my leg being pulled?  In her email she said she has no experience working with the families/spouses of her TG/TS clients because close ones think they don't need any help.  It sounds sort of fishy.  She said that she only has one sliding scale spot open.  Her sessions are usually 1 hour 20 minutes long, which I like, I am just not sure about "how good" she is.  I did like the fact that out of the therapists I have contacted so far she told me that I did not need a letter of referral for HRT from her and that I just need to head to the endo's office.  Her website is at www.counselinginlexington.com ....