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Title: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Carlota on March 09, 2014, 09:06:43 PM
Post by: Carlota on March 09, 2014, 09:06:43 PM
Hi!
Darn it, I posted somewhere else before posting here first. Sorry for the rudeness, that was like going into someone's house before introducing yourself. I tend to write a lot, which I am somewhat sorry for beforehand.
People can call me Carlota, or magnolias21, either one is dandy. ;) I am cis woman (female assigned at birth and female identified). My girlfriend, who I will call Sarah, is trans woman (male assigned at birth but female identified) and October of this year will make it three years for us together. I am a first generation immigrant and have strong ties to my families culture and language, which influenced me to become a teacher. Sarah is an an American war veteran, and fortunately she doesn't suffer from many of the difficult things she endured in the war (ptsd, paranoia, etc.). Oh, and for the sake of simplicity, I am bisexual.
I have known her for about four/five years now. We met in college before she transitioned. A year after she came out we began to go out. I liked her before she came out, but my social anxiety, lack of self esteem, and my past made it impossible for me to even spark up a conversation one-on-one. When she came out, I realized I still liked her, but that I was unsure how to be supportive and understanding of her coming out. Not to mention, my crippling anxiety that had held me back from a romantic relationship my whole life. I spent that year learning about trans issues, rights, and news. I wanted to learn how to be supportive and become less ignorant about things. I also began to talk more to her and work on my social anxiety. We would eventually become friends, and I was actually happy that at least I was there to be her friend.I told my friend that I liked her a lot. Apparently, my friend can't even take his own secrets to his grave. He, along with other of our friends we have, began to plot things out for Sarah and me to go out. After a few events that seem to have been taken from a rom-com, Sarah and I started to go out.
It hasn't been the easiest relationship in part to my mental and emotional being. I tend to go through depressive periods and have tried her patience by my sever lack of self esteem and self value. I admit that I haven't been the easiest person, but through communicating with Sarah and a whole lot of reflection, we have managed through a lot. She is significantly older than me, which might help her to be patient with me and see things through a different perspective.
I still have a lot to learn, and I am no an expert when it comes to transgender related issues and topics. I sometimes put my foot in my mouth, but I try with each day to become better and more supportive. This is part of the reason I joined this amazing forum. I find myself alone sometimes helping my SO and her journey. I am happy that there are places like this where trans* folks, people of a variety of gender identities, and their families, friends, and SOs can come together. :)
Gotta follow what I tell my students, keep it simple. ^-^
Darn it, I posted somewhere else before posting here first. Sorry for the rudeness, that was like going into someone's house before introducing yourself. I tend to write a lot, which I am somewhat sorry for beforehand.
People can call me Carlota, or magnolias21, either one is dandy. ;) I am cis woman (female assigned at birth and female identified). My girlfriend, who I will call Sarah, is trans woman (male assigned at birth but female identified) and October of this year will make it three years for us together. I am a first generation immigrant and have strong ties to my families culture and language, which influenced me to become a teacher. Sarah is an an American war veteran, and fortunately she doesn't suffer from many of the difficult things she endured in the war (ptsd, paranoia, etc.). Oh, and for the sake of simplicity, I am bisexual.
I have known her for about four/five years now. We met in college before she transitioned. A year after she came out we began to go out. I liked her before she came out, but my social anxiety, lack of self esteem, and my past made it impossible for me to even spark up a conversation one-on-one. When she came out, I realized I still liked her, but that I was unsure how to be supportive and understanding of her coming out. Not to mention, my crippling anxiety that had held me back from a romantic relationship my whole life. I spent that year learning about trans issues, rights, and news. I wanted to learn how to be supportive and become less ignorant about things. I also began to talk more to her and work on my social anxiety. We would eventually become friends, and I was actually happy that at least I was there to be her friend.I told my friend that I liked her a lot. Apparently, my friend can't even take his own secrets to his grave. He, along with other of our friends we have, began to plot things out for Sarah and me to go out. After a few events that seem to have been taken from a rom-com, Sarah and I started to go out.
It hasn't been the easiest relationship in part to my mental and emotional being. I tend to go through depressive periods and have tried her patience by my sever lack of self esteem and self value. I admit that I haven't been the easiest person, but through communicating with Sarah and a whole lot of reflection, we have managed through a lot. She is significantly older than me, which might help her to be patient with me and see things through a different perspective.
I still have a lot to learn, and I am no an expert when it comes to transgender related issues and topics. I sometimes put my foot in my mouth, but I try with each day to become better and more supportive. This is part of the reason I joined this amazing forum. I find myself alone sometimes helping my SO and her journey. I am happy that there are places like this where trans* folks, people of a variety of gender identities, and their families, friends, and SOs can come together. :)
Gotta follow what I tell my students, keep it simple. ^-^
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Jessica Merriman on March 09, 2014, 09:34:29 PM
Post by: Jessica Merriman on March 09, 2014, 09:34:29 PM
A big warm welcome to the family Carlota! It is so nice to see support for our community and individuals. I personally don't care where you posted as long as I got to meet you. You sound like someone we are glad to have with us. This is not just a support site, but a true family and it will not take you too long to find that out. Feel free to rant, vent, share good news (we like that a bunch), learn or just have some fun and meet the rest of the family. While you are at it get your SO to join as well, the more the merrier! Here is a BIG HUG :icon_hug: to welcome you and make you feel at home! :)
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Jamie D on March 09, 2014, 09:40:19 PM
Post by: Jamie D on March 09, 2014, 09:40:19 PM
Carlota - it was well after 120 posts before I made an intro!
We have an SO board set aside for significant others of transpersons.
These links will help you navigate the site:
We have an SO board set aside for significant others of transpersons.
These links will help you navigate the site:
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
- Age and the Forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,62197.msg405545.html#msg405545)
- Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
- Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Carlota on March 09, 2014, 10:41:55 PM
Post by: Carlota on March 09, 2014, 10:41:55 PM
Quote from: Jessica Merriman on March 09, 2014, 09:34:29 PM
This is not just a support site, but a true family and it will not take you too long to find that out. Feel free to rant, vent, share good news (we like that a bunch), learn or just have some fun and meet the rest of the family. While you are at it get your SO to join as well, the more the merrier! Here is a BIG HUG :icon_hug: to welcome you and make you feel at home! :)
My SO was the one that pointed me here. I told her I wished there was a place where I could talk to others about the things we are facing, a place to vent, share, the works. She tends to be more observant and do things from afar, but I'd love for her to also join a community where she feels safe to share and be herself. Btw, thank you Jessica for giving me insight into my moving out problem in another post I made. :)
Thank you, Jamie for the links. They're very helpful. :)
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Jamie D on March 09, 2014, 10:56:18 PM
Post by: Jamie D on March 09, 2014, 10:56:18 PM
No problema, mi amiga. Si puedo ser de servicio, pregunte. ;)
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Carlota on March 09, 2014, 11:21:41 PM
Post by: Carlota on March 09, 2014, 11:21:41 PM
¡Me encantaría leer que hay otras personas que también sepan escribir y leer español! :D. Muchas gracias por su gentileza.
I would love to read that there are other people who also know how to write and read in Spanish! :D Thank you very much for your graciousness.
I would love to read that there are other people who also know how to write and read in Spanish! :D Thank you very much for your graciousness.
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Jamie D on March 09, 2014, 11:35:27 PM
Post by: Jamie D on March 09, 2014, 11:35:27 PM
Mi madre y mi abuela eran fluente en español. ¿Yo? No tanto. Que lastima. :(
We have many member from Spain, South and Central America, and Mexico.
We have many member from Spain, South and Central America, and Mexico.
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: 930310 on March 10, 2014, 05:05:42 AM
Post by: 930310 on March 10, 2014, 05:05:42 AM
Welcome to the forums Charlota!
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Carlota on March 10, 2014, 06:18:59 PM
Post by: Carlota on March 10, 2014, 06:18:59 PM
Thanks for the warm welcoming! :)
Title: Re: Oops, should've started here! :)
Post by: Carlota on March 10, 2014, 06:20:59 PM
Post by: Carlota on March 10, 2014, 06:20:59 PM
Quote from: Jamie D on March 09, 2014, 11:35:27 PM
Mi madre y mi abuela eran fluente en español. ¿Yo? No tanto. Que lastima. :(
We have many member from Spain, South and Central America, and Mexico.
It is nice to read that there is such a diversity here. :)