Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So i've been taking Spiro for 23 days as my little thingy down there suggests, and its been a low dose. My doctor increased my dosage and practically doubled it a week ago, so I was splitting my doses morning and lunch time. Today i felt like maybe i should take the Spiro all at once and simply split the Estradiol tablets instead. So i took my doubled dosage at once instead of taking one and one.

Today i'm at work and all i want to do is cry. All i can think about is about how my friends still refer to me with male pronouns after almost 6 months... i realize its not an overnight thing but you would think that 6 months would be long enough time to refer to me as female... especially since i dont dress male nor do I act male... It makes me feel like my friends only see a guy in drag... my wife is the only one who effortlessly genders me correctly.

And then thinking about how I put so much effort into looking fabulous (because I'm just like that, i like to look my best at all times) and to have someone so blatantly and directly refer to me as SIR despite my appearance and outfit and behavior... its like a slap in the face..

Anyway, I digress... I've had to fight back tears like 12 times already (I'm at work), and I've never reacted this way... ive never had to fight back tears. Could this be the result of me taking all the Spiro at once? Or am I just imagining things?

I think thats caused by estrogen not by spiro

But its important to have low t so e can do its work.
so that must be it.

I know that feel though , dont worry it will get better.

It's usually the E that makes you more emotional.

Are you full time and presenting like you do in your avatar? If so your friends don't sound much like friends. But if your technically not full time they might just be confused...maybe a talking to will sort them out. :)

Hope you feel happier soon!

Quote from: Ms Grace on March 12, 2014, 11:51:44 AM
It's usually the E that makes you more emotional.

Are you full time and presenting like you do in your avatar? If so your friends don't sound much like friends. But if your technically not full time they might just be confused...maybe a talking to will sort them out. :)

Hope you feel happier soon!

Yes I am full-time. I try to to talk to them but they always react like im angry... i try to be as calm and as kind and as understanding as possible but they always give this face like im being annoying. I don't often try because i really DONT like to be annoying... and they're argument is always the same "you know its hard and it takes time!"

Yes, I DO know... but half a year of time is a disgusting amount of time for you to change something as simple as pronoun usage. Especially if I've been presenting full time for the entire time being.

(by the way, the aggravation isnt aimed at you haha, its aimed at my friends :P )

Some people will never accept it, either because they object to it (morally or whatever) or they just can't mentally make the jump to "see" you as female, no matter how good you look.  You just have to accept it and not let it bother you.  The only alternative is to pull up stakes and move some place where no one knows you and start "blank slate" relationships.

They don't sound like very supportive friends. Slip-up happen, even with the most supportive person, but it seems like they're not even trying.

What james said its true , its an emotional issue...

even if you look totally female its the memories of the past that keeps your friends from seeing you as female...

some people can do it easier than others...
but yeah it seems that they re not trying

I mean my friends call me with female pronouns and I m not even presenting,,, :(

Quote from: JamesG on March 12, 2014, 12:05:49 PM
Some people will never accept it, either because they object to it (morally or whatever) or they just can't mentally make the jump to "see" you as female, no matter how good you look.  You just have to accept it and not let it bother you.  The only alternative is to pull up stakes and move some place where no one knows you and start "blank slate" relationships.

I'm sorry but I can't just not let it bother me, especially in social situations or public situations where it shatters my image not only to those around me, but to myself as well... If my friends can't possibly come to change a small insignificant (to them) part of their vocabulary use out of the most minimal amount of respect for me, then I don't feel i should waste my time with them. If they just can't bring themselves to see me as female, i can only accept it as long as they treat me accordingly and refer to me accordingly, but otherwise I may as well have just stayed Male if thats how they're going to present me to society every time we go out.

Quote from: FalsePrincess on March 12, 2014, 12:11:56 PM
What james said its true , its an emotional issue...

even if you look totally female its the memories of the past that keeps your friends from seeing you as female...

some people can do it easier than others...
but yeah it seems that they re not trying

I mean my friends call me with female pronouns and I m not even presenting,,, :(

I envy you. Its funny because in the beginning, my friends were "the most supportive" and my wife was the one who just couldnt deal with it... but now my wife is the only one who effortlessly refers to me as female with name and pronouns alike, and actually SEES me as a woman... while my friends  can't seem to stop using male pronouns... i mean at least if the hesitated or noticed their error it wouldnt bother me... but they have a WOMAN standing next to them and they so BLATANTLY say he and him and "this guy".... its really insulting... they don't even realize they are making an error... and i try to correct them as often as possible without being annoying or being a bitch, even though at this point i feel i'm entitled to be bitchy after half a year of such shoddy progress.

I've been trying to figure out ways to embarass them every time they make the error, like maybe calling them something they no longer go by or something they arent so that they can UNDERSTAND what they are doing... but i can't seem to figure out what. Maybe i should just call my female friends with male pronouns and vice versa, so they can get the picture.

Quote from: LittleEmily24 on March 12, 2014, 12:19:23 PM
I'm sorry but I can't just not let it bother me, especially in social situations or public situations where it shatters my image not only to those around me, but to myself as well... If my friends can't possibly come to change a small insignificant (to them) part of their vocabulary use out of the most minimal amount of respect for me, then I don't feel i should waste my time with them. If they just can't bring themselves to see me as female, i can only accept it as long as they treat me accordingly and refer to me accordingly, but otherwise I may as well have just stayed Male if thats how they're going to present me to society every time we go out.

I envy you. Its funny because in the beginning, my friends were "the most supportive" and my wife was the one who just couldnt deal with it... but now my wife is the only one who effortlessly refers to me as female with name and pronouns alike, and actually SEES me as a woman... while my friends  can't seem to stop using male pronouns... i mean at least if the hesitated or noticed their error it wouldnt bother me... but they have a WOMAN standing next to them and they so BLATANTLY say he and him and "this guy".... its really insulting... they don't even realize they are making an error... and i try to correct them as often as possible without being annoying or being a bitch, even though at this point i feel i'm entitled to be bitchy after half a year of such shoddy progress.

I've been trying to figure out ways to embarass them every time they make the error, like maybe calling them something they no longer go by or something they arent so that they can UNDERSTAND what they are doing... but i can't seem to figure out what. Maybe i should just call my female friends with male pronouns and vice versa, so they can get the picture.

You know that might not be a bad idea Emily.

Quote from: LittleEmily24 on March 12, 2014, 12:19:23 PM
i can only accept it as long as they treat me accordingly and refer to me accordingly, but otherwise I may as well have just stayed Male if thats how they're going to present me to society every time we go out.

Who are you transitioning for?  Yourself? or Them?

People you know are biased by their experience with you. The real way you can track your progress is how new people react to you, do they "clock you" or do they refer to you with the correct pronoun and social behavior?

Quote
I've been trying to figure out ways to embarass them every time they make the error, like maybe calling them something they no longer go by or something they arent so that they can UNDERSTAND what they are doing... but i can't seem to figure out what. Maybe i should just call my female friends with male pronouns and vice versa, so they can get the picture.

Then they really will call you a bitch. LOL.  I guess that will achieve your objective in a fashion, at the cost of your relationship with them... Again, ultimately that might be what it takes.  That's one of the costs of transitioning sometimes.  :-\

Split Spiro between am and pm for health reasons (i.e. electrolytes, heart function). Too much at once could cause problems. Are you still taking medroxyprogesterone? That can cause depression, sadness, irritation, etc.

Could be low E or a reaction to a spike and lull in E levels through the day, or life could be hard right now.