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Title: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: Henny on March 22, 2014, 05:51:53 AM
Post by: Henny on March 22, 2014, 05:51:53 AM
Hi there,
I'm a straight guy. Waited for my penis to grow in till I was about 7 before I realized. Always had phantom limb syndrome in that area, from the time I was a kid. Still do.
Never fit in with the lesbian community much although they were very helpful to me in earlier years.
Im almost 30 and an actor. For multiple reasons, my career being one, I am not transitioning or "passing" as male and don't plan to. I'm not the butchest guy and most people think I'm a lesbian if not a straight chick.
I have long hair and wear makeup sometimes cause I like the way it makes me look in this particular situation of a body I have.
I still mourn my body at times and hate it but I'm trying to learn to accept it, at least generally. Sometimes I like it. Sometimes.
And also, though I feel that my body is not an accurate visual of who I am, I think it is important for people to start to see guys that look like me. And girls that look like any "Joe" on the street.
People have a harder time with pronouns for me. Which makes sense. Pronouns are for outer appearance, really. Not actual. Even people that know and "see me" as a guy have a hard time with the pronouns. I don't mind as much, so long as they know me.
I know I'm a different face of the majority of the trans-guy community and I'm open to talking about it with anyone who is open to hear me. Some people don't believe that I am transgender because I am not transitioning and that is extremely frustrating and heartbreaking. But I get it.
I'm just looking for a place where I'll be acknowledged and believed in the midst of fighting for the integrity of my identity in daily life. I'm afraid to be judged by other trans-guys too because of my sometimes feminie outer appearance. Sooooo...this is me reaching out for community anyway.
Sorry for the long intro. Thanks for reading. And hello.
I'm a straight guy. Waited for my penis to grow in till I was about 7 before I realized. Always had phantom limb syndrome in that area, from the time I was a kid. Still do.
Never fit in with the lesbian community much although they were very helpful to me in earlier years.
Im almost 30 and an actor. For multiple reasons, my career being one, I am not transitioning or "passing" as male and don't plan to. I'm not the butchest guy and most people think I'm a lesbian if not a straight chick.
I have long hair and wear makeup sometimes cause I like the way it makes me look in this particular situation of a body I have.
I still mourn my body at times and hate it but I'm trying to learn to accept it, at least generally. Sometimes I like it. Sometimes.
And also, though I feel that my body is not an accurate visual of who I am, I think it is important for people to start to see guys that look like me. And girls that look like any "Joe" on the street.
People have a harder time with pronouns for me. Which makes sense. Pronouns are for outer appearance, really. Not actual. Even people that know and "see me" as a guy have a hard time with the pronouns. I don't mind as much, so long as they know me.
I know I'm a different face of the majority of the trans-guy community and I'm open to talking about it with anyone who is open to hear me. Some people don't believe that I am transgender because I am not transitioning and that is extremely frustrating and heartbreaking. But I get it.
I'm just looking for a place where I'll be acknowledged and believed in the midst of fighting for the integrity of my identity in daily life. I'm afraid to be judged by other trans-guys too because of my sometimes feminie outer appearance. Sooooo...this is me reaching out for community anyway.
Sorry for the long intro. Thanks for reading. And hello.
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: castle of glass on March 22, 2014, 06:16:24 AM
Post by: castle of glass on March 22, 2014, 06:16:24 AM
Hey Henny,
Welcome to the community man. I really enjoyed reading your intro and found it very interesting :)
Take care x
Welcome to the community man. I really enjoyed reading your intro and found it very interesting :)
Take care x
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: V M on March 22, 2014, 06:55:12 AM
Post by: V M on March 22, 2014, 06:55:12 AM
Hi Henny :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Please be sure to review
Hugs
V M
Welcome to Susan's :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Please be sure to review
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
- Age and the Forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,62197.msg405545.html#msg405545)
- Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
- Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
Hugs
V M
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: Jessica Merriman on March 22, 2014, 11:27:52 AM
Post by: Jessica Merriman on March 22, 2014, 11:27:52 AM
A big warm welcome to the family Henny! I am glad you found us and hope the information and support you will get here helps. All of us want you to succeed in life and be who you want to be. Your post was an interesting read for me as well. Feel free to rant, vent, share good news (we like this a LOT), learn or just have some distracting fun and meet the rest of the family, your family now. Here is a BIG HUG :icon_hug: to welcome you and make you feel right at home with us! :)
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: Shantel on March 22, 2014, 11:55:38 AM
Post by: Shantel on March 22, 2014, 11:55:38 AM
Hey there Henny, you're all good with us! :)
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: KatVonDoom on March 22, 2014, 12:47:46 PM
Post by: KatVonDoom on March 22, 2014, 12:47:46 PM
An ex-boyfriend of mine was a non-transitioning guy, and he was pretty active and well-regarded in the trans political community. One of the only guys I've ever known with prettier eyes than me, that bastard. :P
As a total newbie here also, welcome! :)
As a total newbie here also, welcome! :)
Title: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: Henny on March 25, 2014, 11:43:39 PM
Post by: Henny on March 25, 2014, 11:43:39 PM
Thanks so much everyone. I feel welcomed already.
And hi Kat. We can be newbie buddies! :)
And hi Kat. We can be newbie buddies! :)
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: FalseHybridPrincess on March 26, 2014, 12:25:20 AM
Post by: FalseHybridPrincess on March 26, 2014, 12:25:20 AM
Its what you are on the inside that counts :)
If you feel like a man then you are one , sure it will be harder for others to see you as one if you dont present accordingly but im sure they re trying:)
welcome :)
If you feel like a man then you are one , sure it will be harder for others to see you as one if you dont present accordingly but im sure they re trying:)
welcome :)
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: KatVonDoom on March 26, 2014, 11:59:06 AM
Post by: KatVonDoom on March 26, 2014, 11:59:06 AM
Kinda laughed for a second reading that, only because his name actually was "Joe", haha.
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: Roy on March 28, 2014, 04:09:40 AM
Post by: Roy on March 28, 2014, 04:09:40 AM
Hello!
I understand exactly where you're coming from and I not only believe you, I applaud you. Your post totally brightened my day. Now, I've just joined the forum myself, so I figure I'm not the best guy to trot out the welcome wagon... but I wanted to say welcome anyhow.
Welcome. And thanks for posting.
I understand exactly where you're coming from and I not only believe you, I applaud you. Your post totally brightened my day. Now, I've just joined the forum myself, so I figure I'm not the best guy to trot out the welcome wagon... but I wanted to say welcome anyhow.
Welcome. And thanks for posting.
Title: Re: I don't "pass" on purpose.
Post by: gennee on March 28, 2014, 03:40:30 PM
Post by: gennee on March 28, 2014, 03:40:30 PM
Welcome to Susan's, Henny. I'm not going to transition either. The important thing is
being happy in your own skin.
:)
being happy in your own skin.
:)