Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So I find myself in a conundrum. I have a job interview coming up this week. My first ever job interview as a woman. As of yet they have no idea I'm trans. I'm sure they'll figure it out the moment I open my mouth during the interview. But, I at least want to dress appropriately.

That said. I have no idea what constitutes as "appropriate" in the world of job interviews. As a man I'd press a pair of black slacks, put in a nice dress shirt and a tie, and call it good to go. But. I don't think I'm getting off that easy this time...

Went out shopping today. But, when you have no idea what you're looking for, it ain't easy. And the Cis friend I would normally turn to for guidance on these matters is out of town on vacation, and I wont see her again until the day before the interview. And, I'm not trying to scramble for clothing last minute. So... I got some things and hoped they'd work...

But, seeking advice from other transfolks who've stumbled through their first interview on the other side of the gender fence...

Outfit #1:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi947.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fad313%2Fmissadventure214%2Fphoto12_zps72daf17c.jpg&hash=5d934f3ff0379e86710275c243849a73cc5f3c2e)

The selfie is awful. The white spots "on the skirt" are actually on the camera lens... I dunno. I seems simple, but, also blah. The blouse to me seems too "hey, it's 1983 and I'm a 47 year upper middle class white woman on the way to her secretarial job"... What the camera didn't capture is the string of ->-bleeped-<-ty fake pearls that came attached to the blouse. But, I dunno. Maybe simple is good?

Outfit #2:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi947.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fad313%2Fmissadventure214%2Fphoto13_zps7a9af28e.jpg&hash=6fad65caa5f366c1a815df6cab546f11955a4bbf)

I like this outfit better. Although it seems a bit "mannish" to me. Maybe that's all in my mind tho - as a guy I had a dress shirt in the same exact color that I tended to wear to job interviews because, well, the color works for me (I think).

Bah. I dunno! I might try switching the skirts. Or, just going with a nice pair of black ladies slacks. But, I kinda feel like a skirt would be better because I kinda need all the "hey, this is a woman" points I can get.

Ugh. I'm gonna pilfer through my closet some more and see what else I can come up with. If anything seems promising I'll add them in... But, for now. Any opinions or feedback on interview wardrobes?

Of those two choices, Outfit #2 for sure.  The picture is better which is a lot of why I go for it.  But you already prefer it, so you would be more relaxed wearing it.

Good luck with the interview.  I hope you get the job!


Erin

Honestly, I don't think either of your outfits look professional...  they do not look put together and k don't think you should go like that. just being honest to save you them thinking that..

What type of position is it for?

I have never had a job so I don't know what is standard now but I can say that if you want to wear a skirt it should really be a pencil skirt and your blouse should be tucked. Shoes are basically gonna be flats or pumps,  I mean you ahould be fine with just a standard black blazer, blouse, black trousers or pencil skirt and flats, and beyond that looking nice is just about how you accessorize. If the job is less formal then you can incorporate colors in the blazer and blttoms and belt the pants if you want. Blazer buttoned or unbuttoned would also be based on the formality. A cardigan instead would be OK too probably depending. And for formal I would go for pumps over flats.

I think the most important thing here is please don't prioritize looking feminine over looking professional. Stick closer to your comfort zone in this case... looking more feminine will not help you get the job and you are dressing to get the job.

I hope that helps... good luck!

People say I look professional  :D

(https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3676/13324117673_96eff4e930_o.jpg)

barbie~~

My standard interview attire is:
*Pencil Skirt to just above the knee
*Blouse
*Cardigan over the blouse. (Suit coats are generally too dressy for the jobs I'm going for)
*Sensible heel
*Necklace or scarf
*Enough makeup to make it look like I'm wearing none at all.

I always go in assuming my past will be guessed, if not known by my potential employer beforehand. That brings me to, it is entirely possible that the people across the table from you are going to be on edge because they're afraid of screwing up. I say this because a former interviewer of mine once confided in me, "Yeah, HR told us not to say anything that'll get us sued." I know as I approached and went through transition I was nervous about being discriminated against. I never thought until recently what the cis folk on the other side of the table could be dealing with. So while obviously you shouldn't take any crap from anyone, being cool and confident in who you are, demonstrating that yeah, you're trans but it isn't going to impact your ability to do your job, might be key to making your interviewer think, "Yeah, I want to spend n hours a week with this person."

Good luck!

Quote from: barbie on March 22, 2014, 11:14:40 PM
People say I look professional  :D

(https://farm4.staticflickr.com/3676/13324117673_96eff4e930_o.jpg)

barbie~~

The skirt is too short for a job interview.

I've been doing my own research in preparation for upcoming job interviews. And so far, from what I've seen, basically interview attire in most professional environments is just about keeping it simple and clean. Simple color palettes, minimal tasteful accessories, minimal makeup, and usually either dress pants or a pencil skirt on the bottom, with either good-quality loafers, dress flats, or heels depending on how professional the interview is. (If it's very professional, you'd lean toward heels, and would probably want a blazer too.)

Female interview attire is MUCH more flexible. There is no universal "dress shirt and tie" for women. Anything on top that looks clean, polished, and not too distracting is usually acceptable. Because the way you "dress up" or "dress down" women's clothes is usually based on your choice in pants/skirts, shoes, and your choice in accessories, rather than with a tie or anything. The same outfit can either look casual with a pair of jeans and big colorful accessories, or dressy with a pair of suit pants, heels, and quality gold/silver accessories.

Look up some articles on how to dress up or dress down outfits, and that should give you a good idea of it. (That's where I've been looking at least... basically just studying what makes an outfit looks more professional versus more casual. And again, the theme seems to be simple, clean, professional. Simple clear "ideas" rather than big flashy colorful "ideas" that draw too much attention.)

Quote from: mac1 on March 23, 2014, 10:56:07 PM
The skirt is too short for a job interview.

Yes. I agree. Longer skirt would be better. Today my friend mentioned chanel-line skirt after watching my wearing mini-skirt. Most of skirts I have are mini. If I will get an interview, then I will purchase a longer, black skirt.

barbie~~

Quote from: mac1
The skirt is too short for a job interview.

Quote from: barbie on March 24, 2014, 12:11:28 AM
Yes. I agree. Longer skirt would be better. Today my friend mentioned chanel-line skirt after watching my wearing mini-skirt. Most of skirts I have are mini. If I will get an interview, then I will purchase a longer, black skirt.

barbie~~

Don't get me wrong. I like the look of mini skirts on women but it is not appropriate for a job interview.

Thanks everyone. I actually found out that the company I'm interviewing for has their dress code posted online, complete with pictures of examples of do's and don's. So, I'm using that as guidelines for how to dress for the interview.

Now I just need to figure out the best way to style my hair. Its an kind of an awkward length at the moment, and most styles just look masculine, or emphasize masculine features of my face. But I have a few days to pay around with it and get it figured out, so I'm sure I'll be okay.

Quote from: No Reflection on March 22, 2014, 08:26:18 PMHonestly my biggest worry would be using something other than a legal name & gender on your app.  Not sure if that could be a problem or not in the hiring process...  I normally just use all my legal identifiers on any kind of paperwork.

She (the OP) hasn't said whether or not she's legally changed her name yet, but if she has then what you said is a moot point. If it's in the U.S. they shouldn't be asking for her gender (unless it's one of those exceptions to the rule on what they can and can't ask you) at this point - other than asking for Mr./Ms. (which is not legally binding to your gender, but just a courtesy request) or on an EOE survey (which once again I don't think is legally binding, but you have the option to opt-out of part or all of the survey).

Quote from: tgchar21 on March 24, 2014, 04:38:50 PM
She (the OP) hasn't said whether or not she's legally changed her name yet, but if she has then what you said is a moot point. If it's in the U.S. they shouldn't be asking for her gender (unless it's one of those exceptions to the rule on what they can and can't ask you) at this point - other than asking for Mr./Ms. (which is not legally binding to your gender, but just a courtesy request) or on an EOE survey (which once again I don't think is legally binding, but you have the option to opt-out of part or all of the survey).

My name hasn't yet been legally changed. But the application didn't specify legal name. Soo... I dunno. We shall see. Better than giving then my very male name and then showing up femmes out.

Quote from: No Reflection on March 24, 2014, 10:22:53 PM
Not sure exactly what size you are on your upper half, but I have some various drapey wraps, cardis, & other knitted 3rd pieces, mostly medium or small.  (Some greys/heathers, nothing black...)  I don't know if that kind of thing is considered appropriate professional-wear or not, but the right one can go a long way towards making you look complete at least.

Most of my accessories are too shiny and/or fun.  I do have a nice string of pearls that might look professional with some pearl earrings... you know, clean and classy, not too loud...  They're definitely one of my tamer pieces but I don't have any earrings that have any kind of synergy with them, maybe you do.  If not I'm sure Claire's has a cheap fix...  :laugh:

Thanks, but, at least as far as the interview goes, I'm set. Ended up getting a nice fitted black blazer to go over a simple grey top, and I got some black slacks, which don't look too mannish on me, and a simple black skirt and opaque black stockings. Which one I wear depends on how effin cold it is that day. If I wear the slacks I have some black suede heeled boots that go well with it, and if I end up in a skirt I'm going with black ballet flats.

Thanks for offering up clothing, but, sadly, I'm MUCH bigger than you  :-\ Prior to starting hormones I could consistently wear a size 6 or 8... Now its 10 if I'm very lucky, but, 12-14 more typically. Sigh. I'm such a fat cow  :(

I have some pearl studs, and some small silver hoops with pearls on them, so I might take you up on the necklace. Otherwise I figure I'll just wear my silver heart pendant, which, I dunno. It's tasteful, but its so obviously "Hey, you got that ->-bleeped-<- at walmart for $2.50", especially given the quality of jewelry Macy's sells.

So the last thing to figure out is WTF to do with my hair... I got some color to touch up the roots, since that looks BLEH at my hairline. But beyond that not sure what to do. I don't really wanna rock the headband. I mean, the ensemble I put together actually looks really classy, and I think the headband would just detract from that... I dunno. I guess tomorrow is my "play with hair" day, and just style the hell out of my hair and see if I can stumble across something that works with the length I have.

Quote from: No Reflection on March 25, 2014, 12:35:55 AM
You'd be surprised... it's really just a price tag.  I've bought some relatively pricey costume pieces from Macy's, and had the rocks fall out of them on the first wear.

The pendant itself could pass muster. Its the chain that looks hideously cheap.

Quote from: No Reflection on March 25, 2014, 12:35:55 AM
If only it were that easy with other things.  Ahem...

Tee Hee!  ;D You gave me a needed laugh, and, also, I agree.

Quote from: No Reflection on March 25, 2014, 12:35:55 AM
anyway, I've had better luck at Penney's for stuff like that.  You still have to watch out with some of the finer pieces though.  I was looking at this huge chunky amethyst, or pink sapphire thing.  I forget what the stone was now.  It was stupid huge.  A real sassy, way-over-the-top statement piece.  Think Cruella Deville.  Totally senseless and indiscriminate.  I'd wear it without a second thought.  Anyway it was gorgeous, and I almost caved... but I picked up on a noticable slant in the setting of the gem.  Kinda turned me off.  But it was gorgeous.

I need to buy me some amethyst pieces... It is my birthstone afterall, and I have zero pieces with it... I dunno. As a boy I never cared for the color, but, I dunno. I'm finding its growing on me, and also, I feel like it'd look good on me. *shrug* One more thing to add to the wish list, I guess. I will admit you have great taste in jewelry. The stuff you wear really works well for you.

Quote from: No Reflection on March 25, 2014, 12:35:55 AM
I don't think you are fat...

That's really sweet of you to say. But I bet you a handmade skirt that you couldn't wrap your arms around me if you tried. In fact, I dare you to try!  :P

Quote from: No Reflection on March 25, 2014, 12:35:55 AM
but it's been a rough winter, and I think most people have put on some pounds from the inactivity. 

This is true... I normally like to get out and do a hike or something at least once a week. That hasn't happened since November. Also, being unemployed has caused me to be even more sedate than normal. Plus, I've had a lot of emotionally triggering ->-bleeped-<- going on lately, and, well, I've been eating away the pain. Sigh.

Quote from: No Reflection on March 25, 2014, 12:35:55 AM
Wait til summer rolls around and there will be plenty of opportunity for getting in shape.  I was just at dress barn today and bought a dress in size 6, which surprised me a little, because I have fit into 4's in the past.  I'm about the lightest I've been since high school.  And I will still probably benefit from a tummy cincher or something so no one thinks I'm bloated or preggo.  I haven't gained any weight (or anything else for that matter...) on HRT, so who knows.  I guess I could've tried on a 4 but they didn't even have many things in 6 as it was and the 6 is probably just fine.  The sizes are just a number, and as long as they make your number I say you're good.  :laugh:

I hate you so much!  ;D With your skinnyness, and your tiny hands, and your tiny feet. You get to wear all the cute ->-bleeped-<-... I'll admit it, I'm jealous. What of it? Even my ex, who probably topped out at 120, weren't no size 4...

I don't think you could look bloated or preggers if you tried, unless you went out and got yourself a fat suit.   :laugh:

Quote from: No Reflection on March 25, 2014, 12:35:55 AM
As for your hair, how about just doing your trademark headband thing with one that blends in with your hair color?  I think it looks plenty fem and it wouldn't stick out that much if it's thin and similar to your hair color.

I dunno. The headband thing works great for me for casual every day use... But, I dunno. I just don't feel like it sort of matches the elegance of the rest of the ensemble. Granted, it is a great fallback option, should I not be able to come up with anything else. I mean, it does certainly keep my hair from flopping into its natural part, which makes me look VERY masculine. But, I'll keep futzing with it for a while. I have time, so, may as well.