Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I am happy the weather is breaking but because the summer is coming, I guess I'm not happy because I can't enjoy myself, Its gonna be to hot with binder on and I can't go swimming or to the beaches and pools shirthless or nything its starting to fustrate me because th weather is getting less cold and everyonelse seems to be getting happy about it because it means less clothes and summer bodies :-\

I feel you. Summer is the worst! I feel like I can't enjoy it like most of my friends do. They go swimming and walk around with no shirts or nice tanktops. I live next to the ocean and it's so frustrating when my family and friends go swimming. The worst part is that you have to wear thin, revealing clothes. Ugh.

But still it's a part of transitioning, and I have to transition. You just have to deal with wearing a sweaty binder if you want a flat chest. The best thing is to accept that there are some things you may not be able to do right now, but there still is a lot of other great stuff you can enjoy!

Quote from: Carbonated on April 08, 2014, 04:37:38 PM
I feel you. Summer is the worst! I feel like I can't enjoy it like most of my friends do. They go swimming and walk around with no shirts or nice tanktops. I live next to the ocean and it's so frustrating when my family and friends go swimming. The worst part is that you have to wear thin, revealing clothes. Ugh.

But still it's a part of transitioning, and I have to transition. You just have to deal with wearing a sweaty binder if you want a flat chest. The best thing is to accept that there are some things you may not be able to do right now, but there still is a lot of other great stuff you can enjoy!

Don't feel like its summer time theres not much else I can do when its gonna be to hot, I'm tired oof not being able to enjoy myself. Even for spring break it pissed me off because everyone went to pcb in florida and posted pics, How can I enjoy myself theres nothing really.

you'll just have to enjoy your summer like others do who aren't happy with their body. whether it's because of insecurities or because they're over weight and don't like to show off their body. people go swimming with tops on, etc. there's ways around it but yeah it does suck when you can't enjoy it like others can because you're more focused on your body than anything else.

Quote from: invisiblemonsters on April 08, 2014, 05:12:11 PM
you'll just have to enjoy your summer like others do who aren't happy with their body. whether it's because of insecurities or because they're over weight and don't like to show off their body. people go swimming with tops on, etc. there's ways around it but yeah it does suck when you can't enjoy it like others can because you're more focused on your body than anything else.

Don't know if I can do that and I hate swimming with tops on, So I just choose not to swim

Summer sucks for me too, not having had top surgery, but my whole life has been like a summer of sucks because I've always been self-conscious about my weight and my body in general (even before I realized I was trans).  I try to just push through it and not focus on the uncomfortable feelings of being sweaty and in a binder.  I also try to remind myself that I'm not the only one with body image issues, and even the non-trans people around me have their own body image stuff to deal with.  I'll still go swimming with my friends (though I don't really swim, just float and enjoy the water), and enjoy that time I spend with them, because when I look at it, they aren't focused on what I'm wearing or what I look like, but rather the insane jumps my friend's sons like to do into the water, or laughing at a joke.  It also helps that I focus on surrounding myself with people who I know accept and care about me and knowing that they don't view me in a judging manner, though it is hard being around three shirtless teen boys who have something I want very much. 

I mean I don't really swim anymore to uncomfortable with it, I don't really enjoy summer period because every year I get. More and more uncomfortable.

Gotta suck it up, I didn't swim for six years.

I can relate, haven't been true swimming in seven years. The only time I got to enjoy the water was a couple years ago on a family trip to the ocean and that was with binder, shirt and shorts. Summer is rolling on again and now friends are talking about swimming (they don't know) and I'm just like "Okay, how best can I say I can't go swimming?" since they know I can.

Quote from: Alexthecat on April 08, 2014, 06:05:44 PM
Gotta suck it up, I didn't swim for six years.

As someone who practically grew up in the ocean that is unimaginable to me!  I guess maybe growing up with beach culture made me less weary about things like wearing a shirt in the water, or at least got me comfortable with it faster.  What I hated was the girls suits.  Luckily board shorts over a one piece was a pretty common style near me.  I just wore board shorts and a rash guard over my other bathing suit (Kind of redundant I guess) from like probably 2nd grade on.  It worked for me.  Then I got surgery, and don't have to worry about that at all.  Board shorts and boxers is all I wear, but I certainly didn't let not having had surgery yet ruin my swimming fun!  If anything being in the water is better than being out of it.  Just keep your body underwater and no one can tell what it looks like!

Summer doesn't have to suck! 

Quote from: GnomeKid on April 08, 2014, 06:29:34 PM
As someone who practically grew up in the ocean that is unimaginable to me!  I guess maybe growing up with beach culture made me less weary about things like wearing a shirt in the water, or at least got me comfortable with it faster.  What I hated was the girls suits.  Luckily board shorts over a one piece was a pretty common style near me.  I just wore board shorts and a rash guard over my other bathing suit (Kind of redundant I guess) from like probably 2nd grade on.  It worked for me.  Then I got surgery, and don't have to worry about that at all.  Board shorts and boxers is all I wear, but I certainly didn't let not having had surgery yet ruin my swimming fun!  If anything being in the water is better than being out of it.  Just keep your body underwater and no one can tell what it looks like!

Summer doesn't have to suck!

This is really good advice to go by.. as dreadful summer approaches, I just *might* be able to muster the courage to wear a rash guard and trunks instead of a humiliating bathing suit. I haven't swum in a couple of years, and it's so fun yet hard to balance out with my dysphoria.. self-confidence goes a long way, so I'm gonna try my best to just be myself and not care what others think.

Quote from: Maleth on April 08, 2014, 07:12:05 PM
This is really good advice to go by.. as dreadful summer approaches, I just *might* be able to muster the courage to wear a rash guard and trunks instead of a humiliating bathing suit. I haven't swum in a couple of years, and it's so fun yet hard to balance out with my dysphoria.. self-confidence goes a long way, so I'm gonna try my best to just be myself and not care what others think.

This is what I have always done.  I would wear a swimsuit competition type athletic swim top (the top of a two piece swim suit), with a men's LOOSE FIT sleeveless rash guard over it, with board shorts.

It you get some sort of sports/competition swim suit top it will flatten you enough that when you pair that with a loose sleeveless rash guard, you really can't see your chest.  Check this out:

http://www.rashguardshirtco.com/category/men-rash-guards-sleeveless-loose-fit.html

You don't want to get a regular tight rash guard because it will show the form of your chest, that is why you want loose fit only.

If you aren't a fan of rash guards or putting out that kind of money, you can just get a cheap sleeveless cotton muscle t-shirt (the one with the small arm holes).  By wearing a muscle shirt (unlike a regular men's tank), no one will see that you have a bathing suit top on under the shirt. 

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0049BMHD4/ref=twister_B0049BAR0O

So, tight swim suit top, loose muscle t-shirt over that.  And any cool ass board shorts you want!

I have a place at the beach and this is how I have survived the last 11 years prior to top surgery.  Definitely doable.

Quote from: GnomeKid on April 08, 2014, 06:29:34 PM
As someone who practically grew up in the ocean that is unimaginable to me!  I guess maybe growing up with beach culture made me less weary about things like wearing a shirt in the water, or at least got me comfortable with it faster.  What I hated was the girls suits.  Luckily board shorts over a one piece was a pretty common style near me.  I just wore board shorts and a rash guard over my other bathing suit (Kind of redundant I guess) from like probably 2nd grade on.  It worked for me.  Then I got surgery, and don't have to worry about that at all.  Board shorts and boxers is all I wear, but I certainly didn't let not having had surgery yet ruin my swimming fun!  If anything being in the water is better than being out of it.  Just keep your body underwater and no one can tell what it looks like!

Summer doesn't have to suck!

I'm good, I don't wanna its not comfortable, I've swam with shirts on I don't like it

I can't wait to swim without a shirt on. It may be the first thing I do when I get surgery.

I kinda like summer. I can let my hairy legs out and sweat. Those kinda lessen my dysphoria.

Underworks sells an awesome swimwear shirt. Looks like a rash guard. Binds really well for me. I'm excited about being able to go to the beach with it and board shorts.

Quote from: Charliedogist on April 08, 2014, 11:14:22 PM
Underworks sells an awesome swimwear shirt. Looks like a rash guard. Binds really well for me. I'm excited about being able to go to the beach with it and board shorts.

Well thats good that you found something that works well for you but I'm just not gonna bother with swimming.....tbh

Yeah, I feel you. I was basically forced last year to wear female swimwear around my SO's family (not out to them, never coming out to them) and it was an okay time if I kept my shirt on, but then they got all uppity about why I had my shirt on at the beach, so yeah, I feel you. I ended up wearing a shirt half the time and the other half I just basically lied and said I was protecting my back tattoo (it takes up my whole back) from too much sun (even though I've had it for years and it's all black, sunscreen on it would have worked just fine) and they accepted the shirt after that for the most part.

The bad part is most waterparks and swimming pools I go to won't allow t-shirts, but rash guards you can wear, so I ordered the swimwear one from underworks. I haven't had any issues at the heated pool down the street wearing it, and I can wear it into the showers in the mens room, change in the shower stall to my velcro binder and no one's the wiser.

I enjoy swimming and the beach too much to not go, so I basically forced myself to deal with it, and my SO is supportive so when I needed to escape them last summer we would just go on a walk down the beach and ignore them. :p

Quote from: Charliedogist on April 09, 2014, 01:06:10 AM
Yeah, I feel you. I was basically forced last year to wear female swimwear around my SO's family (not out to them, never coming out to them) and it was an okay time if I kept my shirt on, but then they got all uppity about why I had my shirt on at the beach, so yeah, I feel you. I ended up wearing a shirt half the time and the other half I just basically lied and said I was protecting my back tattoo (it takes up my whole back) from too much sun (even though I've had it for years and it's all black, sunscreen on it would have worked just fine) and they accepted the shirt after that for the most part.

The bad part is most waterparks and swimming pools I go to won't allow t-shirts, but rash guards you can wear, so I ordered the swimwear one from underworks. I haven't had any issues at the heated pool down the street wearing it, and I can wear it into the showers in the mens room, change in the shower stall to my velcro binder and no one's the wiser.

I enjoy swimming and the beach too much to not go, so I basically forced myself to deal with it, and my SO is supportive so when I needed to escape them last summer we would just go on a walk down the beach and ignore them. :p

Yea I feel you I'm out to mine but they don't support me and act like it don't exist so yea.....

I hear you there bro, I have basically been like a cat ever since I came out, I've been avoiding water like the plague. No pools, no beaches, nothing, nada but showers. I'm kinda fine with it since I never really liked swimming, but I do like to have fun with my friends, and I definitely don't wanna miss out on a water park adventure if I can handle it ):

And I'm really hesitant about rash guards because I have a really big chest, so I rather wait until I can find someone to do surgery, even if I have to go out of state.

I know it sucks, but I say that would b a great time to get a summer job so you can start saving for top surgery.  I know you're young, but it would still be a good idea to have yourself a small fund going if you can.  That way, by the time you turn 18, you may have part, if not half of the costs saved up by then. 

I feel you,man. I live where it gets unbearably hot and swimming is just about the only thing you can do while staying cool. My advice is to purchase a swim binder with good reviews and not over-exert yourself when engaging in physical activity.

I hear ya man. I haven't gone swimming for oh 10 years or so for that reason. I can understand that you don't like wearing the t-shirt or top. It sucks that it'll be that way till you can get surgery. Personally, I'll probably go ahead and get something so I can swim this year. I miss it too much. I gotta say I'm looking forward to wearing shorts this year - let my manly leg hair flow in the summer breeze haha. The best I can do is wait things out till I can get top surgery - that can't come soon enough. Hang in there bro, it's a tough ride but we're here for ya.

Quote from: Malachite on April 09, 2014, 12:23:13 PM
I know it sucks, but I say that would b a great time to get a summer job so you can start saving for top surgery.  I know you're young, but it would still be a good idea to have yourself a small fund going if you can.  That way, by the time you turn 18, you may have part, if not half of the costs saved up by then.

I'm already going to get a Job but not just because of surgery, But because I need to provide for myself. But. I'm just starting not care about anything anymore, I really wanna give up I'm to depressed.

Quote from: connorism on April 09, 2014, 12:36:14 PM
I feel you,man. I live where it gets unbearably hot and swimming is just about the only thing you can do while staying cool. My advice is to purchase a swim binder with good reviews and not over-exert yourself when engaging in physical activity.

I already said I don't wanna purchase one if it works for you cool but I'm not feeling that tbh.

Quote from: Brandon on April 09, 2014, 01:31:03 PM
I'm already going to get a Job but not just because of surgery, But because I need to provide for myself. But. I'm just starting not care about anything anymore, I really wanna give up I'm to depressed.

That's good!  Let that job be your motivation to continue.

Why do you get so snippy at people who are trying to offer you support and advice?

Quote from: Kyler on April 09, 2014, 01:38:22 PM
Why do you get so snippy at people who are trying to offer you support and advice?

I'm not you just don't understand I have no support so I can't o everything you guys suggest, But again you don't get that, Please don't get on my case either I'm not happy at all and havn't had a good week. Depression and dysphoria is weighing me down.