Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hooray for going to a girls' school
Once upon a time they did not specifically state that we must wear white DRESSES to graduation. Then one year one girl wore pants. It was a big deal. They didn't like it. BUT I did not think they changed their dress code over it. I was wrong.
I just found out I have to wear a dress to my graduation. I was avoiding trying on the one my grandma wants me to wear in hopes that I could wear khakis and a white shirt or something like that. But no. They specifically say it must be a white DRESS. They changed their dress code after that one person. Ugh.
I'm getting super upset thinking about this now, I don't think I can handle putting on that stupid thing on graduation day. I don't normally get badly upset about trans-related things, but when it comes to having to wear dresses, I just really can't deal with it. I'd honestly rather show up in pants and be told I can't walk than go in a dress, but no way in hell are my parents going to let that happen.

I know there's not even anything I can really do about this... But ugh I just needed to rant.

Hmm...well there is an option to not go? In my school we don't have to attend graduation they will just send it in the mail. ie i'm not having one anyways since im graduating in the middle of the year..not sure how private schools work

If I was in your situation, I would do exactly this:
Wear the dress...
                                     
  with pants.

I'm with you there. I hate wearing dresses and a friend wants me to be part of her wedding (which i have to wear a dress for)
I'm not out yet but I seriously don't want to wear a dress (Even worse Heels too) I rather not wear the dress and wear a tux or something.
Hopefully I can change after and be in something more comfortable.

Quote from: makipu on April 12, 2014, 03:49:10 PM
If I was in your situation, I would do exactly this:
Wear the dress...
                                     
  with pants.

Haha thanks for giving me a laugh about this :) that'd sure be interesting!

@skylar- honestly I don't know. But it would be VERY weird if I didn't go. Everyone goes. I don't think it's because it's required but I'm not sure.

Quote from: makipu on April 12, 2014, 03:49:10 PM
If I was in your situation, I would do exactly this:
Wear the dress...
                                     
  with pants.

Yes! Do this. 

Quote from: makipu on April 12, 2014, 03:49:10 PM
If I was in your situation, I would do exactly this:
Wear the dress...
                                     
  with pants.

THIS!!! I agree with the above, 100%

If you want to go to the graduation and YOU HAVE TO WEAR THE DRESS, (that is rhetorical I know you do. ) Can you get away with shorts underneath I'm assuming pants won't work with the shoes for dress.
Also is there an after party something for the bonfire later (the amount of uniforms in ours was staggering)

If you don't want to go to the graduation don't have to library start looking up exotic disease even something stress related might be enough to convince yourself your parents

Thanks for all the replies guys, I'll see about wearing shorts underneath to help me.
Any advice concerning bras or anything? I'm not sure I have anymore that fit, other than sports bras, which aren't very dress-friendly.

I apologies if my last post appears flippant I started traveling interstate by myself at 14 so my parents knew they could only guide me.  The only thing they where not supportive of was my wish to change my gender.  Let them know how you feel stick to your guns don't back down. If they're as supportive as you said I'm sure they would understand you just both might need to meet in the middle.

Good luck

Honestly, I feel your pain, brother. I am attending a single-sexed school at the moment and it makes me extremely restless and angry that I have to put off my transition another four years because of it.. let me know what you eventually decide to do, since it'll give me ideas for my own graduation.. It seems like it's the same case in my own school because when I look at the graduation photos, all of the people are wearing white dresses. It's really frustrating but oh well.. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

Quote from: Maleth on April 12, 2014, 07:43:49 PM
Honestly, I feel your pain, brother. I am attending a single-sexed school at the moment and it makes me extremely restless and angry that I have to put off my transition another four years because of it.. let me know what you eventually decide to do, since it'll give me ideas for my own graduation.. It seems like it's the same case in my own school because when I look at the graduation photos, all of the people are wearing white dresses. It's really frustrating but oh well.. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you!

I'm leaning towards the wear-shorts-underneath idea. It'll make me feel a little better at the very least. I'll try and remember to let you know what I decide!

Quote from: immortal gypsy on April 12, 2014, 07:04:54 PM
I apologies if my last post appears flippant I started traveling interstate by myself at 14 so my parents knew they could only guide me.  The only thing they where not supportive of was my wish to change my gender.  Let them know how you feel stick to your guns don't back down. If they're as supportive as you said I'm sure they would understand you just both might need to meet in the middle.

Good luck

No man, you didn't seem flippant, I'm just not so good with replying to people. It's hard for me to think of something worthwhile to say sometimes. I'm liking the idea of wearing shorts underneath.

Congratulations on graduating

Be a rebel and wear pants underneath. Then when you start to cross the stage rip away the dress and go HAHA.

Hmm maybe you can get away with wearing a really long tunic style white shirt and longish white shorts under it hah. Long enough to be considered a "dress".

Though I also like Alex's rip the dress off idea a lot lol.

There's a kid I know in my city (he got national publicity last year) who graduated at a coed Catholic school. He was an excellent student. They had the boys wear black and the girls white and he wanted to wear a black rope. For awhile we had the idea he should wear a black rope under the white one. The school would not relent, even with national focus. He chose not to walk on graduation. But if he had at least it wouldn't have been a dress. I like the pants idea. :)

This tells about him (last year):
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/20/damian-garcia-transgender_n_3307489.html

--Jay

imagine having to wear a white dress as the school uniform everyday 13 years straight! i know the pain man. i mean, why do the girls schools hate pants so much? what's the big deal with dresses and skirts? at least i'm done with regular schooling now, we only have to go to school if we want to cover missed lessons or practicals until final exams in august. that relieves some of the pain but after the exams i'll have to go to school for different reasons: leaving certificate, result sheet, character certificate etc. and the dress code for students who have left school is NO PANTS! i'm planning on wearing a tunic style shirt with pants so i'll have good logic if someone tries to turn me away. and we have 'the social' which is the equivalent of prom, or homecoming as you may call it, and the prize giving ceremony of year 13, to whick it is compulsory to wear a SAREE! (pls google if you dont know) i've thought of the ripping up idea for them myself. well, i guess that's another rant, sorry i wasn't being helpful.

Oh middle eastern? That explains a lot, they old fashioned.

 :DI suggested pants to at least get your point across while following their rules of wearing the dress.  How long is the dress by the way?  If you're planning with shorts maybe boxers will do?