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Title: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Trudi on June 03, 2014, 09:07:39 PM
Post by: Trudi on June 03, 2014, 09:07:39 PM
Hello world, I am Trudi!
Now I have that out of the way let me first say thank you to the owner of this site for providing a refuge for newly transitioning people.
Now to my story... I have never truly been happy in my own skin ever since I was a child. While yes I was out doing some of the normal things a young boy would do (for example riding snow-mobiles or hiking) I never had an interest in things like sports or trading collector cards. I preferred to be either on my own or helping out around the house.
Later on (I was about eight) my best friend & I snuck into a neighbours barn and he had a paper bag with him (during the mid 70's). He reached in and pulled out some of his sister's panties. He said let's try them on, oh my! I loved the feeling of the soft cotton on my skin. I never had much opportunity to do anything like that for a number of years as the house always had someone home. It was not until my teens I could do anything like that, and to experiment further. I would sneak in and pilfer some of my younger sister's clothes and at night wear them while I was walking up to the local park. I was free for those short times.
Once I was an adult I would wait until my partners were out and get dressed, by this time I had been married (twice and fathered 2 children to the first wife) and growing ever more frustrated that I could not be who I really was. My own family's expectations were to fit this exterior, but inside I was crying my heart out! My most recent relationship of 3.5 years I finally got up the courage to tell her my secret, I do love her but she could not be in an intimate relationship with me in that way although she would help me through my transition. I cried for the point of losing her as my partner but also for the love she has for me as a good friend.
A very short time after that she had asked that I find a place to live as soon as possible, I was very fortunate to find a very accepting family not too far away who do not question when I am home dressed as who I truly yearn to be.
Now a few days ago I plucked up enough courage to tell my elder sister my secret.. before that I have a small story to tell, after the split of my second marriage I went back to Canada for a short time and while I was there I was informed that my brother-in-law is now my sister-in-law! I commented "Now that is a coincidence"... ok, back to my sister. My sister invited me over for dinner and we started chatting about work and other small talk. My nephew was hoping I would come over and help with choosing computer parts for a system he wants to build (I have worked in IT for many years). We had gone through the process and then my sister was preparing dinner and she suggested we have a glass of wine each, so I did the honours. After I handed her the glass we moved into the living room and I remarked that when I heard the point of my new sister-in-law I thought it coincidental. My sister retorted "how come?" I said that I have been trans since I was very young. It stunned her! Again I have had to put on this facade of being male for over 40 years, now I have a chance to be me.
I have to tell my own children before I broadcast it, which I fully intended to do. In fact I have an appointment on the 16th of June with a well respected physician in the local trans community to see about starting on hormones.
So... Hello world, I am Trudi!
Now I have that out of the way let me first say thank you to the owner of this site for providing a refuge for newly transitioning people.
Now to my story... I have never truly been happy in my own skin ever since I was a child. While yes I was out doing some of the normal things a young boy would do (for example riding snow-mobiles or hiking) I never had an interest in things like sports or trading collector cards. I preferred to be either on my own or helping out around the house.
Later on (I was about eight) my best friend & I snuck into a neighbours barn and he had a paper bag with him (during the mid 70's). He reached in and pulled out some of his sister's panties. He said let's try them on, oh my! I loved the feeling of the soft cotton on my skin. I never had much opportunity to do anything like that for a number of years as the house always had someone home. It was not until my teens I could do anything like that, and to experiment further. I would sneak in and pilfer some of my younger sister's clothes and at night wear them while I was walking up to the local park. I was free for those short times.
Once I was an adult I would wait until my partners were out and get dressed, by this time I had been married (twice and fathered 2 children to the first wife) and growing ever more frustrated that I could not be who I really was. My own family's expectations were to fit this exterior, but inside I was crying my heart out! My most recent relationship of 3.5 years I finally got up the courage to tell her my secret, I do love her but she could not be in an intimate relationship with me in that way although she would help me through my transition. I cried for the point of losing her as my partner but also for the love she has for me as a good friend.
A very short time after that she had asked that I find a place to live as soon as possible, I was very fortunate to find a very accepting family not too far away who do not question when I am home dressed as who I truly yearn to be.
Now a few days ago I plucked up enough courage to tell my elder sister my secret.. before that I have a small story to tell, after the split of my second marriage I went back to Canada for a short time and while I was there I was informed that my brother-in-law is now my sister-in-law! I commented "Now that is a coincidence"... ok, back to my sister. My sister invited me over for dinner and we started chatting about work and other small talk. My nephew was hoping I would come over and help with choosing computer parts for a system he wants to build (I have worked in IT for many years). We had gone through the process and then my sister was preparing dinner and she suggested we have a glass of wine each, so I did the honours. After I handed her the glass we moved into the living room and I remarked that when I heard the point of my new sister-in-law I thought it coincidental. My sister retorted "how come?" I said that I have been trans since I was very young. It stunned her! Again I have had to put on this facade of being male for over 40 years, now I have a chance to be me.
I have to tell my own children before I broadcast it, which I fully intended to do. In fact I have an appointment on the 16th of June with a well respected physician in the local trans community to see about starting on hormones.
So... Hello world, I am Trudi!
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: svaso on June 03, 2014, 09:14:21 PM
Post by: svaso on June 03, 2014, 09:14:21 PM
This was a beautiful post Trudi! I also came out at 40. It certainly is a breath of fresh air. Now it's time to get on with your life! Congratulations!
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: fusstangtroy on June 03, 2014, 09:34:30 PM
Post by: fusstangtroy on June 03, 2014, 09:34:30 PM
Hello Trudi ..great story and its only the beginning for your journey ... I guess that could make me the older gal ( thats cool but i don,t act my age ).This great place to get up to speed and get good info..Have wonderful week .AKA Sara
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Trudi on June 03, 2014, 09:45:40 PM
Post by: Trudi on June 03, 2014, 09:45:40 PM
Thank you ladies, I am taking it day to day at the moment. I am actually meeting with some of the Seahorse Queensland members this evening for coffee, mainly to network & also to get some tips! :-*
I am overwhelmed by the response to those I have told, gets me a little teary thinking about it.
Hugs!
Trudi
I am overwhelmed by the response to those I have told, gets me a little teary thinking about it.
Hugs!
Trudi
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Goldfish on June 03, 2014, 10:54:44 PM
Post by: Goldfish on June 03, 2014, 10:54:44 PM
Hello
Welcome
Really happy that things are going well. It's always helpful and great support to have at least some family members on side. Sounds like you're off to a good start, so see you around :)
Naomi
Welcome
Really happy that things are going well. It's always helpful and great support to have at least some family members on side. Sounds like you're off to a good start, so see you around :)
Naomi
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: LordKAT on June 04, 2014, 01:37:48 AM
Post by: LordKAT on June 04, 2014, 01:37:48 AM
Hi Trudi, welcome to Susan's.
I'm glad you found this site and think you will make many new friends. There is a wealth of information here.
Here are some rules and answers to often asked questions.
I'm glad you found this site and think you will make many new friends. There is a wealth of information here.
Here are some rules and answers to often asked questions.
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
- Age and the Forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,62197.msg405545.html#msg405545)
- Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
- Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: antonia on June 04, 2014, 07:01:00 AM
Post by: antonia on June 04, 2014, 07:01:00 AM
Welcome Trudi
Seems like you got most of your ducks in a row and got the environment where you can transition. From what I gather you also have support from family/friends which I'm sure will make your transition much easier.
We're all happy you joined our ranks and look forward to getting updates and insights.
Hugs
Seems like you got most of your ducks in a row and got the environment where you can transition. From what I gather you also have support from family/friends which I'm sure will make your transition much easier.
We're all happy you joined our ranks and look forward to getting updates and insights.
Hugs
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 04, 2014, 08:55:05 AM
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 04, 2014, 08:55:05 AM
Hi Trudi
Welcome, welcome and welcome! This is a great place for intelligent conversation and advice, the occasional lightning-bolt of bitchiness, and perhaps a good recipe when you're stuck for ideas :D
I'm over 40, and it's never to late. GOOD LUCK! But be sure to realise that you make a lot of that luck yourself!
Hugs
Julia
Welcome, welcome and welcome! This is a great place for intelligent conversation and advice, the occasional lightning-bolt of bitchiness, and perhaps a good recipe when you're stuck for ideas :D
I'm over 40, and it's never to late. GOOD LUCK! But be sure to realise that you make a lot of that luck yourself!
Hugs
Julia
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Trudi on June 04, 2014, 04:35:51 PM
Post by: Trudi on June 04, 2014, 04:35:51 PM
Hello ladies! :)
Thank you for a warm welcome, I have to say last night was interesting. I met with a number of ladies from Seahorse Queensland at 'The Coffee Club' in West End Brisbane, I even went as my true self... absolutely liberating! I was worried that my make-up job was going to be a point of laughter but one of the comments after I told them this was my first time out was "...you did very well!"
The secretary of the group Bernie, as soon as she found out what work I do was asking how she could accomplish something (namely removing malware from her computer). Of course being the kind soul I am I explained as simply as I could but it still went over her head. I do not blame her for this by any means but considering I have been in the industry (IT) for many many years and suppose that sometimes forget that most people are not.
One of the women there I am sure I have met while I was working, just cannot put my finger on it.
Well as the evening drew to a close I had been visited by pretty much most of the group and I was getting a warm glow inside. I feel life is going to get better from here on in.
Toodles!
Thank you for a warm welcome, I have to say last night was interesting. I met with a number of ladies from Seahorse Queensland at 'The Coffee Club' in West End Brisbane, I even went as my true self... absolutely liberating! I was worried that my make-up job was going to be a point of laughter but one of the comments after I told them this was my first time out was "...you did very well!"
The secretary of the group Bernie, as soon as she found out what work I do was asking how she could accomplish something (namely removing malware from her computer). Of course being the kind soul I am I explained as simply as I could but it still went over her head. I do not blame her for this by any means but considering I have been in the industry (IT) for many many years and suppose that sometimes forget that most people are not.
One of the women there I am sure I have met while I was working, just cannot put my finger on it.
Well as the evening drew to a close I had been visited by pretty much most of the group and I was getting a warm glow inside. I feel life is going to get better from here on in.
Toodles!
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Trudi on June 05, 2014, 08:02:27 PM
Post by: Trudi on June 05, 2014, 08:02:27 PM
Hello girls!
I just remembered something from Wednesday night, one of the ladies remarked I should have a chromosome count done. This was moments after I told her that I am presently in size 10 (AU sizes) jeans... They fit beautifully! But I understand once I am taking hormones that I may need to go a size up depending on how big my butt gets! ::)
I also dream about when my own breasts start to fill out, my sisters have from size D cups going up to F cups. I have read quite often that it is common to have a size smaller due to genetics. No matter, I will be happy with Mother Nature decides to give me.
Hugs to all!
Trudi
I just remembered something from Wednesday night, one of the ladies remarked I should have a chromosome count done. This was moments after I told her that I am presently in size 10 (AU sizes) jeans... They fit beautifully! But I understand once I am taking hormones that I may need to go a size up depending on how big my butt gets! ::)
I also dream about when my own breasts start to fill out, my sisters have from size D cups going up to F cups. I have read quite often that it is common to have a size smaller due to genetics. No matter, I will be happy with Mother Nature decides to give me.
Hugs to all!
Trudi
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 06, 2014, 05:12:19 AM
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 06, 2014, 05:12:19 AM
Hiya Trudi
How your body will change is all a bit of a lottery...maybe your shape will be similar to that of your sisters, and maybe not.
Honestly, my recommendation would be to save your money for something you can control, like a nice outfit!
And enjoy the ride... it's weird, but it IS fun... :D
Hugs
Julia
How your body will change is all a bit of a lottery...maybe your shape will be similar to that of your sisters, and maybe not.
Honestly, my recommendation would be to save your money for something you can control, like a nice outfit!
And enjoy the ride... it's weird, but it IS fun... :D
Hugs
Julia
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Trudi on June 06, 2014, 04:32:58 PM
Post by: Trudi on June 06, 2014, 04:32:58 PM
Thank you Julia,
That could well be the case I suppose.
As for the outfit, I did a little shopping the other night to get some things. My ex-partner bought me an Indigo coloured dress which I needed to buy a blouse to go with it, so I bought this lovely one I found at Big-W. The colour is that of the dark pink Bougainvillea, I also needed some flats so I bought a simple but elegant pair as well. A new slip (nude), and a few bits which all came to $75.00. I think I did pretty well. :)
I have included a pic from the other nights outing:
(https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-EgXnjA_dAf0/U47w3HP8cZI/AAAAAAAAAV4/7mB-ja8Ed2s/w459-h803-no/IMAG0028.jpg)
I am quite proud of myself.
I also called my eldest son last night and told him, and he said if that makes you happy then ok. I started crying!
Well, I had better do some tidying up so until later ladies.
Hugs!
Trudi
That could well be the case I suppose.
As for the outfit, I did a little shopping the other night to get some things. My ex-partner bought me an Indigo coloured dress which I needed to buy a blouse to go with it, so I bought this lovely one I found at Big-W. The colour is that of the dark pink Bougainvillea, I also needed some flats so I bought a simple but elegant pair as well. A new slip (nude), and a few bits which all came to $75.00. I think I did pretty well. :)
I have included a pic from the other nights outing:
(https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-EgXnjA_dAf0/U47w3HP8cZI/AAAAAAAAAV4/7mB-ja8Ed2s/w459-h803-no/IMAG0028.jpg)
I am quite proud of myself.
I also called my eldest son last night and told him, and he said if that makes you happy then ok. I started crying!
Well, I had better do some tidying up so until later ladies.
Hugs!
Trudi
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 07, 2014, 01:35:35 AM
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 07, 2014, 01:35:35 AM
You are doing great Trudi...!
I do like the chunky necklace too.
But to have the support of your family is the biggest gift of all. I am happy for you!
xxx
Julia
I do like the chunky necklace too.
But to have the support of your family is the biggest gift of all. I am happy for you!
xxx
Julia
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: gennee on June 07, 2014, 09:17:05 PM
Post by: gennee on June 07, 2014, 09:17:05 PM
Hi Trudi and welcome to Susan's. Another late bloomer having come out at age 56. I'm 65 now and have never been happier.
:)
:)
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Trudi on June 08, 2014, 06:17:16 PM
Post by: Trudi on June 08, 2014, 06:17:16 PM
Thank you ladies! :-*
I have another from Saturday night (Brisbane LGBT friendly nite club), I wanted to make sure I looked ok:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.dmgconsulting.com.au%2FPics%2Fpicture_6.png&hash=d854e9f40ac6e6bc0a35ced0a039e0ccb81ea64a)
Have been trying to do my own hair instead of using a wig, I think I didn't do too badly?
Was only the second time I have been out dressed and it was liberating! But alas something happened on Wednesday's outing... I managed to damage a tendon in my lower left leg which is hampering my movement. Can only move my left foot about an inch and a half upward. I am exercising it every day but very frustrating. I want to wear my boots again!
Well I hope you ladies keep in touch with me, I need to build a support network and in return I can give you some help in return! I have some great recipes & as some people know me as a Trans- Nerd! I work in IT so very proficient with computers.
Chat later,
Trudi
I have another from Saturday night (Brisbane LGBT friendly nite club), I wanted to make sure I looked ok:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.dmgconsulting.com.au%2FPics%2Fpicture_6.png&hash=d854e9f40ac6e6bc0a35ced0a039e0ccb81ea64a)
Have been trying to do my own hair instead of using a wig, I think I didn't do too badly?
Was only the second time I have been out dressed and it was liberating! But alas something happened on Wednesday's outing... I managed to damage a tendon in my lower left leg which is hampering my movement. Can only move my left foot about an inch and a half upward. I am exercising it every day but very frustrating. I want to wear my boots again!
Well I hope you ladies keep in touch with me, I need to build a support network and in return I can give you some help in return! I have some great recipes & as some people know me as a Trans- Nerd! I work in IT so very proficient with computers.
Chat later,
Trudi
Title: Re: Hello world, I am Trudi
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 11, 2014, 07:04:20 AM
Post by: Julia-Madrid on June 11, 2014, 07:04:20 AM
Quote from: Trudi on June 08, 2014, 06:17:16 PM
Have been trying to do my own hair instead of using a wig, I think I didn't do too badly?
I think this is more than a reasonable result! Well done!
xxx
J