Susan's Place Transgender Resources

My Husband(Mtf) and I are pretty young (23 and 24) and we have been married for 3 years now and have not had the chance to have children quite yet. We kept putting it off for reasons like wanting to take time to enjoy being husband and wife and wanting to travel. But now that he has started hrt I am terrified that kids aren't in the picture anymore. I don't want to tell him to stop taking them because I know how hurt he is and how the hrt helps his dysphoria. I just want whats best for both of us. But I always pictured us having a family and now I'm not even sure if its possible. We've had conversations about it. He said he was willing to stop them for a few months so that we can get pregnant and that he would start them again once I was. But my question is what about the future? What is we want to have another child? Can he keep stopping and restarting the hrt without health issues? What if he becomes permanently sterile from the hrt? Keeping sperm in a sperm bank is out of the question due to our financial issues...
Should we just decide not to have kids? I've always picture ourselves as good parents... but what about now? I'm just having a lot of doubts and I don't want to push my husband into a corner...

There are many many ways to have a family. My wife and I have discussed these things as well. For her, she has stated that she gets horrible dysphoria at the idea of "fathering" a child. So banking was out of the question. That doesn't mean children are though. There are donor options or adoption. It doesn't have to be one way or nothing. Just keep these things in mind.

I am thinking about trying to adopt a child in the next  couple of years.

I understand, I can't bank neither for financial reasons too, and I didn't start HRT neither so I'm afflicted if starting anyway without banking or not, even though I really want to... So yeah, you could try save more money I guess, or maybe donate sperm or eggs in order to get your money... I don't think he would be able to stop and restart every time, so yeah...

Wow, I haven't been here in a minute. :)

Sarah (my SO, trans woman) and I have discussed kids in our lives. Before she started HRT, she told me she was unable to reproduce kids who were biologically hers because of physical issues. She has tried before with another partner and was unable to have a baby. Mix that, with HRT causing sterility after a while, our chances of having a child be biologically both ours, are none. She is open to us having a family through various means.

We have settled on, when we decide to start a family, us either going to a sperm bank or ask a really really good friend. Which case, I will have to get a lawyer to assure that our family stays our family. I'm fortunate to have some financial stability and we are able to do that. With other family's experiences with custody battles and such, I am protective.

In the end, it is call that both of you have to make. Though, with HRT, there might be irreversible physical changes which may cause permanent sterility, even if your partner goes off HRT. it is a good conversation to have with a doctor, get time frames of when things happen. Weigh your options, and see what will fit both your lives. I know it sounds like such a generic and unhelpful comment, but this a decision that will affect the both of you. I hope for the best.

OOPS: I used the word sterility instead of infertility. Yikes! Sorry folks.